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As it happens, a Main Page is a page of primarity, popularity and urination-arity Today's featured paragraph Recently featured: I Fucking Love John "Bermuda" Schwartz Archive – Vote for featured articles You know you're WTF when... Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 357,581 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 357,581 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 357,581 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 357,581 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 357,581 total flamewars purged. Advertising Did you know... *... that the fictional droid C-3PO is fluent in over six million forms of communication, but only four of them are love? ... that condoms prevent many sexually transmitted diseases, and at least one erection? Sorry Candace... ... that the fictional droid C-3PO is fluent in over six million forms of communication, but only four of them are love? ... that condoms prevent many sexually transmitted diseases, and at least one erection? Sorry Candace... ... that the fictional droid C-3PO is fluent in over six million forms of communication, but only four of them are love? ... that condoms prevent many sexually transmitted diseases, and at least one erection? Sorry Candace... ... that the fictional droid C-3PO is fluent in over six million forms of communication, but only four of them are love?	In the news God Dammit, Bill Fucking Murray! Chevy Chase, Maryland to change name to Bill Murray (Pictured) Donald Trump farts A Saucerful of Secrets is 50 years old! Also Michael Jackson Growing belief that flat earthers do not exist Rush Limbaugh ties too much brain behind back, goes into cardiac arrest Ice cream is racist UnNews logo on articles now links to UnNews main page Opinion: Trump signs executive order to end border separation that HE started Fishermen reel in M15 Nuclear Bomb Rapper XXXTentacion shot and killed at 20 Trump uses Space Force to distract from border separation scandal Why your horror nerd friends are unusually excited Why your European friends are unusually excited Roseanne reboot gets canned after Roseanne can't keep her racism down to a 6.5 Twitter reinstates news outlet Palmer Report after brief suspension Phil Hartman: Twenty years later Twitter suspends news outlet Palmer Report for telling the truth NBC's next live musical celebrates hippies, drugs, nudity, masturbation, and sodomy Actress Meghan Markle marries unemployed welfare prince Senate votes to restore net neutrality, House says "hold my beer" On this day... July 13: Surreptitiously Masturbate Near A Sleeping Stranger Day 1921 – Sinead O'Connor is arrested for indecent exposure in a coma ward. 1945 – The Manhattan Engineering District achieves its first major success, giving the ability of flight to a medium-sized mouse. 1987 – The United States Supreme Court rules that disciplining your monkey near a sleeping stranger (pictured) is unconstitutional. 2003 – Stunningly gorgeous tennis sensation Martina Hingis stuns her fans by announcing her retirement. Her fans cry for days and refuse to eat. 2005 – Uncyclopedia viciously and unfairly deleted by extremist Wikipedians. 2009 – The Uncyclopedia Anniversaries break the fourth wall by telling you to get a job, you lazy git!
Featured picture {{Votevfp.dpl|image=Occam's Razor in Action.jpg |name=Image:Occam's Razor in Action.jpg |size=350px |caption=Norelco's flagship product, Occam's Razor, has nearly the same effect on philosophers as it does on their arguments. Unfortunately it doesn't do much about beards. |credit=Martinultima |nom=– Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • SU&W) 20:23 Dec 07, 2007 |scoretext= |fornumber=15 |for= Nom & for. I thought this was really clever. – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • SU&W) 20:23 Dec 07, 2007 Nom & for. It was funny! Excellent!. User:Rolando8/sig For. The simplest explanation I can come up with is "LOL IE7 Arrows!". --Muzak 05:39, 8 December 2007 (UTC) For I liked it.