User:The Woodburninator/Archive2
popping your talk page's cherry[edit | edit source]
RAPE. - P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon 
(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 19:07, Sep 25
- Oh Noes. This would be my 2nd raping, and first on uncyc... :).... :( The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 03:45, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
Bad timing![edit | edit source]
I was out of town for three days and missed seeing talk:Sania Mirza on VFH. Thanks for nomming it, though. It's brilliant how my fictional reaction to the original Sania Mirza article, generated an even funnier real reaction of its own. -- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey) 19:39, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
- Yeah, I just happened upon that page. I made a couple of changes to the talk page, but some people weren't too fond of that, so the change back to how it is now kind of killed the nom. Oh well. I would say, if nothing else, it at least adds to your article. I really can't believe people thought it was real. You did an awesome job with that article. Just a shame the talk page couldn't have been highlighted too. The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 20:36, 26 September 2008 (UTC)
UnSignpost: October 2nd, 2008[edit | edit source]
Now Delivered Trendily Late!
October 2nd, 2008 • ALL-KITTEN ISSUE • Your #1 source for Cajek ban jokes!
According to Wikia staff member Sannse, Uncyclopedia's advertising revenue is below expectations and must rename itself to appeal to the younger generation. "I think the problem is that 'Uncyclopedia' has lost its edge," Sannse said to a crowd of squirrels and kittens gathered around the Uncyclo-stables last Saturday, "...all of which is contained in its name." Older users, like Mordillo, the jew who secretly controls "Uncyc," and TheLedBalloon, who is an inanimate balloon, strongly petition for the name to stay the same. The Unsignpost couldn't be bothered to actually read the forum that Sannse created, but we're assuming that everyone's against changing the name to "Asparagus.org" or something. The name change will reflect the personalities and interests of every single contributor. "Yeah, Asparagus.org is gonna have to do until we figure out what would be a good name," Sannse yelled at a local gathering of squirrels in Uncyclopedia's break room. Many users have complained about the change, but not AsparagusSignPost, which has run into a little trouble with the law recently, and doesn't want to go back to jail by disobeying "the man" or causing "drama". Because, as we ALL know, some head writers have been banned a whole bunch of times for being "different". So to Asparagus.org we say: "Keep the funnies coming, unless someone is forecasting your doom again..."
 For the first time in over two weeks, the flaming death of this silly wiki has been predicted in some form. Last time it was that stain that looked puzzlingly like Jimbo Wales, the time before it was that bird that flew overhead. You know the one I mean. This time around, undead user Necropaxx has pointed out several recent disturbing trends that seem to mean only one thing: Uncyc is about to suffer its death throes. It seems this time that the demise of the wiki will also utterly destroy the souls of every one of the dozens of users who contribute here regularly. Tidings such as this have frightened new users such as September NotM Multiliteralist, who had his to say: "Oh no." Several of the signs that Uncyclopedia is doomed are unarguably true: VFP is stagnant due to the lack of Zombiebaron activity. The Pee Review queue is backed up worse than a public toilet after Cinco de Mayo. Modusoperandi seems to be malfunctioning, as he has dispensed with his usual biting wit in favor of just plain biting. It appears, in at least a few users' eyes, that Uncyc has "jumped the kitten". Lack of News Wreaks Havoc on UnSignpost In an unprecedented press conference earlier this week, UnSignpost editor-in-chief Mr. Gerry Cheevers (the user, not the hockey player) admitted that "This week's issue is actually still a blank template", further stating "I've been swamped at work, and today developed cold-like symptoms." However, some experts disagree on the cause of an UnSignpost devoid of news. "There is an obvious explanation for the lack of gratifying news stories in the USP this week," said Mr. News Guy, the world-renowned news reporter, kitten enthusiast, and unicycle-fetish expert. "There is just no news to report on," he continued, to which the reporter we borrowed from UnNews responded "And what's causing this lack of news?" "That's just it! There's no news to report on!" "So... you're saying is, the reason there's no news is because there's no news?" "Exactly! And it's just a matter of time until some attention whore writes a stupid and redundant story on the fact that there's no news!" This story is dedicated to the memory of Mr. News Guy, whose body was recovered from the Los Angeles river the next day. |
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-- REGRETTENENBAUMIS DEAD TALK! 23:50, 3 October 2008 (UTC)
So dude...[edit | edit source]
What's up dude? I see you removed the conera seering redness, that's good. SK Sir Orian57Talk 
RotM 22:21 8 October 2008
- I think the searing red was pretty awesome, but I grew tired of it, as one does with a $3 whore. But I digress. What, indeed, is up, as you put it, in my life? Mainly college, and it is rather boorish, and inconsequential as I see it. But, alas, I must sully myself to its whims if I am to advance to a place in my life, where I can make decent wages. Also, I made this awesome new article Forest Whitaker's Lazy Eye, but it got deleted for some reason.... But I showed the powers that be, and re-created it in my userspace. Take that community! That'll show you to lift your nose at my excellent writing talents. Haha! Hahahahaha! But, how are your lives my friend?
Still staying true to yourself?Still working for the man? The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 13:56, 9 October 2008 (UTC)- Still? I've never had a job I have applied for one though and am waiting to hear about it and there's another part time one that I probably should go for. And I have a few night classes. And I wrote this which RT thinks is pants and in all honesty I can see it's not my best I'm also writing this Which RT thinks is great so far and I'm inclined to agree. Oh and I've just figured out what you actualy meant by working for the man: you think I'm a rent boy. That's still true but in lue of the fact I'm a virgin buisness isn't very good. Oh and don't be mean about three dollar whores. Have you ever had one? I have; we talked for hours! Best $3 I ever spent. Oh and in my personal opinon you article lacks prettyness some may say wankability see here for further advice. SK Sir Orian57Talk
RotM 14:16 9 October 2008
- Still? I've never had a job I have applied for one though and am waiting to hear about it and there's another part time one that I probably should go for. And I have a few night classes. And I wrote this which RT thinks is pants and in all honesty I can see it's not my best I'm also writing this Which RT thinks is great so far and I'm inclined to agree. Oh and I've just figured out what you actualy meant by working for the man: you think I'm a rent boy. That's still true but in lue of the fact I'm a virgin buisness isn't very good. Oh and don't be mean about three dollar whores. Have you ever had one? I have; we talked for hours! Best $3 I ever spent. Oh and in my personal opinon you article lacks prettyness some may say wankability see here for further advice. SK Sir Orian57Talk
UnSignpost: October 10th 2008[edit | edit source]
Good things come to those who wait. So does the UnSignpost.
October 9th, 2008 • Twenty-First Issue • Bursting with Crunchy Goodness!
