HowTo:Main Page

Featured HowTo

HowTo:Be an adult

Hi kids! I'm Mr. Radek, guest speaker from the American Enterprise Institute, it's a conservative think tank. It's one of the reasons why your teachers can't join a union. Ha.

An adult is someone who's reached an age where they're expected to know better. Can anyone here tell me what age that is? The age when you start to know better? Eighteen? I heard someone say twenty-one. Twenty-nine? Forty-three? Jesus Christ. Well, those were all decent answers, but I'm hear to tell you you're all wrong. There is no age. You're still insecure and filled with self-doubt, only now you have to work and pay taxes and know better, and after that you die. I'm going a little off script here kids, so bear with me. (See more...)

Recently featured HowTo's

• Become An Hero
• Take the Road to Ruin
• Eat mushrooms properly
• Win a game of Tic-Tac-Toe
• Score a Second Date
• Build a Paper Empire
• Reenact History
• Write a novel
• Become Stupid in 21 days
• HowTo:Be a Detective
• Be A Damsel In Distress
• Write an Uncyclopedia article without reading any of the rules or directions or manuals or policies first
• Nail a glass to a wall
• Make Black Meta
• Pretend You Have an Archenemy
• HowTo:Go into the light
• Beat a Polar Bear in a Fight
• Make a Four Year Old Laugh
• Love Your Neighbor as Yourself

Tip of the Day

“ Also, don't be surprised if you go to jail for what society deems "gross", "horrible", and "Satanic": it's all part of being an ant keeper... and an ant "watcher". Would you like to know more? ”

Create your own HowTo

Please read our guide to making HowTos before writing. Or not, maybe just wing it.

Search HowTo

HowTo

Main

Our newest HowTo's

Newest

• Become a famous and good lier
• Pass Go and Collect $200
• Eat Tide Pods
• Create a Cult
• Gain weight
• Reduce popularity of the internet
• Clickbait Properly
• Keep Americans out of your country
• Install Windows Vista
• Get online
• Noscope Some kids online
• Learn Esperanto
• Lie to a Select Committee
• Participate in Society
• Get Laid by Playing Guitar

Featured on Main Page

• Install a ceiling fan without getting your dick stuck in it
• Be an adult
• Fry an egg
• Repair a broken smartphone
• Cure homosexuality
• Know if you're right brained or left brained
• Wash the Dishes
• Be Russian
• Teach a six-legged lame man how to jump rope
• Beet off
• Meet women
• Make your own Large Hadron Collider
• Be German
• Insulate your loft
• Make it drink

• Archive
• See more...

HowTo tools

• List of HowTo templates
• List of all HowTo pages
• List of featured HowTo's

Sister Projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.

• 
  UnNews
  News on crack
• 
  Uncyclopedia
  The content-free encyclopedia
• 
  Undictionary
  Best left unsaid
• 
  UnTunes
  Noisy things
• 
  Games
  Ways to waste away
• 
  HowTo
  Like Ikea without the pictures
• 
  UnBooks
  Content-free books
• 
  Unquotable
  Useless misquotes
• 
  Uncycloversity
  No student loans
• 
  UnPoetia
  Dreams deferred
• 
  UnDebate
  Debate the irrelevant
• 
  UnScripts
  We ruin stage too
• 
  Why?
  Because
• 
  UnReviews
  Hack frauds
• 
  UnCommons
  Doesn't work
• 
  UnVoyage
  Armchair travel