User:Noopnurf
Noopnurf People's Republic of Nooplenurf République des Nœuf | |||||
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Motto: "We Plow The Fields And Scatter" | |||||
Anthem: "Why Is My Car In Brazil" | |||||
Capital | Cross between Berlin and London | ||||
Previous capital | Croydon | ||||
Largest city | Horse Meat Quarter, Section 4 | ||||
Demonym | Nooples | ||||
Government | Democratic Dictatorship | ||||
‑ Supreme Leader | Lord Chewy Rubbins | ||||
‑ Ambassador | Seven of Nine | ||||
National Hero(es) | Boris Johnson, Hitler, Gareth Gates | ||||
Established | 1860 (Honda Accords) | ||||
Currency | Chocolate Coins & Hope | ||||
Religion | Aggressive Spaghettism | ||||
Population | At least 2 | ||||
Population density | Lots | ||||
Ethnic groups | Roman Numerals, Arabic Numerals, also the number 5 which is a special guest | ||||
Major exports | Beautiful women | ||||
Major imports | Meat, Cows, Beef, Cheese | ||||
Favourite pastime | National 'Fire Tranquiliser Darts At Unsuspecting Road Users' Day | ||||
Hours of operation | 9:30am - 2pm (siesta) 5pm - 9:30am | ||||
Internet TLD | .cow | ||||
Drives on | Ceiling |
“No, it doesn't mean nine nipples.”
“OH YES IT DOES”
Noopnurf is an extraordinarily beautiful town made entirely of reconstituted German sausage and shaped like the number 9.
Its origins are elusive, mysterious, and eternally edible.
No-one quite knows where it is.
Discovery[edit | edit source]
Noopnurf was discovered on April 19, 1869 in Yorkshire, England, alongside a single piece of bread. Upon closer inspection, it was found to contain life.
Experts examining the surface using highly refined sonic microscopes discovered a team of villagers trying to hike a mountain of fat, a small town with 3,482 inhabitants, and Barry Manilow singing a ballad to a group of bemused sheep in a field. Shocked, they left to get an even more powerful microscope, but when they returned they found the giant slab of 9-shaped mince (which they had named Noopnurf for unknown reasons) had vanished.
Unbeknownst to them, it had been carried away by gale force winds that both emerged and dissipated in the space of 3 seconds as soon as they left.
Thanks to the winds, all that was left in its place was a crater, as well as a battered road sign that read:
YIELYsss
Noopnurf was never seen again.
Obscurity[edit | edit source]
Documents pertaining to this event were only recently discovered, having been lost for more than 140 years.
[edit | edit source]
Viennese Whirls are tasty.