Hello, Sapplerx, and thanks for joining Uncyclopedia! Before editing further, please take a gander at our Beginner's Guide. If you want to find out more about Uncyclopedia or need more help with something, check out the following pages:
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If you need help, feel free to ask me on my talk page, post on our community forum, join our Discord, or message an administrator on their talk page. Additionally, our Adopt-a-Noob program can bring experienced editors straight to you. Simply leave a message on an adopter's talkpage to join. I hope you enjoy editing here and being an Uncyclopedian! 18:12, 15 August 2022 (UTC)
thx dude for the help i has adhd so i wouldn't understand much or pay attention but i'll try my best（＝〜＝）
Hey, sorry about that. No, Vocaloid is not a banned subject, and your article looks pretty good so far. The abuse filter blocked you cuz it does that sometimes. I changed your user rights to confirmed user, so you should be able to go ahead and create that article finally. Let me know if you have any questions. Cheers. MrXblow me 22:30, 15 August 2022 (UTC)
Vocaloid, fuck yeah!—🐆Crocotta1🐆 (talk) 23:49, 15 August 2022 (UTC)
Just look at the character and give an animal.—Crocotta1 13:42, 27 August 2022 (UTC)
Should I create another UnTunes Verified episode?[edit source]
I thought of creating a second episode but I wanted to get someone's permission before doing so --+-=÷x Sapplerx x÷=-+ (talk) 19:22, 14 December 2022 (UTC)
Hahaha! I'm not just a Nazi. I'm actually a Grammar Nazi, though. --+-=÷x Sapplerx x÷=-+ (talk) 22:04, 20 January 2023 (UTC)
Grammar Nazis I canhandle, but not n*zis. (note the lower case n. That is what I think about them) — L10nM4st3rROAR at me! / What my paws scratched 22:09, 20 January 2023 (UTC)
It adds a tab to the top of the screen to report users, when looking at their contributions page or any page within their userspace. Want to give it a go? Add mw.loader.load('//en.wikibooks.org/w/index.php?title=User:L10nM4st3r/ReportUser.js&action=raw&ctype=text/javascript'); to Special:MyPage/common.js. The source code is here. I'm quite proud of it! (Just be careful if you use it and is suddenly stops working. If it does, tell me) — L10nM4st3rROAR at me! / What my paws scratched 17:40, 24 January 2023 (UTC)
I dont. Dont ask. I dont want to know what else goes in the heads of furries.... If this is the best of it, im content not knowing. — L10nM4st3rROAR at me! / What my paws scratched 08:29, 12 September 2023 (UTC)
Sanjay go pee pee in his diaper for me.—Crocotta1 01:49, 22 February 2023 (UTC)
Me, slaying hundreds of helpless guardians in minecraft for xp. Oh, using a mob grinder machine, not my fists. — L10nM4st3rROAR at me! / What my paws scratched 21:18, 3 March 2023 (UTC)
You have been blocked from editing for a period of forever and ever for having a very, very memeified user page. (ALSO IM STEALING). If you think there are good reasons for being unblocked, please write them down on a pineapple and shove it right up your ass. Once the block has expired, you are welcome to make useful contributions, but it is highly recommended that you stop having a very, very memeified user page. (ALSO IM STEALING). Thaaanks! --
UnSignpost delivery for March 19, 2023[edit source]
Over on the Uncyclopedia Discord, PF4Eva commonly makes references to stuff that ARandomPage doesn't know about. This causes ARandomPage to get confused, which thus confuses PF4 over how Page doesn't seem to know anything about the sort of stuff he's referencing, once saying that "he's probably the only person outside of my family who's this oblivious" and that he's "half-expecting him to ask us what the sun is". Kippy then remarked that Page ruins comedic flow worse than PF4 (PF4 ruins comedic flow by following a joke up with a worse joke or pop culture reference, Page ruins comedic flow by taking things seriously and making Kippy spend several minutes explaining it and trying to salvage the joke's comedic potential). This confusion from Page happens in many other situations as well, causing "AwhRyan" (who doesn't have an account here but is on the Uncyc Discord) to think that his cluelessness is an act. Spoiler alert: My confusion and cluelessness is (usually) not an act.
Zombiebaron wants to propose the creation of an Uncyclopedia Arbitration Committee next month
Just under a week ago, Zombiebaron, the baron of zombies, said in the Uncyclopedia Discord that he plans to propose an Uncyclopedia Arbitration Committee in next month's VFS vote. ARandomPage commented that he felt like Uncyclopedia is too small to make such a thing a good idea, as well that it would probably just be more useless bureaucracy. Zombiebaron then said that Uncyclopedia, being a Wikipedia parody, should parody useless bureaucracy as well, which... fair enough, I suppose. Page then questioned if an UnArbCom would even help anything, and Kippy said that UnArbCom's parody name should be the "Arbitrary Committee", which is a name ARandomPage found quite funny (and descriptive). Page then expressed fear over how important ArbCom decisions could be, which was quickly removed when Page actually read about what an ArbCom usually does.
Biopic
I have no idea how to write biopics. I also don't know why we have them in the first place.
From The Logs
March 14, 2023: Kippy protected User:Kippy [Edit=Allow only administrators] (indefinite) [Move=Allow only administrators] (indefinite) (Excessive spamming)
Apple pie has gluten, btw. So yea, gluten free diet. After getting told about the symptoms, im like "damn, no wonder I look like a stick". On the bright side, the bread tastes better, not as toast, but in sandwitches. — L10nM4st3rROAR at me! / What my paws scratched 21:47, 8 April 2023 (UTC)
I WANT YOU FOR THE UNCYCLOPEDIA MARSHALS SERVICE![edit source]
I want you for the Uncyclopedia Marshals Service! You have been invited to join the Uncyclopedia Marshals Service! If you choose to accept, you will recieve a free pair of aviators and free donuts. Let's make Uncyclopedia even better!
