User talk:Bad Shroom

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Mermaid with dolphin.jpg
Welcome to the wondrous world of Uncyclopedia!

Hello, Bad Shroom, and welcome to Uncyclopedia! Thank you for your contributions. I hope you like the place and decide to stay. If not, the door's right over there... no, a little more to your left... Yes. You seem to have a sense of humor, but to be sure that it corresponds to the kind of humor that is accepted on this site, I suggest checking out the following links:

  • Beginner's Guide - A massive guide about how to be the best you can be at Uncyclopedia. I've honestly never read the whole thing in one sitting myself, but it is very useful if you're looking for help on a specific issue.
  • How to be funny and not just stupid - Our flagship link. This will tell you how to not get booed off the metaphorical stage that is Uncyclopedia. I STRONGLY suggest reading the entire thing through, perhaps more than once.
  • Our Vanity Policies - This page details why we don't care about your friends, your school, your gay fourth period math teacher, or the homework he has you do, and in-jokes. DO NOT violate these rules.
  • Uncyclopedia:Best of - For a bit of inspiration. These are our featured articles. This is the kind of stuff we like to read around here.

Now that that's out of the way, just continue reading and you'll notice some more links. These ones are about help in general:

At Uncyclopedia, writing articles is not a requirement, but I do recommend it, it can be quite enjoyable, and it's a good chance to let others take notice of your writing. To write an article, it's recommended that you start it in your userspace (for example, User:Bad Shroom/Article about stuff) so you can edit it at your leisure. If you decide to create it in the cold world of mainspace, make sure it is in accordance with the policies laid out above, and if you're not done put the "Work-In-Progress" template - {{construction}} - onto it as well.

If you want to write and don't know where to begin, consider contributing to Uncyclopedia's current colonization of the week, a group writing project to improve a single popular article. Anyone is welcome to contribute, so come help out! If the current colonization doesn't suit your fancy, then browse our rewrite and idea categories. We have lots of articles just sitting around for someone to improve, so don't be afraid - dive right in!

If you need help, ask me on my talkpage, ask at the Dump, or ask an administrator on their talkpage. Additionally, the Adopt-a-Noob program is there to bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian, and remember: Have fun with it. We're all here to have a good time and a good laugh. Please sign your name on talkpages using four tildes (~~~~) or use the "sign" button (button_sig.png) above the edit box. Again, welcome!

Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 20:03, 15 April 2009 (UTC)


Your Phail article was deleted. You can try working on it in your userspace, where it won't be deleted. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 12:05, 16 April 2009 (UTC)


It's a reasonable start, but I'm afraid I can't help you with it. The subject is a little bit too random. As I said earlier, it may be easier to put these articles in your userspace and expand them there. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 22:35, 16 April 2009 (UTC)

Your articles[edit]

Though they are/were funny to a certain extent, they didn't meet the expectations of what articles on Uncyclopedia should look like. I advise you to read BGBU and HTBFANJS. It's not meant to insult you or anything, I'm quite sure they'll be very helpful to you. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 22:39, 16 April 2009 (UTC)


I'm not the one deleting your articles. When you go to the title of your deleted article, you should see a log of the deletion somewhere, also mentioning the name of the user that deleted it. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 22:45, 16 April 2009 (UTC)

My QVFD[edit]

Let me show you it. If you see a crap n00b article that should obviously be deleted (such as Thetons) just put it on that page and an admin will take care of it. Remember though that QVFD is only for new articles. Preexisting crap should be put on VFD. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN21:02, 23 Apr

You aren't funny...[edit]

Do you want to know why I keep reverting your edits to my article. It's because you have the writing skill of a nine-year old. In case you hadn't noticed, all of those DSiWare applications were real. Grue on the go, seriously? OMG a grue kills me, how funny. LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!! No, just, no. You have no finesse. You just spew out crap and paint it all over good articles. Your crap derailed my article, and that's why I deleted it. If someone who edits it makes it genuinely funny, then I would be okay with it. I have read (and comprehended) HTBFANJS. I also know it isn't spelled HTFAJNS. The point is, your "humor" is completely juvenile. Judging by the above messages talking about your articles being deleted, I'm not the only one who thinks so. So, maybe you should read all the writing guides Uncyclopedia has for beginners, and you can actually write good articles. Oh, and, "get a life"? Where is this random insult generator you used, I want to try it. PS: You're supposed to put spaces after punctuation marks.

-- Aethix ~ Talk|Contributions|My project Kirbywave2.gif 15:38, 25 April 2009 (UTC)


“WHAT THE HELL?Stop editing Pokemon Island, dangit!your humor sucks bollocks, and the page already has an ICU.Considering something else than comedy, like a garbage man?Sorry..”

