Forum:Uncyclopedia Survey

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Stalkers' Heaven

that's right, folks, it's time for an official user survey! it's like on of those annoying chain mail letters or facebook note things, but this one gives you candy when you fill it out! just copy the survey below, add your own header at the bottom, and fill that sucker out. after all users have taken the survey, we will sit by the campfire and make s'mores and sing kumbaya. SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 15:03, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

The Survey

Username:

Age:

Location:

Uncyclopedian since:

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?:

Your first page viewed:

Your first edit:

Favorite articles:

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia):

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details:

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:

What's with that username?:

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded:

put your john hancock here:

i suppose i'll start

Username: Gerrycheevers

Age: 23

Location: boston, MA, USA

Uncyclopedian since: july '07

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: someone posted a link to bears in the facebook group 'for every 944,000 people to join this group, one will be mauled by bears'.

Your first page viewed: bears, as above

Your first edit: i added an oscar wilde quote to Jurassic Park. it was removed, then restored in some capacity.

Favorite articles: bears, moon hoax, Battle of Gettysburg

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): futurama, newsradio, the simpsons (the good years)

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): obviously the legends at the top of UN:HS. led's approachability has always impressed me. modus' never-ending stream of funny is even more impressive considering he consistently tests negative for performance enhancing drugs (and also he won't stop leaving cups of urine on my doorstep). and of course, my heterosexual man-crush on Mhaille is the driving force behind all of my actions.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: i am a lowly analyst, soon leaving boston for the barren wasteland of north dakota to attend grad school. i enjoy candlepin bowling, hockey, and various video games.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 7, cheevers (no relation)

What's with that username?: i maintain a vanity page that should explain

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: probably when i showed my significant other some of my work, and she didn't believe i was capable of writing it.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: rage, sadness, uncontrollable anger, sadness again, hunger

put your john hancock here: SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 15:03, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Saber

Username: Saberwolf116

Age: 14

Location: Midwest, US of A

Uncyclopedian since: November '08

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I was searching Wikipedia for various wiki references, and stumbled upon Uncyclopedia.

Your first page viewed: I'm pretty sure it was Bat Fuck Insane.

Your first edit: Nominating Ape-Shit Crazy for VFH.

Favorite articles: None in particular, though I do like some of the cliches, I.E Oscar Wilde.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Late night comedians and modern day U.S. politics satire, I.E. Jay Leno, Conan O'Brien, and Stephen Colbert.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): I enjoy first person articles that are written in accordance to their title, such as You don't want to know.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I enjoy reading 20th century novels, and playing Runescape.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: HAW HAW HAW

What's with that username?: I've been using it for the past 3 years on every online community I join.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: When I won ROTM.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Meh. I'm a vegetarian and health addict, so I didn't care.

put your john hancock here: The default. Yes, i'm really that bad. Saberwolf116 15:15, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

You know what the music means...

Username:YouKnowWhatTheMusicMeans

Age:15

Location:Central Florida, USA

Uncyclopedian since: March 2009 as an IP, April 2009 as a user.

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I think I read wikipedia's article about it...

Your first page viewed:Redundancy, way back in 2006

Your first edit: George Clooney (as an IP), Responding to Necropaxx's review of my Hydrogen article (With my username)

Favorite articles:KITTENHOEFFER magazine stand, J.D. Salinger, Hydrogen, Red Lobster

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): The Onion's Our Dumb World book, Wikipedia, The Onion, The Daily Show too many others to mention.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Looking at crappy articles.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I play the saxophone in the school band and really like grilled cheese sandwiches. Outside the school band, I (randomly) play the Ukulele. I prefer to write on a typewriter and some of my articles are first drafted on a Olivetti/Underwood 21 made in 1967. Oh, and I enjoy music from Pink Floyd, The Beatles, Yes, and other pretentious bands.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: No, thanks

What's with that username?:It's a reference to the show Dr. Katz, Professional Therapist, each show ended with Katz saying the line " Oooh, you know what the music means, our time is up" to one of his patients while the credit music started.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: When Hydrogen got featured.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: I don't know about you guys, but I got candy from the other users.

put your john hancock here:You know what the music means... Our time is up. 15:46, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Todd Lyons

Username: Todd Lyons

Age: 251 days younger than Mhaille. Really.

Location: Ontario, Canada

Uncyclopedian since: 27 October 2005

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I was actually looking for real information, but I don't recall what. After reading the front page I thought, "Wha? No... wait. Mmmph! This is better..."

Your first page viewed: Main Page

Your first edit: A new article, Dwight Schultz (very first save). It wasn't instantly deleted, and I thought, "Ha! I might have the hang of this!"

Favorite articles: Too many to list, and I don't want to exclude any. Yeah, that's right. I'm totally copping out. :)

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): SCTV, The Kids in the Hall, Trailer Park Boys, Heywood Banks...

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Mhaille, Some user, Hardwick Fundlebuggy, Savethemooses...

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: When I started here, I was a social worker. This place often reduced my stress, though sometimes added to it. Now I'm a social policy advisor, so Uncyclopedia continues to provide me with interesting, light reading. And occasional stress.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 98-786-532-1, Lamb

What's with that username?: Blame my parents.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Being made an admin, then winning Noob of the Month 4 days later. That was some crazy month...

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Wha? Then what the hell have I been chewing on all this time?

Put your john hancock here: --Major Sir Todd Lyons GUN WotM MI UotM NotM MDA VFH AotM Bur. AlBur. CM NS PC 16:24, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Guildy

Username: Guildensternenstein

Age: 18

Location: Buffalo, NY, USA

Uncyclopedia since: 17 January 2009

How I found it: Googling "liberal logic," I think

First page viewed: Don't remember, first page I searched was John Madden, though

First Edit: Cleaned up Rex Grossman

Favorite Articles: Citizen Kong, John Madden, can't think of any others

Humor inspirations (off Uncyc): Political satire, The Simpsons, Peep Show, Monty Python's Flying Circus, etc.

Humor inspirations (Uncyc): User:GlobalTourniquet, User:Mhaille, User:Cajek, User:Hardwick Fundlebuggy

Real Life Stuff: I work at Burger King, and am attending the University at Buffalo. I am in the Honors Program there. I made the Dean's List last sememster. I also like art films, progressive rock, politics, postmodern litearture, and anything else that makes me seem like a pretentious prick. Also, football. And I'm a Nazi.

Proudest Uncyc. Moment: getting Metal Gear Solid featured.

Sig: —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 16:55, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Communist.

Username: Communist.

Age: ITS OVER 9000!!!!!!

Location: Russia somewhere

Uncyclopedian since: errr a few months now

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: some guy hotlinked it so i followed and found this i was like 'ALL THESE PEOPLES ARE MAKING FUNNYS'! so i joined up

Your first page viewed:american war victories

Your first edit: errrrr finding out how to put up a pic then doing it on an article

Favorite articles: niggerlodeon, usa, somin bout anime and thats it i think

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): killing people

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): killing people with armor plated dildos

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: student

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 98475668765456847563546576867587968573534265860687998869845736 дерьмо

What's with that username?: It really does speak for itself, listen................SEE SEE HEAR THAT HUH HUH???

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: im that sad i dont have one

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: AAHHH FUCK!!

put your john hancock here: im putting my whta were now?

sig:-- Communist.  (talk) 17:13, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

UU

Username: Under user.

Age: about to start my mid-life crisis.

Location: Norwich, UK.

Uncyclopedian since: Summer '07.

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: was working at Norwich Union and someone sent me a link to that article.

Your first page viewed: uhh, Norwich Union.

Your first edit: created my userpage with a message saying I probably wouldn't contribute much, starting a proud tradition.

Favorite articles: see here.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Spike Milligan, Terry Pratchett, Bill Hicks, The Young Ones, Monty Python and, oddly, Charles Dickens.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Modus, Cajek, Hardwick, Procopius, Mhaille, Mordillo, Led, Gerry, Thinker and others.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I'm a low-level web developer - I'm not really any good at it but no-one seems to have told my boss. I do a little gaming, listen to loud music, watch too many movies, read a lot, and am a bit of a pretentious whisky bore.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: if only someone could tell me - I've lost my cash card again.