Feather in Your Cap Award This person has done something very helpful for Uncyclopedia, and thus is deserving of a Feather in their Cap. Respect this person.
I was planning to give you something like this way earlier (probably last month or the one before that again) but i forgot. Anyway, here you go. 16:13, 12 August 2023 (UTC)
You have successfully usurped the role of UNCYCLOPEDIA ADMINISTRATOR. Enjoy the extra buttons and try not to burn the place down. Cheers. MrXblow me 22:41, 31 October 2023 (UTC)
Congratulations! ㄧ (T | Meow!) 13:05, 1 November 2023 (UTC)
Hi buddy there, sorry if i delete your editing to my article, but P!nk is not bat insane as you would say, she's his persona, and she is really open about his issues and personal life, but not in a crazy way. I hope you understand my statement and don't take offense of what i did. Sorry in advance, and i still okay with this. Everyone has his right to opinion, and not of offense. – Preceding unsigned comment added by BarbieLover (talk • contribs)
Pink is the most ugly colour in existance.
Red is the best. Purple is somewhere in the middle near black. Black and purple really gives an evil vibe. L10nM4st3rROAR at me! / What my paws scratched 09:43, 8 December 2023 (UTC)
I will not stand for this pink slander! 15:24, 8 December 2023 (UTC)
Congratulations on the promotion to UN-admin! Try not to make your takeover too hostile (we still haven't cleaned up from MrX' promotion, lol)! --RadicalRocko❤ (I'm listening...) 18:44, 7 December 2023 (UTC)
Thanks for unblocking me, but the thing is I'm a vandal. But hold on, before you block me again, I DON'T want to be a vandal anymore.– Preceding unsigned comment added by I Like Jolteon (talk • contribs)
May I have permission to edit UnGames:Main Page/Game List? It won't allow me to edit it because whenever I try to, it says that only registered users can edit it, even though I am a registered user. A little help?--Fenris2010 (talk) 20:21, 5 May 2024 (UTC)User:Fenris2010
By "registered user" it means autoconfirmed ones, which you aren't. So i just made you an confirmed user, which gives you the exact same permissions, so you should be able to edit that list now. 08:38, 6 May 2024 (UTC)
I can't create my own page on my new router. Help! Maybe make it so when I create a username I can select the IP addresses I previously was?
In this game that I'm making, why does it say "Zork" at the top? Also, how do I add WikiText to templates? I thought that there was supposed to be a toolbar, but there isn't. --Fenris2010 (talk) 14:14, 12 June 2024 (UTC)Fenris2010
So, I see my new article gained an ICU stamp. Most of the things that it should have are already there. Did you add the tag only because it needs an image or two, then? TabletGenesis (talk) 22:26, 15 October 2024 (UTC)TabletGenesis
@TabletGenesis: eh, it still is kind of short. Maybe you should try adding a bit more. But think before you add stuff instead of adding for the sake of adding or it might gain another ICU for being too random. That's my suggestion. Also, don't put your comment at the top of their talkpage... DaniPine3 (talk) 22:31, 15 October 2024 (UTC)
Another suggestion: you could ask the admin if they could place a stub template instead of an ICU one. That way, your article won't have a time limit in terms of expanding it. Maybe if you add some pictures, they'll reconsider...DaniPine3 (talk) 22:44, 15 October 2024 (UTC)
Oki. Do you thing any image that could be related to the article counts? I read the ICU template, I have all the things except images and..."tables". But there are very few, maybe NO articles with tables on Uncyclopedia from what I've seen, so I guess it's de facto not necessary? TabletGenesis (talk) 22:12, 16 October 2024 (UTC)TabletGenesis
I think that some of the files that I had moved were deleted, when it was only the redirects that were meant to be targeted. Perhaps it is only due to the extremely fast pace of my edits, or how I did not break the redirect link in time, that the files themselves were deleted instead of the size parameter redirects such as 180px/250px.
For the three most recent deletions, each image had the Star Destroyer as its main focus, and the corresponding files were mostly salvaged from [Wookiepedia]. What I mainly want to do here is to give the readers the best view of the contents on this (funny/humourous) encyclopedia, including larger copies of files that, when hosted here, are still named as obviously tiny copies of the 'real thing' - transferred across by someone who does not even know how to extract the largest copy of a picture.
There might be far more of these issues when especially concerning the Category:Flags, but if the flag pictures end up being deleted, it could break a lot of links to their respective countries - is it possible to target the redirects on your end, or did you only delete the file that the link itself redirected to? There might have been a minor mix-up, but it can be solved simply by checking Special:Log/delete or Special:WantedFiles.
QaZWsXEdCRfVTgBYhNUjM: found a few days ago that my article was tagged with icu by you, so i would like to know what I did wrong and how i can improve the article.
article link because convenience: KCIS– Preceding unsigned comment added by QaZWsXEdCRfVTgBYhNUjM (talk • contribs)
Sorry to ask, but why have you been making so many redirects lately? Have you been possessed by Wikipedia Be Sucking or something? Oᑭöᔑᔑᙀᙏ (addicted) 18:33, 6 January 2025 (UTC)
I've been creating redirects based on this particular Wikipedia page about articles with unusual titles that were deleted. If the article doesn't exist on Uncyclopedia, I won't make that redirect. If the article in question is a redirect, I also won't make that either. --+-=÷x Sapplerx x÷=-+ (talk) 18:35, 6 January 2025 (UTC)
Link is here to do the test
You have a test that is time each month. And for March 2025, we have this one up here that is 4 questions. You have 45 seconds to guess what each question's answer is.
