HowTo:Abduct children
Your IP is 17.172.224.47. Your current location is 1100 South Ocean Boulevard, Palm Beach, FL 33480, USA, your name is GAETZ, MATTHEW and your dick size is 0.75 inches
What the hell?![edit | edit source]
The Police is on its way to your location, asshole!
What the fuck is wrong with you? Did you really think someone would actually be enough of an evil sleazebag to teach you how to abduct children, you sick fuck?
Only one way to make it all go away*[edit | edit source]
Send 3 billion dollars IMMEDIATELY to the creator of this Uncyclopedia article.
*Sending any amount of money to the creator of this Uncyclopedia article will absolutely NOT prevent any form of investigation by law enforcement officers, nor will it guarantee immunity from prosecution. If you have abducted children in the past, or if plan to do so in the forseeable future, you are human scum who deserves to be put behind bars.