!
The last [#1 SALESMAN 2021] to edit was ColonelKurtz!
Archibe 1 Archibe 2 Archibe 3 Archibe 4 Archibe 5 Archibe 6 Archibe 7 Archibe 8 Archibe 9 Archibe 10 Archibe 11 Archibe 12 Archibe 13 Archibe 14 Archibe 15 Archibe 16 Archibe 17 Archibe 18 Archibe 19 Archibe 20 Archibe 21 Archibe 22 Archibe 23 Archibe 24 Archibe 25 Archibe 26 Archibe 27 Archibe 28 Archibe 29 Archibe 30 Archibe 31 Archibe 32 Archibe 33 Archibe 34 Archibe 35 Archibe 36 Archibe 37 Archibe 38 Archibe 39 Archibe 40 Archibe 41 Archibe 42 Archibe 43 Archibe 44 Archibe 45 Archibe 46 Archibe 47 Archibe 48 Archibe 49 Archibe 50 Archibe 51 Archibe 52
it seems you're out of luck[edit source]
TRUCK! 16:38, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
archibe[edit source]
it's been too long since archibe ![]()
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16:38, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
hot damn[edit source]
olulas have existed since 2008 apparently ![]()
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16:58, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- apparently not


17:01, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
whyOh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 18:01, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- because --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 18:23, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- ๐ ฑ๏ธbecause why Oh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 18:24, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
Who's user page is going to be vandalised next?[edit source]
Alula has vandalised Turb0-Sunrise's user page and DaniPine3 has vandalised MK's so who do you think is next? Sovietโญ (Ask for free votes) 21:55, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- Kakun is gonna vandalize yours probably 21:56, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- i deserve recognition for my user page vandalizationings --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 21:58, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- @Alula: I was going to ask "that user is back?" but then I realized what the source code said... actually, maybe that user shouldn't still be in that template. hold on, let me do one thing real quick. ๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 21:59, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- can't wait to see the 2011th fenris --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 22:02, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- there isn't a Fenris2011 sadly, but there is a Fenris2010 from the year of 2010 22:14, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- can't wait to see the 2011th fenris --Dame Fish on skates
- @Alula: I was going to ask "that user is back?" but then I realized what the source code said... actually, maybe that user shouldn't still be in that template. hold on, let me do one thing real quick. ๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 21:59, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- i deserve recognition for my user page vandalizationings --Dame Fish on skates
- Yanno, it's been a long time since my page was vandalized... =) ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:39, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
THE SCORES ARE IN! (MITK RANKING)[edit source]
In 14th place...
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In 13th place...
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In 12th place...
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In 11th place...
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In 10th place...
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In 9th place...
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In 8th place...
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In 7th place...
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In 6th place...
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In 5th place...
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In 4th place...
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In 3rd place...
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In 2nd place...
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In 1st place...
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Well, that was it! It's unlikely that we're doing this again, since the game is practically finished, but there you go! The Make it to Ketchikan song rankings! Oh, and before you ask, OHIOIKALUITEARRAPE2 got a score of 6, and an average of 0.75. ๐ gergdown๐(talk) โ๏ธ 22:31, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- how the fuck did the worst song i make get 8th


22:36, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- well i thought it way better than your other ones. mostly because it sounds somewhat... cohesive? like, i can very clearly hear that it's the same song throughout the entire thing, which is not the case for your other ones at all 23:02, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- i will say funky armpits is kinda all over the place, but other than that


23:04, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- your songs introduce a new melody every 5-10 seconds and it makes them sound like garbage noise to me 23:10, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- @Turb0-Sunrise: may I ask why did you give that song the name "funky armpits"? ๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 23:12, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- so it would be a nice contrast to dirty water probably. idk i'm not bostonian so i have to guess 23:13, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- i have no fucking clue. i guess the main guitar line sounds kinda funky


23:14, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- @Turb0-Sunrise: but why armpits? ๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 11:29, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- i have no fucking clue. i guess the main guitar line sounds kinda funky
- so it would be a nice contrast to dirty water probably. idk i'm not bostonian so i have to guess 23:13, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- @Turb0-Sunrise: may I ask why did you give that song the name "funky armpits"? ๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 23:12, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- your songs introduce a new melody every 5-10 seconds and it makes them sound like garbage noise to me 23:10, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
- i will say funky armpits is kinda all over the place, but other than that
- well i thought it way better than your other ones. mostly because it sounds somewhat... cohesive? like, i can very clearly hear that it's the same song throughout the entire thing, which is not the case for your other ones at all 23:02, 5 February 2026 (UTC)
me spungardb[edit source]
me spungardb and me exist! me genius!Oh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things!
- timestamp


