Lucy, the new Hollywood blockbuster about Scarlett Johansson being the cleverest women in the world, is actually making anyone who sees it considerably less intelligent, reports suggest. The movie, which is based on the fallacy that humans use only 10% of their brains, is so stupid that movie-goers have been admitted to various institutions with impoverished neurological functions.
Leo (July 23 - Aug. 22) - You have spent so long scouring the internet for gorgeous World Cup football babes, that you are now unable to climax unless a woman has a face painted with the colours of a national flag.
Virgo (Aug. 23 - Sept. 22) - Your friends are aghast when you tell them you spend the entire working day spilling seed here, there and everywhere, until you explain that you are a farmer.
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