UK Hitler Channel

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H.I.T.L.E.R (formally UK Hitler Channel, and still referred to as UK Hitler by 99.99999% of the British population) is a cable TV channel in Mediocre Britain, chartered to cover the entirety of the length and breadth of history, archaeology and culture in Britain, specifically those parts that happened in Germany from 1933 to 1945.

Popular series on H.I.T.L.E.R[edit]

  • Triumph des Kanalisationsystems (Triumph of the Sewerage System) — A Leni Riefenstahl documentary about the rebuilding of Germany's sewerage systems in the post-war period.
  • Pets of the Reich — the true tale of Hitler's time with Eva Braun's chihuaua, the one that shat its own body weight twice daily in the bunker. No wonder he tested the cyanide on the little bastard.
  • Janitors of the Reich: The Men Four Steps Behind Hitler — Nazi eugenics producing the Superior Übersanitationengineer.
  • Hitler Uncovered! — Previously unseen footage of the bunker. This week, Joseph Goebbels takes exception to Adolf's cleaning habits, Eva is the victim of a rather embarrassing boob-slip in the kitchen and Magda Goebbels is called to the diary room after being found guilty of trying to influence the others into nominating her 6 children for eviction.
  • The Love U-Boat — Set sail every week with Christopher Lowell and the most fun loving and gay crew within the Kriegsmarine. The tight & cramped quarters of a U-Boat gives a new meaning to "Wolf Pack" when these guys are ready to dive!
  • Adolf's Vault — Geraldo has his shovel once again. Let's all hope he finds a land mine the hard way!
  • 8 Simple Rules For Killing My Jewish Doctor
  • Starski & Hutchensi — Watch as the hip undercover policemen from Warsaw try to expose the Nazi infiltrators leading up to the invasion with the help of Hugo Bearovski, a pimp from the slums.
  • Führer knows best — A light hearted comedy series about life in Treblinka.
  • Uncle Adolf's Playhouse — An educational but fun morning children's show with Uncle Adolf and his band of friendly clowns "The Henchmen".
  • This Old Bunker/Ground Force — Roam the German countryside with Christopher Lowell as he decorates pillboxes & bunkers to "brighten-up the war", with Charlie Dimmock's nipples as the Ultimate Weapons.
  • Deutschland Bandstand — A wonderful showcase of musical talents from the ranks of the Waffen SS.
  • It's Your Reich — Featuring guests including Hitler's mum and poor old Goebbels.
  • Everybody Love Adolf — A sitcom based on Adolf's Nuremberg "stand-up" skits.
  • Close Encounters of the Third Reich — Hitler returns in a UFO, and he's still pissed off.
  • Genocide, She Wrote — Angela Lansbury investigates the Nazi death camps.
  • Kleines Deutschland — Viki Pöllard, Franz the only Jew in the village, Hitler's personal assistant Johann, and the rest of your favourite characters in this cutting edge sketch show.
  • The Reich Stuff — 11 contestants compete to see if they could have made it as an SS officer.
  • Mel Brooks: The Man After Hitler — Spring-time for Mel-Brooks in co-me-dy!
  • Auschwitz: The Musical!
  • Third Reich from the Sun — A group of illegal aliens attempt to covertly insinuate themselves into society.
  • Triumph's Revolutionary Speech — Triumph The Insult Comic Dog gives his weekly speech to thousands of worshipers.
  • Mission Impossible — Hitler and his blood sucking associates attempt to invade various neighboring countries in the dastardly ways. Including guest appearances from Maggie Thatcher and Rosa Luxemburg as Ethan Blunt's assistant. The show was later axed and replaced by Big Bruder.
  • Big Bruder — Popular reality TV show in which 14 SS officers are placed inside a bunker in the middle of No Mans Land for 13 weeks and just left there. Seriously. Forever. We locked the door and threw away the key.
  • What the Nazis Did for Us — Adam Hart-Davis presents, documenting what the world has Nazi Germany to thank for - from rocket science to Fanta.
  • Through the Murderhole — Lloyd Grossman leads us round a machine gun bunker as stormtroopers mow down allied troops. A guest panel has to guess which regiment is firing 'through the murderhole'.
  • Little Deutschland — a popular comedy spin off from the makers of Jew, Where's my Car? and UNTERWEINSIEMANSCHEN, that highlights the highs (no lows) of Nazi Germany and just how great the place was. Includes cameo roles from 'lil Addie' and 'Mick Jagger'.
  • I'm a Nazi! Get Me Out of Here! — a fly-on-the-bombed-out-wall reality series starring dishevelled soldiers from the badly equipped Wehrmacht and Waffen-SS divisions, filmed during the Battle of Berlin in the final days of World War 2.
  • The SS Factor — talent show where members of the public perform to see if they can kill the jews the best. winner becomes himler's replacement. Judges include Adolf Hitler, the late Michael Jackson, Dr. Tom Nolan and Big Bird.
  • Adolf the Empire Slayer — Teen drama about a misunderstood youth burdened with superhuman powers, and charged with protecting the world from Democracy.
  • "In The Night Trench" — Nazi show about a war-torn garden/trench/battlefield with fun things such as the Binky Boom-k and Furhey Hegla. Narrated by Hitler.

note: this channel closes down at 6.00 every evening as a result of "sabotage by communist jews" and is replaced with Babestation 4 (nudenhof-vier).

Music specials[edit]

And then comes a special: The Führers in Concert

  • Ballad of Adolf and Eva.
  • Sie liebt dich
  • Ride My Tiger Mk.III
  • A Hard Day's Kristallnacht.
  • Deutschland's Reich Forever
  • Ich bin das Walross
  • Norwegian U-boat Pen
  • Lovely Eva (Aryan Maid)
  • Hatin' the USSR
  • Luftwaffe in the sky with diamonds (looted from jewish families)
  • Hey Jew
  • You're a Jew
  • Zurück!
  • Dedicated follower of fascism
  • Happiness is a warm Panzerfaust
  • Heil, Raus
  • Mäxvel's Silver Luger
  • With a Little Help from Mein Kampf
  • Yellow U-Boat
  • Everyone's got something to hide except me and Herr Schindler
  • Propaganda Writer
  • I'm Only Killing
  • Pfennig Lane
  • Being for the benefit of Reichsminister Himmler
  • Hier Kommt Die Sonne (ft. Rammstein)
  • Fixing a Problem With International Jewry

Memorable moments[edit]

See also[edit]