14:32, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- me spungardb and me not exist! me not genius!Oh, Fish, you can do stupid things! 15:34, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- spacestamp
DANI-PINE3
16:13, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- me spungardb, me return to say that skate fish no intelligent! Oh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 17:14, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- me skate fish, me return to say that i no intelligent! Oh, Fish, you can do stupid things! 00:27, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- me spungardb, dere is one spungardb and it me not piss of hatesOh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 13:26, 9 February 2026 (UTC)
- me skate fish, me return to say that i no intelligent! Oh, Fish, you can do stupid things! 00:27, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- me spungardb, me return to say that skate fish no intelligent! Oh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 17:14, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- spacestamp
- me spungardb and me not exist! me not genius!Oh, Fish, you can do stupid things! 15:34, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
Thoughts on pasting in Deltarune song lyrics in here?[edit source]
I've been listening to Penumbra Phantasm with lyrics so much lately and I cannot get off this damn leitmotif. Anyone mind if I pasted in some of its lyrics here? ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:16, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- last time i checked Penumbra Phantasm isn't a Deltarune song 16:17, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- @ARandomPage: go wild.
also Penumbra Phantasm is a Homestuck song not a Deltarune one๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 16:17, 6 February 2026 (UTC)- oh hi page


16:19, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- i mean we already do that with the driving in my car song so i'm with alula on this one --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 16:36, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- Holy stars, those are very fast responses. So fast I got edit conflicted while writing this. How did you do that? Do you just check this site that often? Anyways, yeah Penumbra is a Homestuck song oops. The versions with lyrics are all based on remixes, though. Those remixes are for Deltarune and not Homestuck. ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:37, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- i'm a LPTEW junkie --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 16:41, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- @ARandomPage: guess we're here rather often. also I can't deny I find the "Penumbra will be in Deltarune" theory off, considering that even if the song itself didn't get created, many songs from Homestuck were based on it. also Toby himself said he wouldn't be using any songs featuring "Doctor" (another Homestuck song) in the near future since the composer that made it is now dead, and Penumbra is one of those songs that feature Doctor on it.
also you edit conflicted me Page and Fish :[๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 16:41, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- @ARandomPage: guess we're here rather often. also I can't deny I find the "Penumbra will be in Deltarune" theory off, considering that even if the song itself didn't get created, many songs from Homestuck were based on it. also Toby himself said he wouldn't be using any songs featuring "Doctor" (another Homestuck song) in the near future since the composer that made it is now dead, and Penumbra is one of those songs that feature Doctor on it.
- i'm a LPTEW junkie --Dame Fish on skates
- Holy stars, those are very fast responses. So fast I got edit conflicted while writing this. How did you do that? Do you just check this site that often? Anyways, yeah Penumbra is a Homestuck song oops. The versions with lyrics are all based on remixes, though. Those remixes are for Deltarune and not Homestuck. ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:37, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- i mean we already do that with the driving in my car song so i'm with alula on this one --Dame Fish on skates
- oh hi page
- @ARandomPage: go wild.
Anyone got a way to make Uncyclopedia have dark mode?[edit source]
Like a CSS thing or something, I dunno, I'm not a tech support goddess like a certain other monthly month-long hiatus-goer. Some dark mode extensions I know (Miraheze for instance) also invert the images, which I don't want. ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:46, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- it's in preferences


