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The conveniently cheap userpage that nobody in their right minds should edit
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Rebecca Black is a living Dadaist masterpiece. Jointly authored by the almost hard-working semi-geniuses at ARK Music Factory, and by Black's proud parents who paid $4000 so she could make a video, Black's cultural satire in pop music featuring the innocence and gullibility of a 13-year-old girl has proven an unnatural success. Black now represents the Los Angeles Dadaist movement, which acts in direct competition with its New York counterpart which is highlighted by the Fountain by Marcel Duchamp and the Late Show with David Letterman. Her "popularization by viral video" of the song Friday starting in mid-March, 2011, marks a rebirth of dadaism and a watershed in human culture. (Full article...)
Did you know...
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
- ... that if the earth were the size of an apple, we would fall off?
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
- ... that if the earth were the size of an apple, we would fall off?
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
- ... that if the earth were the size of an apple, we would fall off?
- ... that the packets of silica gel that say "DO NOT EAT" are actually delicious?
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In the news
On this day...
July 26: Punch Your Girlfriend Day ( Michigan)
- 3400 B.C. – Cave man punch woman. then laugh
- 589 – King Arthur declares himself King of England after using Excalibur to hit his woman.
- 657 – Battle of Siffin. Theys was Diffin, yo. No I'm sayn, Bitch?
- 790 – The practice of "back handing" starts in Europe as a cure for the women talking. It has a success rate of 80%.
- 810 – The practice of "back handing" ends in Europe as reports of excessively clean houses increase.
- 1521 – Famed prophet Nostradamus predicts that the King of England will have an affair and take the Queen of France as his mistress.
- 1524 – Nostradamus's house gets egged by an angry mob as they find his prediction to be wrong and that the King of England does not take the Queen of France as his mistress, but the Prince of Germany.
- 1536 – King Henry VIII of England takes Punch Your Girlfriend day to new extremes, by killing two of his wives.
- 1590 – Martin Luther changes his "100 Thesis" to the "99 Thesis" by deleting the sentence, "Priests are not to be allowed to have relations with children."
- 1792 – The Whiskey Rebellion is lost as George Washington and his troops march to fight off rebels while they were drunk singing "99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer. We take one down, pass it around, and 98 bottles of beer on the wall..."
- 1812 – The War of 1812 starts as an 18 year old young British boy gets in a fist fight with a 12 year old American. The two nations get involved as they send reinforcements to help the children.
- 1834 – The whoopie cushion is invented as a seat cover, but does not sell well for making "sounds of unwanted body gases."
- 1870 – The typewriter is invented with only the keys Ctrl, Alt, and Delete.
- 1956 – Harry Belafonte is impregnated by deadly black tarantulas as Shari Belafonte is born among a bunch of bananas.
- 1966 – Bloblobo, king of Bababa, knights Bob the salesmen for his studies in the field of OhmygodIforgottochangemyboxersology.
- 1974 – A Scottish man is viciously attacked by an alien squid after mistaking the creature for his bagpipes. Several women are punched in the process.
- 1988 – Reading in terror - Godzilla is born in the Royal Berkshire Hospital.
- 1994 – Like Henry VIII, O.J. Simpson takes "punch your girlfriend day" a step further by murdering his wife.
- 1997 – Peter Piper picks a peck of pickled peppers. Pfft!
- 2000 – 35 people with the Y2K bug are hospitalized after having close physical contact with their computers.
- 2007 – The Green Archers are beaten by The Blue Eagles, The Archers then punch their girlfriends for not cheering hard enough. The Eagles punch their girlfriends in ecstasy.
- 2008 – Max Mosley celebrates "punch your girlfriend day" by dressing as a Nazi prison guard.
- 2089 – Chuck Norris punches girlfriend, waking his dentist and long-deceased great-great-great-great grandfather Odysseus.
- 3001 – Justin Bieber's preserved remains finally hit puberty.
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Today's featured picture
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Recent Articles
More recent articles |
Most wanted pages |
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Pee Review |
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Writer and Noob of the Month
Holy cock! We may have forgotten to update these over these last few months. The days we missed could be counted as few as if at all. We have just updated this since last May. How awesome!
So basically, let's get to business. Take off your pants; IFYMB! wins Writer of the Month for September 2014. His hit singles include the frankly libellous UnNews:Nude photos of celebrities leaked, the almost-topical UnDebate:What does the fox say? and the spiritually upliftingUnNews:Thursday is a dirty whore.
Let us all clap for him because I said so.
You only have 5 (five!) more days to nominate and vote for Writer of the Month, Noob of the Month and Uncyclopedian of the Month! Get voting!
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| Complete Bibliography
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| 8/3/2007
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Benjamin Franklinstein – Norelco, you betrayed me! Time for plan B...
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| 7/22/2007
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Norelco (obviously this is a personal favorite now)
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| 7/21/2007
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UnNews:J.K. Rowling reveals title for Harry Potter 8! (been waiting to post this since 2005!)
Not my best, but apparently VFH'd anyway. Kudos to User:Sonic80 for being my one supporter here. Note that that bit about Homer Simpson (and, well, that other thing) was not my idea, but oh well. Oh, and screw you, Michael Gerber.
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| 7/4/2007
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Benjamin Franklinstein
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| 7/4/2007
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Jolt Cola (rewrite)
Includes Image:Benjamin Franklinstein.jpg
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| 7/3/2007
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Norelco – pee review, resubmit (philosophy + shaving? bad combination...)
Also comes with Image:Mona Lisa Razor.jpg and Image:Occam's Razor in Action.jpg, yours free with paid order!
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| 6/26/2007
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The Human Element – waiting for pee review
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| 6/19/2007
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Image:American idols got talent.png. I hate that show.
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| 2/15/2007
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Geocities (I think this is where I put in {{:Me}})
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| 2/10/2007
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National Federation of the Blond (started, but needs a lot more blond jokes)
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| 2/9/2007
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UnNews:National Federation of the Blond: "Dye your hair, you're in danger!"
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| 2/5/2007
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Image:Thyspace.png (for Thyspace)
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| 2/5/2007
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Captain Omnipotent (section: Weaknesses + pic)
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| 1/18/2007
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Jolt Cola
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| 1/16/2007
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UnNews:Scientist experimenting on coffee arrested for blowing up universe
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| 6/3/2006
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Minimalist talk page
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| 6/3/2006
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Deep Note
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| 3/4/2006
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Geocities (really crappy original version)
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| 1/9/2006
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I Fucking Hate the Bermuda Triangle (added line: ships and planes...with chips on plates)
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| 11/30/2005
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Celine Dionide
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| 11/20/2005
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Image:Palpatines guide to facial care.jpg
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| 11/3/2005
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UnPoetia:Norbert Percy Tangleknickers
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WTF?
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Update
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