From today's featured article
They might tell you it's a vinyl record of In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida. I don't know why they would, but they might.
Did you know...
- ... that John Travolta (Pictured) isn't gay?
- ... that the concept of Hell dates back to ancient Egyptians' fear of sand burning your feet?
- ... that food is probably the most addictive substance known to man?
- ... that I am writing this from beyond the grave?
- ... the muffin man?
- ... that Deus ex machina is Latin for "cop out"?
- ... that the moon is not made of cheese, but magnesium of milk powder, which explains why everyone that ever goes there feels sick when they come back?
- ... the muffin man?
In the news
- Man upset at Trump's remark would never visit countries in question (right)
- Charlie Daniels tweets crazy shit about Illuminati
- Hey, Jerry Van Dyke died
- Should auld acquaintance... something, something
On this day...
- 1492 – Nothing happened. You didn't see anything, so it doesn't count. (pictured)
- 1776 – The United States of America was always unquestionably free.
- 1812 – We had reasonable cause to attack.
- 1847 – The United States retaliated against a Mexican surprise attack.
- 1861 – The United States was always united.
- 1917 – The United States irrefutably wins World War I in late-inning heartstopper.
- 1945 – The United States irrefutably wins World War II in overtime.
- 1965 – The United States irrefutably wins the Vietnam War in seven games.
- 1974 – President Nixon honorably finishes out his optional term of office.
- 2001 – Heavy winds cause the World Trade Center towers to weaken.
- 2003 – The United States irrefutably succeeds on Operation Iraqi Liberation (O.I.L.) in a 4-game whitewash.
- 2005 – It is the policy of this administration not to discuss ongoing investigations.
- 2009 – Global warming? What global warming?
Today's featured picture
The Pontius Pilot is infamous for some functionality issues. One typical complaint is that the Microsoft Crucifixion program often crucified incorrect and important data, such as the Messiah. Thankfully for its users, the file would miraculously reappear two days later after descending to the Recycle Bin, not three as some mathematically illiterate biblical scholars would tell you.
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