Hello – I wrote an article earlier under my account space, and it's my first. It's about a made up historical figure in the world of music. Because my account is very new, I was prevented from publishing due to some spam filtering because it believes it to fall under "Promotional articles about persons". Is there anything I can do to unblock this? Thanks – Preceding unsigned comment added by Tim-grand (talk • contribs)
Don't take this too seriously. Coffi just wants to let you know that you did something silly, which may or may not include Having a BETTER SIG than mine!
Editing the queue whilst featuring articles[edit source]
Hey, if you notice someone featuring articles, its better to give them a good long time window before editing the feature page, it's interfered with the featuring of the article and I may now have to replicate the nom page to get it back up again. ShabiDOO 23:55, 3 August 2025 (UTC)
Actualy never mind, I'm talking bullshit. Your edit was way before mine. I seemed to get an edit conflict for some reason in between featuring the Hitler one and the Ackbar one, insinuating you had edited it inbetween. Not sure what on Earth happened, so yeah, ignore what I said. You are a trusted, loved and valued member of the team, and your balls are almost as big as MrX's. ShabiDOO 00:01, 4 August 2025 (UTC)
The UnSignpost has yet again been necromanced. This time, it's by some dickbag nobody cares about. And now, a recap of the past 2 years! The ASBOxAAT Series starts, explodes in popularity, gets vandalized, and a few get deleted. We also somehow manage to make a "Worst 100 Reflections" article two years in a row, for the first time in a decade. Hey, that's when the last good UnSignpost came out!
In a shocking turn of events, the Kansas City Chiefs Are 0-2 at the time of writing. Looks like Taylor Swift got engaged to the whole team. Yes, that means the 2-Super-Bowl-in-a-row-team-that-did-it-without-cheating[citation needed] is now on par with the Detroit Lions. Who are somehow 1-1 against Green Bay and Chicago. Actually, that makes a lot of sense for ANY OTHER TEAM EVER.
Biopic
The OPOSSUM (Didelphis vespertilio futuere insanum) is a species of opossums native to southern California. It is remarkably smarter[citation needed] than other species of opossums, averaging at the intelligence of an adult corvid. It has recently found itself at the center of an enviromental crisis as they were "accidentally" introduced to Oregon a couple of years ago, from which they spread throughout the remainder of the North American west coast at an alarming pace, threatening to destroy tons of ecosystems not accustomed to their Bat Fuck Insane hivemind tactics.
...this is how you write a biopic, right? I'm just gonna assume that the answer is "yes".
From The Logs
16 September 2025: DaniPine3 blocked SRN01 with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (Wanker: i am neurodivergent please tolerate my ban)
DaniPine3 huffed page File:Tuff diddy blud mango those who know 67 41 phonk listener effoc adrian .png (huh, it's not as interesting as I expected... it's just a scary trollface... kinda dissapointed ngl)
The UnSignpost is now run by LaziBums (just not the LaziBum). We apologize for the loss of any semblance of quality that might or might've not existed beforehand.
Man, Nebraska sucks. Think about it. They provide nothing but milk, and I can go get milk at home anyways or something. Wait... no I can't. Point is, there's other sources of cow milk or whatever. And besides, other people can make milk too! Not to mention Kansas or South Dakota, who could all easily make more milk than Nebraska if we just sink Nebraska into the sea and move all of Nebraska's population into the other states. Fuck Nebraska!
In a shocking twist of events, the UnSignpost's monopoly on bullshit news is under a nonexistent threat. Theultimategergdown's "Gerg's Shitroom" is "a shittier version of the UnSignpost" that only he can edit. I smell perverted bullshittery! To be fair, I don't have a great sense of smell. Fuck you. Also, what's with this weird line? Yeah, that one. On the right. Other right, retard!
As Hurricane Humberto becomes the latest Cabo Verde swing-and-miss, Tropical Storm Imelda brews north of the Bahamas. Forecast to begin affecting Bermuda as a hurricane this afternoon.
As of earlier this morning, Alula has opened up VFS. Let the shitstorm begin. RealDonaldTrump has jumped out to an early lead.
Biopic
The Olula is a Frankenstein-esque monster created by duct-taping the head of an Alula to the body of an OPOSSUM. The brain power of an Olula is very weak, as they only know hot to say one phrase, "“HIPPITY HOPPITY SHMIPPITY SHMOPPITY PIPPITY POPPITY FLIPPITY FLOPPITY SCRIPPITY SCROP-" OH GOD GET THE CUCUMBERS!
We just got over Gerg's Shitroom existing[1], and now we have yet another competitor.TropicalPanther's "New Tropical Times" has arrived on the newspaper scene this last Sunday. Damn it, I wanted the cool job nobody else had! And seriously, what's with this line? L10N! GET IN HERE AND FIX THIS!
We have a socker! Wikicreator2562 is a rampant sockpuppeteer. With 5 confirmed socks, be on the lookout for any article on the fictional piece of bullshit Cherbia, or anything concerning the HowTo Store.
Biopic
Gergdown, formerly Theultimategergdown, is the creator of articles such as Lawrencium, as well as Make it to Ketchikan's Vancouverite Sojourn, is one of the only Canadian Uncyclopedian still around. Gergdown is also the author of Gerg's Shitroom. Go read that. Nothing happens here.