What's with that username?: Crap, innit? I honestly thought I'd use the account, like, twice, hence under-using it. By the time I came across the idea of creating a new account or asking Sannse to change my name, people already knew me as UU, so it kinda stuck.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: probably getting the Signpost past the one year mark - I know Caj and Skull started it, and Gerry writes the best issues, but I'm still kinda proud of it.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Candy? I've heard of that, it's American for "Chocolate that isn't as tasty as the stuff we get in Europe", right?

put your john hancock here: your john hancock (someone had to do that, I suppose)

--UU - natter 17:20, Jun 15

Modusoperandi

Miscellaneously Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: making this picture of me, me.

Username: Modusoperandi

Age: 97

Location: Easter Island (secret lair)

Uncyclopedian since: 2005

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I don't remember.

Your first page viewed: One of the Jesus', probably. Maybe Canada.

Your first edit: PBJ. We all have to start somewhere.

Favorite articles: Pretty much everything that Hardwick wrote.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Any show that's enjoyed by both the very young and the very stoned.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Hardwick & Procopius.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Wetwork, mostly. I'm naturally moist.

What's with that username?: I got a high score on some game back in the day, and was so excited that, unable to control the controller, I mashed in the name: MO.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: That time I wrote that thing that one time. It was awesome.

Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:25, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Aha, now to put my secret plan in action. Men, to the aeroplane, and set course for Easter Island! Procopious is cool too. -- Hindleyite Converse • ?pedia 18:35, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Hyperbole

Username:Hyperbole

Age: 31

Location: Reno, NV

Uncyclopedian since: June 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: In 2006, this guy e-mailed me and told me I should look at it. I thought "Huh, a bunch of random jokes about Chuck Norris, Oscar Wilde, and Steve Ballmer. Okay." Then for some reason I came back two years later.

Your first page viewed: The now-deleted Gondola Of Death.

Your first edit: Probably Gondola Of Death. I think I added Steve Ballmer to the page. I was later reverted. Update: Wow, the article still exists, and still mentions Ballmer? I could have sworn someone had already taken care of that.

Favorite articles: Definitely iCarly. All the other articles can go to hell.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): I watch too much TV.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): So So. Cajek. Cap'n Ben. Others.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I work for a biotech company and play in two bands.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 326... hey, wait!

What's with that username?: Name of solo music project: Ayatollah Hyperbole. Reason for name: None.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: That time I wrote That time I was nearly raped by a gay English teacher trying to sell me a free iPod during my sojourn in Canada during my sojourn on Uncyclopedia.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Lack of surprise. The candy is a lie.

put your john hancock here: pillow talk 17:26, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Dexter is a sexy beast

Username:Dexter111344

Age:17 as of June 3rd (but only RDB, Socky, and OptyC wished me a happy birthday, so fuck everyone else).

Location:Somewhere near Atlanta, Georgia. Definitely not Columbus, Georgia, though. Nope.

Uncyclopedian since:First edited as an IP in Feb. 2006, user since August 22nd, 2006

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?:Found it by pressing Special:Random on Wikipedia.

Your first page viewed:Don't know. Probably Holocaust Tycoon.

Your first edit:Created Worst 100 Pick-Up Lines of All Time as an IP.

Favorite articles:A wizard did it & I don't appreciate your attitude towards my potato chip situation.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):The gardener man who touches me in naughty places, Jimmy Hoffa, and Chairman Mao.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia):No one. You all suck badly.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details:Pill addict and high school predator

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:I killed my mother and blew up a bank. Both at the same time.

What's with that username?:Yes.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:Whenever I leave it.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded:FU SPANG!!!

put your john hancock here:Why do you want to touch my cock? MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 17:37, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Woody

Username: The Woodburninator

Age: 20

Location: Maryland

Uncyclopedian since: June 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Came here when I was in high school, but just looked around. Laughed at a bunch of articles. Left and didn't look back for another 2 or 3 years. Then decided it would be a good place to put my psychotic ramblings. And the rest, as they say, is history.

Your first page viewed: I remember seeing AAA! and Little boy who lives down the street years ago. First one I remember looking at when I came back was SysRq's UnBooks:My New Life as a T-Rex

Your first edit: Created and started Thou

Favorite articles: A lot of them. Talk:Sania Mirza, Turing Duck Test, Little boy who lives down the street, and Fisher Price: A Retrospective come to mind, but there are many others.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Stewart/Colbert, Seinfeld, conversations with my friends, who are all funnier than I could ever hope to be.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Modus, Cajek, Mickey, So SoRandom articles based on what I'm doing at the time.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Student, about to finish school. Summer job right now. Listening to Tom Jones at my computer as I type. Other details very boring in comparison to listening to Tom Jones.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 54238792872. Maiden/Married name didn't change.

What's with that username?: It's a play off my last name. Also, fire is fun. Also, I have redish hair. Also, herpes...

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Probably when Thinker voted for one of my articles on VFH

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: I never expected candy. No one likes me enough to give me candy. Except that one creepy guy in the van...

put your john hancock here: Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:55, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

ImNotASunbeam

Username: ImNotASunbeam

Age:20

Location:Plymouth, England

Uncyclopedian since: October 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Looking for silly news stories

Your first page viewed: Guinness

Your first edit: Toucans

Favorite articles: The fact that you don't want a poodle and Oscar the Grouch

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): News stories, Dylan Moran (His attitude), Charlie Brooker and previous jobs

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): RabbiTechno

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Student studying Theatre and Performance go me; I go ginger in the summer.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 555819257381 Same as above

What's with that username?: It's inspired by the song Jesus don't want me for a Sunbeam by The Vaselines, but I prefer Nirvana's version better.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Currently nominated for the Foolitzer Prize

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Disappointment, chronic masturbation and a higher dosage of prozac.

put your john hancock here: ImNotASunbeam 21:15, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Orion Blastar

Username: Orion Blastar that is Blastar and not Blaster, Orion Blaster is not me but someone else.

Age: I'm getting too old for this kind of stuff

Location: St. Louis, MO, USA, the most dangerous city in the USA according to CNN because I live there.

Uncyclopedian since: 2005 I'd like to say earlier but time travel has to be involved.

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I was posting on countless forums as a fake conservative Orion Blastar much the same way that Stephen Colbert does on his show but with an Andy Kaufman/Tony Clifton twist. After countless misunderstandings and being branded a jerk, dick, sociopath etc for my sense of humor that nobody understands I was told on Slashdot or something to take my nonsense to Uncyclopedia where they tolerate it. Now I make fun of both sides and everyone else to be fair.

Your first page viewed: Slashdot

Your first edit: attempting to make an article about myself, in which I was told kindly to move it to my user space.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Mad Magazine, Saturday Night Live, Andy Kaufman, Blue Collar Comedy Tour, etc.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Basically everyone inspires me to be funnier and not just stupid.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Space Pirate Ninja from 4096 AD oh wait, real life? Computer Programmer and Computer Geek.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Your trojan horse program already stole it from me.

What's with that username?: It is a name I use in an alternative universe where I am a space pirate ninja in 4096AD

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Being named Uncyclopedian of the Month

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: The candy is a lie!

put your john hancock here: --Lt. Sir Orion Blastar (talk) 22:24, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Roman Dog Bumber, put it on your bumber

Username: Roman Dog Bird

Age: 18

Location: New Jersey, Amurikka

Uncyclopedian since: November 2006

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: There used to be a page on some Japanese comic series that I like. I clicked a link to it, and I was hooked. The page was eventually deleted for sucking ass. I made some edits to it at one point, including some "jokes" that only I would get.

Your first page viewed: One Piece. See? Gone.

Your first edit: yea this is probably it

Favorite articles: Gay People.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): My dog and my nephew. And this one crazy bastard that I know from school. And Neil Hamburger, America's youngest comedian.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): None.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: High School Student going on College Student. I am a lazy fuck.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 94124, Nixon

What's with that username?: It's a song by the greatest band ever, the Melvins. They are better than any other lame ass stupid band out there. Some people think the songs title is actually "Roman Bird Dog". I think that doesn't sound cool at all.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Coming to terms with the fact that I am indeed a "MOTEHR FUCKING NIGGER FAGGOT"

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Doesn't bother me at all.

put your john hancock here: -- Roman Dog Bird 22:54, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

gwax on, gwax off

Username: gwax

Age: 26

Location: San Francisco, CA

Uncyclopedian since: September 29, 2005

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: friend's referral

Your first page viewed: Main Page

Your first edit: Quoting Oscar Wilde on the easy confusion of Taxes and Texas.

