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From today's featured article
The penis is the primary functioning organ of a male human being, with the brain coming in a close second and the heart in a disappointing third. Penises, or penii, come in many shapes and sizes, all of which are useless to a man unless they are one specific shape and size.
The Bible (Genesis) says that God removed Eve's penis and used it to create Adam. She never forgave Him, nor have her female descendants. (Full article...)
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Did you know...
- ... that Hans Helmuth Saltzman's collection of Camera Obscura images is the best preserved of the Renaissance era? (Pictured)
- ... that Anonymous has written over 4,323,904,528 poems and 23,900,241 short stories, among a million other kinds of written word?
- ... that in 2007 the Department of Homeland Security released a series of informative pamphlets on surviving a terrorist attack?
- ... that no word in the English language rhymes with the word flucumber?
- ... that every single day, we breathe enough air to continue living?
- ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?
- ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten?
- ... that not all of Ukraine is Russia, though Russia can't seem to tell?
In the news
- A*Teens reunite 40 years later
- UnNews' exclusive interview with God (Pictured)
- R.E.M. members reunite, sign gigantic deal
- Patrick eats SpongeBob
- O.J. Simpson to make triumphant return to acting
- Citizen Kane sucks
- John Kerry comes out as a horse
- Supermarket thief: "Donkey Kong told me to"
- Mike Pence turns into a pickle
- It is all happening
- Lady Gaga's dogs stolen, returned
- Björk responds to Anti-Asian violence
- Stan Marsh presents: 2022 FIFA World Cup sucks ass
- Biden responds to North Korea's "Stink" complaints
- BMI songwriters (but not ASCAP) to receive vaccine
- Governor Cuomo from New York is screwed
- Grodin Museum reopens to public
- Old movies are suddenly offensive
- Northeast getting another blizzard
- Just another dead doper and a dirtbag dies
- Marilyn Manson removed from New Radicals hit
- Biden will recognize Hillary as 45th President
On this day
Yes kids - Brick walls can be fun.
September 28: Commemoration of the Brick wall.
- 1200 - Roger Waters places first brick in The Wall.
- 1207 - The first brick wall crumbles. 491 years of darkness ensues.
- 1698 - Brick reinvented by Kevin Costner as a flotation device. Kevin decrees that any major milestone of the brick must henceforth occur on September 26.
- 1699 - Roger Waters put another brick in The Wall.
- 1704 - First 'stack of bricks' discovered at the bottom of Lake Superior, along with Ricki Lake.
- 1837 - Humpty Dumpty trades in brick wall for something a lot more stable.
- 1839 - Mister Angry Waters throw a lot of bricks in The Wall again and again.
- 1917 - Roger Waters puts another fuckin' brick in The Wall.
- 1923 - The Wailing Wall collapses after major flooding caused by millions of pilgrims.
- 1930 - Wall Street crashes due to mortar stocks going through the roof.
- 1989 - Berlin Wall breaks up after discovering their cover version of Canadian Idiot is not popular in America.
- 1997 - Prof. M. Brick invents the 'new' brick wall to commemorate the 299th anniversary of the brick.
- 1998 - Vin Diesel records a special commemorative cover of "Brick House", titled "Brick Shithouse".
- 1999 - WLCPs "Another Brick in the Eye" reaches number 72 in the Billboard Charts.
Picture of the day
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The Grue Crossing signs have proven to be an effective way to prepare drivers for an encounter. Image credit: Kaizer the Bjorn |
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