""""Who wants to see some absoloute dogshit soon" -Turb0-Sunrise" -Gergdown", after responding to the quote from Issue 5, "who wants to hear some absoloute dogshit soon" — Turb0-Sunrise"-Gergdown
A new forum topic, Ask Turb0, has opened up. The forum allows people like you to ask Turb0-Sunrise questions about anything. that's right, anything. The top 5 questions each week get on the USP. Like, we need questions. Please.
Gerg's Shitroom author Gergdown and I are considering a merger. Does this really matter? No. Will anything change? No. And the merger actually happened. Will the world implode? Find out next on Uncyclopedia: The Soap Opera!
Within the past month or so, several new users have popped up. Soviet, Teh Epik Duck, DestructiveCriticism, and LavaLampDrinker, just to name a few. Is this the Uncyclopedia comeback we've been waiting for for the past 12 years or so? Or is it false hope? Only time will tell.
Biopic
Soviet, one of the newest users on the site, has been a prime contributer to the ASBOxAAT series, notably helping black out the whole canvas in the small version of ASBOPAAT, and creating a large Canada leaf that Fish better not turn purple! in the big version.
What are some of the best hiking trails on the Presidential Range? -OPOSSUM — [nil {{{u1}}}]
In short, Jewell Trail, Tuckerman Ravine Trail, and the Crawford Path.
Which is more versatile, big sticks or pool noodles? -OPOSSUM again — [nil {{{u2}}}]
Big sticks, as they can be used for all things pool noodles can be used for, save cannons.
U got a big stick? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) -OPOSSUM yet again — [nil {{{u3}}}]
Perchance.
why do you guys in new england call shit different things, why do you call water coolers "bubblers", why do you guys call "cold" as 31*F and not -1*C, ect. -Gergdown surprisingly — [nil {{{u4}}}]
I don't know about the bubbler thing, but we do call remote controls "clickers" up here. And -1*c is basically the same as 31*f, so it's about the same.
How many hours of sleep do you get? -Soviet — [nil {{{u5}}}]
The 2025 Atlantic hurricane season's newest fuck-buddy, TropicalPanther Storm Melissa, has formed, and is expected to hit just about anywhere from Costa Rica to Florida. Give it to Florida! HIT MIAMI! Or just do nothing and give some Caribbeans a bath whether they like it or not.
TropicalPanther's newest childish obsession, the furry/musician[citation needed] Yonkagor, is getting out of hand. Panther's escapades include attempting to turn LPTEW into a forum about it, among other things. What Panther doesn't realize, is that even though I've never even heard of it, I can already tell that it sucks.
Notable[look it up yourself] user Gergdown has been nommed for adminship by yours truly. It's not going so well. Somehow, it sits at 0, and get this: Gerg hasn't even voted for himself yet.
"Erm, actually, if you check everybody's noms on VFS, nobody actually has voted for themselves yet 🤓 also give me half an year and then nom me again 🤓 🤓 🤓" — Gergdown
The epidemic of spooky signs is almost over, hopefully. It all started when I made up a new "spookysig" featuring purple and orange as opposed to my normal eye-burning pink, Hatsune Miku blue, and neon brown. Turb0-SunSpookrise, Esquire joined in the fun when he made up his own spooky signature. A newcomer, Teh Epik Duck, also made a spooky signature, rebranding himself as Teh Spooky Duck and putting an additional color in there, green. Who will be the next to become spooky? ALL-CAPS MARSUPIAL? Oneshot Bird, perhaps? Maybe even Daniel Pinus the 3rd? Anything goes when it's spooky sig season!
Local hozer and resident dumbass Gergdown has finally done something useful for Onwards to Boston, uploading probably one of the best songs ever, "Dirty Water" by The Standells. You can listen right over there on the right.
After stealing various stuff from Gerg, Turb0-Sunrise's user and talk pages actually kick ass now. Seriously. Go look at them. The talk page header is particularly nice. Gerg's headers are neat too. Check those out.
Apparently, many users are not who they think they are. According to Gerg, Alula and DaniPine3 are the same person, Opossum is ASSGORE DREEMURR, Big MOCCASIN Billy is the Friend Inside Me, Knife Guy is THE ROARING KNIGHT, and I'm Toby Fox. Ask him about it.
what do you plan on doing for the rest of your uncyclopedian career? -Gergdown — [nil {{{u1}}}]
Your mom!
if i were to turn you into a bigfin squid would you become Turb0-Squidrise? -number dude — [nil {{{u2}}}]
bluug blorp blub.
the vancouverite sojourn paradox: since vancouverite sojourn has music, templates, and images, and has more pages than efo, is it technically mitk 2.5? -gerg — [nil {{{u3}}}]
“Yeah peepee poopoo bitch, you're a person who got divorced by Tony fucking Montana.” -Gergdown
If you are over 18 and a smoking hot firefighter, you could also piss on me. -Shabidoo
THIS IS NOT A DRILL!! TropicalPanther, probably the luckiest user on the site[2] had been banned. This came after repeatedly creating a sucky UnNews. Originally allowed talkpage access, Panther then threatened to SUE Uncyclopedia. First off, for what? Second off, with what lawyer?
Along with several random user's pages,[3] some dick of an IP decided to go on a vandal spree.
It was about 10:30 PM ETC. Me, Gerg, Zorua, and OPOSSUM were the only ones awake. Suddenly, racoons vandalism. Some IP "blanking" pages with a clever bit of wikitext. Then it escalated. Quickly. Full-on blankings, calling us cunts, and a whole shit-ton of other stuff. Fun times.