Favorite articles: VFD

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Monkeys

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): QVFD

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: scientist/engineer/statistical liar

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 3

What's with that username?: gwax <= G. Waksman

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: The first time in Uncyclopedia's history when VFD was under control.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Asked if the cake was also a lie.

put your john hancock here: --Sir gwax (talk) 23:22, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Steps

Username:Staircase

Age:14

Location:San Diego, CA

Uncyclopedian since: Like twenty days ago

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?:Wikipedia

Your first page viewed:Unaware

Your first edit:User:Staircase

Favorite articles:UnBooks:Grandma's House & Really Big Tree

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):?

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia):?

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details:I'm still in school

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:333?

What's with that username?:I was walking down stairs once

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:when i discovered i liked salad

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded:dunno

put your john hancock here:Staircase CUN^t 23:26, 15 June 2009 (UTC)

Colin "All your base" Heaney

Username: Colin "All your base" Heaney.

Age: 15.

Location: Milwaukee, Wisconsin. It isn't actually in America, it's an anomaly somewhere in the mid-west.

Uncyclopedian since: Sometime in the early months of 2007.

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I was shown by a friend.

Your first page viewed: Cthulhu.

Your first edit: ???

Favorite articles: My Sojourn, Flying Spaghetti Monster, The white guy in All-4-One.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): David Sedaris, Jerry Seinfeld, Woody Allen, Dave Chappelle.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Hyperbole, Modusoperandi, Cajek

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I sit on the internet all day, and sit and play video games and shout non-sequiters into grocery stores.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 666, Ethine.

What's with that username?: Meh. I've been on /b/ for 5 years, memes stick with me.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: I made a My Sojourn article.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Outrage.

put your john hancock here: Colin ALL YOUR BASEHeaney! Casa Bey Superfly Portfolio 03:06, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Orian57

Username: Orian57

Age: 19 (wish I was younger but feel older)

Location: Highlands, Scotland

Uncyclopedian since: December 1^st 07

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Given a link to the Ted Haggard article, which I rather enjoyed.

Your first page viewed: Ted Haggard

Your first edit: This, aparently I'm still as funny as ever!

Favorite articles: Without a doubt UnBooks:Tarquin Middleton: My Battle with Depression. Close seconds include: The Dog Dies at the End, UnScripts:Average Cop, UnMovie Review: The Dark Knight and more recent ones: UnTweets:George Peterson and UnBooks:Uncyclopedia Brown and Wikipedia Brown solve the mystery of the missing smugglers and their hidden cave or something.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): TV comedies mostly, never really started reading humour untill I got here except from Charlie Brooker. Peep Show influenced Neurotic quite heavily.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Everyone really. If not thier articles then talk page banter is pretty much great from everyone,

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Trying to write a Novel. I'm still miles off actually finishing anything or getting published but that is the eventual goal.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 5757, Orian

What's with that username?: pft, something to do with a boy I fancied when I was 15. Not even I really remember anymore, I just use it for everything now. Google it if you fancy.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Why?:Am I a Power Ranger? makining it into the top 10 of 08.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Fear. If you can lie about that what else are you lying about?

put your john hancock here: You want me to do what?

   Orian57    Talk   07:08 16 June 2009

Mahm00shA

Username: Mahm00shA

Age: 18

Location: Giza, Egypt

Uncyclopedian since: January 2009

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: BJAODN

Your first page viewed: That stupid page with a fucking long title about a mug of coffee or something

Your first edit: Boy

Favorite articles: Boy, Dragon Warrior, among others

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Egyptian street jokes

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Hardwick Fundlebuggy, Cajek, Hyperbole

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I study medicine at Cairo University.. Nobody cares

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 100000857401/Omm Mahm00shA

What's with that username?: A stupid name my mom used to (and still) call me

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: My first feature

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: JIHAAAAD!!!

put your john hancock here: Colour Sig For Make Mahm00shA Look Cool 08:25 June 16 '09

Sycamore

Username:Sycamore McWhore

Age:21

Location:Glasgow, Scotland

Uncyclopedian since:Early 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?:Pissing around on Uni libraries

Your first page viewed:The Main Page

Your first edit:I think it was my userpage

Favorite articles:UnBooks:The Adventures Of Baron Ringpiece, Paradise Lost, UnBooks:Notes From The Underground

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):BBC Four

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia):Mhaille, ENeGMA, Immreliazed

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details:Currently a student about to head into my third year (How I got this far baffles scientists). As far as hobbies I like reading and fencing. I sometimes watch television.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:No chance

What's with that username?:It's in many songs along with Trees, which I like.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:Getting my first feature

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded:I have a terrible upset stomach, so it's probably for the best.

put your john hancock here:I never saw the film. Oh, --Sycamore (Talk) 10:48, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh man, Imrealized is a god. How could I forget about him? -- Hindleyite Converse • ?pedia 18:40, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Sycamore

Username:Zheliel

Age:142

Location:<blatant lie>I live in on Venus, Daveluyville/

Uncyclopedian since:Well, 3 months?

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: My friend. [[User:<insert name here>|Thunderboi]]

Your first page viewed:Melancholy

Your first edit:Noodlefever *embarassed*

Favorite articles:Benson, Zheliel, Game:Everquest, Main Page

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):Teachers rambling on with their nonsense. It's fuinny, actually.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia):<insert name here>. <insert name here> is my hero!

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details:I'm 142 years old, and I am a student.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:1464-14775-353B, and my mom's maiden name is <insert name here>.

What's with that username?:It's a private joke. *snicker* you won't know.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:Almost getting my first huff.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded:Oh, I remember. I cried in the toilet. It was so sad. I will have my revenge one day.

put your john hancock here:

User:Zheliel/sigz2 11:02, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Sonje

Username: Sonje

Age: 23

Location: Glasgow, Scotland

Uncyclopedian since: 18 February 2009

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Googling for something random which escapes my memory at present.

Your first page viewed: Main Page

Your first edit: Answered Gerry's image request for Dead Man's Hand at RadicalX's Corner.

Favorite articles: Fisher Price: A Retrospective, UnScripts:Genesis, Episode II: In the Garden of Eden, The Porchesian Holocaust, Star Wars (Japanese Opera) Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Douglas Addams, Terry Pratchett, Cyanide & Happiness, Blackadder

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): RadicalX, Modusoperandi, most of the people on the upper end of the HS list.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I have a job that allows me to inconspicuously potatochop silly images without being spotted but most of my time is spent song writing or at band practice, so if your pic request is taking long, blame my guitarist for being a slave-driver.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Seriously?

What's with that username?: Very uncreative move on my part... it's my name.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Getting NotM and PotM in the same month.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Oh, I'll get my candy! Just you wait Mr. Cheevers!

Put your john hancock here: --^Dame 11:45, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

Socky

• Username: Sockpuppet "Socky" of an unregistered user
• Age: Something around 20 and already getting too old to remember my exact age.
• Location: Someplace in Belgium.
• Uncyclopedian since: With this account, August 2008. Was around since way longer ago though.
• How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I'm pretty sure Wikipedia is to blame for that.
• Your first page viewed: No idea. Main Page maybe?
• Your first edit: With this account, something at Forum:Delete IRC.
• Favorite articles: The good ones.
• Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): The joys and hardships of life. And some of the stuff happening around the world.
• Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): The mad geniuses and regular cool people that hang out here.
• Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Going to college. If I don't pass this year, I might drop out and start some political career or something though.
• Bank account number and mother's maiden name: I don't fucking know, okay?
• What's with that username?: I started out as some IP's sockpuppet. Weird huh?
• Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Being nominated for UotM (repeatedly) and getting all kinds of positive comments. And also winning it eventually.
• Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Fatigue. Boredom.
• put your john hancock here: You don't deserve my cock! —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 12:12, 16 June 2009 (UTC)

-player2-

Username:-player2-

Age:14

Location:Hell.. i mean england sorry..

