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As it happens, a Main Page is a page of primarity, popularity and urination-arity Today's featured paragraph Recently featured: Bill Clinton Buffalo Bills UnGames:Garlic bread Orchid Archive – Vote for featured articles You know you're WTF when... Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 398,044 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 398,044 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 398,044 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 398,044 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 398,044 total flamewars purged. Advertising Did you know... ... that Albert Einstein's likeness has been used to sell pornography? (Pictured) ... that The Oldest Trick in the Book was first chronicled in cuneiform by the Ancient Sumerians, who lived on the windswept steppes of Mesopotamia? ... that Calvin and Hobbes was an action-packed buddy comedy series that ran from 1542-1549, featuring philosophers John Calvin and Thomas Hobbes as themselves? ... that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted? ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time? ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores? ... that, despite the invention of the doorbell, knock-knock jokes have yet to be replaced by ding-dong jokes? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall? ... that Albert Einstein's likeness has been used to sell pornography? (Pictured) ... pole dancing was introduced to Egyptian culture by Cleopatra? ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox? ... that Earth, Wind & Fire have produced a multi-season autobiography? ... that [Wiki|wiki formatting]] is perfect]? It never malfunctions'! ... that Wikipedia features DYKs about mosaic floors that were discovered between 1932 and 1939? ... that there is a simple, easy solution to the fact that you cannot understand the foreigners who are sitting next to you? ... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now? ... that Albert Einstein's likeness has been used to sell pornography? (Pictured) ... that The Oldest Trick in the Book was first chronicled in cuneiform by the Ancient Sumerians, who lived on the windswept steppes of Mesopotamia? ... that Calvin and Hobbes was an action-packed buddy comedy series that ran from 1542-1549, featuring philosophers John Calvin and Thomas Hobbes as themselves? ... that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted? ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time? ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores? ... that, despite the invention of the doorbell, knock-knock jokes have yet to be replaced by ding-dong jokes? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall? ... that Albert Einstein's likeness has been used to sell pornography? (Pictured) ... pole dancing was introduced to Egyptian culture by Cleopatra? ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox? ... that Earth, Wind & Fire have produced a multi-season autobiography? ... that [Wiki|wiki formatting]] is perfect]? It never malfunctions'! ... that Wikipedia features DYKs about mosaic floors that were discovered between 1932 and 1939? ... that there is a simple, easy solution to the fact that you cannot understand the foreigners who are sitting next to you? ... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now? ... that Albert Einstein's likeness has been used to sell pornography? (Pictured) ... that The Oldest Trick in the Book was first chronicled in cuneiform by the Ancient Sumerians, who lived on the windswept steppes of Mesopotamia? ... that Calvin and Hobbes was an action-packed buddy comedy series that ran from 1542-1549, featuring philosophers John Calvin and Thomas Hobbes as themselves? ... that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted? ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time? ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores? ... that, despite the invention of the doorbell, knock-knock jokes have yet to be replaced by ding-dong jokes? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall? ... that Albert Einstein's likeness has been used to sell pornography? (Pictured) ... pole dancing was introduced to Egyptian culture by Cleopatra? ... that there is a pipe bomb placed in your mailbox? ... that Earth, Wind & Fire have produced a multi-season autobiography? ... that [Wiki|wiki formatting]] is perfect]? It never malfunctions'! ... that Wikipedia features DYKs about mosaic floors that were discovered between 1932 and 1939? ... that there is a simple, easy solution to the fact that you cannot understand the foreigners who are sitting next to you? ... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now? ... that Albert Einstein's likeness has been used to sell pornography? (Pictured) ... that The Oldest Trick in the Book was first chronicled in cuneiform by the Ancient Sumerians, who lived on the windswept steppes of Mesopotamia? ... that Calvin and Hobbes was an action-packed buddy comedy series that ran from 1542-1549, featuring philosophers John Calvin and Thomas Hobbes as themselves? ... that Heaven has met its quota, and your dead granny has just been waitlisted? ... that the Red Baron, in addition to being the deadliest ace fighter pilot of World War I, traveled through time? ... that over 30 million Chinese peasants died in the Great Leap Forwards due to inadequate long-jump scores? ... that, despite the invention of the doorbell, knock-knock jokes have yet to be replaced by ding-dong jokes? ... that an umbrella is a magical object that is used in many cultures to discourage rainfall?	In the news Chuck Norris didn't die, Death got Chuck Norris'd. Trump talks to America on Iran, Chuck Norris, the Moon, March Madness, and firing Pam Bondi World shocked as Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks the bucket (Pictured) Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize Iran kept barely alive by Cardboard Ayatollah Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Ongoing: Fallout from the Epstein Files • War Special Combat Operation in Iran • Chucky McGoo's jawline being gradually destroyed • March Madness Final Four Recent deaths: Robert Mueller • Transgender self-identity in India • Mr. Strickland • C.B. Buckner's carreer as an MLB ump • Duke's basketball season • Jesus Upcoming deaths: Mahmoud Ahmadinejad • Atlanta Falcons • Streetsigns with Cesar Chavez's name • Sora • Tiger Woods' driver's license and career.. fuck it, his life can go too • Holostars JP On this day... April 4: National No Spamming Day (Iraq) 3141 BC - The world's first great pi was baked. It took $\pi$ years to eat. 1949 - Iceland's blundered declaration of war on the USA leads to the accidental formation of NATO. 1503 - Disneyland Central America opens in the Aztec city of Tenochtitlan. 1975 - You really should have bought shares in Microsoft, which was formed on this day. 1984 - President Ronald Reagan calls for an international ban on something or other, oh hell I can't remember. (Pictured) 2001 - The butterfly effect is proved in an ingenious experiment, causing devastating hurricane damage in China. 2002 - Actor Mickey Rooney begins his process of decomposition.
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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