09:47, 18 November 2025 DaniPine3 blocked DaniPine3 with an expiration time of 5 seconds (autoblock disabled) (requested by Turb0-Sunrise: i'm a prick who edit conflicts people for no good reason)
10:04, 16 November 2025 Alula blocked TropicalPanther with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) (don't say i didn't warn you)
00:14, 19 November 2025 Alula changed block settings for TropicalPanther with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (making legal threaths and stuff)
Eh, it's been mostly quiet over the past week or so. LPTEW got archived, I made some new sigs, the Yankees still suck, and everybody's having a gay fun old time.
Rounded to the nearest millennium, how old are you? — Fish on skates
0
From The Logs
09:47, 18 November 2025 DaniPine3 blocked DaniPine3 with an expiration time of 5 seconds (autoblock disabled) (requested by Turb0-Sunrise: i'm a prick who edit conflicts people for no good reason)
10:04, 16 November 2025 Alula blocked TropicalPanther with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) (don't say i didn't warn you)
00:14, 19 November 2025 Alula changed block settings for TropicalPanther with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (making legal threaths and stuff)
The UnSignpost wants writers, just like YOU! Please message Head ShitslingerTM Turb0-Sunrise here. You get a pair of gloves so your hands don't smell, as well as a chance to get looked at funny by your peers. Offer stands until Christmas, so hurry your ass up and get in here!
Man, where is all the action lately? It's so quiet around here. We have 180 "active" editors, but nothing's happening. I guess a MITK page got vandalized. Gerg updated the Shitroom design, but other than that, nothing really.
RealDonaldTrump, resident President and one of our template experts, managed to break a very important template. After making an edit to Template:Big, something happened. Hundreds of pages only displaying numbers where there once was big text. After a message to Alula, it was fixed and now everything is fine again.[citation needed]
We've switched to a new numerical system for identifying issues. It should work better for me, and also cuts down on bytes when messaging, albeit only by a few.
Repeating the trend from October with the spooky signatures, Fish on skates has made her own Christmas-themed signature that looks suspiciously like DaniPine3's uhh... year-round signature. And, also repeating the trend, Turb0-Sunrise has come out with a "Christmas" signature of his own, suspiciously shortly after Fish showed hers off. OPOSSUM has also jumped on the bandwagon with a popup sig featuring, among other things, the disclosure of a relationship with Krampus and the accusation of presumed-dead user Squaw Dee being Santa's ninth reindeer.
Resident no-lifer and hockey lover Gergdown has been nominated for UOTM after RealDonaldTrump's smashing success last month. The outcome looks good so far, but you never know what can change in a month. Will Gerg be the last UOTM of 2025? Will a new contender rise to the challenge? Will the author stop talking like the back cover of a book? You'll just have to wait and see.
If pigs flew and I ran for admin, what would you vote? — Fish on skates
You can vote for multiple people, you know that?
From The Logs
23:56, 3 December 2025 DaniPine3 (talk | contribs) blocked Fish on skates (talk | contribs) with an expiration time of 3 seconds (account creation disabled, autoblock disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (Turb0 told me to (for making a fatal grammatical mistake))
Just when we least expected it, Walbro has come back and created two new articles with ridiculously long titles mentioning Donald Trump and MrX. Turb0-Sunrise listed both for QVFD and told all on LPTEW, saying that he "FUCKIN' PREDICTED IT". Worst 100 Reflections on 2025 was updated accordingly.
Remember the first issue I wrote, when I said, "Looks like Taylor Swift got engaged to the whole team"? Well there may need to be a breakup song soon. Interception, boom, they're out of the playoffs. Suck it, walrus.
Recently, 6-7 on Uncyclopedia has been getting out of hand. It first started with 6-7 UnNews articles then the 6-7 article and finally the Forum to ban 6-7. The banning of 6-7 was decided by a vote with three 6-7 opposers arguing that there was way too much 6-7 and three people for 6-7. Thus 6-7 stayed.
On A story built one word at a time, relative newcomer and drug dealer Gammakid999 mentioned me, yes ME in their edit summaries, asking why I got blocked and where the UnSignpost was. This makes two times that I have been mentioned by name in ASBOWAAT. And yes, I did get blocked again. I requested it just like Gerg did when he took an uncyclobreak.
Biopic
Let me tell you a story. A story about a town down on the river, where there's a bunch of Dirty Water. You see, this area is home to the species known as Turb0s. This species is also commonly found in ASBOSAAT. It is a yellow sphere with hairy legs, huge penises, and a big blue cap. GO SOX! FUCK THE YANKEES! YANKEES SUCK!
18:22, 13 December 2025 DaniPine3 (talk | contribs) protected 6-7 (meme) [Edit=Allow only autoconfirmed users] (indefinite) [Move=Allow only autoconfirmed users] (indefinite) (preventing potential vandalism from 6 to 7 years old kids)
"Vandalism. This vandalism only exists to increase the number of people who have vandalized this page. If I do get banned, then there will be a ratio of 6:3. If I don't get banned, there will be a ratio of 6:2. I'm Gerg, and I vandalized Turb0's user page. Not because of any spite, but because I wanted to increase the number of people who have vandalized this page (6). In fact, thank you Turb0 for editing my article (Edit farm). Well, I'm not Gerg. I have body swapped with a 10 year old. I don't know where I am, but I hate it here. I'm 10, and I miss my mommy. I love the parts of movies that contain feet. That's right, I'm 10 and I'm horny for feet. I ejaculate, and I'm 10! Sadly, in this body, I feel like I'm about to puke it after I said that, meaning that this person that I've swapped with needs to improve their horniness positivity. Oh well. How long can I extend this manifesto? Oh well. Ass. Ass. Ass. Boobies. Aw dang, it's getting late, mate! Oh well. Is Turb0 even awake? Who knows! Can he even revert this? Who knows!
