1996
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This page is a member of the Uncyclopedia Timeline. If an event isn't listed in the timeline, it most likely happened.
Represented here are the time periods from January to December 1996.
January
- January 1 - 1996 has murdered 1995.
- January 1 - Alan Greenspan started to make deals with the US economy.
February
- February 15 - Assisted suicide is legal in 48 out of 50 states, except Alaska and Wyoming.
March
Cancelled out,due to 1996 was an unusual leap year.
April
- April 1 - Booker T. Washington is born.
- April 4 - The Unabomber is arrested for crimes against tasteful nomenclature.
May
- May 21 - Hertziaustrovakia is forced into independence from the Soviet Union.
June
FOX News goes on air: "faux news/fox noise" ruins the professional level of news reporting.
July
God was Born!!! Repent, all ye sinners!
August
The Summer Olympics in Atlanta, Georgia. To have foreigners in a place filled with hicks can get interesting. Release the peace doves and rednecks with shotguns shoot them all down.
September
President Clinton convinces everyone to reelect him in the Democrat(ic) National Convention.
October
Some crazy crap happened, oh, and Halloween. Insert obscure reference to 90's culture here, maybe a joke from an old website or something. Netscape! Yeah!.. Etc.
November
- November 5 - Clinton reelected by a wide margin (Fox News premiered by false theories Dole will take it all). Conservative talkers pissed as hell and Bob Dole goes on his life by appearing on commercials talking about "erectile dysfunction."