-Sir Ljlego, GUN VFH FIYC WotM SG WHotM PWotM AotM EGAEDM ANotM + (Talk) 20:43, 9 December 2007 (UTC) Smart AND funny! Who'da thunk it? -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 23:19, 9 December 2007 (UTC) For. I don't usually vote in here, but I really like this one. --Sir Under User (Hi, How Are You?) VFH KUN 09:53, 10 December 2007 (UTC) for. this image is awesome in every way. --SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 01:26, 11 December 2007 (UTC) For I'll go for this. —rc (t) 06:31, 11 December 2007 (UTC) For. Stupid uncivilized zombies, even their barons don't know what this means. Ж Kalir totally not Wario at all 21:15, 11 December 2007 (UTC) For. Occam's razor has never been presented in a more simplificated manner. Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 02:01, 12 December 2007 (UTC) Shaving cream. Maybe that would help with the beard. Unsolicited conversation Extravagant beauty PEEING 04:33, 13 December 2007 (UTC) Amusing, I never thought I'd see it up here... and LOL, the arrows are actually from KDE.  Megalomaniac Martin “The Unfortunately Unfeatured” Ultima • (VOTE FOR ME!) • talk • (AND MY PICS TOO!) • contribs 02:00, 14 December 2007 (UTC) For --General Insineratehymn 22:24, 30 December 2007 (UTC) For. That is sex, and Zombiebaron, you are a tit. -- Prof. Olipro KUN (W)Anchor Op Bur. (Harass) 08:40, 27 February 2008 (UTC) DJ Irreverent ... |againstnumber=2 |against= Against - Any joke that Zombiebaron has to research, and then still isn't funny, isn't funny to Zombiebaron. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 23:23, 7 December 2007 (UTC) Cute, but... I'unno, just not that funny. 1234 ~ 06:14, 13 May 2011 |comments= |%PAGE%=Uncyclopedia:VFP/Occam's Razor in Action.jpg|%TITLE%=VFP/Occam's Razor in Action.jpg|%DATE%=|%USER%=|%ARGS%=§image=Occam's Razor in Action.jpg §name=Image:Occam's Razor in Action.jpg §size=350px §caption=Norelco's flagship product, Occam's Razor, has nearly the same effect on philosophers as it does on their arguments. Unfortunately it doesn't do much about beards. §credit={u§Martinultima} §nom={User:Dr. Skullthumper/sig§20:23 Dec 07, 2007} §scoretext= §fornumber=15 §for= Nom & for. I thought this was really clever. {User:Dr. Skullthumper/sig§20:23 Dec 07, 2007} Nom & for. It was funny! Excellent!. {User:Rolando8/sig§00.58 Jan 06, 2008} For. The simplest explanation I can come up with is "LOL IE7 Arrows!". --User:Muzak§Muzak 05:39, 8 December 2007 (UTC) For I liked it.-{User:Ljlego/sig} 20:43, 9 December 2007 (UTC) Smart AND funny! Who'da thunk it? --{User:Thekillerfroggy/sig} 23:19, 9 December 2007 (UTC) For. I don't usually vote in here, but I really like this one. --{User:Under_user/sig} 09:53, 10 December 2007 (UTC) for. this image is awesome in every way. --{User:Gerrycheevers/sig} 01:26, 11 December 2007 (UTC) For I'll go for this. {user:Rcmurphy/sig} 06:31, 11 December 2007 (UTC) For. Stupid uncivilized zombies, even their barons don't know what this means. {User:Kalir/sig} 21:15, 11 December 2007 (UTC) For. Occam's razor has never been presented in a more simplificated manner. {User:Modusoperandi/sig} 02:01, 12 December 2007 (UTC) Shaving cream. Maybe that would help with the beard. {User:Boomer/sig2} 04:33, 13 December 2007 (UTC) Amusing, I never thought I'd see it up here... and LOL, the arrows are actually from KDE. {User:Martinultima/sig} 02:00, 14 December 2007 (UTC) For --{User:Insineratehymn/sig} 22:24, 30 December 2007 (UTC) For. That is sex, and Zombiebaron, you are a tit. -- {User:Olipro/sig} 08:40, 27 February 2008 (UTC) {u§DJ Irreverent} ... §againstnumber=2 §against= Against - Any joke that Zombiebaron has to research, and then still isn't funny, isn't funny to Zombiebaron. -- {User:Zombiebaron/sig} 23:23, 7 December 2007 (UTC) Cute, but... I'unno, just not that funny. {User:Lyrithya/sig} 06:14, 13 May 2011 §comments= }}
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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