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The Article Which Makes the Present Feature Uncyclopedia is proud to present an exclusive, never before published column by Chuck Norris. Recently a debate aired on ABC's Nightline pitting popular theists, Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron, against two reviled atheists from the "Rational" Response Squad, which is also reviled. This testifies to the growing number (30 million people) of fools who profess there is no God. Add to that what I believe is possibly three times that number of functional atheists, those who believe in a God but don't show it (as True Christians® do, by voting Republican, wearing little American flag pins and putting Jesus fish on the tailgates of their pickup trucks), and patriotic Americans in America are facing a new religious horizon in which atheism is becoming a formidable foe. Shockingly, although the majority of Americans continue to claim to be Christians, a Gallup poll discovered that forty-five percent of the population would support an atheist for President. Such a survey is a clear indication that the secularization of our Christian nation is alive and well. Secularization, if you are not aware, will signal the end of America as we know it. For example, soon the secular government, blinded by their lack of common Christian decency, will (as they did with public schools) banish the Bible from the White House, before banning it in church and eventually outlawing it in your very own home! Will real Americans continue to stand for this outrage? I pray to the Lord, no. (Full article...) Recently featured: HowTo:Rearrange the deckchairs on the Titanic Biffy Clyro Foreign accent syndrome CaseOh Archive · Vote for featured articles · Purge You can vote because of article of your taste which should become the feature. More being best of Uncyclopedia Download article feed plugin for Desktop of Google edit Designated commemoration day March 21: Vernal Equinox... Probably 5 AD - The first recorded instance of the question "What Would Jesus Do?" occurs when his mother asks what he wants for breakfast. 1890 - Oscar Wilde pens his novel The Picture of Dorian Gray in the vicinity of one of his favorite sources of inspiration, a kitchen sink. 1919 - The Treaty of Versailles is dictated to several secretaries, ending World War I. One of them is a German spy and covertly adds a clause mandating a sequel. 1931 - The electric guitar is introduced, resulting in the genre of Rock 'n Roll being born and enjoying its peak during the Great Depression. 1943 - In the last recorded mounted cavalry charge, soldiers on horseback from Austria-Hungary charge a battalion of Russian tanks and succeed in destroying 80% of them using only their broadswords and ceremonial poofy hats. 1993 - The first video is uploaded on the internet: a skin flute performance. Archived Anniversaries	suggest Word of day[edit source] Centered text goes here. edit News World shocked as Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks the bucket (Pictured) Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump *still really, really* wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Ongoing: Fallout from the Epstein Files • ~~War~~ Special Combat Operation in Iran • Winter Paralympics • Saturn Awards • Chucky McGoo's jawline being gradually destroyed Recent deaths: Team Italy sled hockey • Miami Dolphins, twice • That guy from Boston. The band, not the city. But isn't the band from the city? • Chuck Norris doesn't fuckin' die, the world died to him • Buffy • Xander Harris Upcoming deaths: Weed • Dancin' Maduro • Iran • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad • Atlanta Falcons • Every Cesar Chavez Street's name Advice of necessity? Ask Cthulhu! Current events of UnNews news** edit Did you knew... Ali sadaka ... that there's only one way to party? (Pictured) ... that you... you should have gone for my head? Oh Snap! ... that homeopathic solutions are an effective treatment for thirst? ... that if you say peacock, no one bats an eye, but if you say poop cock, everyone blows their minds? ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? ... that this in not a DYK entry? ... that Uncyclopedia admins are such lazy bums, they ask their users to think of DYK submissions? ... that being safe with guns is- *BANG* Do you worry...[edit source] ... that liberals want to eat your children? (Pictured) ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox? ... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else? ... that you actually didn't know? ... that gender is a scam invented in 1825 to sell more bathrooms? ... that I just had sex, and hey do you got any napkins? ... that paper beats rock, but guns beat everything? ... that the entire world rightfully belongs to Albania? Read Many
edit Recent articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary Recent article \| As for the Majority that we want the page \| The book correcting which required \| Add to stubs \| Pages of lonliness \| Examination of urine \| Concerning writing the attempt...
Writer and Noob of Month Poll for writer of month \| Poll for Noob of month \| Passing the winner: 2005/2006

