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“Literature must rest always on a principle, and temporal considerations are no principle at all. For, to the poet, all times and places are one; the stuff he deals with is eternal and eternally the same: no theme is inept, no past or present preferable.”

– Oscar Wilde

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In the news

God Dammit, Bill Fucking Murray!

Chevy Chase, Maryland to change name to Bill Murray (Pictured)
Donald Trump farts
A Saucerful of Secrets is 50 years old! Also Michael Jackson
Growing belief that flat earthers do not exist
Rush Limbaugh ties too much brain behind back, goes into cardiac arrest
Ice cream is racist
UnNews logo on articles now links to UnNews main page
Opinion: Trump signs executive order to end border separation that HE started
Fishermen reel in M15 Nuclear Bomb
Rapper XXXTentacion shot and killed at 20
Trump uses Space Force to distract from border separation scandal
Why your horror nerd friends are unusually excited
Why your European friends are unusually excited
Roseanne reboot gets canned after Roseanne can't keep her racism down to a 6.5
Twitter reinstates news outlet Palmer Report after brief suspension
Phil Hartman: Twenty years later
Twitter suspends news outlet Palmer Report for telling the truth
NBC's next live musical celebrates hippies, drugs, nudity, masturbation, and sodomy
Actress Meghan Markle marries unemployed welfare prince
Senate votes to restore net neutrality, House says "hold my beer"

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Did you know

... that the entire army of Liechtenstein consists of 3 soldiers? (Pictured)

... that the bow-tie is an aphrodisiac worn by male humans which instantly increases the sexual appeal of the wearer by 16%?
... that every time you shoot yourself in the head, someone somewhere in the world dies?
... that the song "Harder Better Faster Stronger" by Daft Punk is a giant "That's what she said" joke?
... that pillow fighting is a violent trend among the world's pillow population, and must be stopped?
... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven?
... that every single day, we breathe enough air to continue living?
... that at some point, hanging in there just makes you look like an even bigger loser?

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On this day

July 12: Feast of Peter and Paul (Catholic Church), Feast of a Thousand Lasagnas (Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster) (pictured)

1870 – In the midst of high school, and without the convenience of LiveJournal, Oscar Wilde expresses his angst and sorrow by composing the poems Poems.
1917 – The The Bisbee Deportation occurs as vigilantes kidnap and deport nearly 1,300 minors from Bisbee, Arizona. The children are forced to wander the Arizona desert in search of shelter and sustinence.
1993 – The sale of Chex Mix is officially banned in the United States after disturbing trends regarding improper usage come to light.
1998 – Icelandic megastar Björk is arrested for allegedly causing several thousand dollars worth of damage to an Icelandic bed and breakfast. She is later acquitted after testifying "I am the round and the square, the ocean is sea."
2004 – Harold And Kumar finally make it to White Castle.
2008 – The United States Presidential race heats up, as Senator John McCain reveals his platform and begins intensive campaigning.