16:46, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- Oh holy stars thanks. How long has that been in there? ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:49, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- @ARandomPage: it's been there at least for 5 years already. might be more.
so, are you going to copy down the lyrics, or....? ๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 16:51, 6 February 2026 (UTC)- 5 years??? Darn. Anyway. Hold on I need to ask Amethyst Deltarune first. ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:57, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- @ARandomPage: it's been there at least for 5 years already. might be more.
- Oh holy stars thanks. How long has that been in there? ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:49, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
11 MINUTES OF SONG LYRICS, GO! (Song lyrics by Amethyst Deltarune.)[edit source]
Darkness spirals, bending Scattered, lost for centuries Here at shadow's ending Shatter twilight reveries
In this heaven of yours You will fall unto me Face this final encore Fatal, true, and cruelly
Walk the path of Eden Freezing out in the cold Please accept your freedom As your โprophetsโ foretold
Heroes born to die Youโve heard the tale before On Calvary for our kind To take an Angelโs soul
No more time to waste Itโs as the Legend goesโฆ
Dust is stirring Thereโs a face behind you Donโt you see the way These darkened lands can blind you? When the light is low And when the shadows move The light inside your soul Shall split this world in two
Piercing roar of the heavens When youโre locked inside a fantasy Of a humanโs possession Left a remnant of your SOUL through a savior made for raising the seas
So the storyโs to end here Yet the heroes say theyโre in control When the future is unclear Have you forsaken the night or is the darkness set to swallow you whole?
Donโt forget the way it snows The Northernlights still claim to glow But fade away when facing down your soul
Too late, for fate is approaching A Revelation of prophecy I shall rid this world of blight โtil everything you see is light Sinking in a change of tide Cinders burn behind my eyes!
Too late to claim myself holy The trumpets blaze for my harmony Can she see or is she blind? The face of hatred, made divine The voices in your ears are mine Donโt forget the way you lied!
Through the branches of the thicket, lay a potterโs for the youth Tombs engraved with titles, placed for everyone but you A symbol of my light tied to a pantheon of three FALSE HEROES!
Piercing roar of the heavens From the throat of those who pull the strings Otherworldly reflections Look back through mirrors of glass Within a prophecy
Three heroes born to be defeated Chained upon a wooden cross Darkness drains away our meaning Weโve been given by the hand of god!
Hearing as it screams The silence of the cold The cold inside of you Thereโs a light inside your soul That rips your soul in two
Oooโฆ
When the darkness starts to move! When the world is split in two! And the things you thought you knew Seem like blasphemy!
This angel in the snow A reflection of their soul With the truth The promise that they broke When the world Is finally in my HOLD! They will kneel When I am in control
When darkness finally grew And angels finally hark When everything you knew Is doomed to tear apart! You bear the ugly truth The truth inside your heart Iโm with you in the dark
Dark boils from the depths Absorbed by the light! Donโt forget That neverending night
Covered up in frost, and rotting until it ends!
Come follow me into the dark With your heart As the ark Being rocked by the waves
Because Iโm with you in the dark With your heart As my mark Being locked in a cage
Come follow me into the dark With your heart As the ark Being rocked by the waves
Because Iโm with you in the dark With your heart As my mark Being locked in a cage
Stuck in the past
And yet the present shall last
For all the dark in your heart
Is ripped apart by your acts!
And yet the air is getting cold And the monsterโs getting close Can you hear me?
On that day When you had thrown me away Do you still hear of my scratching Inside the walls of your brain? And in the clearing Snow had settled down upon a lost grave
Angels play of your demise Through a trumpet laced with rosy gold I remember all your lies Where do you think that youโre going? No, the hopelessโ soul is staying with me!
Piercing roar of space and time Left relying on a last resort In the ending of this night Left a remnant of my SOUL and what remains to stay inside of that corpse
As the darkness breaks and bends My legs are standing once again Your choices didnโt matter in the end
Left my hand on the window None see the culprit reigning the light You know nothing that I know! None but a parasite to my life
Cold wind flows like a river Into a broken corpse of a ghost Do you know suffering like I know? Even if heaven beckons me go
Helpless in agony Finished in death Held us in apathy With every breath
Oh Finally free Though your mindโs Been deceived In my control You shall freeze Held as whole Through hopes and dreams And make believe
On that fated day when we were chained unto an endless winter In the piece of glass that has your actions in a list I saw the way it started, how itโs stopping, now I still remember How this game we play is made to shatter in the end
Everything you are Is just pretend!
HOW THIS GAME WE PLAY IS MADE TO SHATTER IN THE END!!
Roaring, wailing As a lullaby Upon a False God
Your heart is failing And the vesselโs crying As this God Rots
The Depths are parted By my broken voice But you could never see You never had a choice!
I am your only GOD! Gomorrah knows my fire! So the misbegotten see What happens to a LIAR!
There, in the glass Thatโs how this shall end Thereโs blood on my hands Yet my mindโs in denial
No matter your acts Or the love of your friends! Youโll kneel on the ground looking down with a smile
And when the darkness floods your dreams Youโll see the light of disbelief Everything you could ever be Ends at this point of history ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 16:59, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- Oh no the formatting is weird. oops. uhhhh i don't wanna fix this. at least it's not horribly long ARandomPage, also named Space (ARandomTalkPage) (ARandomContributionsPage) 17:00, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
I'm gonna tell you a story
I'm gonna tell you about my town
I'm gonna tell you a big fat story, baby
Aah, it's all about my town
Yeah, down by the river
Down by the banks of the river Charles
(Aah, that's what's happening, baby)
That's where you'll find me,
Along with lovers, muggers, and thieves
(Aah, but they're cool people)
Well I love that dirty water,
Oh, Boston you're my home
(Ooh, you're the number one place)
Frustrated women,
(I mean they're frustrated)
Have to be in by twelve o'clock
(oh, that's a shame)
But I'm a-wishin' and a-hopin'
(oh)
That just once those doors weren't locked
(I like to take time with my baby, walk around)
Well I love that dirty water,
Oh, Boston, you're my home
(Oh yeah)
*Kickass harmonica solo*
'Cause I love that dirty water,
Aaooh, Boston, you're my home
(Ooh yeah)
Well I love that dirty water,
(I love it, baby)
Love that dirty water,
(I love Boston)
Love that dirty water,
(Have ya heard about the strangler?)
Love that dirty water,
(I'm the man, I'm the man)
Love that dirty water,
(aaoh)
![]()
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17:01, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- i wanna write a LPTEW parody of dirty water --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 17:05, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- hell, i had a parody of uncyc in general in dirty water