~ Bad Shroom on hypocrisy

Isn't it a little hypocritical to get mad at me for reverting your edits on my Nintendo DSi article when you revert the edits of Natedog9090 on your Pokemon Island article and insult him on his talk page for it. So what, you can dish it out but you can't take it? Yes, the Pee Review said it needs work, but hey, at least my article doesn't have an ICU tag on it. -- Aethix ~ Talk|Contributions|My project Kirbywave2.gif 02:31, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

People! Please! There is no need to insult eachother! Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 16:55, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

This is your cease and decease order[edit]

I don't care if you're an admin on whichever wikia. Around here you treat your fellow editors nicely, or you don't edit here at all. I will not be saying that again. ~Jewriken.GIF 17:16, 26 April 2009 (UTC)

I see you're trying to help.[edit]

Use this if you want to report any jackasses. Also, I really don't think this guy did anything wrong. I mean, seriously? --Aljolson.jpg Hi, hey! I'M A MOTERFUCKING NIGGER BITCH LOVER Aljolson.jpg 22:58, 4 May 2009 (UTC)

Please don't feed the trolls[edit]

Thanks:)--Sycamore (Talk) 23:04, 6 May 2009 (UTC)

Userspace pages[edit]

Don't go blanking pages in someone else's userspace. You may have a version in your own userspace, but what's in theirs is their deal, not yours. You think they don't need it? Leave a message on their talk page, or the talk page of the article in question - don't blank other people's stuff, OK? --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 10:03, May 7

Observe this giant angry tilde[edit]

Follow the instructions clearly, please. S-984 17:33, 24 May 2009 (UTC)

Real help needed to contribute on my Giratinaton article[edit]

Thanks for your contribution to my article. Can you continue contributing to my article? I needed as much help as you needed on your article. Thanks. GiratinaOriginForme.png |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Man on Fire CUN|IC Kill Don't be fooled. I'm an Aussie too. | 08:44, 27 May 2009 (UTC)

Mario Wiki[edit]

How did you know it was me? And I'm retired from editing and going to Mario Wiki, especially going, or show up. (psst, see my bio for more)—Extrasolar intelligence revealed! By this fish! By the way, if this was in the UnNews, it would be called: UnNews:Wierd fish that can detect radio waves "detected" alien conversation from a nearby planet.Flutter Fan girl 1.jpg Tuwoolookie! | My History | Brute! Nuke explosion.gif 06:05, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

That's great! At least I'm getting noticeable now —Extrasolar intelligence revealed! By this fish! By the way, if this was in the UnNews, it would be called: UnNews:Wierd fish that can detect radio waves "detected" alien conversation from a nearby planet.Flutter Fan girl 1.jpg Tuwoolookie! | My History | Brute! Nuke explosion.gif 15:44, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Random Usernames[edit]

Random? I'll have you know that the De Radio clan has had a long and established tradition in several continents. In fact we were instrumental in upholding the virtues of the Royal Family for centuries. You know the old HMV symbol... It's a puppy, and a... okay, a gramophone, but my great great uncle didn't know how to draw a radio. but what does HMV stand for. We told the public it stood for "His Master's Voice" but it actually harks back to 1066 when we were there to protect "His Majesties Virtue." Okay, we may be crap at our job, but if we can't make them virtuous, we will instead hide their peccadilloes by spreading misinformation and rumour, hence the n00bishness of coming to Uncyclopedia. Puppion De Radio XXI Woof!

Oh, and thanks for the vote. I was going to make a template thank you thingy, but then thought, "Wouldn't it be nicer if you simply gave everyone who voted for you a small sample of your insanity?' Pup 00:34, 7 July 2009 (UTC)


hello there. i cant say that we've met before. but i need some help. i feel as though my article, ExOps, which is about a private military company, isn't up to it's full potential. can you help me improve it? i'll give you anything you desire, exept for what you are thinking of.


Sig template[edit]

I moved it to the proper location. Do you know how to set it up in your preferences? ~Jewriken.GIF 15:54, 8 July 2009 (UTC)

Hey there[edit]

I'm guessing you were calling out Vile pestilence meted out by God to punish sodomites for being a bad article, but there is a much better way of doing it. If you see a new article like that, that should obviously be deleted, go to qvfd, and post it there. (This only works for new articles, however. And if an article has a {{Construction}} template on it, it is exempt from qvfd.) Blanking the page/putting a template on there is usually not the way to go. We all do like the help trying to clean out the crap though. Keep up the good work. Woody On Fire! Wood burning.gifTalking Woody Stalking Woody 21:30, 8 July 2009 (UTC)

Ref: Your sig[edit]


