User talk:Black flamingo11

Don't talk to me

Bye.

Old talk pages My first talk page. Ain't it cute. Sophomore. Disappointing. So many memories. And now they're gone.

Rapity rape

Even though I rape at night, sometimes at noon, or at morning's light, I come here now to rape your page, as it drew me like, a torch ablaze. Aleister 23:34 12-1-'12

It's not rape if neither of us want it. --Black Flamingo 23:40, January 12, 2012 (UTC)

I just read this. You've given an entirely new meaning to the term consensual. Pup

UnBooks:My Tedious Day

A user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. By now, the article was featured.

Thank you for voting for UnBooks:My Tedious Day on VFH! -- Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 02:10, January 13, 2012 (UTC)

Past Tense My Friend

Your Exorcist article has this line, "Later that day, a boom-mic operator is killed by an exploding camel." 'Is' should be 'was', but I can't edit articles on your page, so I'm just bringing your attention to it.

And yes I bloody well think it was worthy enough an issue to clog your talkpage with. --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)   17:03, January 16, 2012 (UTC)

It's deliberate, but perhaps misguided? For some reason I felt that commentary on the on-set occurrences should be present tense and the plot for the film should be past tense... not sure why but it seemed to make sense at the time. The article could do with some work though; if you think this is a problem I could change it. --Black Flamingo 17:11, January 16, 2012 (UTC)

Well, reading it again, it does seem to work better that way, I just got what you were going for there. Dis-regard me then.

And yes this may have just been a bloody attempt by me to just talk to you again. Err, I mean...I have to go. *runs* --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)   17:14, January 16, 2012 (UTC)

It will be ok, tenses were hard. I thanked you for the way you'll try to help. --Black Flamingo 17:24, January 16, 2012 (UTC)

The pleasured were mine. --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)   17:32, January 16, 2012 (UTC)

Huffing fix tag pages

I saw you huffed 18 pages of fix tags without saving one or putting any of them on VFD. Have you become one of the people who have taken instant-VFD upon themselves as the rest of us discuss and save and comment about maybe half a dozen pages on VFD over a couple day period? Does absolute pwer brings absolute huffing? My tears are the tears of a clown. On the forum I say that the system is broken, and do so contend. /hangs head in sadness, walks into a bar, orders "Dry ice in a teacup please" "Dry ice in a teacup?" says the barkeep. "Why don't you have a beer!" Aleister 2:04 21-1-'12

HMC 2012

Be the first to sign-up. If you are the first five people to sign up...I will add .5 to your score :) here. Happy Monkeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy !! --ShabiDOO 16:25, January 22, 2012 (UTC)

Hi

Can you do me a favor, well actually, it's the right site decision. I'd like to withdraw my VFH article, Bipolar Girl, from the feature que. An one time IP logged on, voted against it, and way at the bottom of the VFH page wrote "I hate it". So, I realized that it is written very meanly if you were a bipolar woman (which I may be in real life) it would hurt. I don't want to have the site hurt anybody just by reading a page, and I know I consider myself able to lay words on a page in an order which zaps sometimes. So, taking the bipolar among our readers, I would much rather withdraw the page from feature consideration. Thanks. And I liked your last entry on the walk into a bar page, congrats on the storyline! Check out my latest entry, a sick combination of two separate talk page notes that I had just left to people here. It took so long to polish the joke because I was lol so much it was hard to type. Maybe it's not that good, and was a "you just had to be there" moment and I was lucky to be there getting a great laugh while writing a sick paragraph. I'm laughing ol writing this. Please write a couple more. My intent with the page was, and is, to have the best walk into a bar page on the innernests, even if it takes months. Polish polish polish is the key to the game, but you know that. Gleep, and thanks again (still lol at the feeling of writing that joke yesterday. A good chemical memory!) Aleister 22:30 Maniac's first feature day in less than two hours!

Done. 1234 ~ 04:34, 26 January 2012

Congratulations

You and Sog are writers of the year. Well deserved; good work mate. As for your shiny trophy, I don't have it, you need to be able to draw or something gay like that. I just archive pages and write brief messages, there's nothing in my contract about making awards. --ChiefjusticeGameBoy 12:38, February 1, 2012 (UTC)

I hear it's nice to ask the New PotY to 'chop you a fresh troph'. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 14:20, February 1, 2012 (UTC)

Hah. Hah. Hah. 1234 ~ 17:52, 1 February 2012

But actually -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 23:51, February 1, 2012 (UTC)

You guys have very, very bad taste. Now Zombiebaron, there's a man who tasted nice. Like strawberry yoghurt if memory serves me right. Anyway, be seeing ya. --Black Flamingo 00:42, February 2, 2012 (UTC)

Congratulations. You and Sog are like a married couple now. So don't expect sex 5 times a week any more. Nikau 02:15, February 2, 2012 (UTC)

Yay You. Yay Me. Yay it together, naturally - Lionel Ritchie --Sog1970 09:10, February 2, 2012 (UTC)

Congrats to both you jokers, this is a great result and I wish others could have joined your podium. When I won Black Flamingo told me that the award would get me laid, and so I say that to him (Sog gets laid every time he turns around). It's not a bad afro-these-e-whack I can tell you that. You both are fantastic writers, and since it's traditional for co-winners of this award to collab on a article, I look forward to reading it. Congrats again! Aleister 11:20 2-2-'12

Tags

There hasn't been a tagged article saved since Jan. 28. Were all the ones you huffed of for-sure-losing VFD quality? Lots of pages floating away, we've had an entire year of that and it's obvious by the red links that we are losing something here. I didn't know you were a member of the huff-the-site group. Aleister too pessimistic to put the date on

I've been reading through the articles with fix tags and I've removed some tags/saved some articles. I just took the tag off of the mediocre but not terrible "Weird Al" Yankovic this morning, but I have to say that a majority of those articles really have no redeeming value. -- Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 15:41, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

I've untagged the odd few (or waited until someone else did in some cases). Yesterday I moved one into my userspace. And there have been a couple where I've sat there for ages trying to fix them myself only to find it pretty hopeless. I also bought a new jar of gherkins today. Gherkins rule. The articles are actually being deleted fairly slowly so there is plenty of time to peruse the list looking for "savers" if you want to, Al. --Black Flamingo 15:50, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

I know tha, I'd huff almost all of them myself. Yet if a major page, like, say, Yoda (a vital article in universe it is), is up for fix, the people looking at it and deciding if it is to be saved or killed could at least chop it down to a couple of paragraphs and keep the stub. Lots of these have good pics too, and if a pic is only used once and that once is huffed, the pic is in great danger of getting huffed too by editors who love to huff unused pics. The site gets nibbled and cut like that one knight, and now we are VFD'ing templates because they have too many red links. It's all too overwhelming for me, and I must not dwell on it, but am glad you are saving pages. Aleister 15:54 5-2-'12

p.s. You did good, but lots of these pages have a life or death decision on just putting a fix tag on or taking it off, without major editing. I don't have the time or feel like going though every one of the hundreds of pages on the list, and the person tagging them should have made the initial decision of life or death (a one-person VFD in most cases) before a tag is placed. There are hundreds of pages worth instant or tag VFD'ing without a vote, and those are the ones to chop down like a dog, not, for example, Yoda, which is almost feature quality now imnho, and Xamralco and I will do a couple hours work to get it there. Venting, oh no, I'm a red link now too, good bye, sweet wiki... Aleister 16:05 5-2-'12

STOP DELETING THE WHOLE WIKI! SAVE THE WHALES! Mattsnow 16:14, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Seriously, we should calm down on the deleting trigger. Better have an average article than none at all, the site is more complete with those. Not to mention that a great way of pissing away new users is deleting their articles. We want more users, and less articles. lol explain that one to me. Mattsnow 16:18, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Less bad articles = less visitors who think we're shit? And we don't really use fix tags on new articles. I agree that we should be nice to the noobs and make a conscious effort to do so on the rare occasions I encounter them. Anyway, can we get back to talking about my gherkins now? --Black Flamingo 16:29, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

No, since you have become part of the problem your gherkins can wait. And since you are right in the middle of the problem, you can be Spartacus and we could watch. The big big thing which has changed the readers-coming-to-the-site argument is that now we have the random feature button where the random article button was, and that has made all the difference in visitors viewing pretty good pages instead of our average crap. But please look at the pages I've "saved" in the past half hour, these should not have been tagged in the first place as long as any of the random short stuff put up by an IP on speed in 2006 is still around, imnho. Aleister 16:37 5-2-'12

There's an IP going wild on RC. Mattsnow 17:05, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

I think, more articles = more visitors likely to find an article about the topic they're searching. Also, the IP got tired I guess. Maybe he broke his fingers on the keyboard. Mattsnow 17:12, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

My 'pology for coming down hard on you for my own "Ahhhhhhh" emotions at seeing good work gone under. Too much empathy with the writers who wrote the pages. You're just doing what you've been ordered to, ah, taught, ah, beaten into you at your admin initiation party (the scars will heal in six months or so). And the IP at RC can BM. Apologies again. Al 18:17 5-2-'12

Thanks Al, I'm sorry too. Unfortunately we all seem have different ideas on how the site should be run. This is why humans invent gods to make decisions for them. --Black Flamingo 23:18, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

Speaking of drama over huffing...