On December 16 or 17, I asked DaniPine3 to block me until the 19th because reasons. However, I had not accounted for who would deliver the UnSignpost, figuring Turb0-Sunrise would do it. Little did I know, Turb0 had taken his name off the paperbots list, leaving me as the sole UnSignpost deliverer. This was appropriately reacted to by several editors. And might I remind you that when you sign up for UnSignpost home delivery by putting the template on your talk page, you agree not to sue?
I've been here only a few months, but these few have been amazing. Lots of laughs, 5 featured articles, YANKEES SUCK, and so much more.
Through hundreds of rollbacks, so much has changed since July. New users, A fewoldones coming back, and a whole lot of moccasins. As the sun sets on another year, do remember that I'm under the mistletoe right now. :3
Lovingly yours,[nuh uh]
It's been a wild 20th year of Uncyclopedia. Several new people joining, the continued making and purging of ASBOWAATs, tons upon tons of Deltarot (Deltarune brainrot), the return of the UnSignpost, memes abound, YANKEES SUCK!, and The Daily News.
THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!!! Two people who haven't been heard from in a while have started editing Uncyclopedia again. Funnily enough, Page continues to describe herself as an "UnSignpost everythinger", a title which would be more fitting for Turb0 or Fish at this point.
Priest Goofball is the main boss of Deltarune chapter 4. His hobbies include chess, preaching, and being the main boss of Deltarune chapter 4. Did I mention that he's the main boss of Deltarune chapter 4?
18:32, 28 December 2025 DaniPine3 (talkcontribs) changed block settings for Gergdown (talk | contribs) with an expiration time of 15:26, 31 December 2025 (account creation disabled) (asked for it (again))
The Daily News is officially in print... well, not print. You get the point. Put {{The Daily News}} on your talk page to get daily spam in addition to your weekly spam!
Quote(s) of the Week
“Disobedience, in the eyes of any one who has read history, is man’s original virtue. It is through disobedience that progress has been made, through disobedience and through rebellion.”
After having my the UnSignpost stolen revived by Turb0-Sunrise and Fish on skates, going on monthly month-long hiatuses for 3 years (what do you mean it's been 3 years since I was active???), and forgetting Uncyclopedia's existence despite frequently lurking in its discord server, I have forgotten how to write an UnSignpost. How do I use the template (which I myself modified back in 2022)? What do all these inputs mean? How do I write things? I'm quite sure the UnSignpost wrapper used to be centered! What's even happening in this site these days? AAAAAAAAA!
Anyway, it should be January 2026 for everyone here, right? ... Right? So, first UnSignpost of the year goes to me. I sure do love collecting meaningless achievements and titles!
...gosh, what do I even do here anymore? What am I allowed to put in this signpost, again?
As it is now 2026, the possibility for tomorrow to be the release day of Deltarune Chapter 5 has become existent once more. Despite the halfway mark of their game having been attained, new chapters are not likely to stop the insanity of Deltarune fans. Assuming Chapter 5 is not shadow-dropped and instead has a release date announced, the world will once again have a day where "tomorrow" means "the day after today" instead of "the day a new chapter of Deltarune releases". Once that happens, there will only be up to 2 Deltarune Tomorrows until the world's concept of tomorrow returns to something that doesn't always mean Deltarune.
Biopic
I don't know what a biopic is
From The Logs
*plant noises.ogg*
*animal noises.ogg*
Oh, it meant stuff like Special:Log and stuff. Well, gotta use these sounds I recorded from inside a literal log somehow. We're keeping it in.
Holy. Fucking. FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!
With the new year comes the yearly awards. The scramble of the top 10. The xOTY nominations.
Alright, let's get the fuck down to business.
First off, I have a UOTM nomination open. I have 7 votes already. side note, you should vote for me. side note over.
Now, I have a UOTY too. But that's not the end of it. don't waste your time here
Some dude Turb0-Sunrise has officially got 10,000 edits as of January 6, 2026. He's only been on here for like 5 months. To put that in perspective, Alula has been around since late 2021 and has around 30,000 edits. You do the math.
ColonelKurtz, who took an involuntary unbreak back in October, has returned. Here's hoping he learned from whatever brought on that involuntary break!
Biopic
This biopic is about biopics. There are many different ways to write them, but I'm trying out writing them in the style of ARandomPage, who half the time treats this section as another story. I'm lazy, etc. On to the fanmail!
Continuing on the "was here" userbox trend where people make userboxes saying they were here, Gammakid999, MK, and L10nM4st3r have userboxes of their own.
OPOSSUM made a contest for the title of "Moccasin Man" because he's done with moccasins.Soviet's Bot won by putting the most moccasins on OPOSSUM's userpage.
US President RealDonaldTrump made Testing the VFH widget (again) (do not feature!), a page that was meant to test some new feature. Turb0 then voted on its VFH page, with many others including me and several admins voting. Because I think I'm sooo clever, I made a VFH page for the VFH. And because Turbs also thinks he's soooo clever, he made a VFH page for that, and a VFH page for that. Gergdown also contributed somewhat to the joke. Alula later deleted the test page and closed all of the nominations.
Biopic
Cassie, also known as Cassandra, is a bureaucrat I'm pretty sure, and has been around for a long time. Anyway, she's not dead. Pretty sure. She's on the active users template and I hope she stays a while.
