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Sunday, May 1, 2016, 13:40 (UTC)
UnNews remembers Prince

UnNews is shocked and saddened to learn that legendary pop music icon Prince died Thursday. He was 57 and had reportedly stayed awake for 154 straight hours. The artist once again known as Prince was found unconscious in an elevator, and paramedics were unable to revive him.

What can be said about The Purple One that hasn't already been said?

2016 Q1 recap
UnNews has been so buried in news this year that we barely have time to write about it anymore. Plus, my DVR has been extremely busy, and I've also been busy with chores and other wastes of time that I would never willingly do. So here's a little recap of events we may or may not have covered yet during the first quarter of 2016 (with some spillover).
GoT fan cannot remember anyone's name
A Game of Thrones fan enthusiastically watched last night's season six opener, but was barely able to remember any of the characters' names as she attempted to tell UnNews what had happened. Joanna Corey told us: "Well Jon Snow I definitely know. He seems to be dead still. Those other guys, you know the nice beardy one who got sent away by... by Stannis, he came back and found Jon, and then it was like, is he going to fight the Black Watch..."

Queen waves goodbye, passes crown to Hillary
UnNews:Queen waves goodbye, passes crown to Hillary
Buckingham Palace announced today that Hillary Rodham Clinton will soon be crowned Queen of Great Britain. She will leave for her coronation as soon as arrangements can be completed regarding the location of her e-mail server.
Oxford Dictionary considering replacement for word "mouthgasm"
Oxford English Dictionary, one of the most reputable English dictionaries in the world, has opened a poll on its website stating that they are looking to replace the word "mouthgasm" with any option that "sounds better".
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Your horoscope for today: First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win. Weird first stand-up gig.



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UnNews is a service of Uncyclopedia that spreads misinformation and cons the public into swallowing it hook-line-and-sinker (and worm), by guilefully making it resemble authentic news articles. UnNews stories use satire to ensure the most unfair and biased reporting possible.

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