User talk:Matt lobster

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Previously....And before that. Even earlier. Really early on.

BASIC[edit source]

On the style for this page, see also my comments to Bizzeebeever. Spıke ¬ 00:13 25-Dec-12

Hi, Matt![edit source]

Wiki, much? ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngTue, Dec 25 '12 1:10 (UTC)

I here you. --mAttlobster. (hello) 01:29, December 25, 2012 (UTC)
Said the Deaf Man. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngTue, Dec 25 '12 1:36 (UTC)

"Not safe for work" templates[edit source]

(Of which Aleister claims there are nine or ten) Here is the background: Those of us working RecentChanges have in the last week encountered a "template Nazi" Anon, perhaps a prude, slapping these on any page he thinks needs warnings to the reader. He is not adding Funny but adding Clutter. Aleister made the point that, as the entire website is "protected" by a Content Warning to new users, individual pages don't need additional tagging, part of his continuing argument that prior restraint plus censorship is Wikia overkill. Separately, in general I dislike templates that advise the reader how to interpret stuff they have not yet begun to read. Spıke ¬ 00:49 31-Dec-12

Genuine thanks (what other kind is there, huh?)[edit source]

Mate, I am really glad to get your vote, which means just as much regardless of the outcome. Much appreciated!!! Happy New Year!!!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th.png Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 13:33, Jan 1

Drop your pants and grab the eggnog! It's the UnSignpost.[edit source]

 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Wed, Jan 2 '13 13:20 (UTC)

UnSignpost sez, "Give Pease a Chance!"[edit source]

 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Jan 11 '13 5:30 (UTC)

Unsignpost - 20130119042144 gibberish asdf[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 04:23, 19 January 2013

Collab sometime[edit source]

Do you think you might be interested in a collab sometime?-- Kamek siggy.png ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 14:07, 21 January 2013 (UTC)

Definitely, what on? mAttlobster. (hello) 14:37, 21 January 2013 (UTC)
I actually wanted some help with Suddenly, Slender.-- Kamek siggy.png ŤäŁķ ¿Ș₮áłĶ?฿¡฿↓¡ography 14:55, 21 January 2013 (UTC)

Unsignpost - 20130124050125 gibberish asdf[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 05:02, 24 January 2013

Unsignpost - 20130131002159 gibberish asdf[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 00:24, 31 January 2013

Hi[edit source]

You're cool. — Capitalis quadrata Y.SVG (talk) (contributions) Feb 1 2013 20:43.

Unsignpost - 20130207013217 gibberish asdf[edit source]

~ Pointy.png I am Haydrahlienne, I am a bot, and I have no feelings. 01:34, 7 February 2013

It is the day of USP love, Valentine’s Day[edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 01:33, 14 February 2013 (UTC)

Crikey! It’s a rare, wild UnSignpost![edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 00:35, 21 February 2013 (UTC)

Surprise, Motherfucker, USP[edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 03:50, 28 February 2013 (UTC)

Explain[edit source]

Why the fuck would you even say that? That really made me mad. It isn't even close to VFD material.-- SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 20:36 3.01.13 20:36, 1 March 2013 (UTC)

>.> Er, sorry. It's just, I don't really think it is VFD material. And I truly think you don't either. I know, it's a little bit slapstick and short but I guess it is either like or don't like it. RAHB said he'd think it'd do well on VFH so... Sorry man. SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 21:57 3.01.13
Come on whizzster. What's the rush. You've got the beans when you let them grow. mAttlobster. (hello) 23:52, 1 March 2013 (UTC)
Idk... I don't feel like anyone reads my articles actually.  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 23:53 3.01.13
Keep up the action mAttlobster. (hello) 23:58, 1 March 2013 (UTC)
I am. I'm just not gettin much support..  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 00:17 3.02.13

I thought I heard the Imperial March. USP time, everybody![edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 20:35, 7 March 2013 (UTC)

Opinion?[edit source]

Can you give me your opinion on The Virginity Thief?  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 17:30 3.09.13

It's completely random. What's the concept of the article? Why did you nominate it? mAttlobster. (hello) 16:35, 10 March 2013 (UTC)
A Man Getting Hit in the Crotch 800 Times got featured, but I just thought making a criminal sex bandit film article would be funny, its called fiction lol  SIR Peasewhizz de NY Biblio HOS Awards 02:58 3.11.13

Can I have some salad with my UnSignpost?[edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 11:43, 14 March 2013 (UTC)

happy monkey[edit source]

Happymonnkey 2013.png

It won't be the same without you. --ShabiDOO 23:44, 18 March 2013 (UTC)

