User:Sonic80

::/Random Sonic80 Article/:: HowTo:Win a Darwin Award Welcome to Sonic80: UnNews Correspondent extraordinaire. Currently finishing off old Articles I didn't quite abandon (see this and this). UnNewses will recommence when they are finished. March 26, 2024 17:23 UTC Talk to me | Contribute My Current Projects | Awards and Badges Population of men who identify as gay up nearly 200% in month following leak of Snooki nudes MARLBORO, New York -- Pregnant Jersey Shore star, Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, has once again grabbed headlines in the last month, becoming the most recent pop culture star to have intimate photographs leaked from their cellphone. In the month since their release, the LGBT community has announced a massive increase in new membership among recently out of the closet males, many of whom had never exhibited homosexual tendencies prior to viewing the photos. » Full story Latest news reports: Whats this? Sonic80 is writing News again? Apparently... But what happened to all the old news articles you wrote Sonic80? Have no fear! They have been nicely collected HERE! 2012 Population of men who identify as gay up nearly 200% in month following leak of Snooki nudes - July 3rd 2011 Monster solar storm, 'Global Katrina,' could steal babies, kick puppies - February 21st My bracket is busted - March 17th Rebecca Black crashes Twitter, disrupts Libyan war - March 21st 'Spider-Man' Broadway show opens without a hitch; closes while on top - June 14th Tragedy in Europe; Amy Winehouse found dead in home - July 23rd July 2010 Republicans to Republicans: Fuck Republicans! - July 1st Local man's malignant stomach tumor miraculously dissolves into fat - July 19th Drunken expletive-laced rant lands soulless marketing drone in prison - July 31st June 2010 America: Oh, You mean 'Soccer'! - June 19th Clinton spotted outside cave, in public - June 28th Featured Article: Art That Looks Like Nothing This person wrote an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Ain't they clever?! Featured Article: Good Old Days This person wrote an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Ain't they clever?! Featured Article: HowTo:Understand Jersey Shore This person wrote an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Ain't they clever?! Featured Article: UnMovie Review:Inception (2010) This person wrote an article which became one of the Featured Articles on Uncyclopedia. Ain't they clever?! BEST OF Sonic80: 'Spider-Man' Broadway show opens without a hitch; closes while on top NEW YORK, New York -- The brand new, mixed-review Broadway show, Spider-Man: Turn Off the Dark finally opened today after a series of performance related injuries, technical errors, and a general inability to complete the two-act musical in under four and a half hours delayed its original release date by several months. The cast and crew were pleased to say that the show "opened without a hitch," which was new for them. The opening night of the $65 million show went so well, according to director Julie Taymor, that "tonight's show marks the closing of Turn off the Dark." » Full story Sonic80's non-UnNews Articles 33/50 Knut 38/50 HowTo:Win A Darwin Award 42.5/50Art That Looks Like Nothing (15/4/4) 31.3/50 (PLS) Heath Ledger (rw) 25/50That time I was nearly raped by a camel during my sojourn in Mecca Why?:Did I just read Twilight? 37.2/50(CW) Spore (rw) (CW) Civilization IV (rw) 33.8/50(CW) International Talk Like A Landlubber Day (rw) 38.8/50(CW) Gameboy Micro (rw) 35.6/50(CW) Cookie Monster (rw) 34/5041/50Ghetto White Boy Syndrome Letter to You in Rateme.com (PLS) HowTo:Online Jihad (rw) 42/50 Jew Beanie 33.2/50Tits or GTFO! 32.5/50(HC)Jabulani 38/50Why?:Brush your teeth with a bottle of Jack? (9/3/1) 34/5036/50Parallel Parking 43.75/50Good Old Days (rw) (13/0/0) 33.8/5037.5/50HowTo:Understand Jersey Shore (11/0/0) - Top 3 Sept. 2010 UnTweets:California Gurl 50*/50UnMovie Review:Inception (2010) (12/1.5/0) - Top 3 Sept. 2010 Generic Theory of Probably Something (PLS) I'd Like to Talk to you about Jesus Christine O'Donnell