Uncyclopedian since:start of year

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: by typing "pedia" on google by mistake

Your first page viewed:home page

Your first edit: earth

Favorite articles:nothing

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):nothing

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia):nothing

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details:games

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:WTF??

What's with that username?:Don't ask, i think i play games too much lol

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:When i created my first article, HowTo:kill someone with a spoon

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: no comment

put your john hancock here: - player2- 12:26, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

OptyC

Username: Optimuschris

Age: 36 (Shut up.)

Location: North Dakota

Uncyclopedian since: Feb. 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Don't remember. Think I was looking for advice on how to kill myself.

Your first page viewed: HowTo:Kill Yourself With A Brick

Your first edit: Minor edit to Fargo

Favorite articles: Change daily, though Alliteration and I don't appreciate your attitude towards my potato chip situation remain in the top five.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Futurama, Monty Python, Them starving African kids

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Modus, UU, T among many others. It took me months before I got the nerve to register because I was so intimidated by the talent displayed here.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Auto parts sales/Playing video games, watching TV, smoking/That's all you need to know.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:153663- HEY, WAITAMINUTE!

What's with that username?: It's been my e-mail username since forever, use it as a username wherever I go because the mary-jane doesn't allow me to remember more than one.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Meh. Uncyc brings me nothing but shame.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: The orphans are going to be so disappointed.

put your john hancock here: OptyC Sucks! CUN14:47, 16 Jun

Luverly Cuddly Wuvvy

Username: Luvvy

Age: Physically? Mid-20's. Work stress-wise, pushing 46

Location: Helsinki, Finland

Uncyclopedian since: February 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: An ex of mine linked me to some article. Then I started reading on.

Your first page viewed: Hmm... First one I think I remember for sure is Finland, then this article came in handy. Oh! That aforementioned ex linked me to Ecky-Thump.

Your first edit: This is embarrassing, I just had to fix some spelling.

Favorite articles: Hmm... I like the intelligent kind of humour.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Monty Python, Bill Bailey, Douglas Adams, Club Krapula (Swedish Finnish comedy group, don't ask), Eddie Izzard, Spike Milligan, A few books titled Outrageously Offensive Jokes and Truly Tasteless Jokes I can keep listing these as I come up with 'em.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Mhaille (Bless), 'Dilly and Dad.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I work in a place where my tolerance for teenagers, women and immigrants is greatly reduced every day. Off-work, I'm pwned by a cat. Other hobbies include gaming (favourite gaming platform is the coffee, dinner or living room table...) and occasional running, swimming, walking of dogs and gardening (pots on the balcony, don't have a garden).

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 200000103... Wait, that's the first half of my library card number... Ah well. Mother's maiden name? You don't need to know. Blondes who get mad at you for losing their interner button while tidying up their laptop aren't exactly maidens.

What's with that username?: Pinning the courtesy title kids of barons get "The Honourable Lady Viktoria" would be just too long, so it slowly but efficiently boiled down to Luvvy.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Hmm... "Winning NotM?" Actually, managing to come back earlier this year after an extended hiatus.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Reaching for my bag of crisps and going for the last bucket of B&J's super chocolatey chunky icecream.

put your john hancock here: -- DameViktoria - (Contribs) - (Talk) - (Block log) 17:57, 16 Jun

TLB

Username: TheLedBalloon

Age: 17 in about a week

Location: Usually Norwell, Massachusetts, but currently at Stonehill College for Boys State

Uncyclopedian since: April 2007

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Friend at school showed me when we were all vandalizing wikipedia

Your first page viewed: Main Page

Your first edit: this one

Favorite articles: Protect and Survive, Fire hydrant, Normal, UnBooks:Coming of Age Tale, Harry S. Truman, UnScripts:Average Cop, UnTunes:Bobby Brown Goes Down (PMRC Edition), UnBooks:Tarquin Middleton: My Battle with Depression., and probably a bunch more that I'm forgetting.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Stephen Colbert, John Stewart, Mitch Hedburg, Ron White, This is Spinal Tap, Wayne's World, Zoolander, Space Balls, Monty Python, Garth Marenghi's Darkplace, various cartoons I watched as a younger child on Nickelodeon/Cartoon Network

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Hardwick Fundlebuggy, Ljlego, Modus, HerrDoktor, Mordillo, e|m|c, So So, EnEGMA, and probably a bunch more that I'm forgetting.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Hockey, tennis, trumpet, writing. Also school.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 12345 and password.

What's with that username?: Led Zeppelin reference, mostly.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: The nods for VFS, WotY, and UotY were all awesome.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Homicide. And lots of it.

put your john hancock here: - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 18:36, Jun 16

Mhaille

Username: Mhaille

Age: 251 days older than Todd

Location: Liverpool, UK

Uncyclopedian since: May 2005

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Lost in the mists of time....

Your first page viewed: Kitten Huffing....laughed so much I couldn't breath and had to read it in sections

Your first edit: Kate Bush, I think....

Favorite articles: Finding Your Inner Sock Puppet, UnBooks:Embracing Mediocrity, UnBooks:My New Life as a T-Rex, New Age Psychology, Escher and numerous others...

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Monty Python, Mighty Boosh, Douglas Adams, Jonathan Swift

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Too many to mention.....

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Technical Director for an online Risk Management service, and CEO of my own business

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Erm.....no.....

What's with that username?: Its my surname in its original Gaelic

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Helping Kakun to get his first feature, inspiring Todd to stick around, and the kind words people said the year I was up for Uncyclopedian of the Year.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Hey, me and Candy are fine, so she lies now and again.....

put your john hancock here: Sir Mhaille  (talk to me)

Pilot 2.0

Age, 15 (almost 16)

Username Pilot 2.0

Location Palmerton, PA USA

Uncyclopedian since November 2008 ?

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website? I was looking for something and just happened to discovered it. best day of my life!

Your first page viewed, bill gates.

Favorite articles Dog, aspload, aaaaaaaaa, to much to list.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Larry the cable guy, MAD tv.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Student, Flight simmer

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: I'll never tell

What's with that username?: Im a die hard flight simmer thought it was appropriate.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: None (Yet)'

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

put your john hancock here: Pilot 2.0

So fast! So furious!

Username: So So

Age: 31

Location: Saitama, Japan (Born U.S.)

Uncyclopedian since: February 2006

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Wikipedia.

Your first page viewed: Probably the main page

Your first edit: Street Fighter

Favorite articles: Perfect Disaster, The white guy in All-4-One, Really Big Tree

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): The Simpsons, the Onion, MST3K, Japanese humor in general

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Mickey, Tompkins, Jordanus (Hammer, Africa), Tighter14 (I maed a yuky doody)

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Translator / Closing in on 1,200 online wins on Street Fighter IV

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: No bank account; I keep my money in a big burlap sack / Thundersex (pronounced "toon-dehr-sex" -- it's Albanian)

What's with that username?: Cao Cao of Romance of the Three Kingdoms is pronounced Sousou in Japanese

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: All of them were crushed when I found out about the USERNAME trick... No, but seriously, probably WotM

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Smacked a ho. Had more to do with the fact that she was a ho than about the candy, though

put your john hancock here: --S0.S0S.0S.0S0 06:35, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

*Dawg pokes his head out*

Username: Dawg

Age: Older than you, but not as old as zim (he's older than dirt). Also not as old as many of these rest home denizens. Damn, you people are old.

Location: Sandy Eggo. Come on down, I'll stuff some tacos in you.

Uncyclopedian since: Sometime in 2005

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I do not recall. Google search? Someone linked me? It's probably somewhere in an old edit.

Your first page viewed: Unknown

Your first edit: Look it up yourself and fill this in. I can't be arsed.

