Portal:Music

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to: navigation, search
UnTunesLogo1big.gif
Welcome to Uncyclopedia's Music portal.

By far the most musical portal you will ever find.



Sound-of-music.jpg

To understand music, we must first understand sound. Sound is an ingredient used to make tuna casserole. (It is disputed whether sound is sweet or savory.) Sound is alive. The hills are alive with it. Just ask Julie Andrews. She loves the sound of farting.

I love music. Sweet or savory music. Any kind of music. As long as it's groovy. And rock - it has to be rock....and it has to be straight....and it has to be from San Francisco...no wait, I don't like music. I hate music. It sounds like my dog farting. Really eggy. I'm more of a cat person.


edit 

Highlighted Article

Serj-tankian.jpg
OK, so, you're crying because the angel did something that warrants the death penalty. That's deep, Serj...

So you want to write effluvial lyrics like the official Armenian-American Lebanese-born Poet of the Overwrought, Serj Tankian of genre-challenged rock band System of a Down.

The first question to ask yourself up front is, whatever for? Have the countless critical articles about his inability to pull a well-crafted subtle lyrical image out of his ass told you nothing? If so, then this article is for you.…

Archive Article credit: GlobalTourniquet (more…)

edit 

Music in the News

Destroyerwalkingthestreetsofnyc.jpg

Standish, ME, USA (USS) - Eyewitnesses say the once world famous rock band KISS has ruined another high school graduation. Parents report that students at Bonny Eagle High School were lining up to get their diplomas, when all of a sudden the rock band KISS "walked in and screwed it all up".

One student was walking across the stage towards the principal when the band kicked down the door, fell all over a bunch of chairs, then drunkenly told attendees that "KISS is back, and we're still rocking all night, every night!"…


Archive Article credit: The Woodburninator (more…)

edit 

Featured Image

edit 

Featured Artist

SergeiRach1.jpg
Sergei Rachmaninoff, no doubt stoned out of his mind.

Sergei Vasilievich Rachmaninoff was a famed Russian piano composer, whose primary goal in life was to make piano players really fucking pissed off by making his music as unplayable as humanly possible. He claimed to be a pianist himself[citation needed], but all he must have played was some easy shit like "Chopsticks" or "Mary had a Little Lamb". Seriously, if he had any actual knowledge of playing piano, he would have arranged his music in a way that was actually readable, as opposed to the messes he composed. Either that or he was on shrooms when he wrote them. Or both.…

Archive Article credit: Thekillerfroggy (more…)

edit 

Lyric of the Week

“No, I'm not a stranger Look! I have an umbrella!”

– From the UnTunes song: You can stand under my umbrella (you can also feel my antenna)

(more…)

edit 

Featured UnTunes

UnTunes:Main_Page
UnTunes     

 
UnTunes:Still Hurting
PLAY>MP3


So, after I broke up with Jenna, I was thinking, you know, just because we're broken up, that doesn't mean we shouldn't share our deepest feelings with each other, right? Chicks love that emotional shit.

So I wrote her this song about, you know, how much I miss her and how she makes me feel. I bet she'll be calling me any minute asking me to take her back.

Still Hurting

Well I'm still hurting so I'd be happy if you were hurting too.

Is it so much to ask that someone you love

be in constant unrelenting pain?


And I hope you stay up nights thinkin' of me

or maybe just lose your keys

So I'm waiting by the phone for you to call

and tell me, girl, that you misplaced your keys.…

Archive Musical credit: Hyperbole (more…)

edit 

Recent Articles in Music

edit 

Musical Articles by Genre

Classical Country Genres of Music Hip Hop / Rap


Jazz Popular / R&B Rock (General) Other Musical Articles

  The Beatles
John LennonPaul McCartneyGeorge HarrisonRingo Starr
The Fifth BeatleSir Pete Best
albums
Thank Thank You (1963) • Without The Beatles (1963) • A Hard Gay's Night (1964) • Beatles For Sail (1964) • Hell!! (1965) • Steel Funk (1965) • Revolter (1966) • Revolver (1966) • Sgt. Lt. Pepper's Only Lonely Hearts Club Bandana (1967) • Ringo Needs Some Money (1967) • Tragical Mystery Tour (1967) • The White Album (1968) • The Beatles: Ecological Number Ones (1968) • Yellow Sub Machine (1969) • Crabby Road (1969) • Let It Be (1970) • Ask Masters (1988)
related articles
BeatleficationBeatlemaniaBeatles In IndiaBritish InvasionLiverpoolPaul is deadMcCartneyismThe Revolution: A historyMaxwell EdisonBBCBeatles AboutThe Beatles Tribute BandMark David ChapmanUnNews:John Lennon denied resurrection for fourth timeThe Rutles
notable songs
Back in the U.S.S.R.Hey JudeI Am the WalrusLucy in the Sky with DiamondsRevolution 393Why?:Don't we do it in the road?