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Uncyclopedia Stock Plummets  Uncyclopedia stockholders are in a state of panic after shares of Uncyclomedia fell over 60% this week amid fears of a writing recession. "I just can't gamble on a rebound," said one investor as he carefully climbed out onto his window ledge overlooking Wall Street, perhaps seeking some fresh air. "With the current economic and comedic climate, and rumors of the destruction of the website, it looks like Uncyc Incorporated is about to fold." Other investors are slightly more optimistic. We ran into a smartly dressed woman in the Uncyc break room and were intrigued as to why a female would ever have enough confidence in the wiki to invest the large sum of one dollar bills she was counting. It turned out that she was a stripper, but we did eventually find someone who still had faith in the company. "There's so much more to the Uncyclopedia Empire than just the humor wiki," said confident money-man Chet Hardluck. "There's the kitten factory, the escort service, the games & sports division...and don't forget the world's largest boron-smelting plant!" When it was pointed out that these claims are in fact bollocks (except for the boron plant), Hardluck joined the queue of businessmen waiting their turn to get some frsh air on the suddenly popular ledge. The fate of the Uncyclopedia corporation remained unclear at press time. Some say that if Uncyc stock plummets through enough negative numbers, the stock will reset itself at zero, resulting in huge negative negative profits for those who bought the stock whilst it was negative. Uncyclopedia announces invasion of YouTube The first upload began a series of incursions onto YouTube by all types of Uncyclopedians. Some made sense, such as article narrations and UnTunes. Some were questionable, such as the gangsta rap video by the usually timid Sycamore. But nearly 99% of all material in the 'Uncyclopedia' category is patent nonsense, such as a visualization of AAAAAAA!, faceoffs between George Bush & Kanye West and Steve Ballmer & various other injokes, and a 'don't blink contest' featuring Gert5 staring into a camera for nine hours. |
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— Sir Sycamore (talk) 19:01, 10 October 2008 (UTC)
Action required[edit | edit source]
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For the glory of her majesty is this week's Colonization. Your Uncyclopedia needs you!! You asked for it and now For the glory of her majesty is to be transformed by our band of rewriting brothers. It is your duty as an Uncyclopedian to join the invading army, go forth and spread the funny word. Good luck, my friend. |
-- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey) 11:19, 20 October 2008 (UTC)
UnSignpost: 21 October 2008[edit | edit source]
The Free Newspaper Only Two People Started Out Editing, But Now They Want Nothing To Do With!
October 16th, 2008 • Twenty-Second Issue • Now with 40% more Batman!
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Uncyc Users throw Support Behind Joe Plumber  Uncyclopedians today officially declared their undying allegience to Joe Plumber, a newcomer in the upcoming U.S. presidential election. Plumber was thrust into the spotlight last night at the second of many dreadfully boring presidential debates between those two or more candidates currently jockeying for the office. His name was mentioned no less than twenty-four dozen times by the candidates, with each claiming that Joe sided with him on issues such as healthcare, tax increases, and the 'Canada Problem'. One candidate even went so far as to claim that he and Plumber were 'buddies', and that Plumber installed a new bathtub in his palatial presidential candidate mansion last July. Several prominent Uncyclopedians spoke out in vehement support of Plumber, citing his many qualifications to be the leader of the free world. "He's a maverick in the plumbing industry," said staunch pro-Plumberer Colin "All your base" Heaney. "He also has a plan to live the American Dream, through the infinite wisdom of buying his own plumbing company. America needs dreamers, Gerry." Despite being asked to stop commenting, Heaney went on to say that Plumber "cleans people's pipes on a regular basis." Other supporters of Joe Plumber's campaign and platform included inanimate objects such as TheLedBalloon. "The most important thing to know about Joe Plumber is that he is AMERICAN, in bold italics underlined and all caps, just like that." When asked to give another example of how patriotic both he and Plumber are, Mr. Balloon replied, "Just picture him standing in front of a flag with the Star Spangled Banner playing in the background, and you'll know why I support his presidency." Current polls show Plumber trailing in the presidential race, with an estimated zero percent of all voters. His backers are trying to spread the word about Joe's tax relief plan, his rugged good looks, and his skill with a pair of slip-nose pliers. Uncylopedia Issues Food Stamps Due to the recent downturn in the economy, Uncyclopedia officials have issued hundreds of food stamps to users who have no means of feeding themselves. These users might be out of a job or have no arms. In any case, these food stamps are to be given out on alternate Thursdays, except for odd-numbered months, months ending in 'y' or 'r', and April. They will be available at the Uncyclopedia Meat Depot, the boron smelting plant, or by calling the new food stamps hotline. These food stamps will be valid for purchasing a wide variety of nutritious and delicious items from the Uncyclopedia Farmer's Market and Livestock Emporium. Included are items such as pre-packed huffable kittens, gummi grues, and AAAAAAA! cookies.
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--Sycamore (Talk) 10:12, 21 October 2008 (UTC)
UnSignpost: 3-ish November 2008[edit | edit source]
Now Delivered Trendily Late!
November 3rd-ish, 2008 • Twenty-Third Issue • Better than things that aren't as good!
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Address Change: Return To Sender? If you are one of those people, here's a brief summary of the incident:
If you aren't one of those people, here's an even briefer summary:
More on this ongoing situation as we get it. Probably. Glorious return to form for MrN! Fellow poopsmith and genial man-about-town UU said of the momentous occasion: "you what? MrN? Oh yeah, him. Good bloke. Knows his underwear". Then he scratched his nose reflectively and wandered off. MrN himself was unavailable for comment at the time of going to press/we couldn't be bothered to interview him (delete as you think applicable), but the UnSignpost fondly imagines he would have smiled enigmatically, raised an eyebrow quizzically, nodded appreciatively, and said "PANTS!" predictably. The pants themselves were also unavailable for comment. |
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Shoved through the letterbox for the one and only time by UU - natter 
11:56, Nov 6
UnSignpost: 13th November 2008[edit | edit source]
The Self-Proclaimed Greatest Periodical Of All Time!
November 13th, 2008 • Issue 24 • So close to journalism you'll be hard pushed to know the difference!
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Uncyclopedian does something vaguely noteworthy in "real life" Mickey has so far failed to live up to Uncyclopedia's proudest traditions, by actually being quite good at the game. Indeed, at the time of writing, he'd won several games, including what he modestly described as "an awesome numbers game, beating Carol". He also shamelessly mentioned his connection to the site in a recent episode, leading to quite literally no extra edits to the Countdown article - still, thanks for the plug, Mick! Having spent time in the company of such notable international icons as Des O'Connor (no, we don't have a page on him, so there's no link), Paul Zenon (nope, nothing on him either) and Suzy Dent (spotting a pattern here, non-UK readers?) Mickey is now Uncyclopedia's most prominent celebrity, and it's surely only a matter of time before he appears on Strictly Come Dancing or Celebrity Big Brother, and has a lurid kiss-and-tell exposé in Heat Magazine. Various "...of the month" award candidates - November's in-depth analysis Uncyclopedian of the Month: Controversial nominees abound here, as serial ban collector Cajek goes head-to-head with Wikia corporate mouthpiece Sannse. The hyperactive one with the light blue sig is in the lead at present. But! As with certain other popular recent votes, there is a third candidate inexplicably attracting little attention - Dexter111344, a site maintenance and VFD stalwart. Who will win? Only you can decide (and all the other people who vote, obviously). Noob of the Month: No-one. Yet. Find a noob doing something vaguely decent and nominate them please! Otherwise the UnSignpost may just have to bring back the ultimate dead horse for yet more flogging and nom Rcmurphy again. Useless Gobshite of the Month: Kip the Dip is out on his own for this one so far. Having proved an exemplary gobshite for months on end, despite being cruelly denied the recognition of this award, the UnSignpost feels that his time is now, and is abandoning all pretence at unbiased journalism: VOTE KIP FOR UGotM! |
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MrN9001 12:57, 13 November 2008 (UTC)
UnSignpost: 20th November2008[edit | edit source]
The Newspaper With No Ambitions, Goals, Hopes or Dreams!
