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Derek Chauvin guilty MINNEAPOLIS, Minnesota -- Disgraced former police officer Derek Chauvin has been found guilty on all three charges in the killing of George Floyd. Read more... Lady Gaga's dogs stolen, returned LOS ANGELES, California -- In February, Lady Gaga's bull dogs were stolen and then returned. Now, a month and a half later, we have learned more about the incident and the perpetrators. The perps have been described as an unidentified, tall, lanky caucasian male (John Doe 1) and an unidentified short, stocky caucasian male (John Doe 2). They were working as henchman for an unidentified caucasian woman with half-black/half-white hair Read more... Amazon to require workers to wear diapers Beginning next week, all Amazon employees will be required to wear diapers. The announcement comes after criticism that overworked Amazon warehouse employees and drivers are urinating in bottles. The company argues its decision will solve the bottle pissing problem while increasing efficiency, as workers will no longer have to pause working to piss in a bottle. The company also announced it would be cutting break times in half, from five minutes to two and a half minutes, since workers will no longer need to use their breaks to relieve themselves. Read more... Biden responds to North Korea's "stink" complaints WASHINGTON -- President Joe Biden responded Thursday to comments made by Kim Yo-Jong, sister of North Korean Supreme Leader Kim Jong-Un, about the new administration "causing a stink at its first step." "I have to apologize," Biden said with a toothy grin. "Look, here's the deal. Major left me a little present when we sent him back home to Delaware after he bit White House security. Bad dog, Major." Read more...		Latest news Toast seen in face of Jesus It's happening again National dogeday ensues, Dogecoin price is pumping, everyone is rich New Cook PVI's released Trolling AI "indistinguishable" from humans Amazon to require workers to wear diapers Lady Gaga's dogs stolen, returned Cyclone Seroja Gives East Asia a Nasty Easter Gift Björk responds to Anti-Asian violence YouTube is removing dislikes East Coast receiving severe weather to end March Stan Marsh presents: 2022 FIFA World Cup Newfoundland battered by tropical storm force winds Tornadoes re-destroy south, but this time spread further north. Biden responds to North Korea's "stink" complaints Kevin Sama not guilty of his warcrimes! Tornado outbreak infects South 2019 & 2020 Atlantic hurricane names retired, the results will suprise you Winter Storm Xylia drops record snow on Denver, whilst most of the nation is much below average temperatures BMI songwriters to get vaccine next; ASCAP songwriters pissed » Older news
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About UnNews An Uncyclomedia project UnNews is a service of Uncyclopedia that spreads misinformation and cons the public into swallowing it hook-line-and-sinker (and worm), by guilefully making it resemble authentic news articles. UnNews stories use satire to ensure the most unfair and biased reporting possible.	This day in news... 23 April 2018: First look at Michael Myers mask in Halloween 2018 23 April 2013: Witherspoon may have Alzheimer's disease 23 April 2011: Many new superheroes appear in Japan 23 April 2010: BP: Oil spill looks "jes' fine" 23 April 2009: Coal is 'world's sexiest mineral' 23 April 2008: Washed Up 70's Rock Band touring to promote new album 23 April 2007: Global warming to transform men into women 23 April 2006: Greek Prime Minister target by perv	Stories with Audio UnNews remembers Phil Spector Strait Country is Rolling Stone's Gayest Album of All Time Tips to avoid the coronavirus North Korea to separate onto their own island Something might happen tomorrow UnNews remembers Burt Reynolds » More | Podcast
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