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From today's featured article [Feature an article]

Carnies are a nomadic people that originated on the steppes of Central Asia. Long known to the West for their seemingly strange customs and frequent wars with Muscovy’s infant Czarist kingdoms (and, later, the Russian Empire), Carnies have been instrumental in both the shaping of world history and the advancement of games based upon throwing balls into or at something from three to six feet away.

Archeological evidence suggests that Carnies originated on the steppes of Central Asia. Like most nomadic peoples, Carnie society depended heavily upon a tribal- or clan-based system. In the case of Carnies, a clan was known as a Carnival, and a group of many Carnivals in one place was known as a County Fair. (Full article...)

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Did you know... [edit]

... that the Southern United States is well-known for its "Southern Hospitality"? (Pictured)

... that every single day, we breathe enough air to continue living?
... that the sport of Water Polo can be greatly improved with the addition of sharks?
... that it takes a great amount of sexual commitment to get a computer turned on, but once your computer is properly aroused, it can offer you some of the greatest sexual thrills you may ever experience?
... that since haste makes waste, and slow and steady wins the race, it follows that everybody who loses a race must therefore be charged with littering?
... that St. Peter's Basilica is a large reptilian creature with breath of fire and a gaze that can turn people into stone?
... that Uranus is a gas giant?
... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores?

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In the news [edit]

"He ah-no give me ah-good coverage!"

Google reveals least popular searches of 2024
Jay-Z and Beyonce sit their children down and have a talk with them
Luigi cosplays as Robin Hood and guns down health insurance CEO; (Pictured) Americans rejoice
South Korea's president tries to order pizza, declares martial law instead
Biden pardons Princess Peach and Blossom
- ... and Hunter... and Fauci...
- Special Counsel Jack Smith pardons President-elect turkey, meaning he gets away with January 6th
Cicely Tyson demolishes Aaron Paul in Netflix "boxing" match
Project 2025 to be implemented in 2026, riots ensue
The Onion buys InfoWars. Extra true conspiracy theories coming soon!
- "Nope!" says, judge
Epstein pal Trump picks sex pest pedophile as attorney general... only for him to pull out
Trump picks Led Zeppelin to lead EPA
Obama smears poop on daycare
Kardashian and Aniston endorse bestiality
UnNews publishes official 2024 post-election guide for liberals having to deal with Trump
Joe Biden named winner of 2024 election, confusion erupts in America
2024 U.S. election cancelled due to absence of electoral votes, anarchy likely to follow
TikToker Peanut the Squirrel swatted, killed for "illegal guns and drugs"

Ongoing: Eurovision Song Contest • Russian Invasion • Israel-Hamas conflict • United States presidential election aftermath • NBA and NHL seasons • Athletes doing the "Trump Dance" • Bill Belichick going insane
Recent deaths: Brian Thompson (United Healthcare CEO) • Democrat party • Diddy's career • The Eras Tour • Alabama football's championship bid • The white guy from The Mod Squad
Upcoming deaths: Vladimir Putin • Bashar al-Assad • Diddy's freedom • Benjamin Netanyahu • Jay-Z's career and freedom • Kate Middleton • Aaron Rodgers' career

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On this day [edit]

December 15: International Day of Björk (Iceland)

1939 - Classic movie Gone With the Wind first premieres as a travelling flipbook exhibition.
1945 - General Douglas MacArthur orders the Japanese to stop using those weird toilets with the tubes that spray water up your butt.
1978 - After the United States recognizes the People's Republic of China as the real China, Taiwan sinks into the sea.
1981 - The first suicide bombing is carried out in Beirut, Lebanon, declared a revolution in the terroristic arts.
1996 - Weirdo sends Björk (Pictured) a letter bomb after his copy of Homogenic is lost in the mail.
1970 - Soviet space probe lands on Venus, is declared the new "red planet."
1973 - The American Psychiatric Association adds "likes the taste of creamed corn" to list of debilitating mental illnesses.
2011 - Morphle is created by a man from The Slenderlands

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