November 20th, 2008 • #100/4 • Sucking Journalism's Fat Wang. Badly.
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UnSignpost Stumbles past 6 month milestone In true UnSignpost fashion, the editors noticed this about 2 weeks late - the Signpost having been so gloriously conceived (and never was a word more aptly suited to this juvenile-as-all-get-out publication) by Dr. Skullthumper and Cajek back in early May. The first issue rolled off the presses on May 8th, bringing you such earth-shattering news as "Rcmurphy nommed for Noob of the Month again" and "Uncyclopedia F**king Doomed", as well as establishing Signpost tradition with "Spacefiller of the week" (something about Grand Theft Auto). The editor's office here at USP should probably have had a revolving door installed, having been occupied at various times since Cajek and Skull abandoned it by THEDUDEMAN, Gerrycheevers, Heerenveen and some other numpty - although this is small change compared to the number of delivery bots and boys that have thrust the latest issue, still warm, through your letter flaps. Over the months, many other contributors have helped to keep the UnSignpost in its deserved position of "only weekly-ish newspaper on the wiki" - possibly by being so lame that no-one wanted to bother doing another one. And, having brought you such shattering exclusives as "Wookiepedia Too Cool For Cajek", "Porn Wars End in Sticky Truce" and "RC takes home NotM", the UnSignpost shows no sign of speeding up. Maybe one day, the unstoppable forces of apathy will finally overcome those who still labour under the impression that people actually care about seeing block log entries and biopics arrive on their talk page weekly, and the UnSignpost will grind to a halt. But until then, it will continue to bring you all the old news you've already seen somewhere else, whether you like it or not! UnSportsPost
In response to quite literally some demand, your ever-topical, finger-on-the-pulse UnSignpost brings you all the latest sports news that's unfit to print!
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MrN9001 20:55, 20 November 2008 (UTC)
UnSignpost: 27th November2008[edit | edit source]
The Self-Proclaimed Greatest Periodical Of All Time!
November 27th • Issue 26 • The newspaper it's tough to swat flies with
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Uncyc shall go to the Ball! To whet the appetite, let's take a look at some of the cream of last year's competition:
Yup, standards are that high, or low, depending on your point of view, sense of humour, religion, shoe size and taste in hats. So jump to it! If you can make the judges laugh even as they vomit up their own entrails, you could be in with a chance of winning the glorious title "Aristocrat en Regalia", as well as the undying jealousy of the other entrants you so satisfyingly routed. Or you might lose. Asked for quotes, organiser RAHB quipped "I'll probably get on it sometime tonight, if not tomorrow", while official judging type Modusoperandi added "my memoires are riddled with mind expanding shit". {{username}} claims millionth victim "It was there, in front of me, an accusation that I was teh gheyz", the hapless victim told us exclusively. "Such hard-hitting slander had to be addressed, and addressed immediately, so I clicked the edit button, and launched into a passionate and vitriolic defence of my unquestionable heterosexuality post-haste!" Ironically, it was the length of this diatribe that finally revealed the subterfuge. "It took me some time to compose a suitable riposte, listing at length my many dalliances with members of the opposite sex, my subscription to Playboy and my utter distaste for the movie Brokeback Mountain - in fact it took so long that I was logged out from my account" said the sap. "So when I hit the preview button to behold my comeback in all its savage majesty, what should catch my eye but the <insert name here> message that betrays {{username}} abuse? I felt so embarrassed, the only logical course of action I could take was to sell my story to a newspaper with a global readership - you did say you'd pay me for this, right?" Shortly after this point, the interview was discontinued due to a disagreement between interviewer and interviewee. Asked for a final quote, we were told "fuck {{username}}, and fuck you too!" - a comment that speaks volumes about the suffering this terrible template is capable of inflicting on the unwary. {{username}} was unavailable for comment, and remains at large, ready to strike again. |
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MrN9001 21:15, 27 November 2008 (UTC)
UnSignpost: 4th December 2008 (yea, we know it's late)[edit | edit source]
Now with 20% more ninjas!
December 4th • Issue 27 • Smiting the nail of news with the plastic hammer of truth
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Sycamore: How does he do it? An UnSignpost Special Investigation  But who is this masked Celt? Well, since changing identity from MMACKNIGHT in March 2008, he's racked up an impressive 18,000 edits (or he will have by the time this paper is actually delivered - it's hanging at 17.940-odd at the time of typing). Many of these edits have been thanklessly categorising pages, voting for deletion, reverting and ban patrolling - the kind of soul-crushing work, in other words, that would sap the will to live of the average individual, but not our Syc. His efforts have not gone un-noticed. Indeed, he's been re-nommed for Uncuclopedian of the Month, even though he's already won the award. And despite the understandable reluctance of the non-existent cabal to swell their non-existent ranks, there is a small but significant groundswell of opinion gathering that this should be followed by the bestowing of a Banhammer on the cheery Caledonian. All of this is interesting, of course, and handily fills up column inches in this week's issue, but it doesn't answer the burning question: how does he do it?  Warning: Your safety-conscious UnSignpost would like to point out that Irn Bru is only known to have this beneficial effect on Scots. Those from less tartan countries would be advised to steer well clear - don't try this at home, kids! From the Cabal's desk  |
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MrN9001 19:13, 5 December 2008 (UTC)
UnSignpost: 11th December[edit | edit source]
May contain traces of humor!
