Portal:Television

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The television is a telecommunication system for broadcasting and receiving propaganda, pornography, and laundry detergent advertisements over long distances. The term has come to refer to all the aspects of television programming and transmission as well. The Russian scientist and part-time chauffeur Picov Andropov is with coining the word "television" in 1900. Early experiments were based around mechanical television, using rotating pie plates, shoe trees, and candles. The Scotsman Ewan McTeagle was an important pioneer in the invention of mechanical television, especially the coin-operated variety.

Electronic television, which was much more practical and successful in the long run, with a better picture, was based on the cathode ray tube. The English inventor Alan Archibald Campbell-Swinton did important work in 1907, as did Boris Rosing, a Russian scientist and part-time midwife, working independently, however American Philo Farnsworth is credited with the first working electronic television system, which he demonstrated by watching continuously between 1928 and 1929, despite the lack of any programs on.

Mechanically scanned television broadcasts began in 1928, and electronically scanned broadcasts began in 1936. Television was initially monochrome and color was introduced in the 1950s, with colour introduced the following year after much demand in the UK. It also used terrestrial broadcasting through ground-based transmitters. Later, cable television via overhead and/or underground wiring and then satellite television were introduced. More recently in the 21st century, television has increasingly moved from analog to digital technology.

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Being an American Television Producer

JJ Abrams, producer from the Guardian.

A brutal fact of life is that we all want to be producers of something. It allows us to be in the background when people play the blame game in the foreground when the kudos come a callin'. This guide tells you how to articulate your "talent" and use this guide to Being an American Television Producer.

You'll get to be the coolest person on the planet. However, the profession has become increasingly complex as those Ivy League writers seek to downplay your "ideas" (evil schemes) and brutal moneymaking plans that you have. Your only weapon is a mobile phone and the largest say on how the cash is spent. Some of your time will go towards wooing investors and verbally annihilating your studio acolytes. (more...)

Article Credit: Sycamore

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Blasphemy.

Wrath of God Visited Upon Terrible Film and TV Production Studio

ATLANTA, Georgia -- As we know from Christian televangelists, the wrath of God is normally visited upon communities and businesses for their moral degeneracy, or their tolerance thereof. One need only to look at the hurricanes and tsunamis that have recently ravaged the promiscuous and permissive modern-day Sodoms of New Orleans and Thailand, among other places. But God is also wrathful at those who tarnish his message of love and faith with shitty TV shows and movies.

As a case in point, within the past four months God has tried twice to burn down the studios of outspoken Christian film and TV producer Tyler Perry... (more...)

Article Credit: GlobalTourniquet

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Did You Know...

… Neil Patrick Harris hates watching television, unless it's Grey's Anatomy or House MD?

… every time you turn on your television, your high school P.E. teacher cries?

… David Attenborough and Steve Irwin used to be very close friends?

… Tony Danza is actually the boss, but it depends on which witch from Charmed is your favorite?

… if you watch The Facts of Life backwards episode by episode, it unlocks the secrets of the universe?

… Bob Saget auditioned for the role of MacGuyver?

… William Shatner and Henry Winkler often share girlfriends?

… if your mom hadn't let you watch so much television, you'd find Wikipedia more entertaining than Uncyclopedia?

… Wade Wells isn't really a pixie, it's just her haircut?

… this portal needs more did you knows?

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What are you watching, Grandma??? This looks like some juvenile shit, can we watch Matlock?

Image Credit: Nightmare2123

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Highlighted Biography

Oscar at the orphanage.

Oscar the Grouch

Oscar, born in the early twentieth century, has become a well-known face around the popular Sesame Street. But unlike the other monsters, who have a reputation of being happy and friendly, Oscar has gathered a reputation for being grouchy. This begs the question; "Why would a man who lives on the happiest place on earth come off as grouchy?" Well, those who ask this are ignorant, and lack insight into this monster's life. A life which is more torn and twisted than this world itself. If only more people knew his story, they would come to see why he can be more or less angry at times. But sadly, this isn't the case. His life has brought him down and as he withers away from this world which has forsaken him, he leaves with the infamous nickname, Oscar the Grouch. (more...)

Article Credit: Sockpuppet of an unregistered user

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Things You Can Do

Shut up and watch TV, kids!!

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Things You Should Know

Inventors and pioneers: Alan Archibald Campbell-Swinton • Alan Blumlein • Allen B. DuMont • Boris Grabovsky • Boris Rosing • Charles Francis Jenkins • Constantin Perskyi • David Sarnoff • John Logie Baird • Kálmán Tihanyi • Paul Gottlieb Nipkow • Philo Taylor Farnsworth • Vladimir Zworykin

Terms: Composite monitor • HDTV • Liquid crystal display television • PAL • NTSC • TVL • Television licence

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What's On?