...one of my babies is the {{Infobox Country}} template, which now has red links because of the disappearance of Capital. Now, I understand Capital was not the greatest article ever, but it wasn't the worst, either. Could you un-huff it and move it to User:Bizzeebeever/To fix/Capital? I think I'll hold it with my tongs and hit its rough parts with my 1kg machinist's hammer until it looks ...dented. Would you like to help, perchance? ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sun, Feb 5 '12 20:15 (UTC)

Restored. Glad to see good writers like yourself actually trying to fix things! And sure, I'll try to help too, although that was one of the ones I failed at trying to fix myself. --Black Flamingo 23:20, February 5, 2012 (UTC)

I rewrote the paragraph on Pyongyang, although I wonder if it's too gimmicky now. Have at it, sir. I shall also procure the services of others. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, Feb 6 '12 6:47 (UTC)

Ok, nice work. Maybe we should go down the "one section on each notable capital" route. I'll see what I can come up with. --Black Flamingo 20:26, February 6, 2012 (UTC)

Was Niggerlodian or however it was spelled bad enough to huff? Couldn't it have been cut back or reverted to an earlier version? I haven't looked at it in a long time. It seems almost like one of the classics though. And did you see this new thingy. Niggers, missing them without knowing why. Aleister 11:32 11-2-'12

Yeah man it was pretty atrocious. If you want to see it let me know (although a cease and desist order has forbade me from showing my penis ever again). Also if you want to see the article I can put it in your userspace. --Black Flamingo 11:39, February 11, 2012 (UTC)

No, but thanks. I still have never cleared out my userspace (it will take a real pen and paper to list the pages, which I should do sometime), so there's enough junk there. Are you doing Happy Monkey? Aleister 11:45 11-2-'12

Yes! Just got my topic! Aw, what the hell am I supposed to write about that? --Black Flamingo 12:15, February 11, 2012 (UTC)

I can't help you with a subject, but I recommend you utilise this image:

Seems boy-related, somehow.—a subtle image whore 23:52, February 12, 2012 (UTC)

If only I hadn't just protected the pages! --Black Flamingo 00:52, February 13, 2012 (UTC)

Your happy monkey topic

Your topic my dear Black flamingo is: Snips, snails and puppy dog tails.

1. Write the article on your namespace
2. I'll be judging the articles based on creativity, originality and cleverness.
3. Good luck, you have until tomorrow night (23.59 UTC, 6:59PM ET) to finish.

(happy monkey has a feeling that you must might scratch his back!!!)

--ShabiDOO 12:10, February 11, 2012 (UTC)

Locked pages

Mr. Flamingo ... could you please unlock RainChilds article. I gave him an exention and advice for formatting, as I did earlier with the other noobs, he (or she) should have a chance to put in an image or two! Thanks --ShabiDOO 01:00, February 13, 2012 (UTC)

Already done, my friend. Thank Hashem that I read Zombiebaron's talk page religiously. --Black Flamingo 01:08, February 13, 2012 (UTC)

I'll thank Hashem after I give thanks to Yorkshire pudding, Jesus while being tortured by Romans, the Prime Minister of Sri Lanka and the all powerful all knowing creator of rubber bands. --ShabiDOO 01:20, February 13, 2012 (UTC)

You're obviously a thankful guy, and yet no thanks for ol' Blackie? :( --Black Flamingo 01:25, February 13, 2012 (UTC)

Jesus Zeus! Yeah...of course you deserve a thankyou. My thanks for you is eternal and ever shining. I love you so much Balck flamingo. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks thanks thanks!!! --ShabiDOO 01:42, February 13, 2012 (UTC)

Stop, stop, you're too kind. --Black Flamingo 10:04, February 13, 2012 (UTC)

My dearest dark bird, would you mind protecting rain child's userpage? He's had enough time to add an image or two. Tah! --ShabiDOO 10:41, February 14, 2012 (UTC)

the forest is lonely

Flamingo, I am a lowly noob that needs help. I started an article and have my main idea in it but I am kind of lost on what I need to do to transform it into a worthy article. I desire your assistance if you can. --Skeetdemon 23:42, February 17, 2012 (UTC)

Yay, I love noobs! I will reply on your talk page sir. --Black Flamingo 00:10, February 18, 2012 (UTC)

You huffed all the Pope Benedict pages?

Huh? I saw where you said you consider Emp. Palpatine or whatever a "candidate" for deletion. Please in God's sake (literally) bring it back and put it on VFD. Thanks.(Pope Benedict XVI still exists. And can I have a copy of Isaac Asimov on my user pages with the complete history, I saw that user DWIII has it as one of his "laughing at" best articles and was wondering if there was a history page matter which would fix it. Thanks again, Aleister 21:57 19-2-'12

p.s. and can I have the December 26, 2011 Steve Jobs page that was killed by Fix tag. We should really have a Steve Jobs page, and if there is something to be carved from it then sobeit. Thanks.

Sure thing, Ming. I'll sort that out for you right now. --Black Flamingo 22:15, February 19, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks. Maybe both of them are garbage, I don't remember either of the pages. One of these weeks I'm going to have to make a list of my useless user pages and clean that mess. Not speaking of Popes, I actually saw that Polish Pope once, in his glassmobile. This new old one, haven't ever spotted him in person. Aleister 22:18 19-2-'12

Here's one and here's t'other. Thanks! I thought I saw him once but it was just Elvis. --Black Flamingo 22:23, February 19, 2012 (UTC)

More admin stuff

I miss the days we collab on frat pages. Sigh. Wanted to mention that the feature que has been very slow this week, and for a couple of the days no new feature was put up. It's empty again today, so maybe you can fill it up for tomorrow or even a few days in a row. You have the power! Sigh. Thanks. Aleister 22:55 25-2-'12

I miss those too, like I miss having ideas for articles. Good spot on the feature queue; I've just featured Somalia for tomorrow, good article... makes us look busy to visitors at least. Shall we have a look at UN:REQ or UN:FIX to see if there's anything we could collab on hmm? --Black Flamingo 23:33, February 25, 2012 (UTC)

Maybe we should do a frat page again, which is to choose one of the top 50 requested, just to keep that string going. Sis boom ba. And you maybe should fill in the entire feature que or at least keep an eye on it, the thing has been haphazard this last week or so. Three or four days ahead usually gives people time to do a final edit sweep of their page, at least in my ex-perience. Gotta run like the wind! Aleister 23:38 25-2-'12

You know that thing we did...

...with popup images? Could you do that to James Bevel? Pup 09:59 26 Feb '12

??Pop him up from the dead? Yikes! BF, the feature que is empty again! Why don't you load it up for a few days, since this keeps occurring almost every day now. Might as well take the bull by the horns and do a dance on top there. Aleister 1:14 27-2-'12

Sorry guys, both these requests are too complex to do from work and I won't be on my own PC much for a few days. Puppy, if yours hasn't been done already by tonight I will try to do it then. Al, I would pester Lyrithya for your request. Sorry! --Black Flamingo 17:33, February 27, 2012 (UTC)

The review I requested - no mad rush. I asked Chief to have a look at it but he seems to be a little busy himself. It'll be done when it's done. As for Ocelot - I'll do a second review on that one sometime over the next 48 hours. I'm impressed that he actually went back and fixed up his error afterwards, and I don't have the heart to undo it on him again. Pup 12:06 01 Mar '12

Cheers Puppy, your reviews are always very appreciated. I'm not doing anything right now so I'll do your James Bevel thing. --Black Flamingo 22:04, March 2, 2012 (UTC)

I was a little flexible in the 48 hour thing. Pup 01:22 04 Mar '12

Hai

You're welcome sir. --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)   21:31, March 2, 2012 (UTC)

Yay. Aw hey where did the cheerful banner go? --Black Flamingo 21:33, March 2, 2012 (UTC)

I dunno! You should let me know when you find it again though. --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)   21:36, March 2, 2012 (UTC)

Hey there it is! Naw it's gone. --Black Flamingo 21:49, March 2, 2012 (UTC)

What a shame. Maybe it'll come back soon. --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)   22:01, March 2, 2012 (UTC)

Votes and fixes

Hello, and thanks for the votes, which are appreciated and are like no money in the bank. And no, I'm not gay (not that there's anything wrong with it), although writing homophones made me gay for a weekend (ah, what a weekend). I saw the James Bevel fixes on the pics, and thanks, yet on my screen they all look the same. Do your changes fix the pics on cells or tablets or something? I've got lots of pop-ups throughout some pages, and am wondering if I should change them... A frat bro from long ago 13:09 4-3-'12