Favorite articles: Mostly old stuff. It's hard to choose, though. Some one-liners beat or make entire articles, though. Thank you, Mhaille.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): My late broheeze, originator of the concepts for some of my greatest articles. My sister and I can generate crazy stuff, too, when together. Look out, we might just write an article that looks like a parody of something that happened, but will actually happen in the future, because we have mad skills like that. She and I have been working on a concept for a practical joke that will be simultaneously played on literally millions of people worldwide, which is why I haven't had the time to edit here much. Also Monty Python.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Most of my British comrades. Living there must make you crazy.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Senior Software Engineer. I develop software and firmware that is kind of "James Bond"-ish. I am basically a real-life member of Q's R&D group. When I started at uncyclopedia my incredibly dull job was writing software for tracking clients of a company that did high-priced call-horses for the rich and famous. Olipro was (is?) one of their clients. Bob Barker and his wife were also clients. You should have seen that poor yearling after his wife gleefully cut out one of it's testicles. Seriously, I couldn't make this shit up.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 40743207227, Clark

What's with that username?: A nickname I picked up about a decade ago. My current nickname is "the stud", "the studman", or just "stud". Oddly enough, this came about due to an off-the-cuff joke about a small battery-powered device used to find wooden structural members within a building. I said, "Why do you need one of those? Can't you see I'm right here?". Total shock and awe, the best kind of joke.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: When I said, "I swear, if Nintendorulez dies before me, I will chip "Euroipods" on his tombstone."

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: “I will kill you...just once.” ~ Tompkins on lying about candy

put your john hancock here: » Brig Sir Dawg | t | v | c » 2009.06.17.18:08

Here Heerr Heeve sod it, Hv

Username: Heerenveen

Age: 16

Location: Cannock, U.K.

Uncyclopedian since: February 2007 (bloody hell, it doesn't feel like that long!)

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Misspelling the White Stripes song in Google.

Your first page viewed: Ecky-Thump.

Your first edit: UnStory

Favorite articles: UnScripts:To'Romisha, Ecky-Thump, Merde, She Wrote

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Nothing any good, which is my excuse for being such a below-standards writer.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Todd Lyons, Mhaille, Modusoperandi, Procopius, Braydie, Cajek

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Student, currently failing everything, plays drums awfully, likes food.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: If I knew myself I'd tell you.

What's with that username?: I was looking at Dutch football clubs at the time I joined the place, and immediately regretted doing so.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Getting nommed for UotY (and then summararily getting beaten by an IP)

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Then what on this Earth did I just eat?

put your john hancock here: –—Hv (talk) 17/06 20:40

WAITAMINUTE! Hv's only 16? GODDAMMIT, I'm taking my age off my survey! -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:45, 17 Jun

Yeah, that's liek half your age isn't it?    Orian57    Talk   20:46 17 June 2009

Less than half. You damn kids. -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:49, 17 Jun

What with our swivel-hipped "rock-n-rollers" and our souped-up hot rods that we race and such. Colin ALL YOUR BASEHeaney! Casa Bey Superfly Portfolio 20:54, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

Oh yeah, sorry. Half you're age would be UU. Which would sort of imply you're outstaying your welcome. Damned elderly, I could be using that oxygen.    Orian57    Talk   20:55 17 June 2009

I swear if you tell me UU is still a teenager too I'm going to kill myyself. -OptyC Sucks! CUN20:57, 17 Jun

UU isn't a teenager. Yet.    Orian57    Talk   20:59 17 June 2009

He is married though. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:37, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

pft forget reality.    Orian57    Talk   21:48 17 June 2009

Seriously though, we shouldn't judge people by their age, but rather by their talents and flaws. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 22:09, 17 June 2009 (UTC)

Yeah, we know. I'm just kidding.    Orian57    Talk   22:14 17 June 2009

Um, seeing as I have no talent and too many flaws to count, I'd prefer if you just judged me by my age. -OptyC Sucks! CUN14:16, 18 Jun

Necropaxx!!

Username: Necropaxx

Age: 17

Location: Suburb of Los Angeles, USA

Uncyclopedian since: Apr. '07

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Friend from school who left Uncyc, like, a week later. But I was hooked.

Your first page viewed: Homeless Nerds

Your first edit: I randomized a sentence on Napoleon Bonaparte. Then I template spammed. And got banned. Thanks, Famine.

Favorite articles: Too many to list

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Pff. Who needs anything else besides Uncyc? Come to think of it, though, I do think Berke Breathed is very funny.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Modus, Cap'n Ben, Procopius, Cajek.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I am a graduated high school senior, getting ready for college up at BYU, where I will major in Computer Engineering.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 1234567890, Yeahright

What's with that username?: Explanation on my userpage... Necro & Pax + X

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Adding my name to the Hall of Shame, + seeing each of my featured articles on the Main Page is so fulfilling.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded:I KNEW it! You LIAR!! /runs away crying

• • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 21:58, Jun 17

Clemens177

Username: Clemens177

Age: 40

Location: Springfield, Illinois

Uncyclopedian since: April 28, 2009

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: My boss at the time had a sonic wall that blocked most things, but not this. Boy howdy it should have, though, as this is a sure great way to fuck off at work.

Your first page viewed: I'd have to look, but it was either a Robert Heinlein one, or adding to an economics page.

Your first edit: The Heinlein or Economics page.

Favorite articles: My own, of course. Were any of you under the impression that modesty was my strong suit?

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): I inspire many humorous forums, including The Onion and The Daily Show.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Actually, many of you write some screamingly hilarious shit. Thoroughly enjoyable!

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I'm a Director of a non-profit Foundation, and caretake it's property.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 4037 7597 2775 8598, that's my Visa card as I don't have a bank account. The three digit number on the back is 553, it expires 08/12, the street address 1313 Mockingbird Lane and the zip is 90210. Name as it appears on the card is Josephine Baer, maiden name is March.

What's with that username?: Samuel Clemens, and 1.77 is the square root of my favorite number.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Will be when I get an article featured on the front page and win the Writer of the Month award.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: That could be a problem. In retaliation, I shall probably only publish one UnNews article today instead of the two I had planned. So there.

put your john hancock here: Clemens177 02:58, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

Is this guy serious about the Visa card? Only one way to find out! /sneakily makes a purchase... • • • Necropaxx (T) {~} 23:40, Jun 19

SisReck

Username: SysRq
Age: 17
Location: Waco, TX
Uncyclopedian since: November 2006
How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I seriously don't remember. I think I was looking up something about Thomas Hobbes.
Your first page viewed: Thomas Hobbes I guess.
Your first edit: DDR
Favorite articles: Neurotic. G Rated Talking Animal Movie. A bunch of aristocrats fucking. Awesome vid. HowTo:Rob A Bank With Your Penis. Turing Duck Test. There are others I do not remember right now.
Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Oh hell, nothing I can remember right now.
Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Orian57, Cajek, Dr. Skullthumper, Under user, Modusoperandi, others.
Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Student at Baylor University, currently unemployed. I produce music, write a webcomic, maintain a Twitter, and drink Dr Pepper.
Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 481-51-62342, George
What's with that username?: It's a button on most PC keyboards. Strange, as I use a Mac.
Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Getting three features in a week. Starting IC.
Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: I knew this was too good to be true.
put your john hancock here: —Sir SysRq (talk) 03:55, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

You're from Texas?!?! ~ 07:38, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

And why is everybody older than me ;( User:Zheliel/sigz2 07:55, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

Because we had the common decency to be born before you. Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 17:49, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

I am indeed a rootin' tootin' Texan. I thought you guys knew that. I lived in Virginia for a few years, but my dad retired from the Marine Corps and so we moved back home. —Sir SysRq (talk) 17:11, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

God damn son! So do you know Walker? You know, the Texan Ranger? Is he as cool as they say he is?! ~ 15:43, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

...YES —Sir SysRq (talk) 17:23, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Romartus

Username:Romartus

Age: Orwellian - Divide by two

Location: London.UK

Uncyclopedian since: December 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?:Can't remember.Perhaps something I trod in.

Your first page viewed:Possibly Sonic the Hedgehog. However that would be in the logs.

Your first edit:No Idea. Probably something historical. Charge of the Light Brigade ?

Favorite articles:Todd Lyons Doctor Kinsey's hamster study. And that he allowed me to top and tail it without threatening a ban. Articles by Zarbag,Sog1970,Guilderstenstein,Zana Dark/Prettiest Pretty always catch my attention besides Todd Lyons, Sycamore, Under User - honorable mentions. I really don't mind the rest of the work here though the worst ones resist oblivion with disconcerting regularity.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):Monty Python.Lewis Carroll.Victor Borges.Private Eye Magazine.lots. I don't think I do justice to my humour sources.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Todd Lyons. He struck me as someone who was possibly was over 18 here judging by the articles he was putting up on VFH.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Journalist/Photo Editor

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Bishop Ussher 4004 B.C. Just after tea.