December 11th • Issue 28 • The truth, the whole truth, and nothing
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Colin breaks #uncyclopedia
At approximately 7:01 EST, Colin "All your base" Heaney officially fucked everything up yet again. IRC was engaged in what started out as a naturally occurring, all-caps LOL train. However, being the little faggot that he is, Colin decided to join in, effectively making it not funny anymore. This reporter, being an expert witness in cases of dipshittery, quickly came to the conclusion that "Colin makes everything suck." However, Uncyclopedia's resident shitstain did not stop there. He proceeded to incite bizarre and violent urges within members of IRC, causing them to commit unspeakable acts. This reporter, under Colin's influence, killed both of his parents; deadpidgeon and MrN9000 both became homosexuals as a result. Colin himself was then found to have been responsible for every case of unpleasantness throughout history: the Holocaust, 9/11, and abortion. As other users unknowingly joined the channel-turned-warzone, they too fell victim to Colin's faggotry. Users were eventually transforming into furries and fucking each other with "furry Disney dicks" just before this reporter relocated to a safer distance. Needless to say, there is now sufficient evidence that everything stupid and gay and unfunny is, in fact, Colin's fault. Chicks, man. Hot Chicks. Just the words start your heart racing and your mumble mumble. Hot chicks have long failed to receive the ample, under-wire support they deserve here on Uncyc, and if it were not for one, soft-drink based, visionary noob, the femmes fatales of Uncyc would still be a saggy, wrinkly mess. Now all the babes, sexy ladies, foxy chicks, MILFs, and, yes, even magical anime girls, rest in the palm of your hand, throbbing with their new-found intellectual networking - WikiProject Hot Chicks. When asked how the aforementioned n00b came up with such a brilliant idea, he responded: "I don't know what UnSignpost is, my motivation for starting U[N]:WP Hot Chicks was because I thought it was rather humorous, I would like to be adopted, and in Soviet Russia, all your base are belong to YOU !!" (Doctapeppaman was promptly given a stern spanking for such irresponsible use of memes). The project has already succeeded in tagging several sexy talk-pages with the WikiProject Hot Chicks seal, thereby rating them on a random and baseless scale from A- to D-Cup, and the project will most likely be a success, considering the high ratio of users to perverts present on the site. Perhaps, one day, the project will achieve its primary goal - making every article without enough pictures of scantily-clad women into an article about cheesecake. |
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MrN9001 21:18, 11 December 2008 (UTC)
Thanks[edit | edit source]
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Sycamore has awarded you a cookie! Now go play in traffic. |
For looking after my stuff while on a bit of a Christmas break:)--Sycamore (Talk) 12:31, 20 December 2008 (UTC)
- A whole cookie!!! h00ray! Let's go celebrate with that traffic over there! The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 18:19, 20 December 2008 (UTC)
Happy Hanukkah[edit | edit source]
if you're not Jewish, party anyway
Happy Hanukkah from Rabbi Techno
NOW START DRINKING
Seasons Greetings[edit | edit source]
Keep the "X" in X-mas Santa checks his list to see who's been naughty and who's been nice. And naughty always makes out better at X-mas |
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Dame 
GUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 18:38, 21 December 2008 (UTC)
A FESTIVUS FOR THE RESTOFUS![edit | edit source]
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Happy Festivus, from The Led Balloon and Jerry Stiller. Put up your Festivus Pole, air your grievances, and prepare for the feats of strength, for festivus cannot continue until I am pinned! Oh, and merry Christmas if you're into that sort of thing. |
| It's a Festivus miracle! |
- P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon (Tick Tock) (Contribs) 20:30, Dec 21
Happy Holidays from all of us at SysRq Waste Disposal and Grinder Co.[edit | edit source]
Tis' The Season[edit | edit source]
Io, Saturnalia!- Eat, Drink and treat your masters with disrespect!
Happy Hedonism from the Saturnalicius Princeps
NOW START DRINKING JAGERMEISTER WHILE WEARING UGLY SWEATERS AND SILLY HATS
Thanks for your support!
Here's Your Christmas Tree[edit | edit source]
----Pleb- Sawblade5 [coolest link ever] ( yell | FAQ | I did this ) 08:43, 25 December 2008 (UTC)
XC, muhhfugga[edit | edit source]
So today whilst stalking your userpage I saw that you had Cross Country on your rewrite list, and I thought to myself "hell, I run xc, why not see if I can't wrangle me up a collab" and then I pooted and then I came to your house but you weren't there so I came back to my house and got on the internet and maed a yuky doody and then I went to your talk page. The end. —Sir SysRq (talk) 16:12, 30 December 2008 (UTC)
- Actually I had remembered that you ran as well, and was probably going to ask you if I ever got around to it, which is to say, it's probably good that you got to me. Although, a couple days after I put that under my rewrite list on my page, this happened. Looks like we might have to break that one guy's heart if we rewrite this. The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 16:45, 30 December 2008 (UTC)
- It's a challenge. We're gonna have to just suck it up and write something better. =] Alright, so there's a very "behind the scenes" way that I do things. Do you have Skype? It'd be much easier to come up with ideas there. Either way, I'm going to compile an outline for this article on Google Docs; if you want to see an example of how I do an outline then I'll be happy to show you one. But an article like this definitely needs a gameplan. I think we can do it, buddy. —Sir SysRq (talk) 17:04, 30 December 2008 (UTC)
- Hmmm...gameplan, yes. I usually just choose a topic and rant about it until I pass out, but your way seems pretty good too. I am at work right now, which means I can edit freely on the site (not including IRC), but can't really do much else in terms of contacting you. Problem is for about a week or so work may be the only place I have free time to edit. So, I'm fine with you planning this one out, or at least putting together something for me to look at and
destroysee where I can help. Or we could just put this one on hold for a week, either one. The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 17:15, 30 December 2008 (UTC)- Yessir. I'll type something up and have it on your desk by the end of the day. Also, can I have tomorrow off? You see, it's
ChristmasNew Year's, sir! What of Tiny Tim and his tiny crutch? (I knew naming my son "Tiny Tim" was setting him up for all sorts of misfortunes, but my wife insisted on naming the child after her cat...) —Sir SysRq (talk) 17:21, 30 December 2008 (UTC)- No. You work New Year's Mr. Rq. And don't you worry about your precious Tiny Tim. I'll have him play with my darling Big Bertha, who was set up for nothing but excellence. Massive, massive excellence. The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 17:26, 30 December 2008 (UTC)
- Yessir. I'll type something up and have it on your desk by the end of the day. Also, can I have tomorrow off? You see, it's
- Hmmm...gameplan, yes. I usually just choose a topic and rant about it until I pass out, but your way seems pretty good too. I am at work right now, which means I can edit freely on the site (not including IRC), but can't really do much else in terms of contacting you. Problem is for about a week or so work may be the only place I have free time to edit. So, I'm fine with you planning this one out, or at least putting together something for me to look at and
- It's a challenge. We're gonna have to just suck it up and write something better. =] Alright, so there's a very "behind the scenes" way that I do things. Do you have Skype? It'd be much easier to come up with ideas there. Either way, I'm going to compile an outline for this article on Google Docs; if you want to see an example of how I do an outline then I'll be happy to show you one. But an article like this definitely needs a gameplan. I think we can do it, buddy. —Sir SysRq (talk) 17:04, 30 December 2008 (UTC)
Bore da[edit | edit source]
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Alright, boyo? You voted for an article about me. This means that you're entitled to a free slice of laver pizza from Lloydios, the greatest pizzeria in all of Caernarfon. |
IronLung 03:21, 2 January 2009 (UTC)
With Great Appreciation[edit | edit source]
As a Commander of the Order I shall uphold the sacred duty to be funny, not just stupid and to make Codeine's Mum proud.
As NOTM for December 08' I am deeply humbled
I APPRECIATE YOUR VOTE AND SHALL UPHOLD MY RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE YOU LOOK LIKE A TOTAL GENIUS FOR CHOOSING MY CARNIVAL FREAK SHOW
-- 13:49, 2 January 2009 (UTC)
UnSignpost 1st January 2009[edit | edit source]
Now with 20% more ninjas!
January 1st, 2009 • Issue 29 • The first newspaper to wish you a Happy Christmas 2009!
