Nonsense letters

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NonsenseLetters.png This article contains nonsense letters (J, Q, X, Z).
But you don't need to do anything because the topic of this article is nonsense letters.
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Captain Obvious

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Captain Irrelevant

A typical nonsense letter card.

The nonsense letters are J, Q, X and Z. They make up less than 1% of meaningful English but more than 15% of random sekwences of letters. So they are mainly found in nonsense and that's how they got their name. However, nonsense letters are common in Chinese Pinyin. In Pinyin, J, Q and X represent sounds that do not eksist in native English (Q is used in the borrowed word "qi"), and Z sounds like dz. Nonsense letters are also kwite common in French, mostly found in "je" (meaning "I"), qu- words (they have the same function as the wh- words in English), suffikses -que (this one eksists in English, but is much more common in French), -eux (English translation: -ous), and -ez (the suffiks of what "you" do). In Spanish, the name Don Quixote was designed to include two nonsense letters. In Scrabble, the nonsense letter tiles are commonly referred to as "power tiles" and it is important to use them wisely. The most versatile nonsense tile is the X tile because it can form two-letter words with any of the five vowels.

What is the most nonsensical letter?
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Where you find nonsense letters[edit]

Nonsense words rich in nonsense letters, ranked[edit]

Top 5
Rank Word Proportion of nonsense letters
4 JAZZY 60%
3 ZAX 67%
2 JAZZ 75%
1 ZZZ 100%

All the five nonsense words above contain the letter Z, which is often doubled.

Jazz is the most special of them. If plants listen to too much loud jazz music, they would die or at least get sick. This is because plants are sensitive to the nonsense letters in jazz.

After these, there are at least a dozen of words that are half nonsense letters, many of which being JQXZ two-letter words. They are:

  • AX
  • BUZZ
  • EX
  • FUZZ
  • JINX
  • JO
  • OX
  • QI
  • QUIZ
  • XI
  • XU
  • ZA

Only one-third of them contain Z.

A sample of nonsense that is abundant in nonsense letters[edit]

One of the little more than 1.99999999999999 nonsense letters in Guangzhou Subway.

Guangzhou subway is extremely crowded and actually not that rich in nonsense letters. If you work in Guangzhou and experience it, you'd just quit your job and leave. If you look at this with a quizzical expression, then you are quite sensible.

Reducing nonsense letters[edit]

There is a prefix that takes different forms in different words. Accurate, addiction, affiliate. In ancient times, there were two words ajjective and aqquaintance that have the prefix. But, in an Uncyclopedic spelling reform, they were changed to adjective and acquaintance to reduce the number of nonsense letters.

Conveying information with nonsense letters[edit]

The ASCII approach[edit]

This is based on the kwaternary (base-4) system. Every letter can be ekspressed as 4 nonsense letters. For eksample, the base-10 ASCII code of the letter 'f' is 102. In base-4 it is 1212.

0 1 2 3

So 'f' in nonsense letters would be QXQX. Similarly "fuck" would be QXQX QZQQ QXJZ QXXZ.

The Morse Code approach[edit]

Let J be dot, Q be dash, X be pause between letters. Then "fuck" would be JJQJXJJQXQJQJXQJQ. To make it look better, add some Zs randomly. Then you get something like JJZQJZXJZJQXQZZJQJZXQJZQZ. The pause between words can be encoded as double X.

See also[edit]