What's with that username?: CD Rom Artus. Liked the combination - just dropped the CD.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:Talking to Cajek about my first Pee Review. Also enjoy the VFH and VFD pages. Some go to praise..some to slag off but it is nearly always funny.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Candy is dandy but liquor quicker.

put your john hancock here:--RomArtus*Imperator ® (Orate). 15:43, 18 June 2009 (UTC). What about Alcock and Brown ?

Gert5

Username: Gert... five?

Age: eitgh

Location: East Onion Country

Uncyclopedian since: 2006, early days those were

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: That... other wiki.

Your first page viewed: Main Page :P That "Jesus cleanser product" article was featured on that day.

Your first edit: Uh, you should take a look at this

Favorite articles: YYOY, really, I have so many...

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): None, you don't really think I'm funny, do you?

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): None.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: You mean... HALF-LIFE!!!

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 454142, Mhaille

What's with that username?: Numbers, they looked cool at the time

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:Worst Cuntcyclopedia-related gayment: Figured out that I have no redeeming value, now or never

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU- wait, unfounded? I thought you said unfunded. Kay then.

put your john hancock here: your john hancock

Since I just so happened onto this page...

• Username: Iseditor
• Age: 14
• Location: Gainesboro, Tennessee
• Uncyclopedian since: 8/1/08
• How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Link on a website
• Your first page viewed: Can't remember
• Your first edit: Creating my userpage.
• Favorite articles: Bat Fuck Insane, Vandalism/example on wheels!, sdrawkcaB
• Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Youtube Poops, www.engrish.com
• Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): See "Favorite Articles"
• Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: A student at a high school
• Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Dont have a bank account number/Angie
• What's with that username?: I chose it for no particular reason
• Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: ???
• Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: ???
• put your john hancock here: --iseditor.user ^Comments/_Criticism

KneeChee27

Username: KneeChee27
Age: 19 and two days, as of right now.
Location: Sporadically-from-the-east-to-the-west-coast-though-always-bordering-Canada, USA
Uncyclopedian since: The Twelfth of May, Two-thousand and Eight
How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: A random forum post linking to the article "Carmine"
Your first page viewed: Carmine
Your first edit: Carmine
Favorite articles: Favorites? Psshaw!
Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): US Politics
Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Every other request made at RadicalX's Corner
Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Student/Potato-chopper/Procrastinator
Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Which one, and which one?
What's with that username?: (Random Philosopher x Oversimplification of his Last Name) + Arbitrary Number = Kickass Username
Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: This!
Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: I'll just have an Oreo.
put your john hancock here: — KneeChee 03:19, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

TDM

Username: TheDudeMan
Age: 17
Location: Florida
Uncyclopedian since: April 07
How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: a wikipedia facebook group
Your first page viewed: Fucked if I remember
Your first edit: My talkpage, putting in stuff that should have been in my userpage, which is why i never got {{welcome}}
Favorite articles: hmm... some of the old 07 features
Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Fucking with people
Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): i dont quite know
Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Student, I took up free running a few months ago, gyar
Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 76, Jim
What's with that username?: It was randomly on my mind when i signed up, and yea
Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: I FUCKING WON POO LIT SUPRISE 08!
Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: NO! BUT I WANT MY CANDY! :'(
put your john hancock here: 8===> Oh wait HANcock Lieutenant THEDUDEMAN Dude ... Totally UOTM KUN GotA F@H 04:08, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Brad A. Frasier

Username:Bradaphraser

Age:30

Location:Oklahoma

Uncyclopedian since:2005 (is that really 4 years ago?)

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?:BluesNews

Your first page viewed:some programmer I'd never heard of's page. I think it's been deleted

Your first edit:Added this sentence to Adolf Hitler: "Hitler was widely considered the greatest humanitarian who ever lived by German newspapers from 1933 to 1945."

Favorite articles:it changes weekly, I'm quite fond of Are you colour-blind? this week

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia):"Weird Al" Yankovic

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia):User:KP, originally

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details:Teacher, unfortunately

Bank account number and mother's maiden name:1234567890 and Marmalade

What's with that username?:I found it in a box of Cracker-Jacks my grandpa kept from the '40s. Figured it had to be worth SOMETHING.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment:When I made WotM

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded:Well, at least I'm still alive...

put your john hancock here:--<<>> 16:20, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

El Jek

Username: Cajek

Age: 26

Location: central California

Uncyclopedian since: June 2007, I think?

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: You know... I don't remember.

Your first page viewed: Probably cheese, because I figured, Hey, that's a funny word! How wrong I was.

Your first edit: I added a paragraph to that same article

Favorite articles: UnBooks:My First Necronomicon, iCarly, Template:Cowbell, Slappy's Angels

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Stephen Colbert, Jon Stewart, Liberal Comedian. Believe it or not, I mostly just watch the news and c-span.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): TLB, who, as my adopter, really influenced my "crazy" style, Modus, whose random comments on the forums are cool, SysRq, Cap'n Ben, Gerrycheevers and lots of others, such as FUCK MY TIGHT LITTLE ASS and Grawp... nah, just those last two.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Grad student (almost) who proofreads essays, tutors psychology, and is going to try to become a substitute teacher in the Fall.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: that's personal information, buddy

What's with that username?: When I was in middle school, me and my other outcast friends made up names of companies with our initials for some middle school reason. "Cajek" is from my initials, CJK.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: My first feature and getting recognition for changing Pee Review. There was also a forum started by TKF (DID I GET IT RIGHT?!?!) that said he didn't like how much influence Pee Review had on Uncyc. That felt good and bad simultaneously (no hard feelings).

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Suicide. And lots of it.

put your john hancock here:   Le Cejak • <16:52 Jun 19, 2009>

"Random"?! You're just jealous because I've been shootin' at the walls of heartache (bang, bang). Sir Modusoperandi ^Boinc! 18:14, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

whoa! he called you 'cool', and he himself is cool! that must make you like...nifty! SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 18:26, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

So THAT'S what Cajek means! Also, you mentioned me! Hot damn! —Sir SysRq (talk) 18:30, 19 June 2009 (UTC)

Eh? I made a forum that said that? -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 00:46, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Chedds

Username: CheddarBBQ

Age: 17

Location: Italia

Uncyclopedian since: February 19, 2009 ( 4 months today!)

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: A guy I talked to online told me about it, but he said it was for something totally different. He got permabanned his first day here.

Your first page viewed: Um... I think it was sexual innuendo.

Your first edit: Creating AFI

Favorite articles: Sexual innuendo, HowTo:Get Over Jenny, HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw, and a bunch more.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): My school, my brain, a bag of Doritos.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Umm... pass.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I was invited to attend the International Young Leader's Conference this year, and will be attending in September. Also, I'm 6'4".

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Don't know and Don't Know (though I probably should...)

What's with that username?: Smokin' Cheddar BBQ Doritos, the greatest thing on earth.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Writing HowTo:Get Over Jenny, and featuring it. Oh, and adopting my adoson (adopapa didn't forget)

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: I've got Do-Ri-Tos. Candy sucks compared to that.

put your john hancock here: Don Puttano cHeDDs 21:03,19June,2009

Mickey

Username: 15Mickey20

Age: 23

Location: Surrey, the poshest part of England. Think Connetticut, but with rich people.

Uncyclopedian since: August 2006.

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: It was linked to on a wrestling forum I used to frequent.

Your first page viewed: Tom Cruise.

Your first edit: Tom Cruise.

Favourite articles: Civil War, UnBooks:The Night I Slept with Björk, The Gathering Horror, Turing Duck Test.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Chris Morris, especially Brass Eye.

Humour inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Procopius.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I'm working in the civil service. Some people might have noticed that I quite like tennis. I also fucking rule at Countdown.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Jones and 15567302878. That's the account I keep my countdown prize money in.

