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The 10th edition of the Poo Lit Surprise writing competition is now open for submissions. 
Somebody touch me.
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Vigilance shall be visited upon this vermin-filled vestige forthwith!
Victims without value, vacant of vitality, shall vanish.
Volunteer for vindication!
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Forest Fire Week!Uncyclopedia is currently under Martial Law. Cleanup is in progress for the week of
November 16th to
23rd.Administrators are under orders to delete any pages out after curfew or without passports. Editors beware!
This page is a piece of crap. The author(s) acknowledge this.
Charlie Kirk was a right-wing political activist, master(de)bater, possessor of the world's largest non-equine set of gums, and penitent God-fearer. He was best known for being a follower of Christ, having a perfectly proportioned smile, and for founding Turning Point USA, a conservative advocacy group which sought to bridge the political divide wrecking our nation by browbeating and clip-farming America's most retarded liberals for social media clout. His viral debate clips garnered tens of millions of views, and his staunch defense of pro-life, pro-gun, and pro-America viewpoints earned him comparisons to the inimitable William F. Buckley Jr., minus the part where he was a closeted homosexual. An ardent supporter of President Donald Trump, he dedicated his life to spreading the Judeo-Christian values of free expression, America First, and branded hat salesmanship. (Full article...)
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Did you know...
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*... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
- ... that not all πr². There are also many π that r rounded?
- ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
- ... that not all πr². There are also many π that r rounded?
- ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
- ... that not all πr². There are also many π that r rounded?
- ... that we must nuke the whales, or the hippies will win?
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In the news
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One simply cannot piss until he scans this.
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On this day...
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October 14: National Hit an Annoying Person in the Head Day
- 1066 - William the Conqueror punches an opposing soldier in the head at the Battle of Hastings.
- 1922 - A man is punched in the head after he uses the elevator to ride a single floor instead of taking the stairs opposite the elevators.
- 1999 - A PC spits a CD out of its CD-ROM drive, hitting Bill Gates in the head. This is the first confirmed instance of artificial intelligence.
- 2003 - George of the Jungle was captured by a nearby tree, which promptly clubbed him in the head. Apparently the tree was meditating when George's distracting collisions occurred.
- 2009 - Someone hits an annoying person with a stick 9 times.
- Future - <insert name here> is brutally hit over the head with clubs for being an Uncyclopedian.
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Featured picture
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August 6, 1945: After being given superpowers by the Manhattan Project, Harry S. Truman, the Truman Torch, personally drops the atomic bomb on Hiroshima, Japan, signalling the beginning of the end of World War II.
Truman's flight was the culmination of the Manhattan Project, a sustained secret project by the United States military to develop superpowers in order to resurrect the American Justice Coalition. Because superhero technology was so valuable, the project was disguised as an effort to create a nuclear bomb, a deception that was so complete that the nuclear bomb was also developed. Subsequently, all American presidents have been endowed with superpowers and occasionally fight together as the New American Justice Coalition.
Image credit: Isra1337 View image · Nominate new image · View all featured images
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This Uncyclopedia, started in 2005, currently contains 40,772 articles. Uncyclopedias are being written in many languages, including Kippy/BigUglyTemplateopedia!:
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