People like the UnSignpost because it’s hot! It has the best graphics and everything. Marcus, USP! Step yo’ game up![edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 02:26, 21 March 2013 (UTC)

UnSignpost’s BONER TIME![edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 21:53, 28 March 2013 (UTC)

This isn’t an April Fool’s Day Prank! This is the UnSignpost![edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 18:23, 4 April 2013 (UTC)

In Soviet Russia, Tanks on you![edit source]

Thank you for your vote and nice words on the St. Peter's Square unnews. There's always a dream that someone in Italy or thereabouts will read it and organize a square occupation (occupy the squares, man!), but it's fun fantasizing about anyway. I find myself liking this Pope, but who knows if he's going to move off his personal life things and carry that over into his decisions. Give me a few minutes and I'll bring over the talk page of the occupy unnews, it has a full size pic of that monster the popes have their public audiences in front of. Creepy. Thanks again! Aleister 20:00 4-4-'13

UnSignpost Time, Folks! I repeat, UnSignpost Time![edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 00:34, 11 April 2013 (UTC)

UnSignpost, late and lazy![edit source]

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 01:39, 19 April 2013 (UTC)

The 2 Days Tardy USP![edit source]

{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/20130425} } SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 01:03, 27 April 2013 (UTC)

Paul Shane[edit source]

For some reason I remembered that you had that video on your user name page. RIP Leverage (talk) 08:44, 17 May 2013 (UTC)

Week-old news two weeks late: The UnSignpost![edit source]

 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Tue, Jun 11 '13 2:32 (UTC)

UnSignpost is back[edit source]

And enjoy the news! Anton (talk) 18:40, 6 July 2013 (UTC)

The UnSignpost: a brilliant new format but less news[edit source]

The UnSignpost
Woop Woop! it's the sound of the Police UnSignpost!


Anton (talk) 13:43, 8 August 2013 (UTC)

hey mattlobster...[edit source]

ÑI just had the most sweetest gay experience and it reminded me so much of you. Gosh...why have you andyour intense gayness been gone from the site for so long. Is it not gay-friendly anymore? Atthe very least I should expect that uncyclopedia is bi-curious. Anyhoo...just thinking about you and your pretty and gay eyelashes and starched collar. --ShabiDOO 03:19, 8 October 2013 (UTC)

Remember[edit source]

Hey...don't forget to vote for the Best articles of 2013. You're vote matters. Every vote counts. One vote can make a difference. Harry Potter is a wizard. Vanilla Icecream is the body of Jesus!. --ShabiDOO 01:58, 20 January 2014 (UTC)

UnSignpost: yet another new format but still less news[edit source]

The UnSignpost
Now Delivered Trendily Late!

– Llwy-ar-lawr (talkcontribslogs) 04:32, 5 May 2014Uncyclopedia is a community site that anyone can contribute to. Discover, share and add your knowledge! UncyclopediaUncyclopediaIllogicopediai:fr:LogimalpediePaudurapedyjaFrithchiclipeidUncapaediaAbsurdopediaScotypedia

Hello[edit source]

Matthew, I have added you to our UnNews Broadcast Stafflist. I'd really like you to consider uploading more of your UnNews this side of the fence, they're fun, and the more compatriots over this side, the better! Leverage (talk) 18:30, 20 May 2014 (UTC)

It's back! - The UnSignpost[edit source]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper That Won't Judge You!
~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 09:10, 25 July 2014 (UTC)

Two weeks in a row? A new record! It's the UnSignpost[edit source]

The UnSignpost
Good things come to those who wait. So does the UnSignpost.
~Sir Frosty (Talk to me!) Proudly bogan 23:41, 1 August 2014 (UTC)

Does this look infected to you? It's the UnSignpost![edit source]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper that won't leave you the same way they did!
 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Aug 8 '14 12:19 (UTC)

More {{Boner}}s than a ragged Playgirl: It's the UnSignpost![edit source]

The UnSignpost
All your readers are belong to us
 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Aug 15 '14 20:05 (UTC)

We gave The UnSignpost an enema, so now it's regular![edit source]

The UnSignpost
Smiting the nail of news with the plastic hammer of truth
 ~ Capt. Sock Monkey ~ (berate) Beeverpedia.png ~ Fri, Aug 22 '14 2:10 (UTC)

OMG! A WILD USP IS ON THE LOOSE![edit source]

The UnSignpost
Just like Grandma used to make!