What's with that username?: Mickey is a nickname from university. The numbers come from a character in Chris's Morris's sitcom, Nathan Barley, called 15Peter20.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: talk:Sania Mirza.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: I took it quite well. A bit of light self-harm, nothing major.

put your john hancock here: -- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey)  14:52, 20 June 2009 (UTC)

Interesting how the article Tom Cruise looks a lot worse in the present. —Sir Socky (talk) (stalk) GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:06, 20 June 2009 (UTC)

Multiliteralist

Username: Multiliteralist

Age: I saw Mhaille's age being used as a comparison there so I'll do that too: about 4 years older than Mhaille.

Location: Helsinki, Finland, Europe, Earth, and so forth

Uncyclopedian since: I think September 2008

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: a friend on the ICC mentioned it in his finger notes

Your first page viewed: Probably front page

Your first edit: no idea

Favorite articles: no

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): the world?

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): um

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: you can guess most of them, and on top of all that, paddling

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 5, Multiliteralist

What's with that username?: It's my mother's maiden name

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: this here

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: YOU SUCK

put your john hancock here: -- Style  Guide 14:37, 21 June 2009 (UTC)

Trousers McCoy

Username: PantsMacKenzie

Age: Older than I once was, younger than I'll be.

Location: Chiba, Japan

Uncyclopedian since: a couple days after time began.

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Jon said, "Hey, I made this website..."

Your first page viewed: Main Page

Your first edit: A-Team

Favorite articles: Absolute Power

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Oscar Wilde, Zach Morris.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Everyone.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: English Teacher/Children/My mother

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 8675309, Jenny

What's with that username?: I wear Pants. Sometimes.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Ninja-opping Splaka

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: None. I promised the Candy

put your john hancock here: John Hancock --PantsMacKenzie 14:08, 22 June 2009 (UTC)

According to my userpage, I love you... Was that too forward of me?   Le Cejak • <14:47 Jun 22, 2009>

Dr. Amadeus M. Skullthumper

Username: Dr. Skullthumper

Age: 18

Location: New Jersey, United States of America, Earth, Sector ZZ-9 Plural Z Alpha

Uncyclopedian since: 2007ish or something like that

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: I think I found a link to it from Wikipedia's BJAODN (since deleted)

Your first page viewed: Don't remember. I think I went through the Windows-related articles, though.

Your first edit: Citten

Favorite articles: You Are Dead, Three word article, Walls, among lotsa others. It's been too long.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Douglas Adams (The Hitch-hiker's Guide to the Galaxy), Terry Pratchett (of Discworld fame), John Kennedy Toole (A Confederacy of Dunces), Ryan North (Dinosaur Comics), Chris Hastings (Dr. McNinja), Monty Python, Black Books, and Portal.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Lots and lots of people. RAHB and Ljlego in the audio department, Cajek in the off-the-wall department, Savethemooses and Modusoperandi in the whole forum wit thing, it goes on and on, seriously.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I write quite a bit. Just recently started an online novel because writing offline has become kind of inconvenient for purposes of adding, sharing, and editing.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Eight, and no answer.

What's with that username?: Came from a skit in drama class called "Doctor Skullthumper". I think I went through two or three other usernames before registering and actually editing with this one.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: I've had lots! Getting my first feature, having someone say "call me a Skullthumper fanatic" on VFH only two or three features later, becoming admin... I think my favorite though was when I started blogging and everyone followed. Whatever happened to your blogs, guys?

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Grabbed an emergency chocolate bar.

put your john hancock here: – Sir Skullthumper, MD (criticize • writings • critchat) 17:01 Jun 23, 2009

Hindleyite

Username: Erm, Hindleyite

Age: Age of Umpires

Location: Wigan, which is on an island called Britain.

Uncyclopedian since: April 06.

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Most probably Wikipedia's now-defunct BJAODN.

Your first page viewed: Something about the Australian derby. I thought it was quite good at the time, but guess what? It's been deleted now. Oh whoop de doo!

Your first edit: This. Mint, eh?

Favorite articles: Toilet Door Communication, I Fucking Hate the Bermuda Triangle, Cabbage, Uncyclopedia:Administrators (a lot of those policy pages are funny too), most stuff by Hardwick and some other articles I can't recall right now.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Daily Sport

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Does Testostereich edit here? I'm gonna say him, Hardwick, David Gerard (yes, him, believe it or not), Mhaille, THE, and anybody I else I forgot to mention. And STM.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Occupation: Professional TV Watcher. Pastimes: Watching TV.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Pin No.: Probably 1111. Mother's Maiden Name: Guinevere.

What's with that username?: Dunno, weird, isn't it? Nah, it's where I live.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: None.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Made some spaghetti.

put your john hancock here: What the hell is that supposed to mean? Hate to tell you, but I'm not that way inclined.

Now to read all the previous entries and find everyone else has already made all those (pants) jokes. -- Hindleyite Converse • ?pedia 18:28, 23 June 2009 (UTC)

Rape And Homophobic Beatings

Username: RAHB

Age: 19

Location: Los Angeles, California

Uncyclopedian since: February 28th, 2007

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Friend of mine linked me to the Jimi Hendrix article. The line "Jimi Hendrix invented the electric guitar and LSD" had me hooked.

Your first page viewed: Jimi Hendrix

Your first edit: Terrible...

Favorite articles: Ode to the Monotony of Life; Star Wars (Japanese Opera); Folgers Crystals; UnBooks:Ronnie James Dio's Big Book of Nursery Rhymes; UnBooks:Tuesdays with Maury; UnBooks:Surgical Phone; others, I'm sure...

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): THINKER; Upright Citizens Brigade; Home Movies; Early Family Guy; Getting high at college parties

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): THINKER; Cajek; So So; Todd Lyons; emc; Prettiestpretty

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Audio Production major at Art Institute of Los Angeles, perpetually unemployed, cigarette smoker and gin drinker.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Columbus, Ohio

What's with that username?: Wouldn't YOU like to know?

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: That one time with the thing.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: That's what YOU think!

put your john hancock here: RAHB 10:51, 24 June 2009 (UTC)

Flutter

Username: The sound of f(l)apping, Flutter

Age: 13. Damn young compared to most Uncyclopedians.

Location: Los Angeles, California (South Gate)

Uncyclopedian since: July 29, 2007

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Don't remember well, acually when I was looking at Wikia's largest wikis page (this was after I left that Neodex wiki). The sentence "some of which aren't about Oscar Wilde or Kitten Huffing." brings me back to the olden days.

Your first page viewed: Unencyclopedia

Your first edit: BACON!

Favorite articles: Mostly my own, but others like WWE, Planets, Really Big Tree, Long cat, Zork, Call of Duty 4: Modern Warfare, Casper The Friendly Ghost, Youtube Poop, Niggerlodeon, Nickelodeon, Kittenolivia, moogles and all the pages in Category:Self-reference

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Final Fantasy (used to be), Friends (mostly), Neopets, WordGirl, my own school

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Everything Un parodies.

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: 9th grader this fall, Neopets user

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: N/A and its Arias (last name)

What's with that username?: Well first, I went through different names, and of Flutter, well I was looking at the Mario wiki and well I wanted a shorter username.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: When I realised Uncycopedia was fun.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Hard candy?!?!?! WTF?

put your john hancock here: —Flutter (Talk•Games•Fun Pages•Awards•Help) 03:51, 2 July 2009 (UTC)

The Colonel

Username: Col.swordman, "The Colonel", "popcorn kernel", "that crank"

Age: Not as old as Zim, but not as young as Gerry.

Location: Somewhere down under outside your pants

Uncyclopedian since: Late 2005

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: That damned thing they called "Google"

Your first page viewed: How are people supposed to remember crap like this?

Your first edit: This place (I still can't believe this is true, but the edit history never lies... or so they say.)

Favorite articles: I am yet to be that impressed, unfortunately.

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): My own cynicism. It flows in my blood.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Whoever I have a beef with. (Am I not friendly?)

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Answer to 1st: Don't wanna tell. Answer to 2nd: This place. Answer to 3rd: Forget it.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: Even if I leave those details here for real, will you be bothered enough to try them?

What's with that username?: Well... Because it would be stupid to walk around and call yourself "Butt Monkey"?

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Now that's a tough question...