17:06, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- @Fish on skates: I'm curious what the lyrics would be like. ๐๐๐DaniPine3 (talk)๐๐๐ 17:09, 6 February 2026 (UTC)
- hell, i had a parody of uncyc in general in dirty water
GERGDOWN G GERGDOWN
THAT'S MY FUCKING NAME
I AM FINAL BOSS
OF UNCYCLO GAME
THIS IS YOU'RE LAST ACT
THAT IS JUST A FACT
BECAUSE I WILL MAKE
YOU SHIT FUCKING [Smacked]
WHAT KIND OF [Music] DO YOU LIKE ?
SO PERHAPS [You'd Be Interested]
IN SOME [Lawrencium Doses]
BECAUSE I AM MOTHERFUCKING GERGDOWN
HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHA
SO PERHAPS [You'd Be Interested]
IN MY BIG [Big-Ass] SOJOURN
ALL THE WAY ACROSS THE VANCOUVER PLAINS
๐ gergdown๐(talk) โ๏ธ 01:35, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
remember[edit source]
no user wants to be a kurtzOh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 01:09, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
- every user wants to be a [BIG SHOT]Oh, Fish, you can do stupid things! 02:56, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
very stupid question v2[edit source]
i once again have to ask: does anyone know of somewhere that i can find decent sound effects of seals? i still can't find any 19:29, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
- ask a seal, obviously


19:32, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
- youtube --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 19:33, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
- did you look on the wikimedia commons? GlitchyZorua ๐ฉ๐ฆ (give floofy hug) 19:49, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
- yes, and instead of finding seal sound effects i found a category for sound effects from Work at a Pizza Place somehow 00:35, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- i found recordings of people saying "seal" --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 00:43, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- yeah that's the problem i keep running into. all the sound effects are either too low-quality, completely unrelated, someone just saying "seal" or too long for what i need them for 00:46, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- i found recordings of people saying "seal" --Dame Fish on skates
- yes, and instead of finding seal sound effects i found a category for sound effects from Work at a Pizza Place somehow 00:35, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- did you look on the wikimedia commons? GlitchyZorua ๐ฉ๐ฆ (give floofy hug) 19:49, 7 February 2026 (UTC)
- youtube --Dame Fish on skates
Superbowl in 3 hours and 30 minutes[edit source]
ARE YOU READY TO RUMBLE??? ๐ gergdown๐(talk) โ๏ธ 20:01, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- poll timesuper bowlPlease vote below. Results will be shown when you have voted.
You are not entitled to view results of this poll before you have voted.There were 7 votes since the poll was created on 21:10, 8 February 2026.poll-id E6A01A259FCE1EE39F5DCCD00DA58D4D - --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 21:10, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- why is it called superbowl when they're not bowling 21:13, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- the stadium is sorta shaped like a bowl i guess --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 21:15, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- and they're not drinking soup from it? 21:16, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- gatorade is close enough to soup


21:17, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- you're right it should be called gatoraderamericanfootball --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 21:18, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- who the fuck cares about some shitty consumerist tard propaganda? I thought the guy that looked like and waddled around the penguin was pretty good though.Oh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 13:18, 9 February 2026 (UTC)
- every year the commercials get more and more retarded TURB0-SUNRISE DE LA RED SOX 13:26, 9 February 2026 (UTC)
- one of the ads was for a dumb service called AWS which was ran by the Amazon company. it was literally "AWS is how AI uses high powered performance for illiterate troglodytes who can't read". sometimes I wish I was illiterate so I couldn't read that stuff. the commercials get shittier.Oh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 13:36, 9 February 2026 (UTC)
- every year the commercials get more and more retarded TURB0-SUNRISE DE LA RED SOX 13:26, 9 February 2026 (UTC)
- who the fuck cares about some shitty consumerist tard propaganda? I thought the guy that looked like and waddled around the penguin was pretty good though.Oh, Kurtz, you can do stupid things! 13:18, 9 February 2026 (UTC)
- you're right it should be called gatoraderamericanfootball --Dame Fish on skates
- gatorade is close enough to soup
- and they're not drinking soup from it? 21:16, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- the stadium is sorta shaped like a bowl i guess --Dame Fish on skates
- why is it called superbowl when they're not bowling 21:13, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
Template question[edit source]
Is there a template that does something with dark mode I could have sworn I saw somthing like that. Sovietโญ (Ask for free votes) 23:32, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- template:dark perhaps. --Dame Fish on skates
CUN 23:41, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- or template:dark mode 23:49, 8 February 2026 (UTC)
- Thanks, it was Template:Dark mode Sovietโญ (Ask for free votes) 00:28, 9 February 2026 (UTC)