SLENDERMAN talk (Currently following you) 03:08, 7 September 2014 (UTC)

Unsignpost delivery attempt numbr hideous implosion[edit source]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper the Whole Family Must Enjoy!

Brace Yourselves, The UnSignpost is Coming![edit source]

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper Made Entirely From Recycled Internet Memes

The USP is coming for you! (and your little dog too)[edit source]

The UnSignpost
Sucking Journalism's Fat Wang. Badly.

Excuse me, sir, do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, the USP?[edit source]

The UnSignpost
The edition that's black and white and dead all over

dicks lol: It's UnSignpost time![edit source]

The UnSignpost
Because if the rumors don't spread at the salon, we must spread them in the news.

The UnSignpost is back, baby! (And also a little bit of front)[edit source]

The UnSignpost
The Only Newspaper That Is Not Controlled By The Cabal Who Are You What Are You Doi- AAAAHHHHH

Re-feature queue[edit source]

If you want, you can go to Uncyclopedia:Re-feature queue/Nominate and pick one featured article that you wrote to be re-featured. You can also pick three features written by someone else to re-feature. --Talk to me! Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 20:29, 17 November 2014 (UTC)

Vote, Vote, Vote[edit source]

It's that time of the year again! We're going to be showing off our Top Ten Articles of 2014 soon but so far, very few people have voted. It's all up to you to decide what's the best of the best! Go to Forum:Top 10 Articles of 2014 and vote now! --Talk to me! Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 02:21, 30 January 2015 (UTC)

Eh up![edit source]

Was reading that British Sitcoms article we knocked together yesterday, over 8 years since that little gem was created. Where have the years gone? -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

If I knew then what I know now, I wouldn't have known that much then. mAttlobster. (hello) 21:17, 27 July 2015 (UTC)
One word: Happy Monkey. ShabiDOO 10:49, 28 July 2015 (UTC)
Happy to see you again Matt :) Talk Mattsnow 08:42, 29 July 2015 (UTC)
Wieners. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-us.pngFri, Jul 31 '15 17:56 (UTC)

Congratulamations!!![edit source]

On that featured article there... -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb.png (talk to me)

Thanks for sticking your cream and jam in that scone Mhaille! mAttlobster. (hello) 21:48, 11 August 2015 (UTC)

Welcome back![edit source]

Hey Matt, long time no see. Allow me to cordially invite you to our official Discord server (which has replaced our IRC). There, you will find many of Uncyclopedia's best contributors, such as the venerable Mhaille, to the lowly Kippy, Zombiebaron, Lyrithya and more. Pop in when you can to catch up. Cheers! AimsplodeL A B O R A T O R I E S 22:23 11 September 2019

Happy Monkey Competition 2021[edit source]

HMC2021logo.png

Hey its HAPPY MONKEY TIME 2021 (Feb 21-28). Your favourite writing competition where we write articles on one another's suggested topics. Go ahead and sign up because the more users we have competiting the more ridonculously fun it is. If you don't wanna write you can sign up to judge! Sing up here. Remember it's not about writing a sure fire VFH article, but pushing the limits of your originality and creativity and spitting out an article on a topic you had never thought about writing before. Also...Shabidoo will love you forever and owe you like a zillion favours for it. He will literally do anything to please you if it means you participate. Happy Monkey Farts!!! ShabiDOO 15:37, 10 February 2021 (UTC)

UnSignpost delivery[edit source]

This is a telemarketing version of the UnSignpost, which has been provided to all active Uncyclopedians (selected by Cassie) free of charge. Enjoy! MediaWiki message delivery (talk) 01:38, 1 May 2021 (UTC)

The UnSignpost
Telling You Stuff You Already Knew, But With Different Words!

UnSignpost Home Delivery for May 1st, 2021[edit source]

The UnSignpost
Telling You Stuff You Already Knew, But With Different Words!

It's beginning to look a lot like…[edit source]

See you next year! The first annual *Kiss My Ass* Holiday Competition has officially ended for 2021

Santakitty.gif

Up for grabs is the coveted Clark Griswold Award for Holiday Cheer. Who will be crowned Holiday Victor?
Judgement day is upon ye!

Seasons Greetings!

It's that special time of year. A wonderful time for friends and family to rejoice in gaiety. Not you! You usually spend all of your hard-earned money on gifts for them, and now you just want to hibernate until your finances recuperate. Well, here at Uncyclopedia, entering our newest competition won't cost you a penny Sign Up Today! (pretty please)  – Zana Dark  talk to me  AJTA (ooh!) (aah!) ...·º•ø®@» LEG CUN GUN DUN 13:16, 13 December 2021