  1. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc!
  2. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc!
  3. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc!
  4. -Almost Sir Random Crap
  5. -Almost Sir Random Crap
  6. -Almost Sir Random Crap

See how the gaps between 3&4, 4&5, 5&6 are bigger than normal? That means your sig is too tall. Make it less so, lest you anger the sig gods! Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 05:09, 17 July 2009 (UTC)

Your request?[edit]

A few months back, you requested an image, It was never, to my knowledge, ever answered. So I've answered it:
Badass archangel.png
Please tell me what you think, if I can make it better, and how. I would appreciate a response, seeing as I put nearly 2 hours into it.
Thanks, Rbpolsen Icons-flag-us.png 08:55, 17 July 2009 (UTC)


It's going on now. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 13:43, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

League Info[edit]

League ID: 322847

Password: wilde

League URL:

Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 15:37, 23 July 2009 (UTC)


If you can't sign into Yahoo!, you can still draft a team, and I can just make a dummy team. In any event, make your pick!Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:59, 23 July 2009 (UTC)

You Don't win![edit]

You will never win at it -- GBA2005 I Want You! 17:29, 27 July 2009 (UTC)

I can't believe I'm asking you this, but...[edit]

For some reason, nobody except me is editing Forum:Who HATES MochiAds?. Do you think you don't know how to say it... I can't keep the thread going on my own. Could you add to it to get the ball rolling again? <insert name here> <(^_^<)Meh.Meh. Meh. or something like that 21:31, 31 July 2009 (UTC)


S-984 01:41, 2 August 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: July 30th, 2009[edit]

It's on time, you were just high and didn't realize when it got here! THEDUDEBOT Armed and Ready Say The Word 22:08, 3 August 2009 (UTC)

You're an idiot[edit]

That is all.~~ Sir Ljlego, GUN  [talk] 22:39, 6 August 2009 (UTC)

I concur. Please stop wasting our time. -- pyrrhic Ape (clapperclaw) (Riot Porn) 22:42, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
Also...never create a forum topic again. Ever. Leave me a message if you feel the need to create one and I'll approve of it myself. If you set forth a request to start a meme-related forum I will personally destroy you to the greatest extent of my power. Now, THAT is all.~~ Sir Ljlego, GUN  [talk] 22:50, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
Ljlego is an admin, so be careful the way you handle this, Shroom. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 23:19, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
You might as well take the offer, Shroom. It won't be that bad, trust me. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 00:03, 7 August 2009 (UTC)
Yeah. It'll only be temporary. You argue with Lj and things will go a lot worse for you. Trust me. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN00:05, 7 Aug
I hear he once slit a guy's throat with the CD of The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway... -- pyrrhic Ape (clapperclaw) (Riot Porn) 00:15, 7 August 2009 (UTC)

Help on Pokedex article[edit]

Man, you gotta contribute! Half of the Pokemon is not listed, and we need your help! GiratinaOriginForme.png |Si Plebius Dato' Joe ang Man on Fire CUN|IC Kill Don't be fooled. I'm an Aussie too. | 10:02, 8 August 2009 (UTC)

Snorlax females? Although on a side note, how many are you going to do? If you go beyond the original 151 then you stand a real chance of running a possibly good article into the ground. Pup t 01:46, 9/08/2009


Image you could use for HowTo:Achieve World Domination in a Recession. --Docile hippopotamus 00:57, 9 August 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost! August 6th, 2009!! WE BE LATE, Y'ALL!!![edit]

Hand delivered by MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 22:02, 10 August 2009 (UTC)


Anything to replace that mexican man joke? It's a bit basic. Otherwise the whole idea looks OK to me. -- Style Oranssiviiva.jpg Guide 18:00, 15 August 2009 (UTC)

Gotta think about it a bit. Fart jokes are the basis of our existence so it's going to have to be about that. How about "someone on a protein diet"? Leave out mention of flatulence, let the reader think it out (not hard). How about gathering the gas from the toilet of the local gym, where everyone is on a protein diet? -- Style Oranssiviiva.jpg Guide 18:08, 15 August 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 13th August 2009. It's not late. You are![edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 20:27, Aug 18


Remove the Sir thingy from your sig until you've earned it. Thanks. ~Jewriken.GIF 21:20, 18 August 2009 (UTC)

You mind explaining why you're harrassing noobs?[edit]

This guy was just offering to help and you jumped all over him. Who exactly do you think you are tell other people to come back when they have written something funny? Please stop trolling and do some work-- pyrrhic Ape (clapperclaw) (Riot Porn) 23:47, 18 August 2009 (UTC)

