From today's featured article
This infamous painting made by Dutch Impressionist Vincent Van Go-Go-Power-Rangers, better known as Van Gogh, was made as he visited the world-renowned city of Rome. Van Gogh was considered mentally ill, and he and his fellow insane cellmate Bruce Wayne had been out in the streets and highly intoxicated when Wayne asked Van Gogh to paint Wayne wearing a dark navy speedo and Halloween mask while standing on a building. Later, when he was sober, Van Gogh added a couple of extra touches, such as a weird looking sign called the "Black Ass Bat" symbol.
A year later, in July of 1890, Van Gogh committed suicide by watching a full 6 consecutive seasons of the later run series Full House. His friend Bruce Wayne mysteriously disappeared, leaving a note informing Van Gogh of his departure to Gotham, Canada. However, Dark Starry Knight was later found by Alfred Thaddeus Crane Pennyworth, who, coincidentally, looks exactly like and has the same name as the actor who plays Batman's butler in the DC Batman motion pictures. Better known as Alfred, Pennyworth sent the painting to the New York Museum of Modern Art, where it can be viewed today. (Full article...)
In the news
- Twitter suspends news outlet Palmer Report for telling the truth
- NBC's next live musical celebrates hippies, drugs, nudity, masturbation, and sodomy (Pictured)
- Actress Meghan Markle marries unemployed welfare prince
- Senate votes to restore net neutrality, House says "hold my beer"
- The OG Lois Lane, Margot Kidder, dies at 69
- Teacher Appreciation Week: Fuck you Mr. Dumas, I will never forgive you
- Hasbro buys Power Rangers outright from Saban
- GOP controlled House ends Russia probe for no reason at all
- Mueller Protection Bill passes Senate Judiciary Committee
- Bill Cosby finally in jail, unlike Spacey or Weinstein or...
- First look at Michael Myers mask in Halloween 2018
- Small man with a big footprint: Verne Troyer, Mini-Me, dies
Did you know
- ... that I hear voices outside my room? (Pictured)
- ... that there are at least three other businesses like show business?
- ... that suicide is an answer to every problem, just not a very good one?
- ... that Stan Lee originally conceived the X-Men as a group of post-op transgenders?
- ... that vaccinations and computer games combined make a deadly cocktail for autism?
- ... that a drummer is someone who hangs out with musicians?
- ... that you're more likely to get struck by lightning twice than to discard an irrational fear based on a statistic like this one?
- ... that hitting your kids may be beneficial to their health, or at the very least amusing to you?
On this day
- 1729 - The period is invented on this blessed day.
- 1744 - After much consternation and debate, the comma is created.
- 1758 - Breaking news: colons, exclamation marks, and oxford commas finally invented!
- 1763 - Was the question mark invented on this day? Who knows.
- 1771 - The semicolon is invented; the gentlesirs way of separating clauses.
- 1777 - Some apostrophes wouldn't hurt.
- 1819 - Lawyers from Dewey, Cheatem & Howe copyright the ampersand. Thank God for fair use.
- 1903 - Interrobang‽ Interrobang‽ Kill me‽ Kill me‽ Interrobang‽
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Today's featured picture
From the New Cooler Edition: "And Christ touched the Velociraptor, and the Velociraptor was tamed." Luke 13:37 (NCE)
Image credit: Tshell
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