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Today's Free Sample! Cyberbullying is like regular bullying except it's not really bullying. It was a term invented by whiny losers who didn't like it when I called Trevor a homo online, and then Trevor tattled to his mom, and then his mom told my mom, and then I got grounded for a month, I couldn't even play Minecraft, gawd! Just because I called Trevor a homo bitch (and it wasn't even a gay slur)! Cyberbullying is not real because it's not even in real life and Trevor deserved it because he ruined my iron farm when I was AFK, and he blamed it on a creeper even though I put torches everywhere, and my iron farm wasn't even on the ground, it was really high, so it couldn't spawn in a cave because you can't even reach it without an Elytra! And that homo wrecked it. So tell me, how would a creeper get up there Trevor? Huh? You just wanted to destroy it because I said your family was poor and uses more food stamps than the rest of us. That farm was everything to me you homo (which I mean virtually, and not real like). (Full article...) Recently featured: Velociraptor Road Rage HowTo:Burn Your Friend's House Down UnPoetia:The Poop Sonnets Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured when you become an EXCLUSIVE MEMBER. More of the best of Uncyclopedia edit More can be yours! Join today! October 11: Tasty Birds Day 1581 - The Portuguese are the first to deep fry the tasty dodo 1776 - George Washington devours a bald eagle. 1809 - Famed explorer Meriwether Lewis dies of a gunshot wound. Although it is generally believed to be a suicide, others note that suspicious-looking kiwis were seen lurking in the area. 1890 - Americans stop eating pigeons after an intensive ad campaign by Big Chicken. 1923 - Scientists prove there are no penguins at the north pole, after eating them all. 1989 - McDonald's introduces the Ostrich McNugget and the Fossilized Dodo Tendie, despite heavy protests from environmental groups. 2012 - New York forces the homeless to eat pigeon in exchange for welfare, activists cry fowl. Archived Anniversaries	edit For exclusive news coverage, get UnNews PLUS! One simply cannot piss until he scans this. Starmer unveils new digital ID cards to help further monitor citizens' pornography intake (Pictured) BoJo and Co. politely ask Nigel Farage to stop lifting children Florida Man found guilty of attacking Trump "as an alligator", sent to Alligator Alcatraz Omaha man's order of salmon sliders indistinguishable from salmon burgers Charlie Kirk gets l+ratio'd during a speech in Utah Sheeranism officially legalised in Yankeeland Angela Rayner defects to Reform UK Hollow Knight: Silksong gets released; Steam crashes for the second time this year Some mega pop star and her football player boyfriend get engaged. Yaaay. NFL teams replace female cheerleaders with gay dudes Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia/Ukraine and Israel/Hamas "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • Kids and pregnant moms trying to gain "super autism powers" by binging on Tylenol • Democrats and Republicans throwing hissy fits in Washington Recent deaths: Terence Stamp • The Devil's Rejects Unrated Director's Cut 4K (also Saw 2 & 3) • Trump's pet sloth • Joe Burrow's toe • Robert Redford • Baltimore Ravens' morale • The US Government's money • Jane Goodall • The Yankees' World Series dreams Upcoming deaths: DEI • R. Kelly and Bryan Kohberger (in jail) • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Dallas Cowboys', Cincinnati Bengals' and Baltimore Ravens' seasons • MSNBC • Lil Nas X • Donald Trump • Windows 10 • Kids and moms trying to gain autism powers from Tylenol • Mark Sanchez's career and freedom More Current Events at UnNews News edit Did you know... That you can get Did You Know in your email if you SUBSCRIBE TODAY! ... that it's been proven beyond reasonable doubt that 50% of modern marriages end in divorce because of arguments inside IKEA stores? Read More
edit Recent articles! Exclusive access for PLUS members ONLY! Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles
Exclusive PLUS member of the Month!!! Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,762 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Plus:!:

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