Babel:Gv
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Ahoy, me hearty and welcome to Pirateopedia (formally HMS Uncyclopedia), the duty-free encyclopedia that pirates can edit Arghh! Davey Jones has inspired us to sink and pillage 40,158 ships since we set sail in January 2005. Before running out your guns, please read the ships charter and the pirates code or you'll be Walking the Plank. Buried Treasure:
Most Succesful Pirates | LLoyds List's | Other Ships... |  |
 I was thinking of The Pilgrim Fathers the other day; their fantastic voyage to a new world and the dangers they endured. And I wondered why would God place such obstacles in the way of the faithful? Why did He make their lives in England so uncomfortable that they would swap the warm ale of their homeland for the high seas? Of course, it seems obvious that just as God tested Abraham's faith by demanding he sacrifice his son, so the Pilgrims were forced to sacrifice the casual violence and binge-drinking of home to prove their worthiness to inherit the best that His creation could provide. And how He rewarded them; not just by providing their progeny with proficient dentistry, but by emptying an entire continent in front of them with the divine gift of firearms and the smallpox virus. Surely these God-fearing heroes were truly the men made in His image. Surely too, God gave our forefathers this new home so they could move away from men made according to less divine templates. Surely too He made them cross the Atlantic to put distance between them and those who perversely choose to worship Him incorrectly. Or not at all. With what interest must He have watched the progress of their tiny ship across His mighty ocean, His unseen hand guiding them through the uncharted waters. And then I thought about how God must see us all from his vantage point in the clouds. Scientists say that the Earth is 6,800 years old. Well, even the most compassionate of beings must get bored, with nothing to look at millennium after millennium but His own handiwork. (Full article...) Recently featured: You can vote for your favorite Pirate to be avoid the handmans noose. More of the best Pirates from the good ship Pirateopedia What were we getting up too in past years, Arghhhh!
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What be worrying the Land Lubbers
Ongoing: Eurovision • The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, and Deltarune • Russian Invasion • Israel-Palestine conflict • DOGE budget cuts • Trump and Xi's tariff games • The IRS hunting late tax payers • NBA finals and Stanley Cup Recent deaths: George Wendt • Updates for Mortal Kombat 1 • Rick Derringer • Carolina Hurricanes' choke job in the playoffs • New York Knicks' surprisingly kickass season • Fear Street: Prom Queen • John Redcorn Upcoming deaths: DEI • Google's ad monopoly • Cleveland Browns' locker room • LeBron James' career • Diddy's and Chris Brown's chances at freedom • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen Arghh, I'll wagger you didn't know that...From Uncyclopedia's roughest captains:
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Recent press ganged crew
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Pirate of the Month and Swabbie of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so.
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