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The UnSignpost starts 2009 as it ended 2008: Late Several readers were probably available for comment, but we didn't ask them anything and blatantly made one up: "it wouldn't be the UnSignpost if it arrived on time", Orian57 might have said, if we'd asked him. The Patronising New Year EditorialTM From this we can infer that Andy Dufresne in The Shawshank Redemption didn't have a clue what he was on about - hope is a ridiculous thing, and should be crushed as soon as possible. However, there is still the possibility, however remote, that something good might happen. Active users might start writing more good articles again. VFH might start to flow like it used to. Old users may return, invigorated, to bestow upon us fresh fruits of their imaginations. New users may arrive to take up the baton, and stride boldly forward, blessing us with a wealth of new articles that inject fresh purpose and impetus to the site. Don't look like that - it might happen. Well, monkeys might also fly out of your butt. Depends if teleportation technology ever becomes viable, widely available, and small enough to secure in such a narrow location. Face it, we haven't a clue what this year holds for us yet, folks, all we can do is try and make it the best we can by writing more articles, and helping new users out, and see where we go from there. This is your UnSignpost, patronising the fuck out of you. Happy New Year! Kevin Rudd says Uncyclopedia is the worst |
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| UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox | |||||||
MrN9001 01:06, 3 January 2009 (UTC)
Mint Jelly[edit | edit source]
I was thinking it might be an idea to move it to a subpage of this, I just thought up a really good idea for an article, but now I can't remember it. - it'll keep it awya from ICU etc and make sure it stays part of the joke. Are you alright with that?:) — Sir Sycamore (talk) 17:24, 6 January 2009 (UTC)
- Hmmmm...well definitely thank you for coming to me first. Are you that against keeping it in mainspace? I like where it is, and that people can perhaps randomly come upon it, and not get it at first, but then see the one link on the page, and figure it out. The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 17:50, 6 January 2009 (UTC)
- So, what was the final verdict? The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 18:26, 6 January 2009 (UTC)
UnSignpost 8th January 09[edit | edit source]
Reading This Is The Mysterious Second Step To Getting Profit From Stealing Childrens' Underwear!
January 8th, 2009 • Issue 30 • Suckling the Milk of News from the Teat of Truth
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Uncyclopedians on Xbox Live
Recently, The following is an actual transcript between me (under the alias "Pope Gustav") and Orian57 (under the alias "Orian57") on Xbox Live.
This is stunning evidence that Orian57, along with others, is leaving the site for the glamorous life of Xbox Live. When confronted with this transcript and these accusations, Orian replied that "I was just on Uncyclopedia today. I was just bored and wanted something else to do." Oddly enough, all of the other Uncyclopedians that have Xbox Live accounts that I spoke to also claimed to have "lives" outside of Uncyclopedia, lives that mainly consist of playing Halo 3. Article gets +21 votes on VFH
Only a few days after going back to featuring "Today's Featured Article" for only one day, instead of the previous two, the article, The defense rests, your honor received 21 "for" votes and no "against" after a mere 3 days on VFH. The article, nominated on VFH by SysRq, and written by noted admin Modusoperandi, is the first article surpass +20 votes in a long while on VFH. Upon hearing of his accomplishment, Modus is heard to have said, "I'd like to thank all of the little people that I crushed to get where I am," and, "Can I wear my Kernel Popcorn costume?" SysRq, the article nominator is quoted as saying, "I was the one who nommed that article; I deserve some recognition." For those of you are new around here, VFH is the process by which uncyclopedia nominates articles for "Today's Featured Article", the article in the top left corner on the mainpage. All users of uncyclopedia, including anonymous ip users are encouraged to vote on VFH and nominate articles on VFH. VFH can be found here, but typing in VFH in the search box, by clicking the "Votes for Highlight" link under the community links on the right (it's second from the bottom between "Pee Review" and "Votes for Pictures"), and Uncyclopedia:VFH, in addition to several other redirects. Many users have expressed approval of this accomplishment, as the more votes an article gets, the better an article is. Therefore, by voting on an article, one injects more quality into an article, in the same way that manufacturers "inspect" quality back into a finished part. Additionally, the admins will not longer be forced to torture various cute animals to inspire users to vote in VFH: provided VFH doesn't stall out again. |
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| UnSignpost Main Page • Contact the Editors • Sign Up for Delivery • Get the Userbox | |||||||
MrN9001 16:11, 9 January 2009 (UTC)
Sania[edit | edit source]
You may have noticed that I've made some changes to the new Sania Mirza article. I just wondered if you'd like to add anything. I'm trying to replicate the structure of the original, with an intro, a list of objections and a conclusion. The original message is to be the basis for the list. That is apart from the "bomb them into the stone age" bit, which I think is perfect for the P.S. at the end. Anyway, if you want to help out with fleshing out the list (I'm not happy with what I've done with the first bullet point) or anything else, be my guest. -- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey) 22:08, 13 January 2009 (UTC)
Thanks![edit | edit source]
For voting Why?:Am I a Power Ranger? into the top ten articles of 2008! Have fun! ~Orian57~ 
~Talk~ 
23:55 1 February 2009
RAAAWR[edit | edit source]
RAAAAAWR.
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Hi[edit | edit source]
I am deeply thankful for your kind words you wrote about me on WOTM. I would like to write an article about you. Is that OK with you? --Docile hippopotamus 08:17, 7 March 2009 (UTC)
- No problem on that. I feel like not enough funny stuff is given credit, so I gave some to you. And is it ok with me? Ahahaha! Of course, but I don't think there is much to write about. I'm not around much as it is. I vote you just keep writing funny stuff. That's all I want. The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 19:18, 15 March 2009 (UTC)
Hey woody![edit | edit source]
Firstly half your page is invisible and secondly I've seen you around a bit recently, have you read my latest work? and also how are you doing? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 22:36 7 March 2009
- Well, I See no problem with my page, so phhh. I blame you for that. And, I've been mostly dicking around a little bit over the past few weeks. Nice to see that you notice this. However, is this some whoring I see from you sir? No I have not read it. Haven't had time to read much of anything recently. Just one or two things. How am I doing? Well, that's an interesting question. My nose is getting back to normal. My strep throat is gone. Got a cold. Just got back from Disney World. So, decent? I don't even know. Past that, Why have we not hung out on Xbox live, and what's up with you? How is GB treating ya? The Woodburninator (woodtalk) (woodstalk) 19:34, 15 March 2009 (UTC)
Test it.[edit | edit source]
Try it. Woody On Fire! 
Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:29, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
Danke schön![edit | edit source]
Thank you for supporting my recently featured article
Your support is greatly appreciated.
—Guildensternenstein
Douche[edit | edit source]
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Hey, you. I have a huge penis. Hey, I guess you want to thank me for allowing you to read something by me. Unfortunately for you, I am currently having sex with your girlfriend. |
--MegaPleb • Dexter111344 • Complain here 00:21, 29 March 2009 (UTC)
For your vote...[edit | edit source]
 The Great Potato Massacre of March 2009 Thank you for supporting Sonje in her ruthless campaign for Potatochopper of the Month A baby potato shall be mercilessly sacrificed in your honour. |
And for the cow comment. --Dame 
22:20, 2 April 2009 (UTC)
Done[edit | edit source]
I've finished writing it. What do you think? Any suggestions? --Docile hippopotamus 02:31, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
- User:Docile hippopotamus/Why?:Be like The Woodburninator (and join his bear army)? --Docile hippopotamus 23:58, 14 April 2009 (UTC)
- Oh, sorry. I saw it a few days ago, but got lost up in real life (totally not as cool) somewhere in the process. Give me a few days here to get past the worst of my homework, and I'll give it a proper viewing, just like ole' gram ma Dickinson. Woody On Fire!
