Portal:Portals
A portal is an introductory page for a given topic. It points out good articles on a topic, allowing non-featured material to be highlighted in some form. Portals also help editors find related projects and things they can do to help improve Uncyclopedia.
Portals are the best way to start exploring Uncyclopedia. Or, they would be, if it wasn't for the fact that most people don't really care about them, so they aren't really edited that much. But we can always pretend that they're active, for the sake of maintaining a minimum of credibility as an encyclopaedic wiki.
This page explains how portals work.
Uncyclopedia is a poor, meme-ridden "comedy" website that has cemented itself into online infamy. The site, which is thought to have originated in 1860 as an American imperialist tool for global domination, is now a multi-national effort and is viewed as the best of its kind by some.
Uncyclopedia specializes in tedious mockery of perceived competitors and petty in-fighting, with much of the content seen as mass-produced junk. Yet, there remains a peculiar fondness for some of the articles by fanatics. This is a view that has sparked a substantial shift from the site's satirical aspirations, causing it to instead redirect its resources into pathetic Russian reversals and endless references to Chuck Norris. This is compounded by the need for articles that appease a "softer consensus".
- Some mega pop star and her boyfriend get engaged. Yaaay.
- NFL teams replace female cheerleaders with gay dudes
- Trump presents new science project to Cabinet (Pictured)
- Uncyclopedia introduces AI Age Guesser™, petition nears 100,000 signatures
- Trump fires Zakk Wylde
- Trump sends condolences to "Ozzie Nelson," "Paul Hogan," "Luigi Mangione"
- Epstein list predictions
- Starmer bans pornography nationwide
- Ozzy Osbourne remembers Uncyclopedia
- Obama to Democrats: "toughen up, you fucking pussies!"
Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russia/Ukraine and Israel/Hamas "peace talks" • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • SNL cast exodus • Chicago Bears winning the preseason • K-pop: The Movie
Recent deaths: Ozzy Osbourne • Chuck Mangione • Hulk Hogan • Resident Alien • Down syndrome • Tom Lehrer • The system • FUBAR • Cartoon Network on Comcast's basic cable package • Sydney Sweeney's new movie • Terence Stamp • The Devil's Rejects Unrated Director's Cut 4K (also Saw 2 & 3)
Upcoming deaths: DEI • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Bryan Kohberger, at the hands of his fellow inmates • Chicago Bears' regular season • MSNBC • Lil Nas X
“Here you can read one of the finest quotes about the portal of the topic”
- … this is a portal?
- … the portal has a topic?
- … even if the portal doesn't have a topic, it should still have a pretty nice ass? Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't, that's a portal
{{#css:Uncyclopedia:Portals/styles.css}}{{PortalNav}} <div class="portal-container portal-platonic"> <!-- INTRO --> <div class="portal-row portal-panel"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Platonic Portal}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Intro}}</div> </div> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS --> <div class="portal-row portal-highlights"> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS COLUMN 1 --> <div class="portal-highlights-column"> <div class="portal-panel portal-blurb"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Featured Article|Selected Articles}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Selected Articles}}</div> </div> </div> <!-- HIGHLIGHTS COLUMN 2 --> <div class="portal-highlights-column"> <div class="portal-panel portal-blurb"> <div class="portal-panel-header">{{Portal header|Featured Image|Selected Pictures}}</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{/Selected Pictures}}</div> </div> </div> </div> <!-- BOTTOM ROWS --> <div class="portal-row portal-panel"> <div class="portal-panel-header">More Portals</div> <div class="portal-panel-content">{{Topics}}</div> </div> </div> [[Category:Uncyclopedia Portals]]
Here is the code for an example "blurb" subpage
<noinclude><gallery> File:Article1.jpg|[[Article1]] File:Article2.jpg|[[Article2]] </gallery></noinclude> <includeonly><choose> <option>{{Selected article |article = Article1 |image = Article1.jpg |author = |summary = }}</option> <option>{{Selected article |article = Article2 |image = Article2.jpg |author = |summary = }}</option> </choose></includeonly>
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Art
Peak pretentiousness -
Business
Money, money, money! -
Comedy
The science of funny -
Culinary
Food for the soul -
Film
Enter the Matrix -
Games
Recess time -
Gay
A gay ol' time -
Geography
Get lost -
History
Factually wrong -
Literature
Literally illiterate -
Internet
A series of tubes -
Music
Rock on! -
Politics
Politically incorrect -
People
The people's portal -
Religion
Speak of the Devil -
Science
Playing to be God -
Society
We live in one -
Technology
Breaking stuff easier -
Television
Turn your brain off -
Theatre
To be or not to be -
Video Games
Better than sex -
Zoology
Beware of furries -
Portals
Meta-Portal -
Community
The Community -
Main Page
The Uncyclopedia