19:05, 14 January 2026 Alula (talk | contribs) blocked Turb0-Sunrise (talk | contribs) with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) (clearly learnt his lesson from last time. oh wait)
Abuse filter blocked MK with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) (Blocked by abuse filter. Description of matched rule: Mandatory cancellation)
Just before the infobox, it says "beleiving in religion again", when it should be "believing in religion again" 2A02:1388:408A:F351:0:0:FA58:B887 (talk) 11:41, 17 January 2026 (UTC)
Driving in my car right after an UnSignpost[edit source]
L10nM4st3r and DaniPine3 blocked each other and unblocked themselves a lot. The entertaining edit summaries were "Not banned enough yet", "blocking me when i did nothing >:[", ">:]", "Finger slipped", "Finger slipped again", and "banged my head on the keyboard". See for yourself.
You, yes YOU, can rank some Uncyclopedian-made songs! Part of the hit albums Make it to Ketchikan and Bust into Boston these noises you hear before you can be ranked for the second time! So what are you waiting for?
Biopic
In the span of some time that I'm too lazy to count, Deemox has gone from a total noob to a slightly less total noob. He's already made an article and in my humble opinion has quite a lot of potential.
Are the allegations true? I'm not going to elaborate, for comedic effect. — Gammakid999
yes and no at the same time
favorite non-ASBOWAAT article that you didn't write — Fish on skates
uhh get back to me on that one
From The Logs
20:20, 19 January 2026 L10nM4st3r blocked DaniPine3 with an expiration time of 10 minutes (account creation disabled, autoblock disabled) (Not banned enough yet)
20:21, 19 January 2026 DaniPine3 blocked L10nM4st3r with an expiration time of 10 seconds (account creation disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (blocking me when I did nothing >:[)
Gergdown has unleashed an "Agenda 2026" that aims to make Uncyclopedia great again, one edit at a time. This plan has quite a few people onboard already, probably because people will join anything advertised in a big fancy box.
"Newcomer" and Wikipedia sock puppeteer has finally gotten unbanned after socking and vandalism. Three months ago, Teh Epik Duck consistently vandalised talk pages, forums and encyclopedic articles before being banned by Alula for being a dick.
In an attempt to bypass his ban, Teh Epik Duck told Alula
“Unblock me now you retard.”
– Teh Epik Duck
clearly showing this was his masterstroke. He resorted to socking but was quickly banned for an extended period of three months.
However, Duck requested his userpage and subpages be deleted as he has retired. Miss him, miss him.
Time's running out to vote for the xOTY awards and the top 10 articles of 2025! So what are you waiting for? Get your LaziBum to the polls and be opinionated!
01:52, 26 January 2026 DaniPine3 blocked Fish on skates with an expiration time of 1 minute and 40 seconds (account creation disabled, autoblock disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (suggesting that I, an ADMIN, should get banned. this is clearly conspiracy against the [totally non-existent] cabal!!!)
02:18, 26 January 2026 DaniPine3 blocked Fish on skates with an expiration time of 1 minute and 41 seconds (account creation disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (idea of Turb0-Sunrise (plus, you edit conflicted on my own talkpage!!!!))
00:32, 28 January 2026 DaniPine3 huffed page Your Article Name(wtf is this: content was: " == The Bee Movie Script == {{", and the only contributor was "Soviet's Bot")
there was a whole day that people couldn't vote because of the servers being down. don't you think it'd be fair to push the deadline a day later? 🎄🎄🎄DaniPine3 (talk)🎄🎄🎄 20:34, 1 February 2026 (UTC)
Sure then --🩷 Sapplerx (talk) 🩷 20:35, 1 February 2026 (UTC)
At the end of January, the server of en.uncyclopedia.co went down. This led a bunch of people (Alula, Fish on skates, Gergdown, Turb0-Sunrise, Soviet, and RealDonaldTrump), to join the spoon and discover that Spike is a sockpuppet of OPOSSUM. The spoon's LPTEW also received a spike in activity as everybody from the fork scrambled to figure out what the heck was going on. Fish tried reaching out to Alula through wplace about what would happen to the Top 10 voting, which was extended a day to account for the server outage. The construction tag deadlines on multiple articles were also extended by a few days too.
It all started when our resident potatochopper and weeb MK hid the edit buttons on her userpage so no one could edit it. I, thinking I'm so clever, found an actual use for the visual editor and used it to prove I could still edit. This escalated into a vandalism contest much like the one OPOSSUM held, and even spread to pages like her editnotice and her signature. This is what the userpage looked like at the end of the silliness.
What do you think of saying "archibe" instead of "archive"? — Soviet
archibe
From The Logs
(spoon) 16:39, 31 January 2026 Spike blocked RealDonaldTrump with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (You can't do that)
00:28, 2 February 2026 RealDonaldTrump blocked SPIKE with an expiration time of 4 millennia, 9 centuries, 9 decades, 9 years, 364 days, 17 hours, 49 minutes and 12 seconds (account creation disabled, email disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (You're not allowed to do that)
08:31, 2 February 2026 L10nM4st3r changed block settings for L10nM4st3r with an expiration time of 21:58, 1 February 9025 (account creation disabled) (Not banned enough yet)
This isn't a joke. We actually VFD'd an FA! Taylor Swift's "psy-op", an article[duh] created by alleged AI-writer Tranvit, has been fuckedbaleeted tossed down that super deep hole in Russia or wherever it is on VFD. MrX briefly lost his shit over it, before everybody seemingly forgot about it all. What were we talking about?
On LPTEW, Fish on skates started complaining about Turb0-Sunrise's constant edit conflicts. Both of them complained like 5-year-olds to DaniPine3, when ColonelKurtz decided to hold a fair trial, hearing both sides. Upon hearing both sides, Kurtz decided Turb0's description of the events wasn't detailed enough, at which point Fish threatened him. Hockey salmon was there too, for some reason. As with all court cases, it eventually came down to more angry five-year-old arguing. Aside from arguing, highlights include God making an appearance, confirming his secret gay relationship with Satan.
