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the boredom is killing me

kinda ran out of things to do. can you give me a really tedious task to do around here? I tried playing the actual zork, but that fucking thief kept on stealing my shit and stabbing me, and I got soft locked at the entrance to hades. please give me something to do. Deemox (talk) 16:35, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

do the yakutat road minigame in MITK without hitting a single tree 16:46, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

I meant something usefulDeemox (talk) 16:55, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

@Deemox: categorize stuff on Special:UncategorizedPages, I suppose --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 16:59, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

ok I will do that.Deemox (talk) 17:17, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

how do I categorize things Deemox (talk) 17:19, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

I give up I'm going back to getting stabbed a whole bunchDeemox (talk) 17:19, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

@Deemox: go to "edit source" and put [[Category:The name of the category]] --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 17:21, 3 March 2026 (UTC)

ok how the heck do I categorize this https://en.uncyclopedia.co/wiki/UnGames:The_Helen_Keller_Experience/Game the buttons are all gone. and wouldn't the category thing break it? and what do I do with the CSS code article things? Am I even supposed to categorize those? Deemox (talk) 14:20, 4 March 2026 (UTC)

@Deemox: Special:EditPage/UnGames:The Helen Keller Experience/Game 🍂 gergdown🍂(talk) 🌑 14:30, 4 March 2026 (UTC)

ok thank you. – Preceding unsigned comment added by Deemox (talk • contribs)

Eastside Cannery (a hotel in las vegas) died, put it in the recent deaths list

aye aye aye i've heard that the Eastside Cannery was brutally killed by an implosion (it was today, March 5th 2026, event took place on 2:00 am) -Elliot on March 5th, 2026 at 02:37 AM PT

? 13:16, 5 March 2026 (UTC)

ay I wrote a shit article

So I have just finished my latest work, Doug: A DougDoug Story. it is a real book. and uh, as you can see, it's kind an AAAAA clone. It does make sense if you read the book. Deemox (talk) 16:04, 9 March 2026 (UTC)

Sure? I'm not gonna read an entire book just to find that out though, and realistically most people won't do that either 16:18, 9 March 2026 (UTC)

trust me you're missing out. you can buy a copy at dougdoug.com/book Deemox (talk) 16:19, 9 March 2026 (UTC)

@Deemox: (edit conflict) I think it'd be better as an UnBook, and if it started out as a normal story before becoming "Doug Doug Doug Doug Doug" --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 16:20, 9 March 2026 (UTC)

well it is a real book. that you can buy. Deemox (talk) 16:20, 9 March 2026 (UTC)

finally an excuse to write the word Doug over and over --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 16:22, 9 March 2026 (UTC)

behold. I do own a copy of this. fifteen bucks well spent.

should I rewrite an article?

the article for Hollow Knight: Silksong has been outdated for a while now and I feel like it should be rewritten now that the game is out? I have in fact played the game, I got to 98.8% completion. deemox 14:20, 11 March 2026 (UTC)

Oh noes! You were blocked!

You have been blocked from editing for a period of for . If you think there are good reasons for being unblocked, please write them down on a pineapple and shove it right up your ass. Once the block has expired, you are welcome to make useful contributions, but it is highly recommended that you stop . Thaaanks! ----Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 00:23, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

hey this actually isn't too bad, i still get to drive this thing 00:24, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

i see you've run over DeerniPine3 already --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 00:27, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

that is true. alula run over my precious body. now I am dead. I am writing this from the afterlife. I hope you are happy, Alula. 🎄🎄🎄DaniPine3 (talk)🎄🎄🎄 00:29, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

afdeerlife --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 00:30, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

say hi to dess aka rory nite from me 00:32, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

sorry but papyrus aka rory nite aka dess isn't here at the moment. they must be busy thrashing some fun gang ass. 🎄🎄🎄DaniPine3 (talk)🎄🎄🎄 00:47, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

this is why i don't play these games Sir Turb0-Sunrise de la Boston 01:13, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

--Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 01:36, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

Oh Deer!

You have called Squaw Dee by the forbidden Name.
The Evil Game Warden is Upon you.