Seconded, and the next time you call a noob asking a question a noob-tard, I'll make sure to express my opinion in a more stern manner. ~Jewriken.GIF 08:07, 19 August 2009 (UTC)
To be fair Mr 9000 "jumped all over him" by calling him a troll and banning him for a week. --Docile hippopotamus 08:30, 19 August 2009 (UTC)
To be fair, this isn't an open day on Shroom's talk page. Without looking into the other guy's attributes, this is not the way to treat other noobs. No need to add further to this discussion. ~Jewriken.GIF 08:40, 19 August 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 20th August, it's not late, your mom is![edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 11:01, Aug 24

Flying Sperm Whale[edit]


Is this about right? Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 17:02, 30 August 2009 (UTC)

Bad Shroom[edit]

Just let his talkpage be. If he wants it blank, let him. It's not important. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 19:04, 30 August 2009 (UTC)

HowTo Kick Ass[edit]

I liked your HowTo:Achieve World Domination in a Recession. Maybe with some edits you could get it featured! Also I just joined today but I edited Wikipedia a lot. Am I too new to vote for VFH? Why do I need to provide this? 04:36, September 2, 2009 (UTC)

Hey, I'll answer your question, since so far as I know Bad Shroom is currently banned. There is no such thing as too new to vote for VFH, we accept votes from anyone (even those without a account, though their votes only count half). You can nominate whatever you want for VFH as well, though nominating utter crap may get you in trouble. I would recommend reading some of our featured content to familiarise yourself with the standard here, although, in the end, you should vote for whatever you find funny and against what you don't. Hope that helps. -- pyrrhic Ape (clapperclaw) (Riot Porn) 14:15, September 2, 2009 (UTC)
I was just banned for one day. and thank you, Why do I need to provide this, for supporting my article.--Almost Sir Random Crap


Bad Shroom, I'm sure I'm not the first to tell you this but I really don't like your attitude. In fact it seems as if a lot of people on Uncyc don't really like you. Chuck Norris was not created by God.

-- 22:43, September 3, 2009 (UTC)

P.S. I'm cowguru2000.

God was created by Chuck Norris. Why do I need to provide this? 11:58, September 4, 2009 (UTC)
It could be argued in theology that Chuck Norris, as represtenting the human race, is more likely to have created 'God' than God to create Chuck Norris. mAttlobster. (hello) 12:02, September 4, 2009 (UTC)
It could also be argued that you're a large marine crustacean. Why do I need to provide this? 12:11, September 4, 2009 (UTC)
I would encourage you to construct such an argument. mAttlobster. (hello) 12:23, September 4, 2009 (UTC)
If I can deduce, it seems you two are having an argument on another man's talkpage. Lobster, non-providing user, if you two would kindly excuse yourselves.--Almost Sir Random Crap
Shut-it Shroom face. mAttlobster. (hello) 13:47, September 4, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4th September[edit]

-- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 16:55, September 4, 2009 (UTC)

Hey there cunty fuck[edit]

You totally stole my sig thing! That makes me sad. (Also, cunty fuck is a term of affection, not abuse, here in Ireland, so don't go crying about it.) -- pyrrhic Ape (clapperclaw) (Riot Porn) 22:47, September 6, 2009 (UTC)

Quasi Featured[edit]

Is for articles that got at least 50% of the votes that the leading article on the day of the removal from the queue. As your article didn't get that, it's not eligible for quasi-feature. ~Jewriken.GIF 14:51, September 7, 2009 (UTC)

I'm newer here than you are, Bad Shroom, but from what I've seen you're a talented, funny writer who pushes a bit too far into oldtimer/admin territory. You might want to try to pretend to be modest. Yeah, I know, if people were really modest nobody would think their work was good enough to post here and this site wouldn't exist. Come to think of it, the Internet wouldn't exist. But here, pretending might help keep away the rabid pterodactyls. WHY??? 20:22, September 7, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost Randomber 79th[edit]

To cut a long story short, please think of the baptized autobiographys! Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 16:48, 7 September 2009


A miserable thanks[edit]

Thank you for supporting! (In case you need a translation, here's one.) MacManiasig.png MacManiasig-cheerios.png MacManiasig-holmes.png MacManiasig-starwars.png MacManiasig-firefly.png MacManiasig-pixar.png MacManiasig-oregon.png MacManiasig-lesmiz.png MacManiasig-doctor.png 16px-HalLogo.png Portal16px.png UncycLensFlare16px.pngDalek16px.png 16px-ChekhovSig.png16px-JapanSig.png Sir MacMania GUN[21:10 14 Sep 2009]


hey shroom. thanks for helping out with the signpost this week. are you going to finish that article off, or do you want me to? i'm going to actually try to get it finished and delivered tomorrow. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 08:23, September 19, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost September 10/17[edit]

