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pirates do it till you walk the plank.   | 
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This user feels a strong compulsion to kill every single God-damned Commie bastard that they meet.
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Dieser Benutzer ist ein offizielles Mitglied Der Unwehr. Wir sind hier zu die Schwachen töten und die Starke bauen. Sieg Heil! 
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This user enjoys indiscriminate pillaging.  | 
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This user should not be trusted.  | 
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This user has been on Uncyclopedia for   17 years, 5 months and 23 days.
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This user can also be found elsewhere on the internet.  | 
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This user uses  Uncyclopedia as their  primary point of reference.  | 
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This user likes  llamas, and rides them on a daily basis.  | 
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See? Look at them. They really like the  llamas.  | 
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No, seriously. That's them there, on the  llama.  ← See?  | 
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USB!!!!!11  | 
NO, REALLY TRULY REALLY!!!!   | 
USB!!!!!11  |  
   
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Stop scrolling down, and admire the  llama.  It's much more interesting than the actual userpage, trust me.  | 
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ubx– crapload  | 
This  user has a crapload of userboxes.  To see more of them, go to  UN:USB.  | 
ubx– crapload  |  
   
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What, you don't believe me?  Fine, see for yourself.  Don't blame  me when you die from lack of  llama.  | 
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I collect userboxes as if they were trading cards, hoping that they may be collectors items worth something in the future.  
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This  user is easily distracted by anything  shiny.  | 
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Color  | 
This user likes random colored userboxes.  | 
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This userbox is a filler, and therefore looks  ugly.  | 
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This user would be a professional  procrastinator, but they can't be bothered.  | 
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This user is a  Gamer and therefore creepy.  | 
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This user is  right-handed. In  Latin, they would be Dexter.  | 
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This user reserves the right to completely screw up their edits life by spending too much time on Uncyclopedia.  | 
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This user hates Windows Vista and recommends the total destruction of all existing copies.   
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This user  hates you and everyone you care about.  | 
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This person helps reduce over-population by killing people, thus helping the environment.  | 
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This user's future is so bright, they've gotta wear shades.  | 
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