--ー Preceding signed comment added by Squaw Dee (owns uncyclopedia • talk • contribs)  16:46, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

16:52, 16 March 2026 (UTC)

removed ICU?

so I added an ICU tag to Transformers: Dark Of The Moon a little bit ago and he just removed it? he did add onto the article but I feel like you're not supposed to just remove it? is that allowed? I put it back but I don't know. deemox 13:43, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

@Deemox: according to Uncyclopedia:Intensive Care Unit, users are actually allowed to remove the ICU tag themselves, although only if they've added a substantial amount of content and have complied with HTBFANJS. so I guess it depends if what that user wrote is funny and not just random nonsense/only a few lines. 🎄🎄🎄DaniPine3 (talk)🎄🎄🎄 13:56, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

@lazibum3: alright, I did remove it, I wasn't sure if that was something you can do and I did apologize to the author. thanks, '|'/2[-[- |3[]`/. deemox 14:14, 19 March 2026 (UTC)

We need to talk.

Today, Open The Correct Door (my game’s sequel), its ICU is past its expiration date, but it somehow hasn’t been deleted. Why? -- watchOS 7 @OfficialWatchOS7 10:55, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

It's probably because no one has gone through the ICU maintenance list yet (the page that keeps track of expired ICUs). 11:07, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

Ok, i've looked at this a bit more now, and i can confidently say that the ICU hasn't expired yet. It will expire sometime today though. 13:51, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

damn it

Did the VFD go over the limit? Damn it. I'm sorry. GlitchyZorua 🎩🦊 (give floofy hug) 22:30, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

Don't apologize. People mess up (and besides, this isn't that big of a deal to begin with). 22:41, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

ehhh alright then. GlitchyZorua 🎩🦊 (give floofy hug) 22:55, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

wowza, another promotion?

man, i dont even know what an autopatroller is and the description doesn't really make sense to me but i guess it means im a cop now or something? idk. thanks though. deemox 22:57, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

No, it means your edits are now automatically patrolled. Basically, nothing has changed for you. 23:09, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

no im pretty sure it means im a cop now you're under arrest for disrespecting me deemox 23:37, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

also i feel liek i haven't really done a whole lot in the few weeks besides flirting with Squaw_Dee. deemox 23:46, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

@Deemox: Pinging people is done with {{u}} or {{ping}}, like so Squaw Dee --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 23:51, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

i wasn't trying to ping him. deemox 23:58, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

but yes i did that wrong mb deemox 23:58, 20 March 2026 (UTC)

and if you want to link to someone's userpage without pinging them, there's Template:No ping --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 00:05, 21 March 2026 (UTC)

Why was I pinged? ー Preceding signed comment added by Squaw Dee (owns uncyclopedia • talk • contribs)  17:20, 21 March 2026 (UTC)

@Squaw Dee: you fool, you felt directly into my trap! go go gadget deer roadkiller!

🎄🎄🎄DaniPine3 (talk)🎄🎄🎄 17:23, 21 March 2026 (UTC)

ー Preceding signed comment added by Squaw Dee (owns uncyclopedia • talk • contribs)  17:28, 21 March 2026 (UTC)

Bug

I just made a game in my sandbox, and when I was making it, there were issues because the choices and the main page were at the same page (the game uses the text adventure templates just like Finland adventure and Garlic bread). I want it to be fixed. -- watchOS 7 @OfficialWatchOS7 16:16, 21 March 2026 (UTC)

@OfficialWatchOS7: Fixed it, you forgot a {{#switch:{{Get}} tag at the beginning 🍂 gergdown🍂(talk) 🌑 17:04, 21 March 2026 (UTC)

annoying ass IP is back

IP: 138.44.15.61 is deleting large chunks of Butter v. toast again and again for no reason... (i feel like a classroom narc, but damn) MK^yap!_{Fðllðw Ðåmågê †råïl} 04:31, 23 March 2026 (UTC)

 Done. (please ignore the fact that i replied two days after i did it) 09:32, 25 March 2026 (UTC)

There's a mysterious dark-gray bar on your userpage

I'm not sure whether or not it's supposed to be there so I decided to let you know --Gamma Here, friend, have some meth. 17:59, 25 March 2026 (UTC)

...where exactly is this gray bar? I don't see it. 18:01, 25 March 2026 (UTC)

this --Gamma Here, friend, have some meth. 18:03, 25 March 2026 (UTC)

@gammakid999: what --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 18:05, 25 March 2026 (UTC)

Yeah no that's not there for me. 18:06, 25 March 2026 (UTC)

idk my computers probably schizophrenic or something --Gamma Here, friend, have some meth. 18:07, 25 March 2026 (UTC)

J I M B O W H A L E D A G A I N

MEGA SMASHA!

