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From today's featured article - Richard M. Nixon

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Richard Milhous Nixon (January 9, 1913 – April 22, 1994) was an American home stereo-recording enthusiast, known bulk buyer of balaclavas, noted expert on Washington area hotels, and the 37th President of the United States to be frequently referred to as a "Dick".

Nixon rose to political prominence following his election as a Californian member for the House of Representatives, fully embracing all he'd learned from the state that gave the world Hollywood. Namely the hubris, contempt for the law of the land, an aptitude for issuing the least sincere of apologies, and a pathological desire to force fuzzy little animals into any piece of media he released. With his expansion of American intervention in Vietnam, Nixon even provided a second exotic location full of loose women where a man could chase glory, blow all his hopes and dreams and wind up as a chronic alcoholic in downtown Los Angeles.

Nixon's presidential legacy also included opening United States government relations with Communist China, with Elvis Presley, and with the creaking rear window of the 1972 Democratic National Headquarters; the last of these three would lead to his being the first President of the United States to resign from office, after a Senate investigation revealed he had used the resources of the FBI for his personal gain, set the IRS tax men on his opponents, and several other shocking and degenerate abuses of power the average man would do within 5 minutes of being elected President.

Curiously, the one thing Nixon failed to learn from his California upbringing was the ability to act for the American audience. Nixon is remembered for his amoral, sociopathic, and jowl wobbling tendencies, as well as sullying the office of the presidency, which says more about how well the previous 36 presidents had disguised their amoral, sociopathic, and jowl wobbling tendencies than anything else. (Full article...)

Did you know...

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  • ...that a very large number of events, both noteworthy and non-noteworthy, occurred in 1993?
  • ...that the concept of Hell dates back to ancient Egyptians' fear of the Bird-Man God?
  • ...that life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate?
  • ...that in 2001 George W. Bush passed the No Child Left Behind Act, which forbids soldiers in Iraq from leaving their children behind?
  • ...that Wikipedia features DYKs about mosaic floors that were discovered between 1932 and 1939?
  • ...that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?

In the news

On this day...

WHILST MOST COMPUTER USERS CAN EASILY FIND THIS KEY TO TURN IT ONNNNN, WHEN IT COMES TO TURNING IT OFF, EVERYONE BECOMES LOSTTTTTTT

October 22: Int-t-ternational S-s-stuttering Awareness Day and iNTERNATIONAL cAPS lOCK dAY

  • 1889 - AMERICAN TYPEWRITER'S UNION CHANGES NAME TO AMERICAN FEDERATION OF DICTATION TAKERS
  • 1920 NEW YORK TIMES INTRODUCES ITS FAMOUS "NEWS ZIPPER"; WALL STREET JOURNAL CAUGHT WITH ITS PANTS DOWN
  • 1941 - WAR BREAKS OUT BETWEEN ALLIED STANDARD TYPEWRITER KEY BOARD LOVERS AND AXIS OF DVORAK USERS; PUNCTUATION SUFFERERS AROUND THE WORLD CAUGHT IN MIDDLE
  • 1968 - LED ZEP-EP-EP-EPLIN RELEASES ITS CLASSIC ALBUM "LED ZEPPPPLIN IIIII", FEATURING HIS HIT SINGLE "WHOLE LOTTTTA LLLLLOVE"
  • 2005 - W W W W W W W WOR WOR WORLD REC RE REC RECORD STUT ST STUTTER WI W W WIN WINS P P P P P P P P P PRI PRIZE
  • 2006 - CAPS LOCK DAY IS ALL FUN AND GAMES UNTIL CAPS LOCK GETS STUCK AND EVERYONE IS THOUGHT TO BE YELLING.

Today's featured picture

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Some modifications have been made to the newest translation of the Holy Bible. In this scene (often called "Palm Sunday"), Jesus is now riding a raptor. While this was partially made to help make Jesus more accessible to Today's children, the decision was also made because certain Christians didn't want people to be able to say that Jesus was "riding someone's ass" that day. Both scientists and fundamental Christians question the historical accuracy of this account.
From the New Cooler Edition: "And Christ touched the Velociraptor, and the Velociraptor was tamed." Luke 13:37 (NCE)

Image Credit: Tshell
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