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Putnam & Howell are an architecture and urban design firm which specializes in Hostile architecture, an innovative design trend defined by its "open and wanton hostility" towards the homeless. We are world leaders in the use of defensive design to deter unwanted people from loitering in buildings, parks and other public places, and our designs are found in hundreds of urban centers around the globe. We value public safety and a human environment which engenders mutual trust and peace of mind. We have been serving clients who share these values for over 55 years.

Although we sympathize with the plight of those who choose to live on the street, the homeless damage the aura of togetherness and inhibit free commerce wherever they're found. Not to mention their ghastly smell. Putnam & Howell believe that public spaces are shared centers of community spirit where everyday people go to shop, walk briskly, and shop some more. We are thankful for our designers at Putnam & Howell, who find humane ways to manage the vagrants who use public seating areas as their own luxury bedding accommodations. (Full article...)



Thirteen Russks, whattaya get?
13 Russians and 3 Russian entities indicted for screwing up U.S. election.
Featured Design
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When it was invented, the lance with a brick on the end was considered a marvel of contemporary medieval war technology. The lance with a brick on the end made it possible for unexperienced, n00b knights to defeat 1337 knights using the old-fashioned, brick-free lances nine times out of ten. The vast superiority of the lance with a brick on the end led to its near-universal adoption within a period of less than two decades. Note that the n00b knight on the right also has an Apexi "Cat back" muffler system on his head, which is first evidence that riceboys existed as early as the 14th century.

Image Credit: Sunsneezer

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More recent products | Most wanted designs | Most recent stores | Worst Stores | Lonely products | Product Review | Requested designs | Stuck stores needing a push

Store and Design of the Month
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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.

Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

You now only have 3, god dammit, 3 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

  ZZZZ I L    K  K  OO    Zilko won some award!!
    Z  I L    KKK  O  O   Click Here to see Zilko, the greatest Newspaper Magazine.
   Z   I L    KKK  O  O   
  ZZZZ I LLLL K  K  OO                    (C) UnZeta/Rabdon Entertainment 2018

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To be completely honest,
I didn't get those awards.