Ariana Grande
.jpg) A pair of butterflies try to eat Ariana Grande. | |
| Background Information | |
|---|---|
| Birthdate | June 26, 1993 BCE (age 1620) |
| Birthplace | Florida |
| Years active | 2008 to present |
| Genre | Pop, R&B, gay music |
| ... | |
“Yuh.”
Ariana Grande (not to be confused with Ariana Gandhi) is an Italian American who tries her best to look Latina even if she never has stepped her foot in any Latin American country (which she probably thinks it's all Mexico, anyways). She's a singer-songwriter (who can't even sing properly), actress, retired professional donut-licker, Mariah wannabe, and gay rights activist.
Early life[edit | edit source]
Ariana Grande was born in the beautiful state of Ohio, to her parents. Her family moved to Florida afterwards, because life was even better there. Before blasting into stardom, she was a hardcore hockey fan. When she turned eight, her parents separated, causing her father to go shopping for milk. On this point, she started her career as a theater actress, and continued on in the entertainment industry. She has an older half-brother who is a big gay phoque.[1]
Ariana Grande was raised as a Roman Catholic, but she left the religion upon learning the evil teachings from Pope Benedict. She is currently a believer of the teachings of Kabbalah, or Magical Judaism.
Acting career[edit | edit source]
Ariana started her career in children's theater and, at age 13, decided to enter the music industry. At the same time, she became an actress under Nickelodeon, where she was exploited by the evil being known as Dan Schneider. Her first big role was starring in the teen sitcom Victorious, where she had the role of Cat, a teenager with special conditions who often spent her time licking the toes from her feet.[2] This role led to her next show, Sam & Cat, where she was paired with the butch blonde from iCarly. Apart from those shows, she also was a voice actor in the overtly-stereotipically-girly cartoon called Winx Club.
Musical career[edit | edit source]
Ariana's role in a dumb TV show that was often seen by dumb teenagers paved her way to stardom. She released her first single in 2011, but she disowned it because it was too cringe for her. Two years later she released her legitimate debut album, Yours Truly. In 2015 she unapologetically started her donut-licking career, while saying she hates the beautiful Land of the Free and Home of the Brave. Learning that it could spread disease, she apologized and retired from donut-licking after a few days. Later on she would continue to release musical hits such as "Problem", "Break Free", "Dangerous Woman", "thank u, next", "7 Rings", "GiaW",[3] "Breathing", "Positions", and her magnum opus, "Yuh." She is also known for her collaboration singles, such as "Stuck With U", with Justin Bieber; "Santa Tell Me", with We The Sus Music, and "Bang Bang", with Jessie J and Nicki Minaj.
Artistic style[edit | edit source]
Ariana's songs are mostly in the pop and R&B genre, while incorporating EDM and hip hop in some of her tracks. She is also a Mariah Carey wannabe, always imitating her operatic style of singing, even her operatic voice cracks, which are caused by her forcing her voice to break the music sheet. Aside from Carey, Whitney Houston, Destiny's Child, Beyonce, Celine Dion, and Madonna served as musical influences. She is also known for the exxessive use of the word yuh in her songs, probably because of listening to Metallica inside of the womb, and mishearing James Hetfield's iconic "Yeah!" as such. Her excessive use of yuh resulted in her making an entire song, even an album of her just singing it repeatedly.
