User:Ninja Man/main

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Tool are a Californian progressive experimental avante-garde art-rock alternative metal band. They have a high degree of popularity among intelligent people like me who like intelligent music. However, they don't really have much mainstream popularity, because they're too busy pushing the boundaries of music. Most dumbass sheeple can't handle all the polyrhythms and time-signatures and stuff, because it's not all 4/4 and 3-minutes long. They all just listen to the Spice Girls and stuff. Not that Tool care about popularity. They're way too busy pushing the boundaries of music. Tool's main message is that people should think for themselves and question everything they're told. Most people don't do this because they're just sheep. I always think for myself because that's what Maynard told me to do. (Full article...)

Did you know...

*... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now?
  • ...that virgins are actually alien beings with zero sex organs, and reproduce via telekinesis?
  • ... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now?
  • ...that virgins are actually alien beings with zero sex organs, and reproduce via telekinesis?
  • ... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now?
  • ...that virgins are actually alien beings with zero sex organs, and reproduce via telekinesis?
  • ... that you have schizophrenia and we're talking about you right now?

In the news

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"It's for the children's own good!"

Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian InvasionGaza WarTrump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Superman and Super Dog's movie doing surprisingly well • Israel/Iran and Russia/Ukraine "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk)

Recent deaths: Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael MadsenBill Cosby's TV sonBryan Kohberger's freedom • Ozzy OsbourneChuck MangioneHulk HoganResident AlienDown syndromeTom LehrerThe systemFUBAR

Upcoming deaths: DEIPittsburgh Steelers' locker room • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid GameMAGAJoe Biden's credibility • The flowers you bring Alan Bergman • Bryan Kohberger, at the hands of his fellow inmates

On this day...

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August 3: Vague Day:

Featured picture

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A long time ago, in a galaxy, far, far away...

Image credit: Bad Motherfucker
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Recent Articles


More recent articles | Most wanted pages | Requested rewrites | Add to stubs | Lonely pages | Pee Review | Try writing about... | Stuck articles needing a push

Writer and Noob of the Month

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Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!

So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.

Let us all clap for him because I said so.


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Do not pull your pants up just yet. We got a Uncyclopedian of the Month award winner up in here! Give it up for Leverage!


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Since there is no winner for the Noob of the Moment, you are all now noobs. There are a couple of long-running nominations, but they are stuck there, like foetuses in suspended animation, and I fear for their souls.


Vote for Writer of the Month | Vote for Noob of the Moment | Vote for Uncyclopedian of the Month | Past Winners


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