Babel:ARCL

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Did you know...

*... that sovereign citizens have all the rights of U.S citizens, without having to follow any of the laws?
  • ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?
  • ... that sovereign citizens have all the rights of U.S citizens, without having to follow any of the laws?
  • ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?
  • ... that sovereign citizens have all the rights of U.S citizens, without having to follow any of the laws?
  • ... that less than 10% of the world's cactus population contains gold inside?
  • ... that sovereign citizens have all the rights of U.S citizens, without having to follow any of the laws?

In the news

Biden selects Strong Woman as running mate
"I'm a woman, yes. I'm strong. I'm Strong Woman."

On this day...

August 11: Sexual Harassment In The Workplace Day
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  • 1492 - Alexander VI is elected Pope. He becomes known for making lewd and improper suggestions to the cardinals.
  • 1858 - The First ascent of the Eiger. After this ascent, an Eiger Counter keeps track.
  • 1966 - John Lennon holds a press conference apologizing for stating that the Beatles were "more popular than Jesus." He clarifies, "I meant to say we were more popular than Mohammed."
  • 1969 - The first men land on the moon. While collecting moon rocks, Neil Armstrong "accidentally" rubs up against Buzz Aldrin.
  • 1972 - The last United States ground combat unit departs South Vietnam. Says an Army spokesman, "Thank goodness we've learned our lesson! No more pointless guerilla wars without an exit strategy for us!"
  • 1993 - President Bill Clinton takes interest in the new White House secretary.
  • 2004 - Bill O'Reilly makes several drunken phone calls. He later wakes up to discover that he is the now the Democratic Representative for New Hampshire, and president of the international Gay and Lesbian Alliance.
  • 2006 - Harry Whittington declines to play naked Twister with Dick Cheney. Instead, the two embark on a quail hunt where Dick shoots Harry, claiming it was an accident.

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Pontius Pilot
The Pontius Pilot is infamous for some functionality issues. One typical complaint is that the Microsoft Crucifixion program often crucified incorrect and important data, such as the Messiah. Thankfully for its users, the file would miraculously reappear two days later after descending to the Recycle Bin, not three as some mathematically illiterate biblical scholars would tell you.

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Writer and Noob of the Month

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


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