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... that existing is highly dangerous, and should not be performed unless you are competent enough to understand how to perform it?
... that The Great Toilet Paper Famine of 2020 was caused by Uncyclopedians?
... that existing is highly dangerous, and should not be performed unless you are competent enough to understand how to perform it?

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In the news
One simply cannot piss until he scans this. Trump receives COVID vaccine despite supporters making their entire personalities being against it for years Starmer unveils new digital ID cards to help further monitor citizens' pornography intake (Pictured) BoJo and Co. politely ask Nigel Farage to stop lifting children Omaha man's order of salmon sliders indistinguishable from salmon burgers Charlie Kirk gets l+ratio'd during a speech in Utah Sheeranism officially legalised in Yankeeland Angela Rayner defects to Reform UK Hollow Knight: Silksong gets released; Steam crashes for the second time this year Some mega pop star and her football player boyfriend get engaged. Yaaay. NFL teams replace female cheerleaders with gay dudes Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • Pregnant moms taking Tylenol to give their babies "autism powers" • Democrats and Republicans throwing hissy fits in D.C. Recent deaths: Terence Stamp • The Devil's Rejects Unrated 4K Director's Cut • Trump's pet sloth • Joe Burrow's toe • Robert Redford • Baltimore Ravens' morale • U.S. Federal Government • Jane Goodall • The Yankees' World Series dreams • Diane Keaton • Gaza War • Drew Struzan • Windows 10 • D'Angelo Upcoming deaths: DEI • R. Kelly and Bryan Kohberger • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • Cowboys', Bengals' and Ravens' season • MSNBC • Lil Nas X • Donald Trump • Aforementioned Tylenol moms • Mark Butt-fumble's career and freedom UnNews – Radio Free Lunch
On this day...
October 15: Opening Day of Hunting Season for Mimes (United States) 1804 - The first mime turns up in France. 1914 - Mime hunting season initiated to control the number of mimes. 1976 - Massacres and bloodbaths occur on the streets of France. Mimes nearly go extinct. The world rejoices. 2003 - PETA argues that the mime problem should be solved humanely, by imprisoning them in invisible boxes. 2004 - A disgruntled mime uses a magnum to "remove" any extra mimes in the area, he is promptly arrested. Apparently the mime wasn't using a silencer. 2006 - Vice President Dick Cheney shoots a mime in the face in a hunting "accident." View tomorrow – More anniversaries...

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Eugene Krabs stands in awe before his establishment as Donald Trump enacts his wonderful tariffs.

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Writer and Noob of the Month

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.

Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!

Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.

Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia.

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Uncyclopedia Languages

This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,777 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including ARCL!:

	Uncyclopedia English United Kingdom 40,777	Desciclopédia Português Brazil 50785	アンサイクロペディア日本語 Japan 19194	Nonsensopedia Polski Poland 17766	Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy 14423
	Désencyclopédie Français France 8936	Inciclopedia Español Spain 12400	偽基百科正體中文 Taiwan 6417	Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany 6330	Hikipedia Suomi Finland 7300
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016.

Other Uncyclopedias

	백괴사전 한국어 South Korea 6303	ไร้สาระนุกรม ไทย Thailand 3132	Pekepedia Tagalog Philippines 275	Bodohpedia Bahasa Melayu Malaysia 105	伪基百科汉语 Commie China 8269
	איןציקלופדיה עברית Israel 2187	קיינציקלאָפעדיע יידיש Yiddish 46	Tolololpedia Bahasa Indonesia Indonesia 6054	Ndhablek Basa Jawa Java 14	Goblogpedia Basa Sunda Sunda 11
	Yansiklopedi Türkçe Turkey 762	اللاموسوعة العربية Iraq 976	نانشنامه فارسی Iran 943	ანციკლ ოპედია ქართული Georgia 4	Uncyclopedia.km ភាសាខ្មែរ Cambodia 1
	Spademanns Leksikon Dansk Denmark 9095	Ikkepedia Norsk Norway 4563	Ikkjepedia Norsk (nynorsk) Norway	Psyklopedin Svenska Sweden 2497	Անգրագ իտարան Հայերեն Armenia 4	ວິກິພີເດຍ ລາວ Laos 8
	Valenciclopèdia Català Andorra 1060	Nunyepedia Asturianu Asturias 59	Desgalipedia Galego Galicia 5009	Oisquipèdia Occitan Occitania 33	আনসাইক্ল োপিডিয়া বাংলা Bangladesh 17
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	Нециклопедија Српски Serbia 456	Neciklopedija Bosanski Bosnia 27	Neciklopediju Hrvatski Croatia 303	Butalopedija Slovenščina Slovenia 31	Википедија Македонски Macedonia 175
	Oncyclopedia Nederlands Belgium and Holland 2807	Kwatsjpedia Limburgs Limburgs 21	Necyklopedie Česky Czech Republic 3530	Necyklopedia Slovenčina Slovakia 1888	Unciklopédia Magyar Hungary 1731
	Оксипедия Български Bulgaria 234	Neciclopedie Română Romania 167	Uichipedia Молдовеняскэ Moldova 4	Інциклопедія Українська Ukraine 1117	Абсурдопедия Русский Russia 4466
	Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96	Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 159	Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 267	Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 3176	Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 14
	Necyclopædia Latina Vatican City 279	Hatsiklopedia Malagasy Madagascar 8	Zombiepedia Zombie Chapel 7
Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016.