Satan vs. Tyson
Satan vs. Tyson, billed as Payback was a boxing match that took place on June 6, 2006, widely regarded as one of the greatest boxing matches of all time. It was a fuckfest and boxing match at the same time. What's not to love?
Tyson won in seven rounds by disqualification.
 Promotional poster | |||||||||||||||||||
| Date | June 6, 2006 | ||||||||||||||||||
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| Venue | Streets of America, baby | ||||||||||||||||||
| Title(s) on the line | Pride and dignity | ||||||||||||||||||
| Tale of the tape | |||||||||||||||||||
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| Result | |||||||||||||||||||
| Mike Tyson wins by disqualification | |||||||||||||||||||
Background[edit | edit source]
Satan and Tyson used to be friends for a long time before the fight. During an interview discussing the upcoming fight, Satan looked directly into the camera and said, "I'm gonna fuck him in his ass!" Tyson grinned.
Fight Night[edit | edit source]
When the match started, Satan immediately got a point deducted by punching Tyson in the balls. Tyson was given five minutes to recover. Tyson dominated the first few rounds before being almost knocked out by a spinning roundhouse kick. The referee, instead of being reasonable and disqualifying Satan immediately, didn't even pause the fight and instead let Tyson absorb multiple kicks to the body, head, and legs.
Tyson eventually composed himself and knocked Satan down with a right hook. During the ten-second count, Tyson walked to Satan's corner and started pissing on the corner-men — which the referee didn't do anything about.
In round 6, Satan almost fulfilled his promise when he knocked Tyson down with another roundhouse kick. While Tyson was down, Satan pulled down Tyson's trunks and started to violate him. Tyson clenched his ass cheeks, which crushed Satan's fiery red -
A Brief Interlude The continuing verbal description of this event is probably not fit for general audiences. Suffice it to say that both Tyson and the Prince of Darkness continue to up the ante by alternatively perpetrating acts of such lewdness and degradation upon each other that it is far better for everybody concerned if we just simply skip over the remainder of this sordid scene, and rejoin the action in round 7.
Near the end of the 7th round, Satan picked Tyson up and threw him over the ropes. What followed was a shocking surprise — the referee actually disqualified Satan on an unrelated technicality. Satan immediately dropped to his knees, sobbing uncontrollably.
Aftermath[edit | edit source]
Tyson snuck into Satan's locker room and ostensibly found corner-man Lucifer Lucian already dead.