Babel:Te

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search

Welcome to WikiTestament

The free Internet Bible that anyone can edit.


God has written 41,049 Bible stories since opening in AD 1.

Before editing, please check your sources with God, or you will be banished to the wasteland that is Wikipedia.

Browse: Politics - Games - Computers - People - Quaint - Coherent
Most Popular - Alphabetical Index - Other Categories...

THE WIKI CREED
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book,
If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book;
and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life
—Revelation 22:19-17

NOW GO EDIT SOME STUFF!

175449-platinum-ingot.jpg

Platinum is an extremely expensive, yet highly ordinary metal. It is essentially one of over ninety silverly metals. Gold and Copper, the colorful ones, are the envy of Platinum to no end. Then why is it so expensive? Because Platinum is literally the most anti-social metal ever. It refuses to react with anything, even Halogens, and almost every single acid known to science can not even stain it. One thing that can react with it is Aqua Regia, meaning royal water. It is arrogantly so named because it can react with the kings of metals Gold and Platinum. Talk about ego!

Platinum is commonly used by people in high grade laboratory equipment and in jewelry for people who consider themselves too posh to use common gold jewelry. It can also be found residing in the Earth's crust at a concentration of roughly one part per billion. Platinum is the 78th element of the periodic table, it is derived from the Latin word "Platina" which literally means "Little silver", despite costing roughly 60 times more than silver. (Full article...)

You can vote for your favorite passages to be featured.

Books[edit source]

Genesis

More of the best of the Bible

Selected Anniversaries

{{Anniv}}

Recent news:


DawsonEmo.jpg
1977-2026

Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • ICE-y chaos in Minnesota • Fallout from the Epstein FilesWinter OlympicsSeattle flooding the streets with Starbucks coffee to celebrate the Seahawks' win • New England Patriots fans hiding in a corner after being exposed • r/TheDarnold having a MASSIVE field day

Recent deaths: Scott AdamsKianna UnderwoodUncyclopediaCatherine O'HaraLamontBrad ArnoldNFL season • New England Patriots fans' insufferability, for now • Lindsay Vonn's legSome kid from some movie you probably forgot existed, but had a funny titleJames Van Der Beek (Not Dick Van Dyke, Ashley Roberts from the Pussycat Dolls!) (Pictured)

Not dead: Dick Van Dyke, who's 100, bitches!! (Not to be confused with James Van Der Beek)

Upcoming deaths: Donald TrumpNYC's economy • WeedDick van Dyke, eventually • Netflix • Dancin' Maduro • Aaron Rodgers' career • Iran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files (cough cough Bill and Hillary Clinton) • Travis Kelce • the US government, again


More Recent News

Did You Know...

Cat 6774.jpg

Article request

Portals complement topics that nobody cares about and expand upon topics that everybody cares even less about.

Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs

For God-related chat, see #uncyclopedia @ IRCnet. (If you don't have an IRC client, you can use this link.) Just change the nickname to your Uncyclopedia name and the channel to #uncyclopedia.)

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and Almighty Satan.