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: I just wrote "the candy is a lie" on a brick wall in red paint, took a picture and spam the crap out of the Internet with it. No joke.

put your john hancock here: -- The Colonel (talk) 16:01, 5 July 2009 (UTC)

nachlader / 7achlader / nach7ader / nachlade7 / 777777777

if it's anything for those who were offended by my neglection of the site

Username: james

Age: eighteen on the eighteenth of july next

Location: east anglia

Uncyclopedian since: 2005

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: link from "this is a promising site" list

Your first page viewed: unsure

Your first edit: can't remember

Favourite articles: don't know. i suppose alliteration and redundancy were early hooks

Humour inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): spike milligan, paul merton, monty python, mitchell & webb, ben elton, mark lamarr

Humour inspirations (Uncyclopedia): i never check who edited what

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: find me and we'll talk

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 0155988311770 / burke

What's with that username?: multiple meanings

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: when you finish an article

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: semi-accelleration into the nocturnal/personal drive

put your john hancock here: ---kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 23:53, 5 July 2009 (UTC)

Feckmaster Flex

• Username: Thekillerfroggy
• Age: Freshly 18
• Location: New Yawk, just outside of Queens
• How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Via a frequent poster on a subforum of the forums of the internet game Kingdom of Loathing. The guy was named Hinoa, and he told a bunch of us to edit...
• Your first page viewed: The Kingdom of Loathing page. I didn't, but I looked around the place and liked it, so I bookmarked it, forgot about it, then came back in...
• Uncyclopedian since: April 2006, where I made my first edit (and Doors joke), implying that...
• Your first edit: The End was not, in fact, my only friend.
• Favorite articles: The Keep Your Finger In The Box Game, Volcano, Quality, UnNews:Nigerian census finds millions of rich, desperate princes, John Cage, anything by So So, and many others, almost all of them written before mid-2008.
• Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Flight of the Conchords, Robert Crumb, Matt Groening, Steven Colbert, two guys from Wesleyan that I met for a day and changed my life forever.
• Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Mhaille, So So, Ljlego, Electrified mocha chinchilla, Procopius, The Thinker. It's also worth mentioning my administrative influences, since I mostly just do maintenance nowadays: MadMax, Roman Dog Bird, and Flammable.
• Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I write a lot and listen to music and, recently, I write about music. I got a stint at a website writing music reviews, but it's a "whenever-you-get-around-to-it" thing that pays in experience and free unreleased music, and I haven't had much intitiative to pursue either of those payments in earnest, lately.
• Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 1295, same as the price of a large coke and a cheeze Pizza at the place I used to work at: Panucci's Pizza.
• What's with that username?: Back when I was young and discovering how to use search engines, I started googling random words and seeing what websites came up. I tried "kill frog" and came to an animation site I found pretty funny at the time. Its influence stuck in my username, though I rarely go by Thekillerfroggy anymore outside of Uncyclopedia (and most people just know me as TKF, anyway).
• Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Becoming admin at the same time as Mordillo, then watching the love for him grow and the love for me wilt over the ensuing months.

  Also, getting nominated for UotY, casting my lot behind Algorithm, then watching both of us get crushingly defeated by MadMax.

  On the other end of the spectrum, watching Filial Piety get slammed down every month is severely humbling.

• Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Fuck you die fuck you die fuck you die fuck you die
• Put your john hancock here: T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 00:19, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

...Just outside of Queens, you say? I shall have to come looking for you when I return from Japan. I live in Queens, you know. --PantsMacKenzie 22:08, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Cool :D I'll probably be in Boston for all non-holidays, though. College, and all. -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 22:19, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Love for me grow? I didn't have a date for decades! ~ 22:26, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

Boston, you say? I shall have to come looking for you when I return from slackerville. I live near Boston, you know. - T.L.B. WotM, UotM, FPrize, AotM, ANotM, PLS, UN:HS, GUN 00:21, Jul 7

might you be able to at least vaguely hint at what college you attend? SirGerrycheeversGunTalk 01:07, 7 July 2009 (UTC)

What? I thought that would've been enough. You mean that there's more colleges in Boston besides Tufts? -- T​K​F​​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​UU​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​U​CK 05:03, 7 July 2009 (UTC)

Ape

• Username: An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays
• Age: 19
• Location: Ireland
• Uncyclopedian since: 200X
• How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: Link from some forum.
• Your first page viewed: Main page
• Your first edit: Some shitty article about flesh eating bananas.
• Favorite articles: Dunno
• Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Stewart Lee, Dylan Moran, Bill Hicks, The Onion, South Park, Seth McFarlane, Dara O'Briain, Have I Got News For You, Mock The Week, that kinda shit
• Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): HTBFANJS
• Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: I play guitar, smoke weed and study maths.
• Bank account number and mother's maiden name: No.
• What's with that username?: Desperately trying to be funny so you guys would validate my childhood
• Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: Winning PLS
• Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Arousal
• put your john hancock here: -- cozy Ape (annihilate) (Riot Porn) 23:42, 6 July 2009 (UTC)

NaturalBornKieler

Username: NaturalBornKieler

Age: 46

Location: Germany

Uncyclopedian since: 2007

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: When I visited the German Uncyclopedia and found out it's an international thing

Your first page viewed: The front page, probably

Your first edit: The Holy Spirit

Favorite articles: HowTo:Throw a temper tantrum, UnBooks:Official Informational Guide to the 2008 Beijing Olympics Games, Eurovision Song Contest, Printer Ink

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Many German satirists, cabaret artists and comedians, like Kurt Tucholsky, Erich Kästner, Robert Gernhardt, the Titanic magazine, Monty Python.

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Visiting the Portuguese Uncyclopedia and finding detailed articles about remote places in Germany there without understanding more than one or two words of them

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Software developer, owning a big old farmhouse with my wife and tinkering around at it all the time.

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: My mother is about to marry for the fourth time soon and pretty much forgot about her maiden name. And what should I do with a bank account?

What's with that username?: It's the simple truth, I was born in Kiel, Germany.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: When people seemed to read and even understand the English I wrote, and when they pretended to understand the jokes.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Only a little disappointed. You're cheated everywhere so why not here?

put your john hancock here: NaturalBornKieler (talk) 07:54, 7 July 2009 (UTC)

Halsoft

Username: Halsoft

Age: 18

Location: Green Bay Wisconsin

Uncyclopedian since: Im thinking 2007

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: My friend was on this site during social studies. Eventually we were both kicked out of class.

Your first page viewed: Hitler

Your first edit: The legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time

Favorite articles: Silent Hill 2, Teachers

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Myself

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): The other side of Myself, Porn, Family Guy, Real life, Porn

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Dj, Music Mixer, Music Editor, Remix Artist

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 749037250750248758042758 Floyd

What's with that username?: It's really the olny user name that has never once failed to work without needing to add a bunch of numbers or the word THE. Seriously. And I like the company.

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: I printed off the Teacher article and was laughing about it in class and my teacher took it and started reading it and burst out laughing. I still got suspended. Asshole.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: What. When did you promise candy? Oh you asshole. Who reads those words at the top?

put your john hancock here: --I am Justice! aka: Halsoft. 02:59, May 11, 2010 (UTC)

Dougal

Username:DougalthePanda

Age: 20

Location: Cardiff

Uncyclopedian since: Been reading it since I was about 15 or 16 only started editing around christmas time

How did you stumble across this ridiculous website?: embarassingly enough i think it was via encyclopedia dramatica *hangs head in shame*

Your first page viewed: probably evolution or hitler

Your first edit: A Russian Reversal

Favorite articles: Little Adolfs School Report

Humor inspirations (off Uncyclopedia): Terry Prattchet, Eddie Izzard, Douglas Adams, Futurama

Humor inspirations (Uncyclopedia): Featured Articles!

Occupation/Pastimes/Other Real-life details: Scientist, swimming, water polo, reading, and xbox

Bank account number and mother's maiden name: 010010100101 Jeff

What's with that username?: Dougals my nickname and i fucking LOVE pandas

Proudest Uncyclopedia-related moment: The IC version of Creationism getting featured.

Reaction upon learning that promises of candy were unfounded: Massive disapointment, followed by the bright realisation that i have some in my bag...

put your john hancock here: --DougalJabber at me. 15:14, May 11, 2010 (UTC)