Talking Woody Stalking Woody 08:26, 15 April 2009 (UTC)
- Frankly, I am flattered. One whole article all about me! With that, a critique, if I may... BEARS!? BEARS!? So I guess what you really want is
for me just to accept this and move on.a long-winded back-story about why I have disagreements with bears. Well, you see not 3 years ago, I was a senior in High School. The times, they were afoot. Not that I know what that means, but regardless, that is what they were. It was in English class, when me and one of mybestonly friends were arguing about who would win in a fight: Lions Vs. Bears. Naturally I was on the correct side of lions. We decided to stage the fight on anabandonedextremely full cruise ship, for neutral territory reasons. If the fight were in the Savannah, it wouldn't really be fair now would it? Well, as we were talking during one of my teacher's lectures she asked for us to share our conversation with the class . About an hour and a half later, class ended with the debate still raging. Only thing was kids told their friends about this, and it somehow became a fad in my school. Even the gangstas and rednecks decided to put away their three-century-old fighting to debate the topic amongst themselves. Our school's Valedictorian speech centered mainly around the question. In the end, there was no clear winner, only one clear loser: My English teacher Senior Year. She learned her lesson though, never bugged me and my friend about talking anymore. She just kind of let us go about our business. And that is the story of how I showed a teacher who was the boss.... Where was I now? Lions or bears or something. Not that any of that matters. Thanks for the article, although I'm afraid I may have given you a bad situation. I'm not so sure how much there is to write about me. No fads like RAHB's penis. I'm just some guy. In the words of my people: Siento, Pero muchos gracias por los zapados los biblioteca. Se, es pero tambien....No, wait, I'm Irish. Regardless, Thanks. (and sorry for both how long this message is, and how long it took me to respond. Firstly, I'm bored, and secondly, only a week or so before finals, so I'm a little swamped.) Woody On Fire!Talking Woody Stalking Woody 04:14, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
- I will change it to Lion Army. Can I put some of what you just said in my namespace? So I can add it to the article as a link to winning side ofthe bear vs lion conflict? --Docile hippopotamus 07:20, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
- Dude, do whatever you want. Kick up your feet and enjoy yourself. My words are your words. Not really, but you can take any and all of it. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 19:12, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
- OK. Do you want to say something about yourself and let me quote it for the article under What do people think of The Woodburninator? --Docile hippopotamus 04:18, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
- How about I take a quote from one of my friends. "Yeah, I've read some of that guy's stuff. D+, wouldn't read again." Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 04:27, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
- I added the quote as
“Yeah, I've read some of that guy's stuff. D+, wouldn't read again.”
- The article seems ready for mainspace to me. Is there anything else I should do to it? I will wait until next month to mainspace it because I will add that you won UnBooks author of the month. --Docile hippopotamus 05:18, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
- Looks great. Do whatever you want with it. Thanks again. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 06:29, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
- Looks great. Do whatever you want with it. Thanks again. Woody On Fire!
- I added the quote as
- How about I take a quote from one of my friends. "Yeah, I've read some of that guy's stuff. D+, wouldn't read again." Woody On Fire!
- OK. Do you want to say something about yourself and let me quote it for the article under What do people think of The Woodburninator? --Docile hippopotamus 04:18, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
- Dude, do whatever you want. Kick up your feet and enjoy yourself. My words are your words. Not really, but you can take any and all of it. Woody On Fire!
- I will change it to Lion Army. Can I put some of what you just said in my namespace? So I can add it to the article as a link to winning side ofthe bear vs lion conflict? --Docile hippopotamus 07:20, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
- Frankly, I am flattered. One whole article all about me! With that, a critique, if I may... BEARS!? BEARS!? So I guess what you really want is
- Oh, sorry. I saw it a few days ago, but got lost up in real life (totally not as cool) somewhere in the process. Give me a few days here to get past the worst of my homework, and I'll give it a proper viewing, just like ole' gram ma Dickinson. Woody On Fire!
Template Spam[edit | edit source]
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In Recognition Of The Woodburninator's discerning taste in fine varieties of tea as well as in other matters, Syndrome formally acknowledges that this user is of a good heritage, and would make an excellent potential mate. |
--Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 22:59, 25 April 2009 (UTC)
hey, could you delete User:Joe9320/Pokemon Island for me?There was a HUGE mix-up (It was once a regular page that I moved to a userpage but manually so he starts editing it to his own version.)Anyway, shit put short, it's a clone of my article that needs to be burninated.Care to delete?Thanks.--Bad Shroom 22:26, 6 May 2009 (UTC)
- Unfortunately, I do not have those powers. What I can do is put it on the QVFD page and say it was an author's request. If you need to delete something that you wrote, just do that. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 22:27, 6 May 2009 (UTC)
Weeping with self hatred[edit | edit source]
You said: "Oh man, and then there was this one time I asked Orian "Why have we not hung out on Xbox live, and what's up with you?" and he didn't reply to me. This has nothing to do with anything, it just hurt."
And now I just can't get obver what a knob I am. Please allow me to rectify this mistake. What games do you have? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 00:49 8 May 2009
- Hahaha. I was just trying to stop what looked like it was about to asplode into a whole bunch of drama. Took what I liked from some old talk pages, BUT now that you mention it, I've been busy lately with school, and haven't been playing much at all. BUT(#2) I finished finals yesterday, so I may be playing sometime soon. Don't worry about games, I'll just bug you when you get on. Private chat is a miracle. I can talk to you while we play 2 different games! Magic. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 00:57, 8 May 2009 (UTC)
- Oh yeah I know, me and sissy do that quite a lot, gets confusing when you're each cursing about soemthing different though. :) and yeah I look forward to it. Do you have gears of war 2? Cos I tottaly love that game! ~Orian57~
~Talk~ 
01:10 8 May 2009
- Never played it. Right now it is Halo3 (I'm finally getting to be decent now that people have stopped playing it) and GTA4. I just like jumping out of cars. Just awesome. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 01:15, 8 May 2009 (UTC)
- I've got both of those, never really got into halo though. But GT4 is great fun, never gonna finish the story though because I get distracted far too easily, never played it online though. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 01:17 8 May 2009
- There's a story in that game? Honestly, I generally just run around figuring out worse and worse ways to kill myself. Is it a crap existence? Yes, but it's my existence, so I just do my thing. Now that the summer is upon me though, methinks I should buy some new games. Any suggestions? Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 01:23, 8 May 2009 (UTC)
- Gears of War 2 and Dead Space are certainly the best games I've played ever. so they'd be on my list. Also download Banjo-Kazooie and Banjo-Tooie on the arcade, they're brilliant games. Other than that though, I'm not sure. I've heard good things about Left 4 Dead but haven't played it yet. Hope that helps! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 01:28 8 May 2009
- Fallout3 is fantastic, but it is kind of the opposite of a multiplayer game. Dead Space... I know I've heard of it, but no idea what it is. I'll give it a looksee. Gracias. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 01:36, 8 May 2009 (UTC)
- I noticed you both have XBox Live. My gamertag is AkiraKurosawa4E. Friend me, if you so choose. I likes teh XBox. —Sir Guildensternenstein 21:57, 8 May 2009 (UTC)
- I hate Xbox. OMG And Xbox live is for t3h n00bcakes. lul. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 01:30, 9 May 2009 (UTC)
- But...but...friends.... —Sir Guildensternenstein 15:51, 9 May 2009 (UTC)
- I hate Xbox. OMG And Xbox live is for t3h n00bcakes. lul. Woody On Fire!
