User:Roozie/Main Page Black
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{| style="width:100%; background:#fcfcfc; margin-top:1.2em; border:1px solid #ccc;" |style="width:56%; color:#000"| {| style="width:280px; border:solid 0px; background:none;" |style="width:280px; text-align:center; white-space:nowrap; color:#000;"| Welcome to Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia that anyone can edit. 40,291 articles in English |} |style="width:11%; font-size:95%; color:#000;"| *Politics *Games *Music |style="width:11%; font-size:95%;"| *Science *History *Art |style="width:11%; font-size:95%; color:#000;"| *Television *Film *Theatre |style="width:11%; font-size:95%;"| *Society *People *All Portals |} {|style="width:100%; background:none; margin:-.8em 0 -.7em 0;" |style="font-size:95%; padding:10px 0; margin:0px; text-align:left; white-space:nowrap; color:#000;"| Beginner's Guide · The Big Five · Style · Questions · Help · Donations |style="font-size:95%; padding:10px 0; margin:0px; text-align: right; white-space:nowrap; color:#000;"| Categories · Featured content · A–Z index |} {| style="border-spacing:8px;margin:0px -8px" |width="55%" class="MainPageBG" style="border:1px solid #cef2e0; background-color:#f2fff9; vertical-align:top;"| {| width="100%" cellpadding="2" cellspacing="5" style="vertical-align:top; background-color:#f2fff9;" | "What Would Jesus Do?" is the most popularly over-asked question in the history of man, just edging out, Baby, if you've never tried anal sex, how do you know you won't like it? It is also the most asked question in the history of women, just ahead of Do you think this makes my ass look fat? The question is commonly associated with dedicated followers of Christianity, but falsely so; true believers never ask that question as they know exactly what the Jesus would do. The simple query inspired the WWJD movement and spawned a multi-million dollar a year industry producing such wholesome family oriented items as charitable bracelets [1], lighters, belly-cut t-shirts [2], the finest of bumper stickers printed only in the smallest existing illegible fonts on Earth, and beer koozies. The capitalistic monster spawned by those four little words has grown into that which has lead some to believe modern Jesus just wants to bank some loot, buy some bling, and bang some bitches. This may well be true as he declined any interview for this article. (Full article...) Recently featured: Did you know...|- |
In the news|- |
Ongoing: The wait for GTA VI, Silksong, TAWOG, Stranger Things 5, and Spaceballs 2 • Russian Invasion • Gaza War • Trump and Elon's feud.. make up.. no one knows anymore • Animal-related live-action remakes kicking Snow White's ass • Jaws 50th anniversary • Colorado Rockies game replacing Jaws airing • Israel/Iran "peace talks" • Pittsburgh Steelers adding old players way past their prime • Rock drummer exodus (not to be confused with Tom Hunting or Zbigniew Fyk) Recent deaths: Ariana Grande's Nonna • Canadian team's bid to win the Stanley Cup, again • PF4Eva's headphone cable • Jimmy Swaggart • Diddy's freedom for only 20 years • Michael Madsen • Diogo Jota • Texas flood victims Upcoming deaths: DEI • Tom Cruise's career of sprinting on-screen • Pittsburgh Steelers' locker room • Greta Thunberg? • R. Kelly • Iran's nuclear program • Oil prices • Dumbasses with fireworks in their backyards • Diddy's bank account after incoming lawsuits • The asshats who spoiled Squid Game On this day...|- |July 11: International Pull My Finger Day; Fake Fart Appreciation Day (Rural Alabama, Georgia)
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Writer and Noob of the Month|- | Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome! So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore. Let us all clap for him because I said so.
|}the Fair Use Clause, and an elite clan of Clinjas. | |||||||||