You've been squished by a jimbo whale!
Please take this very seriously: OfficialWatchOS7 wants to let you know that you did something jimbo silly, which may or may not include creating Wikipedia oops sorry, wrong person. Your reasoning for being smashed by a whale is: HOW MANY FRICKING TIMES HAVE YOU BLOCKED SPAMBOT IP ADDRESSES??!!!.

Many many times. Also why exactly did i deserve to be whaled over this? 14:04, 27 March 2026 (UTC)

I was reading the Special:BlockList page (I wanted to view someone’s block log instead), but I saw that most of the blocks were made by you, to spambot IP addresses. It was too much so I whaled you lol -- watchOS 7 @OfficialWatchOS7 14:11, 27 March 2026 (UTC)

why would it be too much if it's her job to do so? Gamma Here, friend, have some meth. 14:14, 27 March 2026 (UTC)

1. I know it’s her duty.
2. It was a lot of spambots that were being blocked but for some reason I decided to whale Alula just because the block list had a lot of spambots in it -- watchOS 7 @OfficialWatchOS7 14:20, 27 March 2026 (UTC)

Also, do not block me if misuse of the whale template is a miscellaneous cause of blocking. -- watchOS 7 @OfficialWatchOS7 14:21, 27 March 2026 (UTC)

@OfficialWatchOS7: so far no Uncyclopedian has been blocked for overuse of the whale template. then again, so far no Uncyclopedian is known to have overused the whale template... 🎄🎄🎄DaniPine3 (talk)🎄🎄🎄 14:38, 27 March 2026 (UTC)

there is an {{whalemeat}} template --Dame Fish on skates DUN VFH UotM 15:35, 27 March 2026 (UTC)

Heh.... You could call me.... a comedian...

Niko....? Do they have...? One Shot..? Purplexed INSULT ME!!! 16:07, 31 March 2026 (UTC)

Yes, that was the point of the original game. 16:38, 31 March 2026 (UTC)

AY CARAMBA! YOU GOT FUCKING WHALED!

MEGA SMASHA!

You've been squished by a jimbo whale!
Please take this very seriously: OfficialWatchOS7 wants to let you know that you did something jimbo silly, which may or may not include creating Wikipedia oops sorry, wrong person. Your reasoning for being smashed by a whale is: making a fake error on the main page like how Cassie deleted it.

Have you, by any chance, heard of which day it is today? 09:56, 1 April 2026 (UTC)

Yes, I know what April Fools’ Day is. But I like the Wingdings one better because it’s more accessible than the error; the Main Page is really important for an online encyclopedia! -- watchOS 7 @OfficialWatchOS7 10:17, 1 April 2026 (UTC)

The Main Page is available all of the other days of the year (usually). People could live perfectly fine without it for one day. 16:31, 1 April 2026 (UTC)

Yes, but that fake error is a bit too bad. -- watchOS 7 @OfficialWatchOS7 09:49, 5 April 2026 (UTC)

Ok. Your loss, i suppose. 10:10, 5 April 2026 (UTC)

You are now source for entertainment

You're in my latest UnNews article Purplexed INSULT ME!!! 12:48, 1 April 2026 (UTC)

Uhm... ok? 16:34, 1 April 2026 (UTC)

!!!!

he's baaaaack! TURB0-SUNRISE DE LA RED SOX 01:42, 4 April 2026 (UTC)

Banned them. — L10nM4st3r ^{ROAR at me!} / _{What my paws scratched} 09:01, 4 April 2026 (UTC)

@L10nM4st3r: This is like, the only reason we hired you. TURB0-SUNRISE DE LA RED SOX 13:12, 4 April 2026 (UTC)