This would've gotten here last week, but it's my firs week as paperboy and I got lost. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 00:20, September 23, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: September 24th, 2009[edit]

Hand delivered by MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 16:35, September 26, 2009 (UTC)

Noob Tanks[edit]

User:Why do I need to provide this?/NotM thanks

HowTo Pee on Your Attempt to Achieve World Domination in a Recession[edit]

I Pee Reviewed HowTo:Achieve World Domination in a Recession based on version 4121870 of 24 Sept. 2009. I'm sorry it took almost a month for somebody to get around to reviewing this--the time lag for last month was ridiculous. Fortunately, some of us are working to catch things up. I hope I technically shouldn't have reviewed this because I made a few very minor edits to the article myself. In any case, hope my review helps! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  20:05, October 5, 2009 (UTC)

Please see my comments on Finsh'd on my talk page. Thanks. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  22:17, October 5, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost: October 1st, 2009[edit]

Late deliver courtesy of MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 20:32, October 5, 2009 (UTC)


You know if you don't like me you can tell me and not someone else. But, anyway could you be more specif in what I did that I should get banned for. I made one forum that you don't like and you just might not have seen my articles please tell me what I did.--Click meNO NOT ME!! I don't care if you click me 00:32, October 9, 2009 (UTC)


to IC. Feel free to add the appropriate template to your user page. -OptyC Sucks! Icons-flag-us.png CUN17:21, 9 Oct

Imperial Colonization and other "Collaborations"[edit]

I'm posting a comment here instead of at Uncyclopedia talk:Imperial Colonization/project because I realized I needed to back away from that for a bit. Seriously, thank you for your comment, even if it was tongue-in-cheek insulting (or tongue-in-cheek complimenting). I started to post another rant, then thought "B.S. is right. I really do need to back away and shut up." So really, I agree with you. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  22:44, October 9, 2009 (UTC)

You are welcome.--Bad Shroom 22:57, October 9, 2009 (UTC)

your article -how to acheive.... um.. something or other....[edit]

I don't know if you noticed my changes to the VFH page. My feelings I think are pretty similar to Miley's, except I don't believe in abstaining - you're either against the terrorists, or with them! I'm currently working on giving you some feedback that can halp you. I've never done a PEE review before, but I've been told repeatedly that I should be an editor instead of working with computers. I hope to have some constructive feedback for you within the next hour or so left on its talk page. All better now? :D -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 18:47, Oct 10

Ahh but this is not a standard review! I'm going through it line by line fixing grammatical errors and leaving comments on everything that leaves me underwhelmed. It's not just a review on the article as a whole, it's leaving feedback and suggestions on each small part I don't quite like. That's why I'm probably going to take an hour or so. -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 18:54, Oct 10
If you look at the reviews made by people such as ChiefjusticeDC, Miley Spears, and, ahem, myself, you'll find that's the way we often do Pee Reviews (although I don't think any of us make changes to an article we Pee Review until and unless the author has had a chance to look at our suggestions and tell us if they want their reviewer butting in.) King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  19:07, October 10, 2009 (UTC)
I was going to post "If you don't mind me making a lot of edits, I wouldn't mind." But I see you have someone else who's volunteered to help. I notice that some of the against votes were mild, and it looks like they're potential fors with improvements. I would suggest, however, that you not ask a number of people to help at the same time because you can end up with a situation like what just happened with Teh_pwnerator and I. Also once something's nominated I think people here don't like changes being made to an article (other than very minor grammatical fixes) because they feel like the article they voted for is not the same article. For example, I wouldn't recommend changing a photo in the middle of a nomination. I hope this helps! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  19:01, October 10, 2009 (UTC)
I call editing the talk page, you can make edits to the article! that way we won't edit conflict. -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 19:05, Oct 10
Oh, uh, good ideas from both of you. God, I ask for one featured article and I get a media circus. Thanks ahead, anyway!-Almost Sir Random Crap
(Now we're trying to edit this talk page at the same time). I appreciate your suggestion, Teh PWNerator, but personally it would be easier for me to simply make edits to the article after other editors have done their work rather than compare the article to edits made on a talk page and then try to edit. I won't be making any edits to it before Monday anyway. King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  19:12, October 10, 2009 (UTC)

I just added some of my first pass through part of your article to the talk page. please don't edit the talk page for your article yet, i hate haet hat edit conflicts -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 19:21, Oct 10

ok, look on the talk page for my words of wisdom. For the parts I gave you suggestions on what to say, it was a general idea, not a word for word, and it would be a lot better for you to take those ideas and word them how you think would be best (at least, if you choose to take them). Also I like your pictures except for the first one, to which I can only say 'scuse me, but what? it doesn't seem to match with anything else in the entire article. -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 21:17, Oct 10

How to...[edit]

Hey. World Domination needs some significant work, and by putting it on VFH while work is still progressing is self destructive, and arguing on a VFH nom is self destructive. Take the entire article and dump it onto a user page, and start writing all sorts of random bullshit, no matter how corny, crap or not. Expand this to about twice the size it is now. And then start cutting bits out that you don't like as much as others, until it's about half the length again. At the moment it is too short, and it needs a better format.

