User talk:Matt lobster

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UnSignpost Home Delivery
Your #1 source for Cajek ban jokes!

Previously....And before that. Even earlier. Really early on.



On the style for this page, see also my comments to Bizzeebeever. Spıke ¬ 00:13 25-Dec-12

Hi, Matt![edit]

Wiki, much? ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngTue, Dec 25 '12 1:10 (UTC)

I here you. --mAttlobster. (hello) 01:29, December 25, 2012 (UTC)
Said the Deaf Man. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngTue, Dec 25 '12 1:36 (UTC)

"Not safe for work" templates[edit]

(Of which Aleister claims there are nine or ten) Here is the background: Those of us working RecentChanges have in the last week encountered a "template Nazi" Anon, perhaps a prude, slapping these on any page he thinks needs warnings to the reader. He is not adding Funny but adding Clutter. Aleister made the point that, as the entire website is "protected" by a Content Warning to new users, individual pages don't need additional tagging, part of his continuing argument that prior restraint plus censorship is Wikia overkill. Separately, in general I dislike templates that advise the reader how to interpret stuff they have not yet begun to read. Spıke ¬ 00:49 31-Dec-12

Genuine thanks (what other kind is there, huh?)[edit]

Mate, I am really glad to get your vote, which means just as much regardless of the outcome. Much appreciated!!! Happy New Year!!!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 13:33, Jan 1

Drop your pants and grab the eggnog! It's the UnSignpost.[edit]

 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Wed, Jan 2 '13 13:20 (UTC)

UnSignpost sez, "Give Pease a Chance!"[edit]

 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Jan 11 '13 5:30 (UTC)

Unsignpost - 20130119042144 gibberish asdf[edit]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 04:23, 19 January 2013

Collab sometime[edit]

Do you think you might be interested in a collab sometime?-- Kamek siggy.png ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 14:07, 21 January 2013 (UTC)

Definitely, what on? mAttlobster. (hello) 14:37, 21 January 2013 (UTC)
I actually wanted some help with Suddenly, Slender.-- Kamek siggy.png ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 14:55, 21 January 2013 (UTC)

Unsignpost - 20130124050125 gibberish asdf[edit]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 05:02, 24 January 2013

Unsignpost - 20130131002159 gibberish asdf[edit]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:24, 31 January 2013


You're cool. — Capitalis quadrata Y.SVG (talk) (contributions) Feb 1 2013 20:43.

Unsignpost - 20130207013217 gibberish asdf[edit]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 01:34, 7 February 2013

It is the day of USP love, Valentine’s Day[edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 01:33, 14 February 2013 (UTC)

Crikey! It’s a rare, wild UnSignpost![edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 00:35, 21 February 2013 (UTC)

Surprise, Motherfucker, USP[edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 03:50, 28 February 2013 (UTC)


Why the fuck would you even say that? That really made me mad. It isn't even close to VFD material.-- SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 20:36 3.01.13 20:36, 1 March 2013 (UTC)

>.> Er, sorry. It's just, I don't really think it is VFD material. And I truly think you don't either. I know, it's a little bit slapstick and short but I guess it is either like or don't like it. RAHB said he'd think it'd do well on VFH so... Sorry man. SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 21:57 3.01.13
Come on whizzster. What's the rush. You've got the beans when you let them grow. mAttlobster. (hello) 23:52, 1 March 2013 (UTC)
Idk... I don't feel like anyone reads my articles actually.  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 23:53 3.01.13
Keep up the action mAttlobster. (hello) 23:58, 1 March 2013 (UTC)
I am. I'm just not gettin much support..  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 00:17 3.02.13

I thought I heard the Imperial March. USP time, everybody![edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 20:35, 7 March 2013 (UTC)


Can you give me your opinion on The Virginity Thief?  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 17:30 3.09.13

It's completely random. What's the concept of the article? Why did you nominate it? mAttlobster. (hello) 16:35, 10 March 2013 (UTC)
A Man Getting Hit in the Crotch 800 Times got featured, but I just thought making a criminal sex bandit film article would be funny, its called fiction lol  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 02:58 3.11.13

Can I have some salad with my UnSignpost?[edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 11:43, 14 March 2013 (UTC)

happy monkey[edit]

Happymonnkey 2013.png

It won't be the same without you. --ShabiDOO 23:44, 18 March 2013 (UTC)

People like the UnSignpost because it’s hot! It has the best graphics and everything. Marcus, USP! Step yo’ game up![edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 02:26, 21 March 2013 (UTC)

UnSignpost’s BONER TIME![edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 21:53, 28 March 2013 (UTC)

This isn’t an April Fool’s Day Prank! This is the UnSignpost![edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 18:23, 4 April 2013 (UTC)

In Soviet Russia, Tanks on you![edit]

Thank you for your vote and nice words on the St. Peter's Square unnews. There's always a dream that someone in Italy or thereabouts will read it and organize a square occupation (occupy the squares, man!), but it's fun fantasizing about anyway. I find myself liking this Pope, but who knows if he's going to move off his personal life things and carry that over into his decisions. Give me a few minutes and I'll bring over the talk page of the occupy unnews, it has a full size pic of that monster the popes have their public audiences in front of. Creepy. Thanks again! Aleister 20:00 4-4-'13

UnSignpost Time, Folks! I repeat, UnSignpost Time![edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 00:34, 11 April 2013 (UTC)

