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Today's Party Column Lord Sauron, 1st Earl of Hertfordshire, KG, GCMG, PC (∞ BC – 28 May 1896), known as The Dark Lord of Mordor before 1861, was an English Conservative politician who served as Prime Minister of the United Kingdom in the mid-19th century. He is well remembered in the United Kingdom as the first Prime Minister to exist solely as a manifestation of pure evil, a tradition that has since been continued by subsequent Conservative politicians. Details of Lord Sauron's past are sketchy at best, it was rumoured that he served as an officer in the Crimean War, where he would famously hurl Cossacks 20ft in the air with a giant iron mace, but these feats are likely fictionalised, as there is no reputable evidence that Cossacks actually exist. Sauron first arrived on the British mainland in 1861. He was drawn to the island, so the legend goes, because he mistook the inhabitant's unusual facial characteristics for that of the orcs of his homeland. (Full article...) Recently featured: The Larry Sanders Show · Woody Allen · Lord Sauron Archive · Vote for featured articles You can beg our leader to feature your favorite columns. More of the best democratically-voted columns Download our military mind implant device edit Our glorious history April 26: Hyperbole Day! 1764 - Hyperbole day founded in the most spectacular ceremony since the dawn of time. 1834 - The best day in all of history! There'll never ever be another day like it! It's amazing! Not like I'd tell you, though. 1901 - President Teddy Roosevelt mounts his wife: BULLY! 1965 - The mildest day in the history of the universe. No other day was as mild. Ever. Aside from the racism. 1983 - The worst day in the history of the universe, God himself mourns. (Pictured) 1986 - Ronald Reagan stays awake for an entire cabinet meeting! Good job, Mr. President! Let the void take you! 2016 - The best night I've ever had. Ever! It felt so good! Say goodbye to cats! Complete, fully accessible party archives	Today's hangul word is space Use this word to awe your enemies.
	edit Today in the DPRK Trick or treat! First look at Michael Myers mask in Halloween 2018 (Pictured) Small man with a big footprint: Verne Troyer, Mini-Me, dies Benjamin Netanyahu revokes Natalie Portman's Jewishness after award snub You know Avicii? he made the song that went Dum dum du du du dum? Yeah, he's dead Barbara Bush dies, her last words: "Why, Jeb, why?" UnNews remembers Night Court star Harry Anderson Michael Cohen's mystery client is Sean Hannity R. Lee Ermey dies! Don't start blubbering, maggots! John Boehner celebrates 4/20 early Putin dumbfounded by concept of free speech, free blinis Rodong Sinmun, page 2 edit It is an irreputable fact... ... that bestiality just got 15 percent more legal? You cannot deny... ... that in order to complete the video game World of Warcraft, over one cubic mile of animals must be clicked? More wisdom
edit Recently published Fear Factory Faith No More How Do You Solve A Problem Like Thomas Becket Bookshelf Tad Queens of the Stone Age The Larry Sanders Show Aviv Geffen Pink Floyd Keren Peles Gangrene UnBooks:Roman Polanski Sylvester Stalone Druze Hostile architecture Celtic Frost Papyrus Behemoth (rw) David Michael Haneke Rami Fortis Dream Theater Big Me Gothic metal Death (band) More recent stories | You have a voice | Revisionism | Build our country | Isolationists | Democracy | Help your party
Party members of the month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners Now you only have 4, yes 4 days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!

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