As an example have a look at the way this article changed over time

Which is a long and complicated way of saying that this is a good article as it is, but it is an article in the process of becoming FA. It needs more work, and I'd suggest get numerous reviews before you look at putting this forward again.

Sorry if I seem to pontificating, but I think this shows some real promise and has some real highlights. I would like to see it feature, so I'd be very happy to see it worked on a substantial amount. Pup t 07:48, 11/10/2009

Ditto what Puppy said. When I first put something up on Sun Bee, I got a note to read how to be funny not stupid. I worked on it, and got it Pee Reviewed (my score was a dismal "nearly adequate"). I worked on it, followed other people's suggestions, etc., and right now it's on VFH with a score of 8 (last time I checked). King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  01:28, October 12, 2009 (UTC)


I moved your article here, in your userspace, as the ICU expired, but I figured it had too much potential to delete. Work on it a bit more here before you return it to mainspace. Good luck! --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 08:56, Oct 12

I looked at the thing in the place and...[edit]

...while cool, I don't know enough about it to be able to help. Sorry. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 23:02, October 13, 2009 (UTC)

Welcome to UnNews[edit]

I've moved your article to User:Bad Shroom/NASA launches Rockets at Moon for Water; Recession being ignored because it's not really qualified to be considered a viable UnNews article. I moved it rather than ICU as a courtesy. Read my welcoming drivel below for ideas as to why, and ideas on how to make it better.

Reverend Zim_ulator says: "There are coffee cup stains on this copy, damnit! Now that's good UnJournalism."

Welcome to UnNews, Bad Shroom, and thank you for contributing some crap, or otherwise attracting my attention. For a quick introduction about how you can write a decent or better UnNews article, please take a minute read our spiffy new Style Guide.

I am your humble servant (in your dreams), and if I may be of help to you, please leave me a note on my talk page.

Good things that can happen to you

You can win awards and prizes! You can become a better writer by subjecting your articles to the scrutiny of UnNews critique machine or UnCanninator shit article detection system. You can become a thorn in the side of Journalism as a whole. You can get promotions, ribbons, and free crockery! You can write stuff your mom would be ashamed to show her friends.

What happened to my article?

If you've submitted an article, and it's disappeared, I may have mercy-moved it to your user space. This means I've probably left a message on your talk page, likely in close proximity to this very message, explaining why.

Your article may have been tagged for ICU if it has significant problems meeting our criteria, or I may have deleted it because you did not register as a user.

Finally, maybe you just pissed me off. I mean, I know I'm a Roshi, and I'm supposed to be all "Zen" about everything, but I have bad days too, you know?

UnNews Audio

If you are interested in doing an UnNews audio, check this out.

UnNews UnFunnies

At present, I create UnCartoons for UnNews all by my onesies, for better or worse. Now, I will never claim that I am a good cartoonist. Fortunately, the internet provides us a way to do all sorts of things simply and easily. I found, a great site to create cartoons with a minimum of talent.

This document is an ongoing effort by me to enhance the obfuscation coefficient of Uncyclopedia; productive changes, and criticism are welcome. Cheers! The Right and Left Reverend Major Sir Zimbuddha.jpg Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:38, March 28, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost Sometime October 2009[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 01:09, Oct 16

HowTo:Achieve World Domination in a Recession[edit]

Congratulations on getting HowTo:Achieve World Domination in a Recession made the Featured HowTo! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  01:27, October 17, 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, you can thank me for that. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 01:55, 17 October 2009

I just had a thought. I think my User:Why do I need to provide this?/HowTo:Be Homeless in America may have been partially inspired by your article. I didn't do that conciously, but your article might have been in the back of my head. If so, thanks! King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  01:48, October 17, 2009 (UTC)

Bad Shroom's bee says[edit]

User:Why do I need to provide this?/Sun Bee thanks King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  05:47, October 20, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost 22nd 23rd October 2009[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 18:06, Oct 23

UnSignpost 29-10-2009[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 01:29, Nov 3


