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로동신문에 오신 것을 환영합네다! the official party-controlled newspaper of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Our Dear Leader has inspired us to work on 38,573 articles since opening in 1948. Before editing, please read the Manifesto and browse the Constitution. Korean Workers' Party | Military exercises | Military technology | Soldiers | Juche | Party line The Glory of Korea | ㅆ to ㅋ | Other...

Today's Party Column Carnies are a nomadic people that originated on the steppes of Central Asia. Long known to the West for their seemingly strange customs and frequent wars with Muscovy’s infant Czarist kingdoms (and, later, the Russian Empire), Carnies have been instrumental in both the shaping of world history and the advancement of games based upon throwing balls into or at something from three to six feet away. Archeological evidence suggests that Carnies originated on the steppes of Central Asia. Like most nomadic peoples, Carnie society depended heavily upon a tribal- or clan-based system. In the case of Carnies, a clan was known as a Carnival, and a group of many Carnivals in one place was known as a County Fair. (Full article...) Recently featured: This page does NOT exist Bubbles the Clown Nevermind Trump vs. Biden Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can beg our leader to feature your favorite columns. More of the best democratically-voted columns Download our military mind implant device edit Our glorious history December 15: International Day of Björk (Iceland) 1939 - Classic movie Gone With the Wind first premieres as a travelling flipbook exhibition. 1945 - General Douglas MacArthur orders the Japanese to stop using those weird toilets with the tubes that spray water up your butt. 1978 - After the United States recognizes the People's Republic of China as the real China, Taiwan sinks into the sea. 1981 - The first suicide bombing is carried out in Beirut, Lebanon, declared a revolution in the terroristic arts. 1996 - Weirdo sends Björk (Pictured) a letter bomb after his copy of Homogenic is lost in the mail. 1970 - Soviet space probe lands on Venus, is declared the new "red planet." 1973 - The American Psychiatric Association adds "likes the taste of creamed corn" to list of debilitating mental illnesses. 2011 - Morphle is created by a man from The Slenderlands Complete, fully accessible party archives	Today's hangul word is procrastination Use this word to awe your enemies.
	edit Today in the DPRK "He ah-no give me ah-good coverage!" Google reveals least popular searches of 2024 Jay-Z and Beyonce sit their children down and have a talk with them Luigi cosplays as Robin Hood and guns down health insurance CEO; (Pictured) Americans rejoice South Korea's president tries to order pizza, declares martial law instead Biden pardons Princess Peach and Blossom ... and Hunter... and Fauci... Special Counsel Jack Smith pardons President-elect turkey, meaning he gets away with January 6th Cicely Tyson demolishes Aaron Paul in Netflix "boxing" match Project 2025 to be implemented in 2026, riots ensue The Onion buys InfoWars. Extra true conspiracy theories coming soon! "Nope!" says, judge Epstein pal Trump picks sex pest pedophile as attorney general... only for him to pull out Trump picks Led Zeppelin to lead EPA Obama smears poop on daycare Kardashian and Aniston endorse bestiality UnNews publishes official 2024 post-election guide for liberals having to deal with Trump Joe Biden named winner of 2024 election, confusion erupts in America 2024 U.S. election cancelled due to absence of electoral votes, anarchy likely to follow TikToker Peanut the Squirrel swatted, killed for "illegal guns and drugs" Ongoing: Eurovision Song Contest • Russian Invasion • Israel-Hamas conflict • United States presidential election aftermath • NBA and NHL seasons • Athletes doing the "Trump Dance" • Bill Belichick going insane Recent deaths: Brian Thompson (United Healthcare CEO) • Democrat party • Diddy's career • The Eras Tour • Alabama football's championship bid • The white guy from The Mod Squad Upcoming deaths: Vladimir Putin • Bashar al-Assad • Diddy's freedom • Benjamin Netanyahu • Jay-Z's career and freedom • Kate Middleton • Aaron Rodgers' career Rodong Sinmun, page 2 edit It is an irreputable fact... ... that there is no other word for thesaurus? You cannot deny... ... that Barns and Nobles is the most successful medieval farming roleplaying game, played by millions of teenage nerds worldwide? More wisdom
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Party members of the month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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