User:OPOSSUM/Opossumopedia
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OPOSSUM is the divine spirit-lord of all things. [1]You’d better drop on the ground like you’re dead now (like a possum!) NOW!!! Or in a short time thou shalt perish! You are nothing but my slave now!! Do as I say, dipshit!! BWAHAHAHA!!
See also:
Did you know?
★that there is a bomb on the school bus? Hehehe! Don't tell anyone!!!
★that in his previous life, OPOSSUM told a joke in death row? Everyone would have laughed had it not been for the horrible execution.
★that it's better to be a coward than a cow or an ard?
★that OPOSSUM was a preemie? That explains everything.
★that in his previous life, OPOSSUM told a joke in death row? Everyone would have laughed had it not been for the horrible execution.
★that it's better to be a coward than a cow or an ard?
★that OPOSSUM was a preemie? That explains everything.
News [etc]
OPOSSUM uses his fingers to pull shit out of his asshole in Whittier, Alaska
- OPOSSUM returns to Ventura… and possibly Uncyclopedia?"
- Pasmorade can't make a good news article (jk)
- Only OPOSSUM can
- actually OPOSSUM can’t either
- ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
- Uncyclopedia is dead
On this day
January 20: Act Like You Care About Politics Day
- 1265 - The first ever House of Parliament is convened, first item on agenda is, "Do the peasants have too much rights?"
- 1783 - Britain formally splits from the American Colonies after the Revolutionary War: Britain says, "you'll be back."
- 1789 - George Washington makes speech declaring himself eternal Godking of the 13 colonies, is brought back to his senses with a stiff drink and a good nap.
- 1953 - Senator Alfred "The Lorax" Ramsey introduces bill to Senate to save the endangered Truffula forest from the Onceler.
- 2017 - Donald Trump is inaugurated as the 45th President of the United States, satire dies a slow and painful death.
- 2021 - Donald Trump is expelled as Joe Biden makes his return as the 46th President, promising to reinstate the legality of satire but subsequently failing.
- 2025 - Robot Hitler is inaugurated as the 47th President, liberals immediately call for a hundred stern op-eds.
- 2065 - Barron Trump's floating brain becomes President, Americans wish for the simpler days of Mecha Hitler.
Picture for today
manaqi iliʔi kʰapa OPOSSUMOPEDIA
- How to be funny and not just stupid – for help with that comedy thing
- Policies and guidelines – for the boring rules no one follows
- Formatting – for help on editing
- Requested articles – for inspiration, or lack thereof
- Village Dump – to throw angry invectives at other users
- Community portal – for general community shenanigans
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- ↑ Recent findings have shown that Opossum is not the prime deity of Chowgism; he is merely a preacher. The real god of all moccasins and New World marsupials is CHOWG.