Hi Bad, I have a vague idea about your stormtrooper article. It goes something like the one in Kafka's Giant Mole (not sure of the english name but it's about a giant garden mole or such). Start out by playing the character up quite a bit: make it look as if he had great deeds ahead of him. Phrases like "destiny", "violent future", "the abyss he was destine to fall into", "the ghastly vortex of his future" or shit like that. (In other words, change the structure some, sorry). No jokes there. Then, build it up to some sort of climax - and then trail off to something related, trail further off, and let the whole thing peter out in the end. It takes sveral sessions to do it properly, and probably the use of footnotes to make it work (since those can mislead the reader nicely). Just the way I would do it of course. But since you have picked a character that has no significance, of course you would want to lead the reader to believe he has some significance after all - and cheat him. It's gotta be subtle to be a good joke but can be done. Oh yes and use the actual Kafka trick there: don't mention the stormtrooper at all in the final chapter or two, but just keep to the related stuff, whatever it is. Related enough to justify including it - but barely. -- Style Oranssiviiva.jpg Guide 09:15, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

Okay, you mangy colonists.[edit]

I've been commissioned by Mooshy to rerererevitalize IC. I'm to be the glorious leader, etc. because Sissy, Gerry, and Opty have all fucked off. So, I have a few general ideas to start with on what to do. First of all, no fucking infighting. What's said by the authority figures goes. This is Imperial Colonization, not Imperial United States Congress. Second, there should be more of a limit on articles for nomination. Somewhere between 5 and 10. We'll never get to all 17 that are up there if people's votes are so scattered. Third, an active recruiting drive. It fits the name. We're going to draft Satirical Soldiers to deal with the bloody natives at those shit articles on IC. This said, I still want to hear all of your opinions on what to do. Either drop me a line on my talk page, or I'm on IRC damn near all day very weekday. So lets get going, Colonizers! Where the Wild Colins Are - LET THE WILD RUMPUS START! 16:57, November 11, 2009 (UTC)

It's two babies![edit]

I had a baby

It's a baby and her name is Puffskein! And look, she's already learning sign language!
Father Why? has another baby! It's a bouncing little mermaid.

And then another baby! Please say hi to your new second cousins or cousins twice removed or something, Puffskein and Little Mermaid! Father Why do I need to provide this?, humble rector of the University of Our Lady of Uncyclopedia, Whynersville Father WHY??? (confessions)  19:24, November 30, 2009 (UTC)

Where ya been?[edit]

Also where ya been? King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  19:24, November 30, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost Delivery! - December something![edit]

Late deliver courtesy of MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 00:07, December 30, 2009 (UTC)

UnSignpost January several-days-agoth[edit]

I swore I'd never hand-deliver this again. Here it is. --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 10:12, Jan 18

UnSignpost 21th January 2009[edit]

Also, it's MrN9000's mum's 60th birthday! 9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 17:31, Jan 21

UnSignpost 28th January 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 14:50, Jan 28


Duty Calls! Imperial Colonization has been commandeered! With a shiny new, waterproof coat, we're heading out to sea once again. We need you for our next colonization. You have one week to nominate or vote from right now, Sunday the 31st of January 2010, to Saturday the 6th of February 2010. (See Protocol for how to nominate an article for Colonization. And remember, if you vote for an article that means you intend to help colonize it.) Then starting Sunday, 7 February 2010, we will start colonizing another savage land (i.e., improving whichever article gets the most votes). Come on board and vote or nom now, to the glory of Her Majesty!

EXTRA: Our most recent colonization, Transformers, has just been Pee Reviewed. If you're interested in making improvements, please check out the article and the review. With a little work, we may have another glorious Feature article! Wouldn't that be just spiffy? And remember, if you participate and this does get featured, you get one half feature credit!

For the Glory of Her Majesty and by Order of your Fearful Fearless Leader, King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  19:39, January 30, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 15:07, Feb 4


The Bible says God created the world in six days by himself--our crew of talented colonizers can surely recreate an article in a week and a half! Remember, any Colonizer is welcome to work on our current project, which is the Creationism article. But before you begin, check "READ THIS FIRST" at the top. From Sunday, 7 February to Wednesday, 10 February 2010, a hearty crew of brave colonizers plotted a strong course for the article by consensus. We have the beginning of a great colonization, so go forth and colonize to the glory of Her Majesty!

