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Today's Free Sample!The People's Republic of China is a pivotal support mechanism for the retail industry worldwide, although some believe they may have their own agenda. China is populated by perhaps the most resourceful hardworking people on Earth, yet despite some of the strictest social engineering known to man, the Chinese still hog all the best quality crab legs in the buffet rather than waiting in an orderly line. Chinese moms force their babies to play violin until their fingers bleed; the dumb ones learn viola instead. Also, they put a fuck-ton of MSG in their food, which is actually pretty tasty. Everything was invented in China, including gunpowder, paper, the compass, opium, pandas, panda-huffing devices, avian flu, SARS, bat recipes, COVID-19, USA's debt, Amazon Prime and CCTV; you name it, they invented it before anyone else. They also invented rhino horn aphrodisiac powder, Confucianism (a severely autistic, highly regimented version of Filial Piety), kidney harvesting and the Wu Tang Clan. While they didn't invent babies, they do mass produce them deep inside the VaChina. Bada bing! The male babies are then sent to work producing industrial glycine, and the female ones are sent to the streaming mines to post pirated clips of TV shows, except the captions are wrong and the video gets horizontally flipped every 2.7 seconds. (Full article...) You can vote for your favorite articles to be featured when you become an EXCLUSIVE MEMBER. More of the best of Uncyclopedia More can be yours! Join today!November 17: International Celebrate Things That Happened On This Day In The Past Day; Bjorksmas (Iceland).
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Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 and Spaceballs 2 • Russia-Ukraine "peace talks" • ICE/Antifa clashes • Trump and Elon's couples therapy • Jerry Jones screwing the Dallas Cowboys • The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince • Rich New Yorkers fleeing "Mamdani the Commie" Recent deaths: YouTube player's old design • the guitarist and a security guard from KISS • June Lockhart • Nick Mangold • Jamaica • Toronto Blue Jays' World Series dreams • Donna Godchaux • Diane Ladd • Dick Cheney • Mark Butt-fumble's TV career • U.S. Government shutdown (finally!) • Tatsuya Nakadai • Sally Kirkland • The penny Upcoming deaths: Eurovision Song Contest • DEI • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBC • Donald Trump • Coral reefs • NYC's capitalistic economy • Bills Mafia's livers and kidneys after losing horribly to the Miami Dolphins • Weed • Stranger Things
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Exclusive PLUS member of the Month!!!Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so.
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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 41,000 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Plus:!:
| Uncyclopedia English United Kingdom 41,000 |
Desciclopédia Português Brazil 50785 |
アンサイクロペディア 日本語 Japan 19194 |
Nonsensopedia Polski Poland |
Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy |
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| Désencyclopédie Français France |
Inciclopedia Español Spain |
偽基百科 正體中文 Taiwan 6417 |
Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany |
Hikipedia Suomi Finland 7300 |
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| Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. | ||||||
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