Babel:ARCL

Main Page

Welcome to Uncyclopedia, the content-free article that anyone can edit 41,118 subpages in English

Politics Games Music

Science History Art

Television Film Theatre

Society People All Portals

“I've never seen such urination-arity!”

– Oscar Wilde on this page

“This is the Main Page”

– Captain Obvious on this page

As it happens, a Main Page is a page of primarity, popularity and urination-arity Today's featured paragraph The microwave oven is a rectangular box, usually white in color, which is used to heat up random objects such as tin foil, doll heads, frogs, and other small creatures. Microwave ovens are found in kitchens all over the world, and have been featured in thousands of online videos made by middle school aged teens. Microwaves have also been recognized as the head chef of many establishments, such as Olive Garden. Often called a nuclear oven as opposed to a conventional oven, this infernal device could only be conceived by the cruelest minds in the DEEPEST PITS OF HELL, most undoubtedly conceived by such abhorrid demon philosophers as Heinrich Himmler, Jack the Ripper, and Al Gore, in a fashion that Lucifer's own damned, radiating evilness served as a rudimentary template of unholy culinary design, the microwave is an ingenious yet simple device used to burn food around the edges, turn bacon into rubber, make biscuits into hockey pucks, burn water, create civil unrest in African countries, stale a newly opened can of Guinness, cancel your favorite TV sitcom, interrupt your wireless internet connection, excommunicate the Pope, and explode hamsters by zapping them with rays of concentrated evil. Rays of concentrated evil cause atoms to become angry, thus raising their temperatures. When turned on, a microwave oven goes bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzyyyyyyyzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz! (Full article...) Recently featured: UnBooks:Harry Potter Summarized in Less Than a Minute UnNews:Trump awarded another Nobel Peace Prize for ending war in Venezuela he started three hours ago Frodo Baggins I love you brah Archive – Vote for featured articles You know you're WTF when... Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 396,464 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 396,464 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 396,464 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 396,464 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 396,464 total flamewars purged. Advertising Did you know... *... that removing the rubber bands from the claws of a Lobster can result in oh god get it off get it OFF OH GOD MY FACE! ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time? ... that removing the rubber bands from the claws of a Lobster can result in oh god get it off get it OFF OH GOD MY FACE! ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time? ... that removing the rubber bands from the claws of a Lobster can result in oh god get it off get it OFF OH GOD MY FACE! ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time? ... that removing the rubber bands from the claws of a Lobster can result in oh god get it off get it OFF OH GOD MY FACE!	In the news "Nyaaah, it's not worthless, mommy, I WANT IT!" Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland (Pictured) Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Buffalo Bills owner Terry Pegula proven to be clueless, fires the wrong guy Denver Broncos quarterback Bo Nix accidentally curses himself in playoff win Starmer announces plans to make tweeting illegal in the UK Trump given yet another Nobel Peace Prize for ending war he started 3 hours ago Kansas City Chiefs impulsively fire Missouri as home state, moving to actual Kansas after missing playoffs UnNews wishes to all users a merry December Holiday Dick Van Dyke is 100, bitches! ICE spotted stealing everyone's ice cream in America North Sentinelese discover fire, accidentally burn down entire island Elon Musk: "Cancel Netflix! I don't care if Max wakes up." 6 or 7 buildings burn in Hong Kong Labour approval hits record low during Starmer premiership, PM resorts to "getting down with the youth" The New York Yankees now fucking suck Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI and Spaceballs 2 • Rich New Yorkers fleeing Mamdanistan • Larry Sanger's war on Wikipedia • Non-Bears invading Tennessee • Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Venezuelans unsure whether to freak out or celebrate • Bills Mafia and Josh Allen drinking themselves to death • New England Patriots fans being insufferable like it's 2016 Recent deaths: Brigitte Bardot • Carl Yastrzmski • 2025 • The MetroCard • Stranger Things • Kali • Vecna • The Upside Down • the other Black guy from John Carpenter's The Thing • Bob Weir • Scott Adams • Kianna Underwood • Buffalo Bills', San Francisco 49ers', Houston Texans' and Da Bears' seasons • Bo Nix's ankle • Sean McDermott's Bills tenure Not dead: Eleven Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • NYC's economy • Weed • 67% of people trying to understand why 6 of 7 news stories mention "6-7" • Dick van Dyke, eventually • Netflix • Dancin' Maduro • The Kansas City "Chiefs" • Broncos' Super Bowl hopes without Bo Nix • Aaron Rodgers' career • Bills' Super Bowl window On this day... January 22: National Cover-Up Day 0 - The Messiah was definitely born to a virgin and not the result of a time-travel religion scheme. 1605 - Guy Fawkes was definitely not a secret Protestant double-agent trained to make Catholics look bad. 1914 - The squirrels had absolutely nothing to do with the assassination of Franz Ferdinand. 1952 - Adolf Hitler is obviously not swimming in the frozen Arctic sea as a merman after a radiation experiment gone wrong. 1977 - AIDS was not at all created by the FBI and pinned on the CIA after they won the inter-agency tennis match last summer. 2001 - The Twin Towers were definitely not brought down by the Swedish as revenge for all the shitty Ikea jokes. 2016 - The perfidious Russians never spent millions on Vermin Supreme's presidential campaign.
Featured picture Imagine a world in which the sum of all human knowledge is in your hand. Image credit: SunnyChow View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
edit Recent Articles Why is book? Halloween Ends Stranger Things (rw) G.I. Jane G.I. Jane 2 UnTunes:Santa Baby This is not an Article, it's a Sandwich Fairytale UnTunes:Shoes Uncyclopedia:Business (rw) Halloween Kills UnTunes:Perry the Platypus Elon's Musk UnGames:Ultimate Fishing (rw) UnTunes:Rio Herodotus (rw) Brawny Lawnmower-Humvee (rw) Steve Wozniak (rw) Narrative (rw) Bryan Adams High School Alex Trebek Lincoln Logs Brexit Where Is Everybody? UnTunes:Animal (with actual animals) Avi Toledano Eli Roth Film (remake) African American Worst 100 Reflections on 2018 Ray Charles Bernardo Butterlucci Urban Dictionary More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push
Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