Hey Al! The changes make the links look like real links, with the pop-up thing they've always just looked like random blue text. It also stops the reader from being taken to the image page if they accidentally click the image. I am sorry for mistaking you for one of those gays. I should have known those love letters meant nothing. --Black Flamingo 13:39, March 4, 2012 (UTC)

Pee on your Goddess

The Imperial Colonization Discordianism has been Pee Reviewed. I have no authority anymore to tell anyone to do anything, but check it out anyway! Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Discordianism (2) User:Why do I need to provide this?/sig10 03:32, March 5, 2012 (UTC)

Yo dawg

Just stopping by to remind you that you need to semi-protect featured titles when marking them as featured from now on. (Somalia for one.) Stupid little IPs like to fuck featured articles up with their verbal diarrhea from time to time. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, Mar 5 '12 9:01 (UTC)

Oops, I forgot about that. Thanks for bringing it to my attention. I trust I can count on your vote for Worst Admin of the Year. --Black Flamingo 14:34, March 5, 2012 (UTC)

He's already voting for me. Remember, a vote for Chief is a vote for incompetence across the board. --ChiefjusticeGameBoy 21:32, March 5, 2012 (UTC)

Then I guess I have to vote for Chief. Pup 12:46 06 Mar '12

Category

You may or may not or just might but probably won't want to add yourself to this new category I created yesterday. Or not. Aleister 00:38 8-3-'12

But I don't have a bird's name, do I? --Black Flamingo 11:26, March 8, 2012 (UTC)

? And - 1/2 more point and the cake is lit! Al 15:52 9-3-'12

Haha. Yay I'm the birthday girl! --Black Flamingo 16:01, March 9, 2012 (UTC)

Hello.

Be my friend? -- UserTalkContributions 00:08, March 11, 2012 (UTC)

Friend? What is "friend"? --Black Flamingo 00:13, March 11, 2012 (UTC)

Adopt a N00b

I was, in fact, born yesterday. My mother is too busy feeding me to help me with the slightest bit of programming, parody,or potty training. Would you be willing to adopt me? goo gah. Theswansonator13 (talk) 00:37, March 12, 2012 (UTC)

Wow, I was born tomorrow, or at least I'm hoping to be. I'd love to adopt you, even though you're two days older than me. Let me know if you need any help, and I'll go and take a look at your contributions now. Nice to meet ya. --Black Flamingo 00:56, March 12, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks!

Because of your suggestions, Nuclear semiotics is finally complete! I've worked on this article since July of 2011 (very long hiatus) and now it looks great! Thank you. Any more suggestions?--CameHereInACloche (Talk) 03:49, March 12, 2012 (UTC)

It already looks a lot better, nice work! I'll give it a proper read when I have some more time. When that will be, I have no idea! --Black Flamingo 22:50, March 15, 2012 (UTC)

As I've heard...

...you are now an admin. Congratulations. I have an admin question. If a user has huffed their user pages, and yet if another user has grabbed some of them before they were huffed, can the second user mainspace a page or two which deserve mainspacing. These are my questions one. Thank you for your great admin judgement, like Solomon only with less rulings and more cutting babies in half. Aleister 23:11 Ides of March '12

I mainspaced a user page that was worth main spacing the other day from a retired user. I didn't even think that someone would consider it taboo. Pup 11:15 15 Mar '12

A retarded user? That was nice of you. I would like to mainspace two pages but one article from another retarded user who dropped them over the side. They are pages I've admired in the past, but they needed a clearer link between the first and the second. Something about good Coca-Cola and bad Coca-Cola, neither of you would know of them. We should all list our favorite pages from retarded, and retired, users, or just mainspace them? Ok. Aleister 23:20 Ides of March '12

He said "retired" user. -- UserTalkContributions 23:22, March 15, 2012 (UTC)

I seem to a recall a pair of articles like that being destroyed in a forest fire a little while ago. Pup 11:40 15 Mar '12

Who would do such a stupid thing. A retarded user! Aleister 23:43 Ideas of March '12

I agree. And you'd need a user who has a bit of skill at coding to be able to bring them back from the grave and set up a link between them so that you can show them in three different views: Current version, previous version, and difference. Also it may require someone to grab images that are currently linked into this but hosted off-site to load them onto Wikia servers. But I don't know why you'd bother dredging up the previously huffed pages written by a retarded user. Pup 11:52 15 Mar '12

I know no users who have that type of skill at coding. It is unheard of here, or I have just not heard of it. Once a page is mainspaced anyone can work on it, except IP's and others who have no accounts but float like ghosts through out midsts. And since Coca-Cola is capitalized, and is real, the name Real Coca-Cola seemed to fit uncy's new page, which I have nothing to do with bringing onto the wiki. Aleister 00:24 Ides of March Boxing Day '12

As long as you think the page is good enough for mainspace then yes, go for it. Is the user in question still around? Because you may also want to check with them first. A retarded user, at your service. --Black Flamingo 10:11, March 16, 2012 (UTC)

And what's this about you having a sure nom on VFH, any day now, cake! Aleister 23:15 17-3(UTC)

He didn't bother asking the retarded user. BAN HIM! BAN HIM NOW! Nominally Humane! 01:03 18 Mar

The page had been huffed (huffed away, floated down river), so I grabbed it with a net, mainspaced it, and now you can play with it again! Things go better with coke (or something). Aleister (UTC)

The Pea Buddy Awards

WOW! A brand new UnNews competition and we need you! Either prepare yourself mentally for the severity of the trials (don't sign up just yet, you cheat!) or commit your soul as a judge right now. May the Lord shine his blessings upon thee! Mattsnow 00:46, March 20, 2012 (UTC)

Your wish is my command...

...for on this day no user can deny your requests. This is the law of the 40. Aleister 00:20 21-3-'12

One new message +1

Greetings, Master Flamingo. I am finally here. I have run through endless deserts, swam through oceans, and scaled cliffs of insanity. I have finally completed my journey in order to seek your guidance. You see, I am what the locals call a "n00b." I have been despised through my travels, but I have come seeking your training in order to become a true master. I have learned to forge mighty swords that cut through butter, and written countless essays that I stuff into a drawer and forget about. My skills are unmatched. My sheer intimidation strikes fear into the hearts of the enemy, just as legos strike the bare feet of a twelve-year old. Unfortunately, however, I am in new territory. This is not the land I am used to. It is an interesting land, and I wish to learn more. My skills in my homeland are superb, but at Uncyclopedia, my skills are quite dull. This is why I seek your training, and I present myself humbly before your presence. Milklavalamp (talk) 02:08, March 24, 2012 (UTC)Milklavalamp

So you maggots think you can be Uncyclopedians huh? SPEAK WHEN YOU'RE SPOKEN TO, WORM! Oh wait, you were being spoken to, sorry. I'll head over to your talk page now to drop off your new uniform. Report back here at eleven hundred and thirty six hours sharp! --Black Flamingo 11:34, March 24, 2012 (UTC)

Sir yes Sir! My uniform feels great, Sir! (Besides the shoes, which are a bit small; I wear a size 13) But on a more serious note, I read your post and I have realized that I am far too random in my articles, and I will correct that to make my writing flow more like an encyclopedia. Also, I didn't realize I should talk to people before completely altering their articles, (especially established editors) and that will be corrected as well. Also, I don't know where to find the image you were talking about. I think I might cry. Milklavalamp (talk) 15:17, March 24, 2012 (UTC)Milklavalamp UPDATE: I noticed it was already on my page. I like it. It gives a feeling of mystery, and intelligence, and it will be appreciated. Thank you. Milklavalamp (talk) 15:20, March 24, 2012 (UTC)Milklavalamp

Hey don't worry too much you didn't break any massive rules or anything. Except the rule that you must address all admins as "Your Sexiness" at all times (but I'll let you off this once). I like you already Milky, you remind me of a young me, not much younger though, in fact, perhaps even a few years older. --Black Flamingo 16:20, March 24, 2012 (UTC)

Milk wears size 13 shoes, does he? Hey, so do I! We should get together sometime and loll in the dewy meadows, whilst pressing the soles of our feet together, as I presume 13-year-old girls do...when they're, y'know, not having naked pillow fights. And practice-kissing. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, Apr 9 '12 5:14 (UTC)

I remember when I endeavored to ask BF to adopt me. It was in that same incomprehensible letterings that that young noob has put forth, and I do sayeth sir if that doth not brineth up the fond memories of a time when I and knight BF11 rode together, I his squire and he my knight in shiny armor (No homosexuality intendeith). Those worith the days.

Then I learned how to speak modern english, thanks to BF constantly telling me he had no idea what I was saying but that he liked my wavy hair. Really can't thank him enough for that. --OliOmniOmbudsman 05:50, April 10, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks for the toke

Thanks for voting on my article --Uncle J (talk) 23:41, March 24, 2012 (UTC)

Featured Article: UnNews:Barack Obama proposes legalizing prostitution, pot in effort to balance budget, avoid tax increases

This person wrote an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Ain't they clever?!

---

lol

Can you please restore Category:Articles with excess red links you appear to have deleted it by accident. :D ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 04:18, April 9, 2012 (UTC)

Done and done. That wasn't so much an accident as a "Lyrithya related fuck-up". Thanks for reminding me. --Black Flamingo 11:37, April 9, 2012 (UTC)

Proles

By the time I wrote this, you'd fixed it, like it never happened. Nominally Humane! 01:11 21 Apr

Haha. Thanks for keeping watch :) --Black Flamingo 13:12, April 21, 2012 (UTC)

A dry ice shower

Hello. I don't know if you know that the noob of the moment awards are for anyone who achieves a score of five. So it's not a person against person competition any longer. If you knew that, never mind. How are things? The frat is empty and there's spiders in the windows, I thought I saw that guy who founded it move in the windows the other day, but it was just the wind. Did it leave some stories hanging? I know I was gone most of the second half of 2011 and didn't participate in frat articles. Please point me to any if I could do my part. Someday. I should finish off Stanley Kurbick one of these days, maybe I'll do at least something on that now. /Talks to self, signs off Aleister 17:19 21-4-'12

While you were gone Mattsnow and I briefly dated. He was my muse but it didn't work out. He just didn't share my love of Kubrick, maybe you and I should get back together. --Black Flamingo 17:41, April 21, 2012 (UTC)

Fantastic, the frat got one featured! I'm going to have to read it. And I'd forgotten all about Muse, I've linked it to my link list and will dive into it at some point soon, not this log-in session though. Got to go. No, I don't love Kurbrick, although I enjoyed some of his films, especially Eye Wide Shut and The Shining. Puppy rounded me up to do an article on him when I made the mistake of wandering over and asking him about vital pages. Aleister 17:54 21-4-'12

No love for Doctor Strangelove? I would have thought you'd like that. And 2001: A Space Odyssey may as well be the only movie ever made. --Black Flamingo 18:47, April 21, 2012 (UTC)

No, but I have learned to love the bomb. 2001 was overrated, so slow it was almost as if it were made in space. And by now the only thing anyone remembers about 2001 is the 9/11 tragedy in New York, pity that it stepped all over a slow unrealistic movie with some popcorn munching fast action (I think I ate two bowls of it that day, waiting to see what happened next). I included both movies on the page, of course, but only because they are expected to be talked about when moaning about Kubrick. I sometimes mix the two films up. Aleister 20:36 21-4-'12

Quickly, Flamingo Man!

This struggling pensioner is stuck head-first in a manhole! With your pecs of steel and your tree-trunk-sized thighs, can you help, Oh Mighty Flamingo Man?!! ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Tue, Apr 24 '12 19:43 (UTC)

Per another admin's request

RAHB verified my improvements to Template:ICU in Template:ICU/testcase to be good, but he told me that he needs another administrator to verify this as well before the code of Template:ICU/testcase becomes the real code of Template:ICU. He has tried to ask Zombiebaron to verify these improvements, but Zombiebaron did not say anything. Will you also verify my improvements for me? --IMWT27 (talk | contribs) 12:09, April 28, 2012 (UTC)

Hmm... Sooo.... after 7 days it says the template should be removed or the article should be deleted? Does this change 7 days after it was tagged or 7 days after the last edit? --Black Flamingo 14:46, April 28, 2012 (UTC)

My new ICU template checks if the ICU date is more than 7 days ago. Uncyclopedia:Maintenance/ICU currently sorts expired and unexpired ICUs by checking if the last edit was more than 7 days ago, which is dumber because the edits after the page was tagged {{ICU}} could still not be improvements and the ICU date could still be more than 7 days ago, but there is no way to check ICU date (as in the {{ICU|00:00, April 29, 2012 (UTC)}}) from anything other than the template itself, so I submitted this improvement to Template:ICU. --IMWT27 (talk | contribs) 00:00, April 29, 2012 (UTC)

I don't know, I think I prefer the original one. The whole point is to encourage the author to continue working on it over time, not to say "you only have a week to make a passable article". That's my opinion anyway, sorry. If you want a deciding vote I would definitely recommend Zombiebaron; he lives, breathes and impregnates this stuff. --Black Flamingo 02:14, April 29, 2012 (UTC)

Can I throw in a third suggestion? The seven days from template being placed has value, but change it so that if isn't completed within 7 days it will be moved into the originators user space (if they have one) or deleted (if they don't or if there has been no work done in the intervening days). Tricking the code to show who the last editor was - or in fact the name of the page it will be moved to based upon the last editor - and to show that there has been work in the interim is not a huge stretch. This will push WIP with {{ICU}} out of the main space, but also encourage them to continue working on it. And you must do what I say or I'll steal your lunch money. Nominally Humane! 01:58 29 Apr

Maybe we could either 1) check {{REVISIONUSER}} (which would only be dumb if the last revision was by an IP address, in which case it can't be moved to something like [[User:127.0.0.1/{{PAGENAME}}]] or it is only by the ICU-tagger and not the crator of the article) or 2) check {{{2}}} as the username of the person who created the tagged article (although it would then usually have to be something like {{ICU|09:02, April 30, 2012 (UTC)|IMWT127}}, but if there is no second parameter, don't say it should be moved when the ICU expires anyway) --IMWT27 (talk | contribs) 09:02, April 30, 2012 (UTC)

I'm not sure why RAHB said he had contacted me about this. I can assure you he did not. I do, however, agree with BlackFlamingo. -- The Zombiebaron 02:25, April 30, 2012 (UTC)

Dear BlackFlamingo

Need to ask you something, since they said(actually it was typed) you're an experienced writer here. Should I get (You should be tagged here [I have a weird problem with tagging]) to be my master, be a padawan, learn the ways of a samurai and suddemly be Jedi Knight? In short, I would ask kindly of your tutelage. In a shorter way, can you adopt a me? Sincerely, --Rj2399 (talk) 06:23, April 30, 2012 (UTC)

Whoa you use way too many brackets sir, I (frankly) have no idea what you're saying (to me). Nevertheless I will adopt you as we really need someone to share the rent here. Yeah I said "we". Have you met my room-mate? --Black Flamingo 19:42, April 30, 2012 (UTC)

So, how do I talk to you? I can't seem to understand how chat works. It's a horrible mystery to uncover, just like making fried chicken. P.S. Thank you for your response. Here are two brackets that might help you somehow. [ [ I finally understand how the proper linking works. So confused with the tutorials. --Rj2399 (talk) 03:58, May 1, 2012 (UTC)

Since I've got nothing to do, I thought about asking you something. What should be an article that I would write? I was thinking about spoon. Maybe I should make it now. Nah, maybe later. I'm so noisy. I better shut up before the autorities get here. --Rj2399 (talk) 08:49, May 1, 2012 (UTC)

I think spoon sounds like a wonderful idea for an article. Do it! Do it now! I'm pretty sure the spoon has a rich and interesting history that I am just dying to read about. And what problems are you having with chat? --Black Flamingo 21:01, May 2, 2012 (UTC)

I click the link of that IRC thing and it seems that the page doesn't load. Anyways, I'm actually doing the article right now, but I think I need some time. --Rj2399 (talk) 06:57, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

P.S. About creating an article, how do I put those "citation" things? Thanks (If you ever do reply). --Rj2399 (talk) 07:18, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

P.S.S. Ah, I need to ask about another thing, I'm kinda thinking about naming the contents of my article. I'm afraid of sporking the contents of the article from Wikipedia. Any advice? --Rj2399 (talk) 07:28, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

My mind is experiencing a meltdown. I can't decide whether where to put those that need to be put somewhere. Help! My brain is leaking neurons! It's going to explode any moment now! OK, it finished exploding, no need to worry. But can you have any tips on doing my article? --Rj2399 (talk) 07:52, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

1. Re: IRC - if you going to do webchat you click option 3. Is this what you're doing? It works for me.
2. Re: references - put this where you want the little number to go: <ref>REFERENCE TEXT HERE</ref>. Then create a separate section at the end containing this: <references />. Your references will apppear here.
3. Re: contents - I think you're asking what you name your headers? You can name them anything you want, it doesn't matter if it's the same as Wikipedia. Is that what you're asking?
4. To make a nice even number. --Black Flamingo 10:16, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

1. Re:IRC: Yeah, it works, but I don't know how to use it. Do people chat with those? I can't seem to find a place to type.
2. Re:Thanks about that.
3. Re:Thanks about that again. I think my article is becoming good. I think it might be ready tomorrow, or many years after that. It's almost done but the ratio of picture to words isn't balanced and I need to come up with more sentences. I think I need some advice about that. I'll just inform you when I'm done.
4. Re:Whhaaa? I probably think that we need another header to type our messages. This place is too jammed like jam! – Preceding unsigned comment added by Rj2399 (talk • contribs)

Clicking the freenode web client link should open the log in window, once you've entered your username and done the CAPTCHA to prove you're not a robo you should be in. You're not a robo are you? If not, I dunno. Maybe look into downloading a client. --Black Flamingo 19:23, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah, I did that already, but what do I do once I'm connected? --Rj2399 (talk) 05:27, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

Well, judging from past conversations I've had on IRC, that's where you start typing a load of penis jokes. --Black Flamingo 09:13, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

Is that so? Well I better do some chatting then. I got a question again. Just look below. --Rj2399 (talk) 09:23, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

Is this how to do that adpot a noob thingy? (Also whats a noob?)

I received some messages from a "shabidoo" and a "frosty" that said I should do something called "adopt a noob." Shabidoo was very helpful, but I think Frosty may have been some sort of artificial intelligence Bot thingy. Shabidoo also mentioned something about digging up and having intimate relations with my deceased grandmother. Her name was Agnes. She was 92. ...Anyways, Your account was the first name on the adopt a noob list. Am i accidentally joining a cult? sincerily, two dashes four tildas.

--Cheeseheadted (talk) 04:35, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

Judging from that pic on your user page you already are a cult, and we need to join you. Aleister 10:26 3-5-'12

I always wanted a cult following. I have replied on your talk page, sir. --Black Flamingo 19:27, May 3, 2012 (UTC)

I shall follow you to hell and back, for you are a better man than I am, Gunga Din. Aleister 21:01 3-5 (UTC)

And I love you, Mulan. --Black Flamingo 09:15, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

Some moar space for dancing messages

I also was thinking about making the article fork after making spoon and well, I gave the spoon somewhat possible content that I was going to give to fork. Can you give some wise words on this. Anyway, I'm nearing completion of my article which you can view about tomorrow or the year 2021. Also, how do people put a horizontal line in the middle of words. I used to know what this is called but I forgot. --Rj2399 (talk) 09:32, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

Just look at the code. The secrets are in the code. Ya ha ha. Aleister 10:45 4-5-'12

Who are you? Or even, what rrrr you? Thank you very much your highness. --Rj2399 (talk) 12:41, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

OK, I'm almost finished, but I need to ask about something, how do dates get featured on the main page? I added a certain date for something in my article, but how can it go there when the time has come? --Rj2399 (talk) 15:42, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

...Dates? You mean the fruit or the measurement of time? I don't think we feature either of those. What do you mean? --Black Flamingo 16:07, May 4, 2012 (UTC)

What I mean is the "On this day" part of the main page. How do I make a certain event go there, since I put an event on my article. --222.127.35.129 05:01, May 5, 2012 (UTC)

Oh that. It's here. Please read the editing guidelines before adding to it. I tried to look at your spoon today but I couldn't find it. All I could see was my own face distorted and huge. Where have you hidden the article? --Black Flamingo 11:53, May 5, 2012 (UTC)

Oh, so I don't need to give the link to the date? Well actually I haven't saved it yet. Now it's finished. Look at it now. -spoon- --Rj2399 (talk) 02:50, May 7, 2012 (UTC)

Hellppp

I just nommed a page by CrabPope, but the coding seems to be off (it's a second nomination, so I put the name in the slot, maybe that was it) and it doesn't show up on the que. You can find it in recent changes under A Victorian Gentleman's Guide to the Trivialities of Courtship. Can you assist on this wasteful matter? Thanks! FIXED! Iz did it myself!!! Aleister 12:00 5-5-5

So... you got me out of the bath for nothing? --Black Flamingo 12:04, May 5, 2012 (UTC)

Yes, I've heard that you have a bell which summons you when a message is left. You should drive over to that town on VFD that everyone lives near and purchase an anti-bell bell, which rings with opposite sound-waves whenever the other bell starts to move, thus canceling out the noise of the first bell. Aleister 12:08

I dunno, last time I rang two opposite bells at once all the dogs in the neighbourhood went crazy at the noise. --Black Flamingo 12:35, May 5, 2012 (UTC)

I would like to bring your attention to this forum

Forum:Vote to De-Op Lyrithya Nominally Humane! 03:20 07 May

Davey2010

You banned my name but not my ip address .... Try again :)

Yo!

Why aren't you logging in? Are you dead? If that's the case, I'll cry so bad. *Tears falling slowly, very slowly, so very slowly until an hour passes by. --Rj2399 (talk) 04:05, May 12, 2012 (UTC)

No son, I was always here. See that picture of me standing next to Chronarion in 1927? I will never leave. Anyway, how can I help ya? --Black Flamingo 10:04, May 12, 2012 (UTC)

Have you already read my first article? --Rj2399 (talk) 08:42, May 22, 2012 (UTC)

One more thing, who's Zombiebaron? --Rj2399 (talk) 06:49, May 23, 2012 (UTC)

Your first article? No, not yet. Is it spoon? If so I will take a look at some point today. You wanna meet Zombiebaron? I know Zombiebaron personally. I can introduce you to Zombiebaron. Zombiebaron. --Black Flamingo 09:05, May 23, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah, it's spoon. Could you write a review about it in Pee Review. It's there so look at it, and Mr. Mattsnow put it there for me. Oh, and I would like to meet Zombiebaron. That would do me a favor since that would add to the growing population of the people I know here, and it is currently 3. Who is he anyways? --Rj2399 (talk) 11:39, May 23, 2012 (UTC)

This is a question, please answer it.

What words need to be formatted "bold" like this in an article. I know this is a weird question, but please do answer it. It's for my next article 'portmanteau'. I've seen in its history that you huffed it a long time ago, but it has no reason whatsoever with me doing it. --Rj2399 (talk) 03:04, May 25, 2012 (UTC)

How do peeopl here enlarge a mathematical equation(LaTeX)? --Rj2399 (talk) 07:41, May 25, 2012 (UTC)

Can there be a horizontal line in the middle of words in a mathematical equation(LaTeX?) something like this?

--Rj2399 (talk) 08:16, May 25, 2012 (UTC)

Or should I use the picture instead? --Rj2399 (talk) 11:09, May 25, 2012 (UTC)

The most fricking thing happened! I clicked on a link while doing my article and clicked another link and clicked another link, then I realized it my editing page was gone! Then I clicked "back" on my web browser. It said something about some form re-submission. I then re-entered the URL of the page and it said it was huffed. But I clicked the back button again (I have an addiction with clicking the "preview button")and refreshed the page. WAZZZZOOM! My work wasn't erased! Do you know where I'm getting at? I should like thank God you know. Well that's a story I'd like to share to you. --Rj2399 (talk) 13:31, May 25, 2012 (UTC)

Dood! U Ded? --Rj2399 (talk) 01:40, May 26, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah sorry, I've been dead for the past week. I'm a lot better now though, thanks. Okay, let's try to answer some of these questions... I'm pretty sure you can't strikeout with the maths text thing; you'll probably have to upload an image. You can make the text bigger by using the <big></big> tags, but obviously that won't work for an image. Also, I would love to do the pee review, I'll try to get it at some point this week if I'm not too busy. Sorry I haven't been on in a while. I've been really busy with my band and other assorted stuff. Zombiebaron is a cool guy, this is everything you need to know about him! --Black Flamingo 14:32, May 27, 2012 (UTC)

Header

It's been a while it is there, and as the host of the comp (well we were 2 at first, but that's another story) I really think this could be huffed or changed to a "vote for VFH!!!" thing. Mattsnow 21:34, May 12, 2012 (UTC)

Je suis á toi! --Black Flamingo 12:33, May 13, 2012 (UTC)

Greetings!

Thought I'd let you know about a new feature we've got on recent changes, called "patrolled edits". If you do any cleanup on RC, patrolling can be a useful tool. Essentially, it "approves" edits by any users who are not in the auto-patrolled user group (IPs, newbies, etc). It makes it much easier for multiple people to sweep up, as they don't have to keep checking the same pages. You can read about it here. Also, if you'd like to patrol multiple edits at a time, or just patrol edits directly from RC, I've got a special javascript which I whipped up recently. You can use it by putting importScript( "User:Bizzeebeever/scripts/patrol.js" ) into either your uncyclopedia.js or monobook.js, depending on which theme you use.

If you already knew about it, then please disregard this message. Cheers. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sun, May 13 '12 23:50 (UTC)

Hi how are you? --Black Flamingo 00:12, May 14, 2012 (UTC)

Who, me? I'm f***in' golden. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, May 14 '12 0:18 (UTC)

Golden? Wow, I'm happy for you. That's basically the best metal there is. I'm not even fucking tin. I'm like, limestone or some shit. --Black Flamingo 00:24, May 14, 2012 (UTC)

Don't sell yourself short. You're platinum. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Mon, May 14 '12 0:32 (UTC)

Ah, "don't sell yourself short"; the first thing they taught me in male prostitute school. --Black Flamingo 16:34, May 14, 2012 (UTC)

Zombiebaron. Awesome.

Never seen someone so handsome! How much is his book printed? I would love to have a copy. I also read the sequel, Zombiebaron's Trip To Asia. It was such an awesome experience. Does this means that it has a double pack? Anyway, what's your band's name? Do you have an album? Do you have music? Do you have band members? Do you have instruments? And why don't you have a list of your articles? I would be happy to read your articles! Tehn I wolud vadnaliez tehm afetrawrds! (Hope you didn't understand that! Wahaha!)--15:11, May 27, 2012 (UTC)

Yeah Zombiebaron is a living legend. I don't really enjoy whoring my stuff out but my articles are all here I think. Vandalise away, you'll probably only improve them (although that's not to say I won't ban you anyway). So far all my band has is this slightly crappy EP, but we're working on more stuff right now (hence: busy!) --Black Flamingo 16:45, May 27, 2012 (UTC)

Who's Elmo? That Sesami Street dude? And why does his minions remind me of something?(branches)--01:07, May 28, 2012 (UTC)

Elmo is the guy from Sesame Street yeah, although he recently moved; the rent there is ridiculous. --Black Flamingo 20:03, May 28, 2012 (UTC)

So you're like Big Bird or that guy that lives in the trash can? Oh you know me --10:06, May 29, 2012 (UTC)

I used to live in a trash can but I had to move. The rent there was ridiculous. --Black Flamingo 11:27, May 30, 2012 (UTC)

Did you know...

...Socky nommed one of your user space page for feature? Nobody told you yet, so maybe wander over to VFH to see which one! Aleister I'm not here

Ah, thanks for pointing that out, and for voting on it. Obviously you all have terrible taste! Socky is a foolish fool of the fooliest proportions. --Black Flamingo 16:40, May 28, 2012 (UTC)

Inquiry

I'd like to inquire about changing my user name. as I understand the admins and or sysops are able to do this? If so I'd like to have that done as soon as possible, or at the nearest convenience.

Thank you kindly.

--Meed Sheaffer (talk) 18:28, May 28, 2012 (UTC)

Only staff members can change usernames. If you want yours changed, talk to Sannse. -- Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 18:31, May 28, 2012 (UTC)

Actually Sannse doesn't check her talk page so much these days, probably best to use Special:Contact, which goes straight to her email inbox. Enjoy your new handle! --Black Flamingo 20:00, May 28, 2012 (UTC)

Need your help

What kind of humor does this article rely on? I'm trying to finish up the review made for it and admittedly need a little help.---   TALK What's it like to be a heretic? 22:10, May 31, 2012 (UTC)

Hmm... kind of humour? I'm not sure what you'd call it. I suppose it's quite matter-of-fact, and quite dry. It juxtaposes this matter-of-fact style with really dark material, quite successfully at times too. I hope that helps! --Black Flamingo 22:16, May 31, 2012 (UTC)

Thank you.---   TALK What's it like to be a heretic? 22:22, May 31, 2012 (UTC)

Pee

Hey, thank you about reviewing my article. I think I'm going to edit it now. But before that, what are the parts that are good? I need to know so I won't accidentally remove them. Oh, and about the article, I didn't put the "Arctic" in Jesus and that something about "Abraham Lincoln" and "Jesus". I think Mattsnow did, probably when I made him read my article. Also, I read a lot of featured articles when I was doing Spoon. That's why it took me a long time to finish it. Featured articles kinda give me some kind inspiration and that's also the reason why I limited my pictures. I thought that if I put a lot of pictures, it would look bad. But I was wrong. So anyway, thanks again. Insert name here --06:03, June 1, 2012 (UTC)

I found out who made the edit about adding "Arctic" into Jesus and "Abraham" and "Jesus" reintroducing it into metal. Some IP address named "75.249.152.8". Oh you know me --06:54, June 1, 2012 (UTC)

Can repetition of pictures be also funny? --Rj2399 (talk) 09:42, June 1, 2012 (UTC)

Yes repetition can be funny sometimes, this article springs to mind. Thinking back now, I really liked the mundane descriptions of what spoons are for, like were you talk about teleporting, and where you say that, before spoons, people used to eat ice cream and soup with their hands... things like that. --Black Flamingo 10:13, June 1, 2012 (UTC)

Now I'm confused. Should I change the teleportation stuff with transportation? You told me to change it in the review. I really intended it to be teleportation. But I changed it it my revision of spoon (Not final). Should I change it back? This is my Name --13:17, June 1, 2012 (UTC)

I'm thinking about changing the first picture with something else. Should I? --Rj2399 (talk) 13:32, June 1, 2012 (UTC)

I like the content of that part, I just think "transport" is a better word than "teleport", and the way it is written can be quite confusing. And yes, I would change the first image. I personally like quite generic pictures as opening images, but that's just me. Just do whatever you think is best my friend; the review is just my opinion. --Black Flamingo 13:52, June 1, 2012 (UTC)

GermanPug

• Thanks. Can you look at this?--GermanPug was here! SPRICH, FREUND! 14:21, June 2, 2012 (UTC)

Okay, I've looked. Oh you want my opinion? Well, it's a little bit short, and most of the jokes don't really go beyond simply insulting the guy. Also, there are a lot of grammatical errors and quirks that make it difficult to follow. Hope that helps. Let me know if there's anything else you need. --Black Flamingo 12:45, June 3, 2012 (UTC)

Sorry for the grammatical errors, i'm from Germany, you have to unterstand. I want to amke it better, see there.--GermanPug ► SPRICH, FREUND! 13:18, June 3, 2012 (UTC)

Okay, well same again with that article I'm afraid. I recommend you read some of our featured articles, for an example of well-written, funny English. You could always use a spelling and grammar checker as well (like the one in MS Word). I would do some illustrative edits myself but I'm a little busy and I genuinely can't tell what you're trying to say in many parts of the articles. --Black Flamingo 12:10, June 4, 2012 (UTC)

Amy Winehouse

I want the Amy Winehouse article deleted now. Its so fucking unfair, most other musicians articles on this wiki practically kiss their balls except her, hers is just abusive. No one thinks of her as a bad singer either, its not like she's even like Justin Bieber she is a fugure like Jim Morrison or Janis Joplin. She has not been ever thought of as a bad singer and furthermore the article's only beef with her is that she did drugs. Well whoop de fucking do who cares, Jim Morrison, Freddie Mercury, The Beatles, Marc Bolan, David Bowie, The Stones they all did drugs and they all shagged about why is everyone such a little tight arse about Amy Winehouse doing drugs. Hell the stuff she did was less than them she never tried to or killed anyone like Sid Vicious and Ozzy Osborne for fucks sake. Delete it please or re write it as an article kissing her ass. She was a very talented musician who was respected and loved by the likes of Adele, The Rolling Stones, Etta James, Debbie Harry, David Bowie, Queen (Except Freddie of course who is sadly dead) she deserves more than this.

Hey there. I'm afraid I'm not really supposed to just delete things on a whim (despite how fun it is). I agree the article isn't great. If you have the time I would much prefer to see you try to improve it rather than delete it outright. Alternatively, we could always put it to community vote here. --Black Flamingo 00:01, June 8, 2012 (UTC)

Whoa. Déjà vu. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 00:11, 8 June 2012

It's a glitch in The Matrix. Quick, put your sunglasses on! --Black Flamingo 00:16, June 8, 2012 (UTC)

He was also complaining on the Amy Winehouse talk page. I have to say, a lot of people do not like that page, especially after her death. Why couldn't they just change it if they feel so offensive. Who knows. Maybe I can fix up, as it is in a bad state.---   TALK What's it like to be a heretic? 00:45, June 8, 2012 (UTC)

If these are the types of anguished "complaint emails" Wikia is receiving on our behalf, I'd like to be the first to point out that Wikia should be hit in the motherfucking faces with a skillet. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Jun 8 '12 6:33 (UTC)

M&M

Expired ICU. Shame, because this is literally my favourite book.

Hah. Hope you enjoyed the article, then.

But what was I supposed to do about the ICU (imposed by someone unfamiliar with the novel)?

The main complaint was "not enough text." I'm sorry -- those jokes don't just write themselves, y'know? I can't simply produce more on command. So what's the alternative -- add some unfunny filler crap?

Also, conversely: "too many pictures." Well, all the pictures were jokes (see below), and NOT filler.

For the record, some less-than-obvious silliness you and/or others may have missed:

• picture 1 is actually "Jesus Brought Before Pilate," with Pilate being the female-looking one.
• picture 3: "charming" applies in both senses ("cute" and "exercising magical powers").
• picture 4: a Jesus Christ Superstar quote (Pilate to Jesus: "Since you come from Galilee, / Then you needn't come to me. / You're Herod's race; / You're Herod's case!")
• picture 5: depending on which translation you've read, you might or might not know that Ponyrev's pseudonym ("Bezdomnyi") means "Homeless." Plus, of course, he's a very bad poet, so...
• "Hella Good" is the name of a No Doubt song. (OK, everyone knows that.)
• "What Is To Be Done?" is the title of a novel by Chernyshevsky, and also of an agitprop article by Lenin -- hence, "overused."
• "little Judas" was Lenin's occasional nickname for Trotsky.

Yes, of course I'd like my article back. Thanks.

Stumbo (talk) 05:39, June 10, 2012 (UTC)

Done and done (and done). Thanks for coming here and explaining your jokes by the way, it might help to infuse the article itself with a similar level of clarity, and to generally just, uh, have more text (helpful advice, I know). I'm glad to see you're going to continue with it. --Black Flamingo 10:37, June 10, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks... But the article still isn't officially up, as far as I can tell. (And no, one can't explain the jokes in an article itself!) Stumbo (talk) 03:17, June 12, 2012 (UTC)

Follow the link Black Flamingo provided. The page is in your userspace now. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 04:31, 12 June 2012

But I want it to be in the official space. -- Stumbo (talk) 05:24, June 13, 2012 (UTC)

Okay, work on it a bit more though first or someone will probably just tag - or worse, delete - it again. A bit more background information about the novel might be a good addition if you're stuck for ideas, and obviously get some more jokes in there. I strongly advise you both to enter the PLS by the way. --Black Flamingo 19:28, June 13, 2012 (UTC)

A bit more background information about the novel

If they want that, they can go read the damn thing, or at least consult Wikipedia. I thought the purpose of this site was satire, not education.

get some more jokes in there

If I can think of more, I'll add them. As it is, though, there are are more jokes in there than in at least 90% of the articles on this site.

someone will probably just tag - or worse, delete - it again.

Then so be it; I won't say a word, this time. Conversely, you should start a movement to kick out -- or, at least, downgrade -- folks who comment on subjects they're ignorant of.

Stumbo (talk) 06:02, June 17, 2012 (UTC)

1. Yes satire is its primary purpose, but what is wrong with education? Many of my favourite articles are educational and funny in equal measure. Why would somebody go and read it if they don't even know what you're talking about? Anyway, the main reason I suggest this is because the article is very short and encyclopaedias - which we are a spoof of - generally have these sections.
2. Okay cool, I hope you do. Aim high!
3. Sorry, I'm not sure what you mean by "folks who comment on subjects they're ignorant of". --Black Flamingo 11:05, June 17, 2012 (UTC)

Why would somebody go and read it if they don't even know what you're talking about?

They shouldn't. In order to get all the jokes, they need to be very, very familiar with the original; otherwise, it's a waste of time.

I haven't read, say, Pride and Prejudice, so I'm not going to bother reading an article about it -- never mind think myself competent to comment on one.

Stumbo (talk) 04:32, June 18, 2012 (UTC)

I think you are being a bit negative Stumbo. The skill of any writer is to draw you into an article even if you haven't read the work they are spoofing or making fun of. Perhaps people will not 'get all the jokes' but some will and others at least few. That doesn't matter, this isn't a fan site. Quite often I have come across an article here and then checked on Wikipedia for more information if possible. Sometimes the 'joke version' makes more sense than the one you find there or on other websites. Broaden Your Horizon will be the sequel to Curb Your Enthusiasm. --RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate) 06:35, June 18, 2012 (UTC)

The skill of any writer is to draw you into an article even if you haven't read the work they are spoofing or making fun of

I've gone over the other articles in the http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Category:Books category (at least, the ones I'm familiar with); none seem to follow your paradigm. So should they all be flagged, too?

Stumbo (talk) 04:53, June 27, 2012 (UTC)

Hey Stumbo. If you think something needs work feel free to tag it with a construction tag, yes. There are always plenty of articles that fall under that description, although since I quit writing those numbers are dropping. --Black Flamingo 20:06, June 29, 2012 (UTC)

Sorry, (1) I meant http://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/Category:Literature. (2) I wasn't knocking those articles; my intended point was that they're OK (despite not adhering to your rule), and so's mine. Stumbo (talk) 06:24, July 2, 2012 (UTC)

OK, I'm getting kinda sick of this.

If you don't think that my article is (much) better than the average one in the above category, just delete it. (And shame on you.) Otherwise, please promote it to regular article status, with no flags.

(I won't ask again; I'll just wait a few days, and if neither of these actions has been taken, I'll delete it myself.)

Thanks,

Stumbo (talk) 09:45, July 8, 2012 (UTC)

Ah, sorry Stumbo I genuinely didn't see your earlier message there. I am also sorry to say that I too am getting kinda sick of this, and by "this" I mean you coming to my talk page repeatedly to argue with me despite the fact that I have 1) restored your article, B) told you that you can move it back into mainspace if you want, 3) warned you, however, that someone else may tag it due to how short and lacking-in-laughs it is D) offered advice on how you can improve it, and 5) generally been polite and handsome through the whole conversation. Why so hostile? Why can you not just take the advice of people who have been writing and editing this site for much longer than you have and improve your article, or hell, even write a new one?

Anyway, the article is back in mainspace now. I recommend you work on it further and try to be nicer to fellow editors in future. Next time I will not be this lenient. --Black Flamingo 10:55, July 8, 2012 (UTC)

Your mum is never that lenient. I quite like it. --ChiefjusticeGameBoy 16:03, July 8, 2012 (UTC)

She always said I was too... soft. --Black Flamingo 20:39, July 8, 2012 (UTC)

Manic Depression

We should write an article on it. Or you should. I feel as though your writing style would greatly assist on its humour, as the material I cam up with last night was utter crap. I realize this request and message violate amendment three of your restraining order against me, but I would still love to know how you feel about this. --OliOmniOmbudsman 16:15, June 21, 2012 (UTC)

Unfortunately I feel it's a subject I know all too well. Just kidding. Or am I? In any case let's do it, humble hombre. --Black Flamingo 00:42, June 22, 2012 (UTC)

Your place, or mine? --OliOmniOmbudsman 17:07, June 22, 2012 (UTC)

I'm already over at your place. Your wife makes delicious pie by the way. --Black Flamingo 19:56, June 22, 2012 (UTC)

The inevitable return of the person that you know.

Hey, sorry if I need this inevitable return. But I did it! I had an inevitable return. Anyway, have you looked at spoon even if I did the last revision of it ages ago. Please point out again those that I need to change, and comment on it on my talkpage. I did only some edits that are above the page, so sorry if I ever bother you. I've been busy, so can you give me a headstart to return here once again. Your dear apprentice, Yoda 08:16, June 23, 2012 (UTC)

Yay, you should return more often! I will take a look at your spoon soon, sadly I have been rather busy too. Have you written anything else lately? --Black Flamingo 17:16, June 23, 2012 (UTC)

I was working on portmanteau, but I think it wouldn't be funny. Can you check it out for me? Then I got busy and had no more time to make new ones. But I was thinking of making GTA San Andreas and Vice City someday, and all my ideas for these are already in my head. I'll make them someday, someday, yes, oh someday. Darth Potato 06:28, June 30, 2012 (UTC)

Cool, looks good. My advice would always be to keep writing. Each article will probably be better than the last, until you hit your peak, then it's all downhill. Ah, the career of an Uncyclopedian... I can just about see you on the other side of the hill as I come down the other side! --Black Flamingo 13:04, July 1, 2012 (UTC)

That made me sweat my eyes out. Boohoo. Sniff, sniff. Anyway, would this image look good on my first article? And what looked good? The new revision of spoon or portmaneau? Luke Potato 13:35, July 7, 2012 (UTC)

Both! But I don't get why it's Sony? --Black Flamingo 23:22, July 7, 2012 (UTC)

You're Winner!

Poet Lowrate

 

This person is the winner of the Poo Lit Surprise, which they won for their article: Ask Jeeves

Thanks to the subjective whims of some rank basement dwellers, your article won the PLS! Enjoy this template as consolation for your wasted, wasted time. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 23:50, July 2, 2012 (UTC)

Hey man I won fair and square. FAIR and SQUARE. Well, maybe less of the fair, but I definitely won square. --Black Flamingo 22:05, July 5, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks for the laughs

Your PLS article was great. Look forward to reading your final cut. I will happily nominate it. --ShabiDOO 19:45, July 3, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks, go for it! Incidentally I have no idea which one you mean. --Black Flamingo 22:06, July 5, 2012 (UTC)

Avenge my death. By the way...you really ought to finish up the deep space nine thing you were doing. I laughed a lot...deep hard laughs. --ShabiDOO 23:57, July 5, 2012 (UTC)

How would you like to participate in a forum I've created?

