User:David Gerard

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Foolitzer Prize Award Foolitzer Prize Winner January 2007

This site optimised for Safari on my Mac quad-Core IV with thirty-inch cinema display,
not your poxy virus-riddled PC. So don't even bother.
You Leengux-using communists in particular can just fuck off.

Too much Wikipedia explodes your head. But I got Writer Of The Month for January 2006, so my ego got large enough to pull Mars out of its orbit. I could try Unicyclopedia next or something.

Commander of the Order
Officer of the Order

Stuff what I wrote[edit]

Or started, or wrote a substantial chunk of. Front-page features are in bold; current nominees are in italics and you should vote for them IMMEDIATELY.

/Ideas are for anyone's use if I don't get there first. /Draft is what it says. /Rubbish is my subpage for life's little failures. /David Gerard is the un-article someone wrote on me. Goodness!


Don't you wish you were a bishop too?


I spent December 2006 in bed ill, so churned out UnNews like a man in fever delirium (which I was). This got me nominated for the Foolitzer, which meant I had to turn out an article a day for all of January 2007. NOW THE WHOLE WORLD IS LOOKING LIKE FAKE NEWS. BECAUSE IT IS.

I then spent about three years writing these things roughly one a day for my own fake news site, NewsTechnica — tell all your friends! I've stopped now because I keep just wanting to rerun old articles that are relevant again, because the "news cycle" is called that for a reason.

Pre-Dec 2006[edit]

Dec 2006[edit]

Jan 2007[edit]

Feb-Mar 2007[edit]

April-July 2007[edit]

August-December 2007[edit]

January-June 2008[edit]

July 2008 on[edit]

GIMP abuse[edit]

GIMP 0.0.1, running under xterm.

This is stuff I mangled together myself, not just things I appropriated as-is as fair use under US law for purposes of satirical or political commentary. Although most of the sources are covered under that.


Writer of the Month Award Writer of the Month January 2006
Go do Special:Newpages patrol. I do believe there's more crap there than on Wikipedia newpages.
boarder[Outstanding Cracker of the Minute]boarder
You have been cited in Uncyclopedian Bios.
Apparently you are "notable". Don't ask me why; I think you're lame.
This user plays bass, because it attracts groupies without the need for excessive rehearsal time.
Protein.GIF I joined the Folding@home team, because I have nothing better to do with my computer.
British flag.gif This user is a total UKer,
and will commit murder
for a nice cup of tea.

(British Uncyclopedians)