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The Article Which Makes the Present Feature Uncyclopedia is proud to present an exclusive, never before published column by Chuck Norris. Recently a debate aired on ABC's Nightline pitting popular theists, Ray Comfort and Kirk Cameron, against two reviled atheists from the "Rational" Response Squad, which is also reviled. This testifies to the growing number (30 million people) of fools who profess there is no God. Add to that what I believe is possibly three times that number of functional atheists, those who believe in a God but don't show it (as True Christians® do, by voting Republican, wearing little American flag pins and putting Jesus fish on the tailgates of their pickup trucks), and patriotic Americans in America are facing a new religious horizon in which atheism is becoming a formidable foe. Shockingly, although the majority of Americans continue to claim to be Christians, a Gallup poll discovered that forty-five percent of the population would support an atheist for President. Such a survey is a clear indication that the secularization of our Christian nation is alive and well. Secularization, if you are not aware, will signal the end of America as we know it. For example, soon the secular government, blinded by their lack of common Christian decency, will (as they did with public schools) banish the Bible from the White House, before banning it in church and eventually outlawing it in your very own home! Will real Americans continue to stand for this outrage? I pray to the Lord, no. (Full article...) Recently featured: HowTo:Rearrange the deckchairs on the Titanic Biffy Clyro Foreign accent syndrome CaseOh Archive · Vote for featured articles · Purge You can vote because of article of your taste which should become the feature. More being best of Uncyclopedia Download article feed plugin for Desktop of Google edit Designated commemoration day March 21: Vernal Equinox... Probably 5 AD - The first recorded instance of the question "What Would Jesus Do?" occurs when his mother asks what he wants for breakfast. 1890 - Oscar Wilde pens his novel The Picture of Dorian Gray in the vicinity of one of his favorite sources of inspiration, a kitchen sink. 1919 - The Treaty of Versailles is dictated to several secretaries, ending World War I. One of them is a German spy and covertly adds a clause mandating a sequel. 1931 - The electric guitar is introduced, resulting in the genre of Rock 'n Roll being born and enjoying its peak during the Great Depression. 1943 - In the last recorded mounted cavalry charge, soldiers on horseback from Austria-Hungary charge a battalion of Russian tanks and succeed in destroying 80% of them using only their broadswords and ceremonial poofy hats. 1993 - The first video is uploaded on the internet: a skin flute performance. Archived Anniversaries	suggest Word of day[edit source] Centered text goes here. edit News World shocked as Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks the bucket (Pictured) Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump *still really, really* wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Ongoing: Fallout from the Epstein Files • ~~War~~ Special Combat Operation in Iran • Winter Paralympics • Saturn Awards • Chucky McGoo's jawline being gradually destroyed Recent deaths: Team Italy sled hockey • Miami Dolphins, twice • That guy from Boston. The band, not the city. But isn't the band from the city? • Chuck Norris doesn't fuckin' die, the world died to him • Buffy • Xander Harris Upcoming deaths: Weed • Dancin' Maduro • Iran • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad • Atlanta Falcons • Every Cesar Chavez Street's name Advice of necessity? Ask Cthulhu! Current events of UnNews news** edit Did you knew... Ali sadaka ... that there's only one way to party? (Pictured) ... that you... you should have gone for my head? Oh Snap! ... that homeopathic solutions are an effective treatment for thirst? ... that if you say peacock, no one bats an eye, but if you say poop cock, everyone blows their minds? ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? ... that this in not a DYK entry? ... that Uncyclopedia admins are such lazy bums, they ask their users to think of DYK submissions? ... that being safe with guns is- *BANG* Do you worry...[edit source] ... that liberals want to eat your children? (Pictured) ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox? ... that if Mommy is willing to lie about a freaky old dude who sneaks into children's bedrooms in the middle of the night to eat your cookies and drink your milk, she'll no doubt be willing to deceive you about everything else? ... that you actually didn't know? ... that gender is a scam invented in 1825 to sell more bathrooms? ... that I just had sex, and hey do you got any napkins? ... that paper beats rock, but guns beat everything? ... that the entire world rightfully belongs to Albania? Read Many
edit Recent articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary Recent article \| As for the Majority that we want the page \| The book correcting which required \| Add to stubs \| Pages of lonliness \| Examination of urine \| Concerning writing the attempt...
Writer and Noob of Month Poll for writer of month \| Poll for Noob of month \| Passing the winner: 2005/2006

Babel:Zw

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