Main Page

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
(Redirected from HowTo)
Jump to: navigation, search

From today's featured article

Catcherrye.jpg

J.D. Salinger was this guy, he was a writer I think. He wrote this goddamn book, it was about baseball or bread or something. I can never remember that sort of goddamn thing, if you want to know the goddamn truth. I don't care much for school and don't pay attention that often. Except I do like English. So I guess it's kinda weird that I don't remember.

Anyway, this goddamn Salinger guy likes to go by his first two initials as his pen name, just like my brother D.B., who's actually my favorite author. Old D.B. I suppose he's still prostituting himself in Hollywood living in the height of his goddamn glory with the rest of the goddamn phonies. I hope to hell not, really. I should probably give him a goddamn buzz. (Full article...)

Did you know...

Henryhigh.jpg
  • ... that individuals born under the sign of Gemini are often flammable and vulnerable to bear attacks?
  • ... that Uncyclopedia is riddled with subliminal messages? DRINK COCA COLA
  • ... that Phonics (pronounced Pa-hon-iks.) is one of the deadliest and most addictive drugs on the streets? It is said to get children "hooked" in four weeks or your money back.
  • ... that 90% of all video game high scores are set by one guy called "AAA"?
  • ... that Cup Stacking is a real sport? No, really.
  • ... that en passant is actually French for "inventing new rules as you go along?"
  • ... that the average human male between the ages of 18 and 42 has thought about sex with Brad Pitt at least once?
    • ... and if you haven't before you just did now?

In the news

On this day...

Now that's what I call a Force Choke.

December 17: Sea Turtles Choking on Star Wars Memorabilia Day

Today's featured picture

Ahmadinejad-jihad-my-ride.jpg

Popular Al Jazeera reality series "Jihad My Ride" features, among other Muslim celebrities, Mahmoud "I-Wanna-Jihad" Ahmadinejad taking normal automobiles and making them "The Bomb".

Image Credit: RadicalX
Vote on this image - Nominate new image - View all featured images

Featured today a long time ago

John Travolta, featured on 17 December 2012. See the featured version.
Saskatchewan, featured on 17 December 2010. See the featured version.
Matter, featured on 17 December 2009. See the featured version.
UnNews:Liberal insurrection heroically crushed, featured on 17 December 2007. See the featured version.

Uncyclopedia on Social Media

Follow Uncyclopedia across social media to stay updated on the latest wiki happenings.

Like us on Facebook and get yelled at by your racist uncle!
Follow us on Twitter and get stale memes delivered straight to your feed!
Do people even use this anymore?
Like! Subscribe! Consume!
Join us on Discord and browse our collection of problematic emojis!
Make friends around the globe, without editing a single page!
Buy our CS:GO skins or we kill you.
Not to be confused with /r/cummingonfigurines
Overcome your crippling social anxiety with the support of our Skype group!

Uncyclopedia's Sister Projects

Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects.

UnNews:Main Page UnNews
The news source on crack
Uncyclopedia Uncyclopedia
The content-free encyclopedia
Undictionary Undictionary
The ick!tionary of all things best left unsaid
UnTunes UnTunes
Where noisy things can live and prosper
Game-Logo notext.png Games
Another way to waste time
Gorillatrans.gif HowTo
Instructions and guides for anything and everything
UnBooks UnBooks
Content-free books
Unquotable Unquotable
Useless misquotes galore
Uncycloversity Uncycloversity
If it makes sense, we don't want it
UnPoetia UnPoetia
Poetry for people who hate poetry
Undebate logo.svg UnDebate
Debating all the irrelevant issues
UnScripts UnScripts
We can ruin stage and film too
Why.svg Why?
Don't make me explain it to you twice
UnReviewsLogo.png UnReviews
We'll tell you why things suck
Uncyclomedia Commons notext.png UnCommons
Broken media repository
UnVoyage!!!.png UnVoyage
Content-free worldwide travel guide