Åland

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia
Jump to navigation Jump to search
Ålandiskurarus
Free Democratic Russian Republic of Åland
Åland
Flag of Åland.svg.png Sayrussia.png
Flag Coat of Arms
Aland.png
povince map over Åland
CapitalMariehamn
Largest cityMarihamn
DemonymÅlander
Official language(s)Russian
GovernmentFree Russian democratic
‑ Most free and fair leader of ÅlandComrad Vutin
GDP100 trillion
National Hero(es)Comrad Nikostatov, Comrad Vutin
Declaration
 of Independence
1917
CurrencyÅland ruble
Population20.000
Time Zonewhat ever it is in Mocow
Ethnic groups
  • 96.8% Russian
  • 2.2% Swedish
  • 0.8% Finnish
  • 0.2% Ålanders
Internet TLD.RU

The Åland islands, or simply Åland, are an island group in the Baltic Sea. The islands are DEFINITELY not a part of Swedenland or Finland. The islands are actually a part of Яussia. Some people fall for the Swedish and/or Finnish propaganda that the islands belonge to them. This propaganda is widely belived by the world, even the UN thinks that the islands belong to the Finland.

History[edit | edit source]

Swedish Colony (dunno-1809)[edit | edit source]

When the Swedish vikings sailed around they found Åland. They then founded a city called Marihamn. This city would grow to the size of town with 1.000 people. The people lived mostly of stealing things and money from germany until the 1600-hundreds. Then they began farming. This went on for about a month. Then they gave up and went back to stealing money from germany.

Swedish-Яussian war (1809-1810)[edit | edit source]

When the Яussians wanted to take Finland for them self. The Sweds did not like this and declard war on the Яussians on the 4 of April 1809. The Яussians had quick advances in Finland and on the 20 of december had a navel invasion of Åland. This began the battel of Fasta Åland. This was a narrow victory by the Яussians. On May the 13 the war ended with Sweden ceeding Finland and Åland to the Яussians.

Яussian Colony (1811-1917)[edit | edit source]

After the war Åland got a new overpower. The only notable change was that they were no longer allowed to raid the germans. The Яussian started work on a new fortress called Bomarsund in 1820. The fortress was finished in 1825. The fortress had a garrison of 100 soldiers. In 1836 the Ålanders got unhappy and started a revolution against the Яussians. The Яussians had a easy victory over the Ålanders. They even forced everybody on the island to stop stealing from Germany. This ment they had to start farming for a living. This made the Ålanders even unhappier, but the secret police stopped all unrest on the island. This went on until 1879. Then the Яussians did let them do other things then farming. In 1908 the island established a shipbuilding industry. This went on to be one of the biggest in Яussia.

Яussian revolution (1917-1923)[edit | edit source]

In the Яussian revolution Åland sided with the red army, having a big part of the population living in Marihamn. The fortress of Bormarsund was stormed and taken over by the reds. Now being taken over by the communists they established the Åland SSR lead by Comrad Nikostatov.

Soviet Union (1923-1991)[edit | edit source]

Nikostatov expanded the shipbulding industry. Now about half the population worked in it. Nikostatov ruled the country until his death in 1935. Then Comrad Stalyavigra took over the country. He did not do so much until the 2. world war. The germans wanted revenge for thet they had raided germany and had multiple navel landings on the islands. All of them failed. After the 2. world war the economy growed. The gdp being 10 million us dollars. When the soviet union collapsed in 1991, Åland decided to join with russia.

Culture[edit | edit source]

The culture of Åland is mainly Russian. But there are bits of Swedish culture in there. For example they eat a lot of meatballs. Russian meatballs. Not Swedish.

Economy[edit | edit source]

The economy of Åland is mostly just Shipbulding. There have been efforts to expand the economy, but they mostly have failed. They get all their food from Russia.

Politics[edit | edit source]

The 2023 election Blue- Communists Red-Vutin

The politics of åland are very free and fair. Vutin won 99.9%(100 thousend votes) of the FREE vote. There are one other party on Åland. It is called the Communist Party(16 thousend votes). They got 0.01% of the vote

See also[edit | edit source]

  • Finland, a country which the UN thinks own Åland.
  • Sweden, a country which did own Åland
  • Russia, The true owner of Åland