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As it happens, a Main Page is a page of primarity, popularity and urination-arity Today's featured paragraph Recently featured: Foreign accent syndrome CaseOh Conspiracy Theory Generator Why?:Is there a monkey in my fridge? Archive – Vote for featured articles You know you're WTF when... Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 397,341 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 397,341 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 397,341 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 397,341 total flamewars purged. Advertising Sign in kumquat Uncyc | Images | Forum | Users | UnMail   Advanced search Over 397,341 total flamewars purged. Advertising Did you know... ... that Margaret Thatcher (Pictured) died thirty years too late? ... that there is one imposter among us? ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)? ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win? ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven? ... that playing Dungeons & Dragons has caused many teenagers to loose their grip on reality? (Pictured) ...Funkytown was a Scientology commune in the 60s? ... that nobody can describe what a simile is like? ... that existing is highly dangerous, and should not be performed unless you are competent enough to understand how to perform it? ... there's a ninja behind you but it left when you turned around? ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand? ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? ... that your car is rolling down the driveway right now? ... that Margaret Thatcher (Pictured) died thirty years too late? ... that there is one imposter among us? ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)? ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win? ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven? ... that playing Dungeons & Dragons has caused many teenagers to loose their grip on reality? (Pictured) ...Funkytown was a Scientology commune in the 60s? ... that nobody can describe what a simile is like? ... that existing is highly dangerous, and should not be performed unless you are competent enough to understand how to perform it? ... there's a ninja behind you but it left when you turned around? ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand? ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? ... that your car is rolling down the driveway right now? ... that Margaret Thatcher (Pictured) died thirty years too late? ... that there is one imposter among us? ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)? ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win? ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven? ... that playing Dungeons & Dragons has caused many teenagers to loose their grip on reality? (Pictured) ...Funkytown was a Scientology commune in the 60s? ... that nobody can describe what a simile is like? ... that existing is highly dangerous, and should not be performed unless you are competent enough to understand how to perform it? ... there's a ninja behind you but it left when you turned around? ... that the handgun is one of the most pitiful guns you can find, seeing as it's part of your hand? ... that abstinence is only 99.999% effective? ... that your car is rolling down the driveway right now? ... that Margaret Thatcher (Pictured) died thirty years too late? ... that there is one imposter among us? ... that Elon Musk plots to monetarily obtain Madagascar for the industrialization of Tesla manufacturing plants, alongside having it renamed "Mada-electric-car"? ... Nautical knots are not knots that can be knotted into knots (most likely not)? ... that rounding up sheep is easiest to the nearest ten? ... that sufficiently advanced magic is indistinguishable from science? ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win? ... that Jesus loves you, but that's probably not enough to get to heaven?	In the news Trump launches war with Iran, is given another Peace Prize (Pictured) Team USA sweeps Canada in Olympic hockey; Trump renews "51st state" banter Want to know the next big investment? CLICK HERE! (this article is not sponsored by A.I.) The Andrew Formerly Known as Prince BUSTED FOR EPSTEIN CONNECTIONS! US Department of Health declares we should all become junk food eaters So.. about that Super Bowl.. Bad Bunny and TPUSA offer equally heathen, equally crappy halftime shows GEQBUS SAM DARNOLD HAS WON AN ACTUAL SUPER BOWL! VERY NICE! Take that, Josh Allen and Lamar Jackson! Uncyclopedia servers shit themselves for two days straight Tomodachi Life sequel to be released in April Donald Trump still really, really wants Greenland Alaska to pay for damages to Exxon Valdez Ongoing: Nanny state officials breaching people's privacy rights via enforcing social media bans and digital ID under the pretext of "think of the children!" • Fallout from the Epstein Files • r/TheDarnold still having a massive field day • NFL fans experiencing withdrawal symptoms with the season now over • Team Canada rethinking life Recent deaths: Brad Arnold • NFL season • Winter Olympics • Some kid from some movie you probably forgot existed, but had a funny title • James Van Der Beek (Not Dick Van Dyke, Ashley Roberts from the Pussycat Dolls!) • Robert Duvall • Kurt Van Dyke (not Dick) • Jesse Jackson • YouTube • Tom Noonan • Eric Dane • Melania Trump's big movie star career • Team Canada hockey, twice, AND their curling team • Some Nerd named Robert Carradine • Warner Bros. bidding war • Neil Sedaka • M-m-m-Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad and other Iranian leaders Not dead: Dick Van Dyke, who's 100, bitches!! (Not to be confused with James Van Der Beek) • Quinton Reviews • Mahmoud Ahmadinejad (according to Wikipedia) • Avicii (according to Wikipedia) Upcoming deaths: Donald Trump • NYC's economy and snow handling capability • Weed • Dick van Dyke, eventually • Dancin' Maduro • Iran's government • The careers of everyone named in the Epstein Files • the US government, again • A Las Vegas hotel that no one's going to remember • Mexico • Smiling Friends On this day... March 2: International Genderflip Cartoon Characters Day 1797 - The Bank of England issues the country's first currency to feature a smug, grinning monarch. 1867 - First Reconstruction laws: replaces slavery with "technically-not-slavery", which is not slavery. Technically. 1917 - The people of Puerto Rico are granted U.S. citizenship, to make the colonial exploitation that much more painful. 1946 - President Ho Chi Minh is declared "most likely to ferment Communist insurrection" in high school yearbook. 1961 - John F. Kennedy starts the Peace Corps, a secret CIA project to dump potentially troubling bleeding-heart hippies abroad. 1995 - Yahoo! is created, Nintendo immediately sues the site for stealing Mario's orgasm sound. 2017 - Scientists discover a side-effect of watching Guy Fieri (Pictured) marathons on the Food Network: severe internal bleeding.
Featured picture It is evident that the car has come a long way since its original cardboard chassis design. Image credit: Hindleyite View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
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Writer and Noob of the Month Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so. Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage! Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls. Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners

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