Portal:Technology

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The Technology Portal
Techology is some kind of complex mechanism which tellers solely on electricity, physics, and the knowledge of random stuff. Completely full of gears and microchips, technology can unleash an array of powers, like the laser beam attack and the atomic bomb asplosion. Technology is seeking to outrun this world of 'puny' humans with robots and AI. Don't you hate technology?
Featured Article
The changes began immediately.

Foolish humans. While you all spend your time on your worthless television sets and computers, I have been concocting nanobots which shall bring humanity into the future. You shall pay for picking me last in the dodge ball games and stealing my lunch money.

Administer the Nanobots - Aha! I have now injected myself with the nanobots that shall raise me above you pitiable humans and make me something much more. I can already feel the changes occurring in me, making me stronger, more powerful, and filling me with nanobotty goodness! I am closely approaching a state where not even God or Poland will stand in my way! Although Chuck Norris may have a fighting chance...

Human evolves into Transhuman - I can already feel myself transcending you, you humans, and I have asked myself why I was planning on sharing this really super-duper cool formula with you...

Featured Image
Crapmobile.jpg
An ultra-portable solution to long lines at concerts and festivals.
Did You Know...
millions people still use dial up?
the Water Integrator is a computer that runs on water?
you spend too much time on your cell phone?
the QWERTY keyboard was designed to slow down your typing speed?
millions people still use dial up?
Notable Nerds
Carpet Sales.jpg
Steve and Steve peddling their wares.

Stephen Gary Bozniak Wozniak, known as the "Wizard of Woz", is a magical garden gnome with curiously large nostrils who, along with Steve Jobs, is credited with creating the first personal computer, although his expertise really lies in the art of carpet sculpting.

Early Life

Steve Wozniak was born to a family of Keebler Elves, but he hated cookies and biscuit crackers because of his diabetes. Although it was short-lived, in his early teenage years he was inspired to run away from home after watching the movie Pinocchio, but his family eventually convinced him to stay home and pursue his interest in puppets and animatronics through education. After high school, he enrolled in Wyotech vocational school, but later dropped out to follow the Grateful Dead as a Jerry Garcia look-alike.…

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Technology Spotlight
The user-friendly touch-screen interface...

The Poopenheimer Mainframe Mk XII Computer is known as the first ever computer on earth. Legend has it that Julius Caesar and his friend Brutus dropped out of Rome University about 90 BC to pursue their dream of becoming icons in the technology industry. They worked and they worked, meeting many failures. The Poopenheimer Mainframe Mk versions I, II, III, IV, V, VI, VII, VIII, VIV, X, and XI all had major flaws. However, they believed they had a breakthrough with XII.

Inspiration Strikes

One day, while working in their dark downtown Rome apartment, Caesar had a sudden idea.

"Great Brutus, shall we instead of basing our code on the Socratic Method/base it on that which hath preceded: the Altair 8800!"

Quote of the Day

“I do not fear computers. I fear online chatrooms.”

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