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로동신문에 오신 것을 환영합네다! the official party-controlled newspaper of the Democratic People's Republic of Korea. Our Dear Leader has inspired us to work on 30,288 articles since opening in 1948. Before editing, please read the Manifesto and browse the Constitution. Korean Workers' Party | Military exercises | Military technology | Soldiers | Juche | Party line The Glory of Korea | ㅆ to ㅋ | Other...

Today's Party Column “ God made the world just as much for me as for any one else. ” — Oscar Wilde Click on Oscar Wilde's handsome face to be taken to one of our best articles! Choose the next front page article. Write something funny. Do something pointless today. Recently featured: Reductio ad Hitlerum · Leninade Archive – Vote for featured articles You can beg our leader to feature your favorite columns. More of the best democratically-voted columns Download our military mind implant device edit Our glorious history August 18: Everybody Run From the Godzilla Attack Day 644 - A prodigous comet appears in the sky, in the shape of a rock. The rock magically flies through the sky, before it lands in ancient Greece and kills a busload of time-travelling nuns. 1868 - French astronomer Pierre Jules César Janssen discovers helium. Initially, he had a difficult time explaining the gas producing process without evoking gales of laughter. 1969 - Godzilla tries to attack France, but has to stop in Tokyo to ask for directions. 1989 - The Who, working in conjunction with Godzilla, trash several hotel rooms in Wales and Scotland. The Isle of Man is never seen again. 1990 - Godzilla attacks Paris, humping the Eiffel Tower twice before being driven back into the sea. 1991 - Godzilla attacks Paris again, this time bringing flowers. The Parisians surrender to his radioactive charm, and an evening of bliss is had by all. 1992 - Godzilla once again attacks Paris, leaving fifty-three successive messages on the answering machine of the Ile de Cite, each one more angry and irrational than the last. Paris gets a restraining order. In a blind, drunken confusion, Godzilla attacks a department store in Rome. Mothra and Mechagodzilla are called to drive the heartbroken beast home. 1993 - Princess Diana pre-died. 1999 - Cape Breton declares an open nuclear war on the Y2K bug subsequently pounding it into oblivion. Eminent scientists have confirmed this fact as the reason why much speculation about the threat of Y2K was ultimately unfounded. 2006 - Way more people die than usual. 2007 - The Canso Causeway, forever asserting the will of mainland Nova Scotia against Cape Breton, is melted in my microwave. 2010 - Godzilla sends a passive-aggressive text message to Paris, asking if it wants its copy of High Fidelity back or if he should just throw it away. 2010 - 1:24pm, Josh "I'm full." 2017 - User:Nuttymays deletes the #general Discord channel in the uncyclopedia discord server Complete, fully accessible party archives	Today's hangul word is procrastination Use this word to awe your enemies.
	edit Today in the DPRK Trump presidency a dream, Bush in charge Trump warns against 'alt-left' and 'Ctrl+alt+del' groups Charlottesville: Stop the hate! Donald Trump confuses Presidency for Apprentice, fires Scaramucci Trump Jr. to make small daily confessions for the next four years Letter to the editor: Aliens ate my nephew! UnNews comes crashing to a halt after news deluge A Bat, a Man, not a Man-Bat, but a Batman: Adam West Dies Comedian Kathy Griffin brutally decapitates Trump mask Ramblin' Man Gregg Allman dead at 69 Rodong Sinmun, page 2 edit It is an irreputable fact... ... that the person above me has probably committed a felony? You cannot deny... ... that originally, Hell was an acronym for "Happiness, Euphoria, and Lively Laughter?" More wisdom
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Party members of the month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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