From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation
Jump to search
|
I was sitting in my living room very late at night, watching the Friday the 13th franchise. Something felt off, though. I don't mean in the way some horror movies might make you uneasy; something felt really, really wrong. That's when I heard it.
KI KI KI MA MA MA
I immediately got up and looked out the window. That's when I saw the bastard.
Jason Voorhees. Standing underneath a streetlight. No weapon. No credit card. No signup. No bullshit. He's not here to kill me; he's here to lay a goddamn beatdown, no two ways about it. I'll be damned if I let that happen. Me and him were staring at each other for about ten seconds before he started walking towards my house. Time to face the music. (Full article...)
Featured today, a long long time ago
|
|
|
|
DID Y0U KN0W...
|
- ... that the WWF is the only "sports entertainment" organization endorsed by PETA and Greenpeace? (Pictured)
|
|
IN 7H3 N3W5
|
One simply cannot piss until he scans this.
|
0N 7HI5 D4Y...
|
October 28th: Carpe Diem (United States)
- 1066 - William the Bad Motherfucker PWNZ the Saxon army. Maybe they should have stopped playing so much damn jazz and maybe picked up a sword, eh?
- 1492 - Christopher Columbus lands in Cuba, stocks up on Cuban cigars, Che Guevara memorabilia.
- 1955 - Bill Gates is born. Biblical scholars widely regard this as one of the signs of the End Times described by the Bible.
- 1956 - Iranian president Mahmoud Ahmadinejad is born. His childhood is marked by several instances of being dropped on his head and drinking paint thinner.
- 1793 - Eliphalet Remington, American firearms manufacturer, was born. Americans traditionally celebrate his birthday by turning to the person on their left and shooting them.
|
|
WRI73R 4ND N00B 0F 7H3 M0N7H
|
|
Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!
So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.
Let us all clap for him because I said so.
You now only have 3, god dammit, 3 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!
|
Uncyclopedia's sista projects
|
| Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.
|
Uncyclopedia Languages
|
| This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,901 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including 1337!:
|
PR073C73D BY 7|-|3 F4IR U53 C14U53, 4ND 4 1337 C14N 0F C1INJ45.
