Babel:Te

Welcome to WikiTestament

The free Internet Bible that anyone can edit.

God has written 40,990 Bible stories since opening in AD 1.

Before editing, please check your sources with God, or you will be banished to the wasteland that is Wikipedia.

Browse: Politics - Games - Computers - People - Quaint - Coherent
Most Popular - Alphabetical Index - Other Categories...

THE WIKI CREED
For I testify unto every man that heareth the words of the prophecy of this book,
If any man shall add unto these things, God shall add unto him the plagues that are written in this book;
and if any man shall take away from the words of the book of this prophecy, God shall take away his part out of the book of life
—Revelation 22:19-17
NOW GO EDIT SOME STUFF!

“Fools make a mock-at-sin: but among the righteous there is favour.” – Proverbs 14:9 THE COLOR OF THE GODS • THE HUE OF SALVATION • THE SECRET TO IMMORTALITY • THE BEGINNING AND END OF ALL THAT IS INSANE • THE FUCKING OF THE BATS (#ffe4b5)(#ffe4b5)(#ffe4b5)(#ffe4b5) MOCCASINS ARE BEIGNESS AND BEIGNESS IS MOCCASINS • MOCASSINGS PROTECT ALL THAT IS HOLY AND YOUR FAMILY HONOUR • LIVE FOREVER IN YOUR MOCCASINS • THE MOCASSIN IS ALPHA AND THE MOCASSIN IS OMEGA • MOCASSIN EXCEPTIONALISM IMPERMEATES THE FABRIC OF TIME AND SPACE • (#ffe4b5)(#ffe4b5)(#ffe4b5)(#ffe4b5) (Full article...) Recently featured: UnNews:NASA bamboozled as North Star disappears Mario Kart Presidential Wrestling Classic HowTo:Eat an orange Archive · Vote for featured articles · You can vote for your favorite passages to be featured. Books Genesis More of the best of the Bible edit Selected Anniversaries {{Anniv}}	edit Recent news: moccasins. Uncyclopedia commemorates on this 15th November the grace of moccasins. (Pictured) Scientists discover potato god, Potaculoues's fossil Trump kills the penny after realizing spending four cents on a one cent coin isn't the best idea Russian AI powered humanoid robot faceplants on stage in front of crowd Syrian National Museum gets robbed of six to seven Roman statues Cloudy windy Hurricane Melissa hits da Jamaica, mon! United Kingdom sends Royal Airforce “specialists” to Belgium to fight Russian drones “invading” airports A new candidate enters the upcoming 2028 presidential race US government shitdown ends after over 1000 flights inundated with shit New York City goes full Commie, elects Zohran Mamdani as mayor Los Angeles Dodgers win World Series with lucky bullshit, become the Kansas City Chiefs of baseball Dingo eats a woman's baby Interview: A Brief Chat About Uncyclopedia with Uncyclopedian and Lucky star. Indy police: former NFL quarterback Mark Sanchez literally butt-fumbles in real life Trump receives COVID vaccine despite supporters making their entire personalities being against it for years The US government shits itself Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince • Rich people fleeing NYC Recent deaths: YouTube player's old design • the guitarist and a security guard from KISS • June Lockhart • Nick Mangold • Jamaica • Toronto Blue Jays' World Series dreams • Donna Godchaux • Diane Ladd • Dick Cheney • Mark Butt-fumble's TV career • U.S. Government shutdown (finally!) • Tatsuya Nakadai • Sally Kirkland • The penny Upcoming deaths: Eurovision Song Contest • DEI • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBC • Donald Trump • Coral reefs • NYC's capitalistic economy • Bills Mafia's livers and kidneys after losing horribly to the Miami Dolphins • Weed • Stranger Things More Recent News edit Did You Know... ... that every time you fall asleep, you die?
edit Recent articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles
edit Article request Portals complement topics that nobody cares about and expand upon topics that everybody cares even less about. Art Peak pretentiousness Business Money, money, money! Comedy The science of funny Culinary Food for the soul Film Enter the Matrix Games Recess time Gay A gay ol' time Geography Get lost History Factually wrong Literature Literally illiterate Internet A series of tubes Music Rock on! Politics Politically incorrect People The people's portal Religion Speak of the Devil Science Playing to be God Society We live in one Technology Breaking stuff easier Television Turn your brain off Theatre To be or not to be Video Games Better than sex Zoology Beware of furries Portals Meta-Portal Community The Community Main Page The Uncyclopedia Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs

For God-related chat, see #uncyclopedia @ IRCnet. (If you don't have an IRC client, you can use this link.) Just change the nickname to your Uncyclopedia name and the channel to #uncyclopedia.)

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and Almighty Satan.