HowTo:Find the Remote Control • HowTo:Turn Your Television On • My damn TV won't work • Why?:Is there a hashtag on my TV screen • Why?:Won't this stupid TV work?!? • Indian Head Test Pattern: The Complete First Season • Mystery Science Theater 3000

The A-Team • American Dad • Armenia's Next Top Model • Baldrick • Blackadder • Das Love Boot • Detective Bukkake of the 187th Precinct • Dexter • Ed, Edd n Eddy • Father Knows Best • Frasier • Full House • H.R. Pufnstuf • House M.D. • I Dream of Jeannie • I Love Lucy • Jihad My Ride • Law and Order • Leave it to Beaver • Lost • Mad TV • My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic • My Name Is Earl • Opeth • Oscar the Grouch • Paradise Lost • Pimp My Ride • Pinky and the Brain • Prison Break • Robot Chicken • Saturday Night Live • Scooby Doo • Sex and the City • South Park • Star Trek • The Adventures of Stan Lee's Toupee • The Biggest Loser • The Daily Show • The French Prince of Bel Air • The Larry Sanders Show • The Office (US Version) • The Simpsons • The Sopranos • The West Wing • The X-Files • Torchwood • Touched by an Uncle • Wilde On

ABC: MacGyver • Boston Legal • Whose Line Is It Anyway?

Anime: Bleach • Cowboy Bebop • Digimon • Dragon Ball Z • Elfen Lied • Jojo's Bizarre Adventure • Naruto • Pokémon • Tentacle High • The Big O • Yu-Gi-Oh!

BBC: Antiques Road Rage Show • Britannia Mafia • CSI: Swansea • Doctor Who • Torchwood • EastEnders • Fagpuss • Have I Got News For You • Howards' Way • Merde, She Wrote • Monty Python • Mr. Bean • Life on Mars • QI • Red Dwarf • Teletubbies • The Weakest Link • Top Gear • Wendy Goes Dating • Yes, Minister

CBC: Hockey Night in Canada

CBS: The Amazing Race • Big Brother • CSI • The Dukes of Hazzard • Frasier • Grue's Clues

CRTN: Adventure Time • Captain Planet • Dexter's Laboratory • Ed, Edd n Eddy • Pokémon • Powerpuff Girls • Regular Show • Scooby Doo • Tom and Jerry

Channel 4: Absolutely • Big Brother • Dig and Dug • Put Out or Get Out • Relocation, Relocation • Richard & Judy • Time Team • Top Ten Numbers between One and Ten

CMDY: Futurama • South Park • The Colbert Report • The Daily Show

CW Network: Gilmore Girls • Smallville • Supernatural

Disney: Kim Possible • Hannah Montana • Mickey Mouse • Terrorism

DuMont: Captain Video and His Video Rangers • Stop Squirming and Hold Still

EWTN: The God Couple

Fox: 24 • American Dad! • American Idol • Are You Smarter Than a 5th Grader? • Arrested Development • Bones • The Cleveland Show • Family Guy • Fox News • Firefly • King of the Hill • Mad TV • Married...with Children • Paradise Lost • Power Rangers • Prison Break • Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles • The Adventures of Stan Lee's Toupee • The Simpsons • Saw: The Animated Series • Hell's Masterchef

G4: Happy Tree Friends

HBO: Sex and the City • The Sopranos

History Channel: Inside the Dictators' Studio • World War II: This Time it's Personal

ITV: The Avengers • The Bill • Coronation Street • Sooty & Co.

MTV: Beavis and Butt-Head • Jersey Shore • Jihad My Ride • MTV Cribs • Music videos • Pimp My Ride • Pimp Thy Ride

NBC: The Biggest Loser • Heroes • Hunter • Law & Order • My Name is Earl • Saturday Night Live • The A-Team

Netflix: Black Mirror • Mystery Science Theater 3000- The Return • Red vs. Blue

NICK: iCarly • Rugrats • SpongeBob SquarePants

Nine Network: 20 to 1 • Hey Hey It's Saturday

PBS: Arthur • Curious George • Cyberchase • Mister Rogers' Neighborhood • Sesame Street • Teletubbies

TV Land: All in the Family • The Andy Griffith Show • Bewitched • The Brady Bunch • Gilligan's Island • Hogan's Heroes • The Honeymooners • I Dream of Jeannie • I Love Lucy • Lost in Space • Taxi

BBC • BET • Bureaucracy Channel • Cartoon Network • CBC • CNN • CW • DuMont Network • Fox (News) • HBO • History Channel • Hitler Channel • ITV • MTV • Nickelodeon •

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Anime: Hi Hi Puffy AmiYumi • Inuyasha • My Hero Academia • Naruto • Puella Magi Madoka Magica • Sailor Moon • Samurai Jack • Super! Giant Robot Team-Force • Toonami • Yu-Gi-Oh!

Classics: The Flintstones - Fred Flintstone • The Jetsons - Elroy Jetson • Popeye the Sailor Man • Scooby Doo, Where Are You! - Scooby Doo • Tom and Jerry

Looney Tunes: Animaniacs - Pinky and the Brain - Slappy Squirrel • Bugs Bunny • Daffy Duck • Elmer Fudd • Marvin the Martian • Space Jam • Speedy Gonzales • Sylvester • Tasmanian Devil • Tiny Toons • Tweety Bird • Wile E. Coyote

The Muppets: Beaker • Fozzie Bear • Gonzo • Jim Henson • Kermit the Frog • Miss Piggy • (more...)

Peanuts: A Charlie Brown Christmas • Charlie Brown • Charlie Brown arrested • It Was A Great Blumpkin, Charlie Brown • (more...)

The Smurfs: Get It On With A Smurf • Live as a smurf • Papa Smurf • Smurf attack • Smurfalypse Now • (more...)

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