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From today's featured article

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Regifting (vilis incogitatus donum) is the act of taking a useless or thoughtless gift which you've received and presenting it to somebody else under the pretext of it being a recently purchased item that was specifically chosen for the recipient. Despite this simple definition, regifting is a fairly complex human ritual of etiquette which features a variety of social cues and hidden meanings. This cycle of human interaction paradoxically begins and ends with the same act, the presenting of a tacky gift - most likely intended as an acknowledgment of a birthday or traditional holiday. The emotional dichotomy created by the gift giver's "happy holiday/birthday" sentiment and the gift receiver's social obligation to say "thank you" results in a form of power exchange. Etiquette dictates that the person handing you this crappy gift is entitled to the same respect you'd normally give to any other warm-blooded bipedal creature who brings forth offerings of toys and treasure. The unfortunate reality is that someone has unloaded worthless merchandise on you and got thanked for it while you're left with a burning question that stabs deeply into your soul....Why? (Full article...)

Did you know...

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  • ... that the toaster in Pulp Fiction is wanted in connection with at least 5 unsolved murders? (Pictured)
  • ... that if I had to describe myself in three words, I would say "not very good at maths"?
  • ... that Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination A, the sister drug to Stupendous Tropical Meningitis Vaccination B, is very effective against Stupendous Tropical Meningitis?
  • ... that a bomb shelter is the safest place to hide explosives?
  • ... that a Pie Chart is the most delicious way of visually conveying information?
  • ... that the brainrot is taking oveBRR BRR PATAPIM, IL MIO CAPPELO E PIENO DI SLIM! TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG TUNG SAHUR! BOMBARDINO CROCODILO!
  • ... that Afghanistan is known for its lush dirt farms, where dirt and dust are cultivated by villagers to enhance the scenic emptiness for which the region is known?
  • ... that Stan Lee originally conceived the X-Men as a group of post-op transgenders?

In the news

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Take that, Betty White!

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Stranger Things 5 volume 2 and Spaceballs 2 • The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince • Rich New Yorkers fleeing Mamdanistan • Larry Sanger's war on Wikipedia • The New England Patriots barely beating crappy opponents • Mike Tomlin screwing the Pittsburgh Steelers • Giants fans hiding in a corner • Non-Bears invading Tennessee

Recent deaths: YouTube player's old design • Donna Godchaux • Diane Ladd • Dick Cheney • U.S. Government shutdown (finally!) • Tatsuya Nakadai • Sally Kirkland • The penny • Udo Kier • Jimmy Cliff • Warner Bros. • Sheen Estevez • Chet Ubetcha • Doug Dimmadome • Zed's dead, baby (He was also the bad guy in The Mask) • Animal Farm

Upcoming deaths: Eurovision Song Contest • DEI • Iran's nuclear program • Diddy's bank account • MSNBC • Donald Trump • NYC's economy • Chiefs Kingdom's and Ravens Flock's livers and kidneys after falling to 6-7 • Weed • 67% of people trying to understand why 6 of 7 news stories mention "6-7" • The MetroCard • Dick van Dyke, eventually

On this day

This is so cliché

December 14: World Cliché Day

  • Long Long Ago - Some French guy misplaced his patent for creating the English language.
  • 1735 - Pie was discovered
  • 1911 - Welsh explorer Roald Dahl and his team become the first people to reach the Giant Peach.
  • 1929 - Hitler realizes he has very little time to finish his Christmas shopping, and subsequently freaks out while in line at Wal-Mart. Chaos ensues.
  • 1991 - Scientists first start working on Packaged Bread Without Crust™. For the next 10 years they will go to countless parties with other scientists and feel like they are working to find the cure for cancer.
  • 1992 - It was discovered that Bart Simpson ate my shorts.
  • 2000 - George W. Bush receives his first gay blowjob. In return for the favor, George W. Bush and his government maintain a very friendly line towards homosexuals.
  • 2001 - 10 years in the making, Packaged Bread Without Crust™ is finally introduced as a prototype to the Bimbo company.
  • 2004 The Kitten army begins to prepare for their mass masturbation strike for 25 December during the Human vs. Kitten War. Strike kills 250,000+ humans.
  • 2004 Post it notes claimed another victim in Paris. Rioting ensues. The PostIt-note war began.
  • Today - The first day of the rest of your life.
  • Tomorrow - Another day.
  • The Day After Tomorrow - It's the End of the World as We Know It (And I Feel Fine)
  • 2101 War was beginning...

Picture of the day

ASBOWAAT: Garfielf Edition
 Jo(h)n is far from able to grasp the grim reality.

Image credit: OPOSSUM, Alula, DaniPine3, L10nM4st3r, as well as YouTube’s PilotRedSun, whose video inspired this image.
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