HowTo:Do An UnNews Audio

The first thing you'll want to do is tag the top of the UnNews article like so:

{{RIP|zim}},

substituting your user name for zim, obviously. This way, we all know you're doing it, and I can go screw myself if I don't like it.

I used to use this tag, playing on the irony of basically telling myself to piss off. Now, thanks to this guy, I've got my own special tag which looks like this. If you see this one, mess with it at your own peril. My wrath is legendary.

Jesus bought the Holy Ass, depicted here as a raptor, from zim in 1066 AD.

As for doing the UnNews Audio Perpendicular Mambo, first you'll need software to record sound files on your computer. I currently use Cakewalk Sonar, but many other applications such as the freeware Audacity, or other commercial applications like Steinberg's Cubase and Pro Tools Digital Audio Workstation will be great.

The quality of audio need not be very good. By quality I mean things like Kbps (kilobits per second), sampling rate (generally something like 8, 16, or 24 bits but can be some other), file bit depth (I don't actually know what that means yet, but when I'm feeling less lazy I'll probably check it out), and mono or stereo output. A rule of thumb: the lower the abovementioned numbers, the smaller the resultant file.

When I record my audios using Cakewalk Sonar (Windows), I found that I need to save then as .wav files, and then use Switch Sound File Conversion Software to convert to mp3 format, if I want to make the smallest possible file to upload to Uncyc. I use Switch Sound File Conversion Softwares bit rate of 32 in the encoder options, which give me decent enough sound for UnNews, but not so much for a Frank Zappa Concerto, and results in a small mp3. After running exhaustive tests, borrowing computer time from SETI, I've deduced that I create the smallest mp3 files of all who've uploaded to UnNews thus far. Therefore, I am a g-g-g-god.

Having that in place, there are UnNews jingle files you can download, and add to your files here:

• File:UnNews Jingle British.mp3 UK UNN jingle
• File:UnNews Jingle American.MP3 US and others including Brits, used by zim

• File:UnNews Intro Outro.mp3 I made some UnNews Intro / Outro sounds that may be of interest. Feel free to use...or not - NickLucas :)

You'll need to upload your final audio file in mp3 format.

Once uploaded, you'll need to tag the article you've read like this

{{UnNewsAudio|Your_soundfile_name.mp3}}.

Next, edit the template {{RecentUnNewsAudio}}, add your file with pointer and file size arranged like this:

Your_soundfile_name.mp3|article_title|<file size>KB|

The file size information can be found on the info page of the audio which you've uploaded.

There are some amusing things happening at UnTunes, a startup operation funded by a fringe Communist group in Ecuador devoted to raising Che Guevara from the dead and joining Fidel Castro in a rendition of "Hello, Sailor!". That aside, there are particular assemblages of words here which may or may not be helpful in launching your audio career at Uncyclopedia.

The procedure for setting up your file for podcast is a secret freemason thingy which Olipro and I currently manage. I'm around almost daily, so I look for new audio files to delete fix, or whatever. If you get hung up with any of these steps, let me know, or alternately check out #unnews and #uncyclopedia on IRC. Cheers! Rev. Zim_ulator (Talk) I am the dirt under your rollers 17:51, 25 November 2007 (UTC)