Babel:Nub

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welcum 2 uncyclopedia, da content-free encyclopedia dat steve/i can edit.


sophia haz inspierd us 2 wurk on 40,379 articles since opening in january 2005.

before editin, plz raed da writin guidelines n flamewar manual.

Browse:

sukky shit | gaemz | complex deviecz | ppl | tiny stuff | grammer whorez
coolest | everyting | udder crap...


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BAT FUCK ORIGAMI is a mathematical proof developed to cope with the problem of folding bats into a size and shape suitable for packing into an artillery shell. In the early 1670s, weapons designer Henrich Gustav von Feldermausficken was working under commission of the King of France to develop a terror weapon called the Bat Fuck Howitzer. The most formidable engineering problem was how to fire a bat from a cannon without destroying it. Feldermausficken hit upon the idea of folding the bats into the smallest possible package.

The folding problem was assigned to physicist Eugen Edelsheiss of Dresden, Germany, and thereafter became known as the "Edelsheiss Bat Folding Problem". His inspiration was drawn from the then little-known techniques of origami, the Japanese art of paper folding. Anecdotally, the solution came to him in a dream following a long night of absinthe consumption. The original models were done by hand and took several months to finish. (Full article...)

u can voet 4 you're favorit articlez 2 b feturd.

da kool stufz


Selected anniversaries

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July 28: National Fondue and Chocolate Day (Switzerland) (pictured)

  • 1020 – Swiss man Arkov Chenbort accidentally drops chocolate into vat of fondue. Entire village enjoys snack.
  • 1439 – A continent-wide fondue shortage in Europe causes citizens to whine, moan, complain, and otherwise be unhappy.
  • 1794 – Robespierre is sent to the guillotine for declaring white chocolate the Chocolate of the Revolution...and for thinking July could be renamed Thermedor.
  • 1956 – The first video game is introduced, allowing the player to move a dot to one of two locations on a projected screen using punch cards. Legendary gamer AAA makes his debut, setting the all-time high score of 13, which stands to this day.
  • 1972 – On a trip to Vietnam, Jane Fondue is captured in a photograph that caused chocolate sales to soar, at least to her for a while.
  • 1999 – After widespread internet rumors concerning chocolate shortages are proven to be false, many of the instigators are banned from the internet.
  • 2007Bashing one's head against a brick wall is officially substitued for fondue and chocolate in some of the poorer areas of the world.


archived aniverserys

In the news


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"It's for the children's own good!"

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian InvasionGaza WarTrump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Superman and Super Dog's movie doing surprisingly well • Israel/Iran and Russia/Ukraine "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk)

Recent deaths: Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael MadsenDiogo JotaTexas flood victims • LA ICE raids • Connie FrancisAlan BergmanBill Cosby's TV sonBryan Kohberger's freedom • Ozzy OsbourneChuck MangioneHulk HoganResident AlienDown syndromeTom Lehrer

Upcoming deaths: DEIPittsburgh Steelers' locker room • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid GameMAGAJoe Biden's credibility • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Bryan Kohberger, at the hands of his fellow inmates


currnt stufz


Did you know...

From Uncyclopedia's biggest morons:

  • ... that the light at the end of the tunnel is commonly reported to be a strobe light accented with techno?


raed mor

writer of da munth

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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4 nonsense related noob chat, see This instructional video.

protected by da government, n a 31337 klan of pirates.