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For 100 years the truth about what happened when the RMS Titanic radioed for help on the night of the 14th April 1912 has been believed lost. Now for the first time after some secret research at the Marconi archives, the original wireless log books of the RMS Titanic and her sister ship RMS Olympic, the White Star liner RMS Baltic and the Cunard ship RMS Carpathia have been found. They reveal there was a cover up by Marconi and an attempt to 'straighten' the record to show how heroic everyone was on that night.

Some of this has been known before but was long dismissed as 'anti-Marconi propaganda'. On that day the RMS Titanic had been sending out and receiving private messages for the passengers. In amongst all the verbiage, some ships had been sending ice warnings but the Titanic's wireless operators wanted to finish off sending out the private traffic before midnight. The transcripts start with the Titanic talking to Cape Race, the wireless station in Newfoundland. All messages timed as recorded on the Titanic. (Full script...)

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  • ... that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?
  • ... that if a tree falls in the forest and no one's there to hear it, the tree will begin to sing Nightwish until somebody approaches within earshot?
  • ... that oxygen is a highly addictive drug, with 100% of all users becoming addicted with their first hit?
  • ... that if you put an ear up to a person's leg you can hear them say, "What the fuck are you doing?"
  • ... that Billie Jean was not Michael Jackson's lover but Macaluey Culkin was?
  • ... that half of all American schoolchildren graduate in the bottom 50% of their class?
  • ... that Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A, the sister drug to Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination B, is very effective against Stupendous Tropical Meningitis?

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An exhibit of internet spam before the invention of adblockers

February 22: International Day of Spam

  • 1996 - Need money quick? Need money now? Get a Payday Loan today! It's not like you have a choice you poor piece of shit haha.
  • 1998 - Got bills you need to pay? Some student loans looming overhead? Donate some plasma to literal blood-sucking capitalists.
  • 1999 - There are hot singles in your area! I don't think you can do anything with that information just wanted to tell you.
  • 2001 - Retro fans! Buy a complete box set of every movie and television series released during the 1980s, only $25,999.99! comes in fourteen trucks.
  • 2005 - Buy the last 49,367 Blu-ray discs of Peter Jackson's opus King Kong, I don't know use it as tinsel it's starting to leak chemicals.
  • 2011 - Look like your best self, buy our signature collection of foundation and concealer, made from the ground up bones of the long extinct sea cow.

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