- I noticed you both have XBox Live. My gamertag is AkiraKurosawa4E. Friend me, if you so choose. I likes teh XBox. —Sir Guildensternenstein 21:57, 8 May 2009 (UTC)
- Fallout3 is fantastic, but it is kind of the opposite of a multiplayer game. Dead Space... I know I've heard of it, but no idea what it is. I'll give it a looksee. Gracias. Woody On Fire!
- Gears of War 2 and Dead Space are certainly the best games I've played ever. so they'd be on my list. Also download Banjo-Kazooie and Banjo-Tooie on the arcade, they're brilliant games. Other than that though, I'm not sure. I've heard good things about Left 4 Dead but haven't played it yet. Hope that helps! ~Orian57~
- There's a story in that game? Honestly, I generally just run around figuring out worse and worse ways to kill myself. Is it a crap existence? Yes, but it's my existence, so I just do my thing. Now that the summer is upon me though, methinks I should buy some new games. Any suggestions? Woody On Fire!
- I've got both of those, never really got into halo though. But GT4 is great fun, never gonna finish the story though because I get distracted far too easily, never played it online though. ~Orian57~
- Never played it. Right now it is Halo3 (I'm finally getting to be decent now that people have stopped playing it) and GTA4. I just like jumping out of cars. Just awesome. Woody On Fire!
- Oh yeah I know, me and sissy do that quite a lot, gets confusing when you're each cursing about soemthing different though. :) and yeah I look forward to it. Do you have gears of war 2? Cos I tottaly love that game! ~Orian57~
- Also, woody, I've been meaning to ask, that's not you with the squiffy nose up there, is it? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 15:54 9 May 2009
- Don't you remember? He made a special forum topic to report the broken status of his nose. —Sir Socky
(talk) (stalk)
GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 16:03, 9 May 2009 (UTC)
- Nope, though I was away alot in March/April and havent really gotten back into the habit of checking the forums. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:08 9 May 2009
- Ok, I'm caught up with the old news now (utterly flattered that UU mentioned me when I wasn't even around, I think I might be popular!) Except for... How did it happen? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 16:25 9 May 2009
- Yes, as Socky has updated you, that's surely me, and my broken face. Well, as it were, I was playing Ultimate Frizbee and was playing some defense, and I went to knock a pass down, but there were 4 of us jumping, and when we all came down one of the guy's feet got tangled and he fell backwards. So, how did it happen? The back of a guy's head slammed into my face, and my nose decided it really didn't want to be there anymore and did a little moving (insert gay jokes now). But, and this is the most important part, I did knock the pass down, so I think we know who the winner was in that confrontation. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 16:47, 9 May 2009 (UTC)
- Yes, as Socky has updated you, that's surely me, and my broken face. Well, as it were, I was playing Ultimate Frizbee and was playing some defense, and I went to knock a pass down, but there were 4 of us jumping, and when we all came down one of the guy's feet got tangled and he fell backwards. So, how did it happen? The back of a guy's head slammed into my face, and my nose decided it really didn't want to be there anymore and did a little moving (insert gay jokes now). But, and this is the most important part, I did knock the pass down, so I think we know who the winner was in that confrontation. Woody On Fire!
- Nope, though I was away alot in March/April and havent really gotten back into the habit of checking the forums. ~Orian57~
- Don't you remember? He made a special forum topic to report the broken status of his nose. —Sir Socky
hello psychick[edit | edit source]
hello. i am looking for reservations on the future. just the future. i don't own anything but i should want to know about the reservations just in case. i can never be too careful. you can though. --
-kun "whisper sweet nothings into thine ear..." 22:54, 11 May 2009 (UTC)
Press Call for Woody[edit | edit source]
So, any comments on your essay for this week's USP? --UU - natter 09:06, May 12
- Does it need a comment? The article pretty much speaks for itself... ummmm.... Just tell everyone I will question their sexuality unless they read my article. That might be the best way to get them to read it. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 09:12, 12 May 2009 (UTC)
- That's not gonna work on Orian for one... OK, I'll create a kind of "word collage" from your comments on Mordillo's page and the article talk page. Then take it all hilariously out of context in true UnSignpost tradition (without the "hilarious", naturally). Or maybe not, in this case. Anyway, I now have enough to fill this week's issue, I just need to write the bastard! --UU - natter
09:16, May 12
- Don't even start that "you can change" shit with me! Ok? I'm gay there's no two ways about it, thats for those greedy bisexual fucks. ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 09:19 12 May 2009
- No, I can easily question his homosexuality (HA! like anyone could!). Still, the word collage would be for best. AND, I'm always happy to whore myself out so that you can finish your work. Really, a pleasure. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 09:20, 12 May 2009 (UTC)
- Don't even start that "you can change" shit with me! Ok? I'm gay there's no two ways about it, thats for those greedy bisexual fucks. ~Orian57~
- That's not gonna work on Orian for one... OK, I'll create a kind of "word collage" from your comments on Mordillo's page and the article talk page. Then take it all hilariously out of context in true UnSignpost tradition (without the "hilarious", naturally). Or maybe not, in this case. Anyway, I now have enough to fill this week's issue, I just need to write the bastard! --UU - natter
Rules...[edit | edit source]
I read your bit about Rules<Funny and couldn't agree more. I wish it was understood by all on short notice. "Don't be a dick" should be elaborated a bit because it's clearly about how we should respect others perhaps having a different sense of humerrrr. I'll have to whore a bit on the side. Did you read this: Edgar_van_Dali? I know the idea is as old as these sites and vandalism, but it's my own take and I think it's fresh(ish). -- Style 
Guide 06:21, 16 May 2009 (UTC)
- Erm - to be exact, not actually whoring. I pushed it at you just to read, not nominate. That would be stupid - it would never be highlighted for several reasons. -- Style
Guide 12:45, 16 May 2009 (UTC) - Good to hear I have people on my side. Funny is funny, that's all I want to get across. Comedy is what matters, screw the rest of it. I'll read the Edgar thingy in a few days. As of right now I am a little busy. Working, and I haven't even started work yet.... if that makes any sense. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 06:52, 17 May 2009 (UTC)
- It's the normal way with all of us who have a computer. While you're at it, here's my plea for changing things a bit, you might be interested: Forum:We need more "front pages!" - Oops, forgot to sign. -- Style Guide 19:05, 17 May 2009 (UTC)
- I agree with your rules<funny thing, but I want to take it a step further: I don't think people should vote against at all. I really don't see how voting against helps anyone or anything... just my take. (Although, I do vote against on articles by people who already have a million features) Anyway, nice to see you again, Woody! • <15:04 May 17, 2009>
- Hmmmm.... Cajek? Must be a dream. Yeah, I do remember you talking about no against votes at an earlier time.... However I haven't seen it written in a tl;dr essay that is whored to
The whole communitythe readers of the Unsignpost. Everyone knows you haven't really hit the big time until that happens. It's ok though man, one day you will hit the big time. Good luck with your 29 and a half features, like THAT would get you anywhere on this site.... (P.S. Hope you didn't mind me quoting you in that essay. Also I hope I got that quote right.... If I f'ed it up, let me know please.) Woody On Fire!Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:50, 17 May 2009 (UTC)
- You're right, I did say that... You're right on another count, too: I feel pressured to write high-minded articles now, and I just can't do them like some of these other guys can. That's not to discount their personal tastes, though... Oh, and if this were a dream, how come I'm naked? • <18:22 May 17, 2009>
- Sounds like a dream to me... :) ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:31 17 May 2009
- gasp! Mr. Orian! I'm just an intern here! /me hungrily eyes Mr. Orian as he leaves the cubicle, leaving him with the slightest hope that someday he and that sexay intern could potentially hump like weasels in heat • <18:49 May 17, 2009>
- :D heya Cajek! Good to see you back! Your metaphor is all wrong though, I'm the intern. I only have a third of the features you have (well by tommorow, provided nothing drastic happens, not that I'm being presumptious because that one on VFH isn't my best). But yeah. Good to see ya! ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 18:55 17 May 2009
- Yeah, high-minded articles are great, but I like some crazy stuff too. And would somebody please get these gays off my lawn! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 23:15, 17 May 2009 (UTC)
- Yeah, high-minded articles are great, but I like some crazy stuff too. And would somebody please get these gays off my lawn! Woody On Fire!