UnSignpost, late and lazy![edit]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 01:39, 19 April 2013 (UTC)

The 2 Days Tardy USP![edit]

{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/20130425} } SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 01:03, 27 April 2013 (UTC)

Paul Shane[edit]

For some reason I remembered that you had that video on your user name page. RIP Leverage (talk) 08:44, 17 May 2013 (UTC)

Week-old news two weeks late: The UnSignpost![edit]

 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Tue, Jun 11 '13 2:32 (UTC)

UnSignpost is back[edit]

And enjoy the news! Anton (talk) 18:40, 6 July 2013 (UTC)

The UnSignpost: a brilliant new format but less news[edit]

The UnSignpost
Th-the m-m-most con-confident new-Newspaper in a wh-while

Anton (talk) 13:43, 8 August 2013 (UTC)

hey mattlobster...[edit]

ÑI just had the most sweetest gay experience and it reminded me so much of you. Gosh...why have you andyour intense gayness been gone from the site for so long. Is it not gay-friendly anymore? Atthe very least I should expect that uncyclopedia is bi-curious. Anyhoo...just thinking about you and your pretty and gay eyelashes and starched collar. --ShabiDOO 03:19, 8 October 2013 (UTC)


Hey...don't forget to vote for the Best articles of 2013. You're vote matters. Every vote counts. One vote can make a difference. Harry Potter is a wizard. Vanilla Icecream is the body of Jesus!. --ShabiDOO 01:58, 20 January 2014 (UTC)

UnSignpost: yet another new format but still less news[edit]

The UnSignpost
Telling You Stuff You Already Knew, But With Different Words!

– Llwy-ar-lawr (talkcontribslogs) 04:32, 5 May 2014Uncyclopedia is a community site that anyone can contribute to. Discover, share and add your knowledge! UncyclopediaUncyclopediaIllogicopediai:fr:LogimalpediePaudurapedyjaFrithchiclipeidUncapaediaAbsurdopediaScotypedia


Matthew, I have added you to our UnNews Broadcast Stafflist. I'd really like you to consider uploading more of your UnNews this side of the fence, they're fun, and the more compatriots over this side, the better! Leverage (talk) 18:30, 20 May 2014 (UTC)

It's back! - The UnSignpost[edit]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper that won't leave you the same way she/he did!

~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 09:10, 25 July 2014 (UTC)

Two weeks in a row? A new record! It's the UnSignpost[edit]

The UnSignpost
Your #1 source for Cajek ban jokes!

~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 23:41, 1 August 2014 (UTC)

Does this look infected to you? It's the UnSignpost![edit]

The UnSignpost
Word to your mother.
 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Aug 8 '14 12:19 (UTC)

More {{Boner}}s than a ragged Playgirl: It's the UnSignpost![edit]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper That Replaces Analysis With Flashy Graphics!
 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Aug 15 '14 20:05 (UTC)

We gave The UnSignpost an enema, so now it's regular![edit]

The UnSignpost
 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Aug 22 '14 2:10 (UTC)


The UnSignpost
The Newspaper Not Secretly Controlled By Mordillo, We Swear!

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 03:08, 7 September 2014 (UTC)

Unsignpost delivery attempt numbr hideous implosion[edit]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper Not Secretly Controlled By Mordillo, We Swear!

Brace Yourselves, The UnSignpost is Coming![edit]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper With Words n' Shit!

The USP is coming for you! (and your little dog too)[edit]

The UnSignpost
Telling You Stuff You Already Knew, But With Different Words!

Excuse me, sir, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, the USP?[edit]

The UnSignpost
Now with 20% more ninjas!

dicks lol: It's UnSignpost time![edit]

The UnSignpost
Th-the m-m-most con-confident new-Newspaper in a wh-while

The UnSignpost is back, baby! (And also a little bit of front)[edit]

The UnSignpost
May contain traces of humor!

Re-feature queue[edit]

If you want, you can go to Uncyclopedia:Re-feature queue/Nominate and pick one featured article that you wrote to be re-featured. You can also pick three features written by someone else to re-feature. --Talk to me! Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 20:29, 17 November 2014 (UTC)

Vote, Vote, Vote[edit]

It's that time of the year again! We're going to be showing off our Top Ten Articles of 2014 soon but so far, very few people have voted. It's all up to you to decide what's the best of the best! Go to Forum:Top 10 Articles of 2014 and vote now! --Talk to me! Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 02:21, 30 January 2015 (UTC)

Eh up![edit]

Was reading that British Sitcoms article we knocked together yesterday, over 8 years since that little gem was created. Where have the years gone? -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have known that much then. mAttlobster. (hello) 21:17, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
One word: Happy Monkey. ShabiDOO 10:49, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
Happy to see you again Matt :) Talk Mattsnow 08:42, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
Wieners. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngFri, Jul 31 '15 17:56 (UTC)


On that featured article there... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

Thanks for sticking your cream and jam in that scone Mhaille! mAttlobster. (hello) 21:48, 11 August 2015 (UTC)

Welcome back![edit]

Hey Matt, long time no see. Allow me to cordially invite you to our official Discord server (which has replaced our IRC). There, you will find many of Uncyclopedia's best contributors, such as the venerable Mhaille, to the lowly Kippy, Zombiebaron, Lyrithya and more. Pop in when you can to catch up. Cheers! AimsplodeL A B O R A T O R I E S 22:23 11 September 2019