Babel:Nub

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welcum 2 uncyclopedia, da content-free encyclopedia dat steve/i can edit.


sophia haz inspierd us 2 wurk on 40,768 articles since opening in january 2005.

before editin, plz raed da writin guidelines n flamewar manual.

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coolest | everyting | udder crap...


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Charlie Kirk's 'Smile'.png

Charlie Kirk was a right-wing political activist, master(de)bater, possessor of the world's largest non-equine set of gums, and penitent God-fearer. He was best known for being a follower of Christ, having a perfectly proportioned smile, and for founding Turning Point USA, a conservative advocacy group which sought to bridge the political divide wrecking our nation by browbeating and clip-farming America's most retarded liberals for social media clout. His viral debate clips garnered tens of millions of views, and his staunch defense of pro-life, pro-gun, and pro-America viewpoints earned him comparisons to the inimitable William F. Buckley Jr., minus the part where he was a closeted homosexual. An ardent supporter of President Donald Trump, he dedicated his life to spreading the Judeo-Christian values of free expression, America First, and branded hat salesmanship.

Sadly, his life was cut short by an assassin's ANTIFA bullet, inscribed with the messages, "I love my trans furry wife" and "This had nothing to do with Israel." He died doing what he loved, quibbling over FBI crime statistics in public. Charlie Kirk is now with his Savior, debating the angels over heaven's incredibly lax immigration policy. (Full article...)

u can voet 4 you're favorit articlez 2 b feturd.

da kool stufz


Selected anniversaries

October 13: International Paranoia Day

THIS IS WHAT THE GOVERMENT WANTS TO DO TO YOU!!!!!!
  • 1792 - Cornerstone laid for the White House. Who lays stones? Masons. What organization did the masons start? Freemasons. Do I need to spell the rest out for you people?
  • 1835 - Nothing of historical significance happened on this day in history... or so the Illuminati would have us believe.
  • 1955 - The. U.S. Government does not begin top secret operations at Area 51 (wink wink).
  • 1974 - TV personality Ed Sullivan passes away due to "natural causes". And just like that, the Jews are one step closer to global domination.
  • 2000 - Preparations for the 9-11 attacks are begun by agents of the United Nations, the Jews, the CIA, and the Vatican.
  • 2025 - Nothing apocalyptic will happen... or will it?


archived aniverserys

In the news


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One simply cannot piss until he scans this.

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine and Israel-Hamas "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • Pregnant moms taking Tylenol to give their babies "autism powers" • Democrats and Republicans throwing hissy fits in D.C.

Recent deaths: Terence StampThe Devil's Rejects Unrated 4K Director's Cut • Trump's pet slothJoe Burrow's toe • Robert RedfordBaltimore Ravens' morale • The U.S. Federal Government • Jane GoodallThe Yankees' World Series dreams • Diane Keaton

Upcoming deaths: DEIR. Kelly and Bryan KohbergerIran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Cowboys', Bengals' and Ravens' season • MSNBCLil Nas XDonald TrumpWindows 10 • Aforementioned Tylenol moms • Mark Sanchez's career and freedom


currnt stufz


Did you know...

From Uncyclopedia's biggest morons:


raed mor

writer of da munth

Writer of the month.png

Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,768 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Nub!:

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Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016.

4 nonsense related noob chat, see This instructional video.

protected by da government, n a 31337 klan of pirates.