- :D heya Cajek! Good to see you back! Your metaphor is all wrong though, I'm the intern. I only have a third of the features you have (well by tommorow, provided nothing drastic happens, not that I'm being presumptious because that one on VFH isn't my best). But yeah. Good to see ya! ~Orian57~
- gasp! Mr. Orian! I'm just an intern here! /me hungrily eyes Mr. Orian as he leaves the cubicle, leaving him with the slightest hope that someday he and that sexay intern could potentially hump like weasels in heat • <18:49 May 17, 2009>
- Sounds like a dream to me... :) ~Orian57~
- You're right, I did say that... You're right on another count, too: I feel pressured to write high-minded articles now, and I just can't do them like some of these other guys can. That's not to discount their personal tastes, though... Oh, and if this were a dream, how come I'm naked? • <18:22 May 17, 2009>
- Hmmmm.... Cajek? Must be a dream. Yeah, I do remember you talking about no against votes at an earlier time.... However I haven't seen it written in a tl;dr essay that is whored to
- I agree with your rules<funny thing, but I want to take it a step further: I don't think people should vote against at all. I really don't see how voting against helps anyone or anything... just my take. (Although, I do vote against on articles by people who already have a million features) Anyway, nice to see you again, Woody! • <15:04 May 17, 2009>
- It's the normal way with all of us who have a computer. While you're at it, here's my plea for changing things a bit, you might be interested: Forum:We need more "front pages!" - Oops, forgot to sign. -- Style
Done[edit | edit source]
Why?:Be like The Woodburninator (and join his bear army)?. --Docile hippopotamus 08:00, 16 May 2009 (UTC)
Something new, maybe[edit | edit source]
My plea seems to be on its way to be OK'd by the Cabal. If nobody has any huge againsters, we will soon have some portals by category (Science, Sports, Politics, This, That) beside the category list, top of front page. They will be like supplements in a newspaper, is my idea: a place for stuff the keeper of the portal sees as good, even if not worthy of front page. Details haven't been worked out yet. I suppose the Cabal (the non-existent one) will point the people to work them. -- Style Guide 13:25, 18 May 2009 (UTC)
Porntals[edit | edit source]
A few of the front page category portals are still without creators and people to run them, see Portal:Science to see what they would be. They're a good way to promote funny without front page, so please pick one and go at it. Science, Games, Politics, Computers and Art are all on their way - People, Quaint and Coherent are not. If those don't appeal, an idea might be to ask Spang or Mordillo or someone about putting something else but Coherent and Quaint in their stead if you have ideas, and make portals based on that. Science portal is running almost the way it should already, you can suggest articles for promotion etc. and my idea is the rest of the portals will work just about the same way. -- Style Guide 18:51, 26 May 2009 (UTC)
- Hmmm... I can take a look on suggesting articles and whatnot, but I doubt I'll be doing any portal creation. I haven't gotten around to reading a lot of the many forums yet. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 18:56, 26 May 2009 (UTC)
Thanks[edit | edit source]
|
Thanks for voting for my article, Dear Diary. And do rest assured that I am not a violent or vindictive person, and that voting no would have in no way resulted in me abusing my administrative powers to crush you like a grape. ~ Todd Lyons |
haha[edit | edit source]
I enjoyed your comment on Noob of the Month. Thanks for the vote, too. Staircase CUNt 20:39, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
- Well, when you turn out to be NXWave or someone like that, I won't be surprised. Regardless, you seem to be pretty cool, hence my vote. Keep it up. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 20:53, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
- What's a NXWave? Staircase CUNt 21:05, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
- Right... Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 21:16, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
- No I don't know. Seriously. Staircase CUNt 21:29, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
- Right... Woody On Fire!
- What's a NXWave? Staircase CUNt 21:05, 1 June 2009 (UTC)
sorry!![edit | edit source]
I STOPPED DOING GOATSE. It wasnt me, it was my brother... or something. No, it really was
VERY VERY VERY INCOHERENTLY HYPERBOLICALLY UPSET[edit | edit source]
WHY DO U HAT MICHEL FELPS HE'S DUH GREETEST HE CAN SWIM FASTR THAN U AND SMOKE MORE POT THAN U & UR HOLE FAMILY!!! STOP!! LEAVE MICHEL FELPS ALONE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!! IP ADDRESS 04:05, 3 June 2009 (UTC)
- Oh he makes me sick! He makes me so damn sick! Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 04:06, 3 June 2009 (UTC)
Him in the bottom left[edit | edit source]
Is he Nick from CSI? ~Orian57~ ~Talk~ 07:20 3 June 2009
- Nah man. That, my friend, is Dave Coulier (pronounced Cool-yay) of Full House fame. Two
interestingfacts about Dave Coulier:- The Alanis Morissette song "You oughta know" is actually about him.
- He came to my school, and did a stand up routine.
- He was pretty good I guess. Nothing too great, but sufficient. But he's Joey from Full House! Awesomeness. Woody On Fire! Talking Woody Stalking Woody 17:02, 4 June 2009 (UTC)