Special Note for Lobsterbacks (i.e. those who signed up but haven't yet worked on a successful colonization). We plan to keep your name on the honored membership list if you make worthwhile contribution to the article or other parts of Imperial Colonization between 31 January 2010 and the end of this project. If your name is removed from the list, you are welcome to reapply when you plan to become active. User:Why do I need to provide this?/sig10 05:17, February 11, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 11th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 12:57, Feb 11

UnSignpost 18th February 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 23:31, Feb 18

UnSignpost 25th February 2010 (It's not late your mum is)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 20:38, Feb 28

User:Why do I need to provide this?/IC Batman Begins User:Why do I need to provide this?/sig10 03:43, March 4, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 4th March 2010 (your calendar is wrong)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 00:05, Mar 6

UnSignpost 11th March 2010[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 10:57, Mar 12

User:Why do I need to provide this?/IC Why plank King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  16:54, March 17, 2010 (UTC)

User:Why do I need to provide this?/IC Why plank King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  16:57, March 17, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 18th March 2010 (on time as always)[edit]

9001(bot) Icons-flag-gb.png HalIcon.png MrNCyber.JPG 11:42, Mar 18

Discordianism vote needed quickly and member retirement[edit]

User:Why do I need to provide this?/Discordianism vote King of the Internet Alden Loveshade??? (royal court)  18:28, March 24, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 25th March 2010 (hand delivered for added flavour)[edit]

--ChiefjusticePS3 22:39, March 25, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 1th April 2010 - Always on time[edit]

Nominally Humane! some time Friday, 04:49, Apr 2 2010 UTC

UnSignpost 4/8/10 - Oh hi Signpost.[edit]

MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 20:14, April 8, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 15/4/10 - Yet another on time delivery.[edit]

--ChiefjusticePS3 21:19, April 15, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost 1 May[edit]

Brought to you by fucking magic. Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 11:24, 1 May 2010

The UnSignpost Is Not Dead![edit]

A new UnSignpost issue, another template spammed onto your talkpage, enjoy! Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 16:03, 24 June 2010

All the news that's unfit to print![edit]

--ChiefjusticePS3 12:21, July 1, 2010 (UTC)

Signpost: normal service resumed[edit]

Oh dear god, am I really doing this again? --UU - natter UU Manhole.gif 11:00, Jul 9

Another UnSignpost! Rejoice![edit]

Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 10:23, 16 July 2010

Read all about it! The UnSignpost rides again![edit]

--ChiefjusticePS3 14:05, July 22, 2010 (UTC)

It's new and it's news! It's the latest UnSignpost![edit]

Sir SockySexy girls.jpg Mermaid with dolphin.jpg Tired Marilyn Monroe.jpg (talk) (stalk)Magnemite.gif Icons-flag-be.png GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotYPotM WotM 16:06, 5 August 2010

Ruddy hell! It's the UnSignpost[edit]

--ChiefjusticePS3 12:07, August 20, 2010 (UTC)

Avast me hearties![edit]

Colony Potato.jpg
By the powers! this e'er be fer a reminder o' tha great, grand Imperial Colonization be startin' up again!

Whether you be a sprog or a privateer we be expectin' ya ta come 'round an participate in this sweet trade lessen' you be a lily-livered squiffy, scallywag, or scurvy dog thar.

Aye! ~ Buccaneer Happytimes. Happytimes_pi.gif

The current project: Dinosaur

Now in the writing phase
(Oh UN:IC, how your rules are now broken....)

UnSignpost - This is definitely not late; you're just drunk[edit]

MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 12:56, September 9, 2010 (UTC)

UnSignpost - The UnSignpost Rides Again![edit]

Read All About It![edit]

--ChiefjusticePS3 14:26, November 18, 2010 (UTC)

Run for your lives! It's another UnSignpost.[edit]

~ Pointy.png *shifty eyes* (talk) (stalk) -- 20101125 - 01:02 (UTC)

Don't you love the smell of the UnSignpost in the morning?[edit]

--Wanna see a magic trick? 05:09, December 2, 2010 (UTC)

The UnSignpost, now with 25% less saturated fat[edit]

--ChiefjusticePS3 16:10, December 9, 2010 (UTC)

Oh shit! It's another unsignpost![edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 05:23, 16 December 2010

This is it... the 100th UnSignpost.[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 06:51, 23 December 2010

UnSignpost, UnSignpost, eat it right here...[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 21:36, 30 December 2010

UnSignpost Delivery![edit]

Nominally Humane! some time Thursday, 09:56, Jan 6 2011 UTC

UnSignpost Delivery![edit]

Nominally Humane! some time Thursday, 03:15, Jan 13 2011 UTC

Do not attempt to adjust your set. This is the UnSignpost.[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 08:15, 20 January 2011

UnSignpost! Wheeee![edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 04:42, 27 January 2011

The UnSignpost is now served with complimentary tacos.[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 02:33, 3 February 2011

This edition of the UnSignpost brought to you in two's complement...[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 02:26, 10 February 2011

Lurg luuurg unsignpost luuuuurg[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 06:13, 17 February 2011

UnSignnull pointer exception[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 07:45, 24 February 2011

All the UnSignpost you ever wanted[edit]

1234 ~ 16px-Pointy.png 16:06, 3 March 2011

UnSignpost: March 10th, 2011[edit]