So. Uhh. Yeah. You probably know what a sitenotice is. Those things nobody looks at and dismisses as soon as they pop up. Well MrX had the bright idea to parody Wikipedia's 25 year anniversary. I made the editnotice, MrX made some tweaks, and long story short, my work is on every page of this website.[note 1]
Dani's revision of the original drawing. The horrors... nice tits on it though...
Fish's reply. Not to be confused with GlitchyZorua, the topic of the biopic, even though the damn wrapper puts it in the biopic section and i don't feel like adding more whitespace to this fucking thing to make it not in the biopic, even though this ridiculous rant is causing way more whitespace than should be allowed in an average UnSignpost issue
Demon spawning ground and local dumbassery[note 2] LPTEW has spawned yet another monstrosity, this time in the form of a moe personality of LPTEW itself. Fish on skates began the horrors, mentioning it in a completely unrelated thing, only for DaniPine3 to create an eldritch abomination beyond the wildest dreams of Satan himself.
These creations were met with mixed reactions, with GlitchyZorua calling for them to be killed with fire, ColonelKurtz having a stroke, Turb0-Sunrise forcing Fish to give hers red socks, and somebody masturbating. I heard it. It was in the broom closet.
If you see these creatures, seek medical attention immediately. You will likely die if exposed to these creatures for long periods of time. Do not taunt Happy Fun Ball.
The week is upon us. Forest Fire Week. BURN THE SHIT! BURN IT! MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhAHAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
Biopic
There's a place in France or somewhere. They say there's nude dancing. Sounds like fun. This has nothing to do with GlitchyZorua, who is honestly great. They don't do much actual writing, but they're around. Mostly on VFD, but if you hide in the dark corners of MrX's talk page, Zorua'll be there.
10:57, 7 February 2026 Alula blocked DaniPine3 with an expiration time of 7 minutes and 5 seconds (account creation disabled) (Felt like it)
11:02, 7 February 2026 DaniPine3 blocked Alula with an expiration time of 1 hour and 8 minutes (account creation disabled, cannot edit own talk page) (Payback >:[)
11:10, 7 February 2026 Alula unblocked Alula(it's not very effective...)
11:12, 7 February 2026 Alula blocked DaniPine3 with an expiration time of 3 seconds (account creation disabled) (DaniPi3)
14:08, 9 February 2026 Alula blocked 50.206.73.246 with an expiration time of 1 day (anonymous users only, account creation disabled) (pay attention in class you idiot)
If your talkpage doesn't have some weird CSS on it,*cough* MKyou may be noticing that the good[citation needed] ol' USP looks a bit different. We've revamped[note 3] some stuff in the back.
First off, if you look at the super fucking old issuses, you'll see a little thing next to the issue number. We brought that back. Then we split the heading thingy in half. It doesn't do much, but it looks nicer. Then we put the heading in a box. Looks so fucking nice. Now we put the WHOLE THING in a bo- excuse me...
oh, oh,OH!
Where were we?
Quote(s) of the Week
“usiong hHE POWER OF NTO CORERCTINT WORDS I WILL UNCYCLEOPEDIA A MAJROR STROEK AND THEN TO STOP THE STOPKE THEY WWKKWKKWWKWKWKWKWJWWJ”
– ColonelKurtz
“I'd rather be Spamton, because back then he had a giant TV sugar daddy.”
Holy shit. They actually did it. ColonelKurtz got banned by Alula for "repeated creation of garbage pages, spamming discussions with gibberish/irrelevant messages, generally just being a dick, etc." Following a brief change of the blocking time to 2 hours by DaniPine3, Turb0-Sunrise put that one template on his page, with Soviet moving the old contents to a new page. People started taking his subpages in a process known as "article-trenching".
Aside from that, one of his last acts was voting against on my article on VFH. Soo... you could say it's mixed reactions from ol' Turb0.
For whatever reason, newcomer OrdinaryJoe1234 has been nominated a ton of articles like ChatGPT and Rickrolling. Despite being warned by Shabidoo, he has still continued nominating articles. Because of this, he has earned the nickname "The 2011th Fenris" from Fish on skates just now.
After the purging of the AI articles helped by Gergdown's revolution thingy, people want to do something about AI images. However, everyone has a different opinion. MrX, OPOSSUM, and Noopnurf want to leave the AI images alone, but Gergdown, Turb0-Sunrise, DaniPine3, MK, and I would like to do something. After a lengthy off-topic conversation on the user talk page of recently banned ColonelKurtz, a forum was created with the title of The Noopstein Files.
15:22 Alula blocked ColonelKurtz with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) (ugh)
20:31, 13 February 2026 DaniPine3 changed block settings for ColonelKurtz with an expiration time of 2 hours (account creation disabled) (hold on, why infinite? the guy hasn't done anything really bad now)
20:33, 13 February 2026 Alula changed block settings for ColonelKurtz with an expiration time of infinite (account creation disabled) (dani don't bother, this is for his general behavior)
Because this only happens once in a whenever, we here at the USP would like to welcome Deemoxagoard aboard. Fuck. Shit. You STUPID DUMBASSARY USER! How do you not know the proper way to speak the English language, Turb0? As we all know, the correct way of spelling aboard is aboard!!! Obviously not agoard!!! In fact, since you said that, not only have you offended me, but the entire history of the Anglo-Saxon language chain, Turb0.
Anyways, welcome Deemox. There's cake here somewhere. Depending on if Bill ate it all. Fuck you, Bill.
) above the edit box. This will automatically produce your name and the date.
