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From today's featured article - More dildos


More dildos is an English sentence denoting a request or demand for additional dildos. It is generally used as an imperative sentence, and frequently punctuated "More dildos!" The sentence implies that the speaker is in possession of at least one dildo, and possibly a small supply of dildos, but considers these dildos inadequate either to the situation at hand or to their life in general, and therefore requires additional dildos. It also conveys that the speaker of the sentence is of higher social standing than the addressee, and therefore he has a reasonable expectation that his demand for additional dildos will be met with additional dildos... (Full article...)

Did you know...

Rod serling.jpg
  • ...that this is just a distraction while we take your car?
  • ...Altaïr has excelled in the tactics of fooling the mentally challenged?
  • ...that Uranus is a gas giant?
  • ...that the life of Jesus Christ contains many allusions to Superman?
  • ...that still lifes are the most interesting paintings?
  • ...that there's more to the 9/11 attacks than the conspiracy theorists would have you believe?

In the news

On this day...

Sophia prefers real sex to telegraph sex.

October 5: National Telegraph Appreciation Day, brought to you by TT&A, your local telegraph provider

  • 1337 BC - The telegraph is invented by Greek inventor Teleos Graphodopoulos.
  • 337 BC - Alexander the Great celebrates 1,000th anniversary of telegraphy by having world's first telegraph sex with his lover, George Michael; boasts of his "long dash."
  • 663 - Meheomod, a.k.a. Mohammed, telegraphs his intentions to destroy all Christian infidels. Celebrations of telegraph's 2,000th anniversary are cancelled.
  • 1371 - Blinding snowstorm snarls traffic, downs telegraph lines in Ming Dynasty's first test of emergency preparedness.
  • 1921 - The World Series was broadcast on the radio for the first time. Telegraph announcer at the World Series loses all fingers trying to keep up. He sues all radio owners making them give him their fingers; He now has over a million fingers on each hand.
  • 1926 - The first error 404 appeared in a telegraph (in this thing called the "internet")
  • 1931 - Before crashing in France, the British airship R101 sends an urgent SOS telegram, until they realize there's nothing connected onto the other end of it.
  • 2001 - Telegraph service finally arrives in Kentucksylvania.
  • 2006 - Google and SUN Microsystems release their thin-client telegraph server, codenamed GTelegraph, to combat Microsoft.
  • 2006 - Western Union cancels telegraphic service, saying "We're gonna try out this new telly-phone deal the kids are so fond of."
  • 2008 - George Michael confessess his love of crack and Tom Cruise markets his new video game.
  • 2009 - Peru runs out of biscuits due to a telegraphic error in the shipping quote.

Today's featured picture


Artist representation of the famous Charge of the Chainsaw Brigade, a pivotal moment on the road to victory which demonstrated the wisdom of bringing Canadian lumberjacks into the war.

Image Credit: Asahatter
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Featured today a long time ago

UnNews:Interview with Nicolas Maduro, featured on 5 October 2013. See the featured version.
UnNews:911 conspiracies explained by a sandwich, featured on 5 October 2011. See the featured version.
Dmitry Medvedev, featured on 5 October 2010. See the featured version.

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