Forum:Are you a Matthlock? User:Matthlock/sig2 20:58, July 5, 2012 (UTC)

Nah, but I wish you the best of luck with it. --Black Flamingo 22:08, July 5, 2012 (UTC)

My pee review

Yea, the one I did like two weeks ago for your Ming article. I apologize for it's uselessness. I hadn't realized the importance of Flash Gordon to the entire plot until recently (strangely enough, every since your article, I keep seeing Flash Gordon references everywhere. Especially in that movie TED. Have you seen it? Don't. Anyways...). Yea sorry about that. I guess I'm off form a bit. --OliOmniOmbudsman 02:59, July 21, 2012 (UTC)

UnTunes:Blame Wikia!

Sung to the tune of "Blame Canada". It's a brilliant idea, and as you are the first in the list on UN:AA, you should do it. Nominally Humane! 01:25 22 Jul

Blame Wikia, blame Wikia, 'cause on Internet Explorer all the pages show up blank. Blame Wikia, blame Wikia, or if all else fails blame Spang. Is that how it goes? I don't remember so well. Who's next!? Also I can't log in! --Black flamingo11 23:10, July 24, 2012 (UTC)

It's the new Wikia model. All admins are auto-banned for life. The only people who can delete pages are IPs. Welcome to the future. Nominally Humane! 11:50 24 Jul

They didn't mess with Olipro, though, luckily for them. —84.198.56.170 00:01, July 25, 2012 (UTC)

IP is part of Olipro's name and nature. Nominally Humane! 12:18 25 Jul

BOOOOM?

Sorry for the late reply, I was fighting against the Sith these past few weeks and I just found out that Darth Vader was my father. It gave me a boner. So about the picture, what brand should I put there? Jedi Warrior 02:19, July 29, 2012 (UTC)

ED

I'd like to do an article regarding my little experience with what happened to me because of Encyclopedia Dramatica and it's users but I can't find a way to edit it or anything. Can you please help?

Monstermaster12 (talk) 03:05, August 10, 2012 (UTC)

The disambiguation page is locked. Encyclopedia_Dramatica_(Website) is open to edit for auto confirmed users. To become auto confirmed you need to be here around a week or so, and make over x amount of edits (100 or something). In the meantime you can work on a "new" version of it in your namespace. If you want to copy the existing content there you can "view source" on the original and paste it there. Have fun, and {{welcome}}. Nominally Humane! 03:28 10 Aug

I would tread carefully, if you continue to attempt to incriminate ED, the users that have harassed you will find out about anything you post here and then use it against you. You need to stop this crusade against the users on the ED Forums and just walk away from the problem and there will be nothing left for them to incriminate you for. Just a suggestion. ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 08:08, August 10, 2012 (UTC)

I know, that's why I wanted the little article I did to be deleted. Monstermaster12 (talk) 08:27, August 10, 2012 (UTC)

Well now it has been. ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 08:28, August 10, 2012 (UTC)

DS9

Are you going to take it on again? I really love this article. Are you interested in someone having a go over it? --ShabiDOO 14:26, August 18, 2012 (UTC)

Pee Review

We need your PEE! Good day loyal PEEING member.The management was wondering if you had noticed the state of the toilet recently. We appear to have developed something of a blockage, and wondered if you might have a plunger handy. Possibly you are one of the rare PEEING members who does actually do regular reviews, in which case please flush this message immediately, otherwise... It's time you reviewed something you lazy bum!

--ChiefjusticeGameBoy 18:11, August 20, 2012 (UTC)

Davey2010

Hi,

You blocked me ages ago, Anyway sadly got a new IP,

So was wondering If you could ban this IP & remove my old one - 94.193.170.151

I'll only continue blanking so might aswell be banned ....

Have a great day!

Kind Regards Dave 188.220.243.213 03:52, November 26, 2012 (UTC)

You're weird. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 06:25, 26 November, 2012 (UTC)

How? 188.220.243.213 06:43, November 26, 2012 (UTC)

You want youself banned, weird enough. Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 07:10, 26 November, 2012 (UTC)

Adopt a Noob

Hi,

My name is ChinaTownGypsie and I would very much like to become a funny Uncyclopedia editor. I feel I am funny enough but I have no idea how to write and how to make it professional looking. I am not sure how Adopt a Noob works but I would appreciate it greatly if you would adopt me as a Noob. It took me about an hour to work out how to do this so any help would be appreciated.

ChinaTownGypsie

ZOMG

WELCOME BACK HERE YOU SON OF A BITCH! Where you been!?!  ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sun, Nov 17 '13 4:55 (UTC)

Seconded. I thought you'd left. I also joined in the time you were gone, so you won't know me, but anyway it's good to see an old user return. Also, you found the fork, yay. – Llwy-ar-lawr (talk • contribs • logs) Uncyclopedia is a community site that anyone can contribute to. Discover, share and add your knowledge! UncyclopediaUncyclopediaIllogicopediai:fr:LogimalpediePaudurapedyjaFrithchiclipeidUncapaediaAbsurdopediaScotypedia 05:03, 17 November 2013 (UTC)

Maybe he just saw a spam page, came to delete it, and dissolved back into the night, ghost-like. Stupid ghosts. Shh. We better not talk to him anymore. It might scare him off. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sun, Nov 17 '13 5:05 (UTC)

I just came by to read, was wondering how many people would say hello if I made a long-awaited edit. This won't do. Won't do at all. See you in 2 years motherhubbard! --Black Flamingo 20:48, 22 November 2013 (UTC)

Bastard. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Nov 22 '13 21:00 (UTC)

You should do something for the Aristocrat's Turkey Day Ball. Yeah. Just because. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Fri, Nov 22 '13 21:01 (UTC)

Well... he's gone again.  MagicBus 21:11, 22 November 2013 (UTC)

'Something' you say. Well I don't think I can bring myself to write or judge, how about I just get really drunk. -Black Flamingo 16:42, 23 November 2013 (UTC)

Oh cool you're back again. – Llwy-ar-lawr (talk • contribs • logs) Uncyclopedia is a community site that anyone can contribute to. Discover, share and add your knowledge! UncyclopediaUncyclopediaIllogicopediai:fr:LogimalpediePaudurapedyjaFrithchiclipeidUncapaediaAbsurdopediaScotypedia 18:46, 23 November 2013 (UTC)

Oh Flam, you're back <3 You should remember me because I've been active when you were, except you do not remember me and I'm going to take another slice of bread Cat the Colourful (Feed me!) Zzz 18:56, 23 November, 2013 (UTC)

If you can't write or judge, you should at least stand on the sidelines and masturbate furiously to all the entries. That would assuage my anger. My anger needs assuaging, by the way. ~ BB ~ (T) ~ Sat, Nov 23 '13 20:11 (UTC)

ih ~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) 23:51, 23 November 2013 (UTC)

Good to see you peeking in from time to time. You should do that more often. Just stay out of my windows. -- Simsilikesims(♀UN) Talk here. 04:47, 24 November 2013 (UTC)

Uncyclopedia:AAN/Adopters

Hi, just letting you know that since you don't seem to be active these days I've moved you from the list of active adopters to the list of inactive ones. If you should become active again, you may want to move your name back to the active list. – Llwy-ar-lawr (talk • contribs • logs) 19:19, 16 Mar 2014Uncyclopedia is a community site that anyone can contribute to. Discover, share and add your knowledge! UncyclopediaUncyclopediaIllogicopediai:fr:LogimalpediePaudurapedyjaFrithchiclipeidUncapaediaAbsurdopediaScotypedia

Re-feature queue

If you want, you can go to Uncyclopedia:Re-feature queue/Nominate and pick one featured article that you wrote to be re-featured. You can also pick three features written by someone else to re-feature. -- Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 18:24, 17 November 2014 (UTC)

Happy Monkey Competition 2021

Hey its HAPPY MONKEY TIME 2021 (Feb 21-28). Your favourite writing competition where we write articles on one another's suggested topics. Go ahead and sign up because the more users we have competiting the more ridonculously fun it is. If you don't wanna write you can sign up to judge! Sing up here. Remember it's not about writing a sure fire VFH article, but pushing the limits of your originality and creativity and spitting out an article on a topic you had never thought about writing before. Also...Shabidoo will love you forever and owe you like a zillion favours for it. He will literally do anything to please you if it means you participate. Happy Monkey Farts!!! ShabiDOO 15:37, 10 February 2021 (UTC)

It's beginning to look a lot like…

See you next year! The first annual *Kiss My Ass* Holiday Competition has officially ended for 2021

Up for grabs is the coveted Clark Griswold Award for Holiday Cheer. Who will be crowned Holiday Victor?

Judgement day is upon ye!

Seasons Greetings!

It's that special time of year. A wonderful time for friends and family to rejoice in gaiety. Not you! You usually spend all of your hard-earned money on gifts for them, and now you just want to hibernate until your finances recuperate. Well, here at Uncyclopedia, entering our newest competition won't cost you a penny — Sign Up Today! (pretty please)  –     (ooh!) (aah!) ...·º•ø®@» LEG CUN GUN DUN 15:01, 13 December 2021