Uncyclopedia's sista projects
Uncyclopedia is hosted by the Uncyclomedia Foundation, a non-profitable organization that also hosts a range of other projects as well as some foreign language Uncyclopedias and Illogicopedia. UnNews News on crack Uncyclopedia The content-free encyclopedia Undictionary Best left unsaid UnTunes Noisy things UnGames Ways to waste away HowTo Like Ikea without the pictures UnBooks Content-free books Unquotable Useless misquotes Uncycloversity No student loans UnPoetia Dreams deferred UnDebate Debate the irrelevant UnScripts We ruin stage too Why? Because UnReviews Hack frauds UnVoyage Armchair travel Uncyclomedia The Foundation
Uncyclopedia Languages
This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 41,118 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including ARCL!: Uncyclopedia English United Kingdom 41,118 Desciclopédia Português Brazil 50785 アンサイクロペディア 日本語 Japan 19194 Nonsensopedia Polski Poland 17766 Nonciclopedia Italiano Italy 14423 Désencyclopédie Français France 8936 Inciclopedia Español Spain 12400 偽基百科 正體中文 Taiwan 6417 Uncyclopedia.de Deutsch Germany 6330 Hikipedia Suomi Finland 7300 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Other Uncyclopedias 백괴사전 한국어 South Korea 6303 ไร้สาระนุกรม ไทย Thailand 3132 Pekepedia Tagalog Philippines 275 Bodohpedia Bahasa Melayu Malaysia 105 伪基百科 汉语 Commie China 8269 איןציקלופדיה עברית Israel 2187 קיינציקלאָפעדיע יידיש Yiddish 46 Tolololpedia Bahasa Indonesia Indonesia 6054 Ndhablek Basa Jawa Java 14 Goblogpedia Basa Sunda Sunda 11 Yansiklopedi Türkçe Turkey 762 اللاموسوعة العربية Iraq 976 نانشنامه فارسی Iran 943 ანციკლ ოპედია ქართული Georgia 4 Uncyclopedia.km ភាសាខ្មែរ Cambodia 1 Spademanns Leksikon Dansk Denmark 9095 Ikkepedia Norsk Norway 4563 Ikkjepedia Norsk (nynorsk) Norway Psyklopedin Svenska Sweden 2497 Անգրագ իտարան Հայերեն Armenia 4 ວິກິພີເດຍ ລາວ Laos 8 Valenciclopèdia Català Andorra 1060 Nunyepedia Asturianu Asturias 59 Desgalipedia Galego Galicia 5009 Oisquipèdia Occitan Occitania 33 আনসাইক্ল োপিডিয়া বাংলা Bangladesh 17 Φρικηπαίδεια Ελληνικά Greece 2812 Celwyddoniadur Cymraeg Wales 103 Scotypedia Scots Scotland 10 Frithchiclipéid Gaeilge Ireland 19 Kengencyclopedia Lëtzebuergesch Luxembourg 7 Нециклопедија Српски Serbia 456 Neciklopedija Bosanski Bosnia 27 Neciklopediju Hrvatski Croatia 303 Butalopedija Slovenščina Slovenia 31 Википедија Македонски Macedonia 175 Oncyclopedia Nederlands Belgium and Holland 2807 Kwatsjpedia Limburgs Limburgs 21 Necyklopedie Česky Czech Republic 3530 Necyklopedia Slovenčina Slovakia 1888 Unciklopédia Magyar Hungary 1731 Оксипедия Български Bulgaria 234 Neciclopedie Română Romania 167 Uichipedia Молдовеняскэ Moldova 4 Інциклопедія Українська Ukraine 1117 Абсурдопедия Русский Russia 4466 Ebatsüklopeedia Eesti Estonia 96 Neciklopēdija Latviešu Latvia 159 Juokopedija Lietuvių Lithuania 267 Neciklopedio Esperanto Esperanto 3176 Unsaiklopedia 𐌲𐌿𐍄𐌹𐍃𐌺‬ Goths 14 Necyclopædia Latina Vatican City 279 Hatsiklopedia Malagasy Madagascar 8 Zombiepedia Zombie Chapel 7 Pagecount statistics listed above were updated on November 1, 2016. Article (Main) • Eald Ænglisc (Old English) • Babelfish • Blog • CafeMess (CafePress) • We get signal. (Engrish) • Galactic Basic Standard • Hitlerbear • Lietuvių Jiaunimų kalba • iHumor (Apple) • 1337 (Leet) • Re: PharmaccgRy (Mail Spam) • 조선말 (North Korean) • Newspeak • Nub (N00b) • Wildeizms (Oscar Wilde) • Manx (Pirate) • Middle Egyptian (Hieroglyphic) • Napulitana (Neapolitan) • Trekkies • Simple English • Testament • AAAAAAAAA! (Vagrant) • Vèneto (Venetian) • Tiếng Việt (Vietnamese) • White Nationalist (White Supremacist) Complete list • Multilingual coordination • Requests for new languages

Protected by the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas.