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40,916 articlesay inay Englishay
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I was sitting in my living room very late at night, watching the Friday the 13th franchise. Something felt off, though. I don't mean in the way some horror movies might make you uneasy; something felt really, really wrong. That's when I heard it.
KI KI KI MA MA MA
I immediately got up and looked out the window. That's when I saw the bastard.
Jason Voorhees. Standing underneath a streetlight. No weapon. No credit card. No signup. No bullshit. He's not here to kill me; he's here to lay a goddamn beatdown, no two ways about it. I'll be damned if I let that happen. Me and him were staring at each other for about ten seconds before he started walking towards my house. Time to face the music. (Full article...)
Featured today, a long long time ago
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Idday ouyay owknay...
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- ... that the entire world rightfully belongs to Albania?
- ... that Deus ex machina is Latin for "cop out"?
- ... that if you laid out all of the nerves in your body end-to-end, you'd die?
- ... that the sky is up and the ground is down, except in Australia where the opposite is true?
- ... that creating an account comes with a 50% higher chance of leaving of Uncycloland alive?
- ... that back in my day, we didn't have no fancy Did you know sections on our wikis? We had to get all of our factoids from the library, like decent folk! And after we walked there barefoot across three counties 'cause bicycles hadn't been invented yet, we had to teach ourselves how to read the books - none of that fancy free-contents education you kids're all on about...
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In the news
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Onay isthay ayday...
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October 31: International Dress Like an Idiot Day
- 1517 - The Protestant Reformation begins. After spending all week on his robot costume, Martin Luther goes to the local church but they won't give him candy. He plays a trick on them spreading his theses all over the church door.
- 1897 - The City of London's Best Halloween Costume prize is awarded to Oscar Wilde for his clever Oscar Wilde costume.
- 1969 - Women discover that instead of putting time into making an awesome costume they can just take a normal job uniform and slut it up a bit.
- 1970 - Richard Nixon puts poison and razor blades in children's candy.
- 2025 - The end is marked by children knocking on your door and asking for treats.
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Oday'stay eaturedfay icturepay
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Iterwray anday Oobnay ofay ethay Onthmay
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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!
So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.
Let us all clap for him because I said so.
Oh my god! There are no more days left! It's today or miss the boat to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!
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| This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,916 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Igpay Atinlay!:
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